__
                    __ _ / _|_ __ ___
           _____   / _` | |_| '_ ` _ \   _____
          |_____| | (_| |  _| | | | | | |_____|
                   \__,_|_| |_| |_| |_|
                   Another Foggy Moment

 These are the continuing adventures of a typical resident
 of the self-proclaimed center of the Pugetopolis universe -
 Seattle. Most are true stories but some are made of whole-
 cloth. I ain't the Mayor, the Governor or a Big Shot. Just
 another Working Stiff with a Bad Attitude.

    ------------------------------------------------
    WARNING: This is not a Child-Proof Neighborhood.
    If you're a kid - scram!, beat it! you little
    punk before your Old Lady catches you and calls
    the cops. They'll throw you in the Big House in
    Walla Walla and won't let you out until you're
    89 years old. There. Don't say I didn't warn you.
    -------------------------------------------------

                          - 145 -

 Mr. Trummel's humble webpages remain up:
	contracabal.net [Washington State version]
        contracabal.org [International version]
 So I assume that he remains locked up in the KingCo Hoosegow
 on orders from King Country Inferior Court judge Jimmy "The
 Token Twinkie" Doerty's orders until he 'sanitizes' the org
 site. But being in jail, Paul has no web access and couldn't
 clean the webpage up even in the unlikely event he wanted to. 
 Doh! Catch-22. King County Inferior Court judges ain't too 
 bright. But they all give good Political Head. Just ask 
 Governor Stinky.

 While the local News Nazis obligingly keep the embarassing
 story out of the public eye as much as possible so as not to 
 upset anybody in Olympia, the rest of the world is still 
 interested. Newsbytes.com, says that aside from not being 
 allowed to take the supplements he uses to control his 
 arthritis and prostrate problems, Mr. Trummel has now tested 
 positive for TB. And they added, that being a British subject 
 though a permanent resident alien, the British Foreign Office 
 has now contacted the hillbillies at King County Inferior asking
 them what the hell they think they're doing. If you want to
 know what's going on in Seattle you'll have to look elsewhere
 obviously. Our News Nazis aren't going to tell you.

                               * 

 It was 32 years ago Sunday that 7,000 anti-government terrorists
 in Seattle protesting Uncle Sammy's illegal invasion of Cambodia
 performed the most heinous crimnal act known to man (well to
 Seattle man anyways): they blocked traffic. Oh the Inhumanity!
 The horror! Thousands of innocent Americans just minding their
 own business out driving down I-5 through the U District were
 forced to sit motionless in their vehicles for endless moments 
 while the terrorists defied the traffic laws by marching down 
 the 45th Street entrance ramp and, ignoring the little traffic 
 light, merged into traffic eventually filling all lanes. Many 
 were convinced it was the end of civilization as they then
 knew it. Anarchy prevailed. The locals, with characteristic
 perspective, hardly even noticed the four dead students at 
 Ohio's Kent State University that occurred about the same time. 

 Oh well. The next day over 10,000 protestors marched from the
 U Dub campus to downtown vowing to honor the dead and bring
 home the living. They also 'liberated' KUOW and renamed it
 Radio Free Seattle. That was back in the days when Seattle 
 still had a soul. It's a safe bet neither Governor Stinky 
 nor "Cadillac" Sims, our pious liberal leaders, were in the 
 marches. Wouldn't want to compromise their future electability.

 thanks to: Daily Bleed http://www.eskimo.com/~recall/bleed

                             *

 Those hillbillies back in Kentucky may have their Kentucky Derby
 but we got something better on the same weekend - The Annual
 Reggata on the Ship Canal. By Friday night a massive flotilla
 of hundreds of pleasure craft had assembled in Lake Washington's
 Union Bay hard-by the Montlake Cut entrance to the Ship Canal, 
 preparing for Saturday's proceedings. A cute little viewing
 stand surrounded by an equally cute faux white-picket-fence was 
 set up for the VIPs on a lonely, grassy stretch near the middle 
 of 'The Cut' just the other side of the old Montlake Bridge. It 
 was complete with its own surly, unarmed guard who obsessively 
 paced it's tiny perimeter. As I passed by him at the crack of 
 dawn, he halted his pacing and eyed me suspiciously with nary so 
 much as a 'Good Morning'. Apparently satisfied that I wasn't a 
 Muslim Extremist bent on Evil, he allowed me to pass unchallenged
 in the distance. Phew! Two TV cameras were mounted to either 
 side of the Union Bay entrance to The Cut, thoughtfully draped 
 in plastic on account of the precipitously gray, overcast skies. 
 It was pretty dang cold too. Perfect Northwest weather for a 
 boat race or a football game. I didn't stick around for the races. 
 I've been watching the Dawgs practice for months now. Looked about 
 as exciting as watching paint dry. Besides, I had to get a few 
 bets down on the Derby.

                                 *

 Thank heavens SOMEONE around here has some guts. I'm talking 
 about the recent decision by Butt-Ugly Field (aka Safco Field), 
 America's tiniest, most-expensive and ugliest baseball park, 
 to ban fans who wear "Yankees Suck" t-shirts to games. The 
 Yankees, winners of many World Series (lately at Seattle's 
 expense) clearly do not 'suck'. It would be factually incorrect 
 to assert that they do. The Mariners on the other hand, who have 
 never even appeared in a World Series EVER in the entire history 
 of their Luser franchise, clearly DO suck. So presumedly Butt-
 Ugly's management, sticklers for factual correctness that they 
 are, wouldn't object to people wearing a "Mariners Suck" t-shirt 
 to the games. Bravo Butt-Ugly for keeping the world safe for the 
 Yankees. They'll be back again this year to collect their annual
 free trip to the World Series courtesy of Loserville Lou and his
 Japanese All-Star team. 

 Meanwhile, at Wrigley Field in Chicago they got bigger fish to 
 fry. Anybody caught taking a public Whiz will get slapped with 
 a $500 fine. Try something like that at Butt-Ugly and you'll 
 freeze your Willy off. Damn! It's cold in there! BU's got to be 
 the Chill Factor succesor to old Candlestick Park in Frisco. 
 Actually, the intriguing part of the Cubbies story is that about 
 a third of the offenders are women. I predict Howard Stern will 
 move his show to Chicago and become a raving Cubbie fan doing 
 live broadcasts from the stands on game days, including a special 
 "Golden Shower" segment in which "High Pitch Eric" finally gets
 a date. Howie could easily cover any fines levied. Don't forget 
 where you heard it first.

                              *

 After trashing our state's economy, the Little Stinker - our Guv, 
 is tottering right along on his elevator shoes to his next great 
 challenge: bagging our public education system. He did afterall 
 declare himself "The Education Governor". We thought he meant he'd
 fix it. Pshaw! Silly us! He meant he'd trash it. 

 Largely reduced to a half-assed government-sponsored baby-sitting
 service, our schools suck bad enough as it is. While our News 
 Nazis focus on the top few performers, fact is, our schools crank 
 out functional illiterates by the thousands every year. The vast 
 majority of this year's grads will be incapable of understanding 
 the news with any significant degree of comprehension, be utterly
 ignorant of our uniquely American system of laws and be incapable 
 of performing the simplest algebraic computation. If asked whether
 the earth revolves around the Sun or the Sun around the earth -
 at least half will get it wrong. Guaranteed. Washington state 
 schools manufacture dopes, morons and dumb-asses. These people 
 aren't born stupid, they're MADE stupid by an education system that 
 is far more interested in rigid social conformity than it is in
 education.
 
 So maybe Governor Stinky's doing us a favor by slashing the hell
 outta the education budget and reducing university education to
 a privilege reserved for only the most wealthy of our citizens.
 And the Boeings, who desert our shores because of our lousy schools,
 will have that much more reason to be confident that they made
 the right decision. But the teachers he used to get re-elected
 with his promises of a grand committment to education have good
 cause to feel like they got screwed. Screwed by Stinky and
 screwed by their own union who so readily sold them out. It isn't
 that they get nothing for their trouble, they'll actually lose
 a good chunk of the little they have. 
 
                                * 

 Rannan Gizin, Chief Bagman of the Sacred Jewish Homeland of Israel,
 Inc., recently made one of his periodic trips to our shores to
 fleece his lambs. While it has gone completely unreported by our
 News Nazis, there is enormous upheaval within America's Jewish
 community over recent events. Herr Gizin has good reason for 
 concern. As Israel comes more and more to resemble a Profane
 Jewish Homeland of racist bigots out to slaughter off its entire
 Palestinian minority and trash the ancient holy places of other
 religions, it's making Jews nervous. This isn't the Israel they
 bargained for. This isn't the Israel promised to them by HaShem.
 This is a vicious, oppressive, secular and Godless fake foisted 
 on them by the greedy amongst them. An illusion and schimera
 concealing a stinking moral cesspool.

 The turmoil within Israeli society, though again completely 
 concealed by our News Nazis, is hitting extremes as well. Take 
 ancient Yaffa Yarkoni, the "Singer of the Wars". For decades
 she has marched off to battle with the Israeli army to rouse
 their spirits with her patriotic songs. She has become a 
 national icon for the fighting Israeli spirit. But not this
 time. This time she very publically said that what she saw of 
 General Sharon's campaign against the Palestinians eerily 
 reminded her of the Nazis genocidal campaign against her own 
 Jewish people. And yes, she did use the 'Nazi' word. Bingo!
 She was instantly transformed by the Israeli government and
 News media from a reverred national icon into a virtual enemy
 of the state. They stripped her of her many honors, cancelled
 the official tribute that was to be made to her and publically
 spit on and disgraced her name. That's how Israel honors its
 'national mothers'. It's somewhat outside Jewish traditions
 and laws. But then so is Israel.

 Yaffa, never being much in the ass-kissing department, remains
 unbowed by this official disgrace. She says she'll put her 
 grandkids in foreign schools to escape Israel's insanity. 
 They'll have to learn how to become real Jews somewhere outside 
 of 'The Sacred Jewish Homeland' of Israel as it ain't possible 
 to learn how there any longer.

 And Yaffa wasn't the only one by a long shot. Sharon's long 
 time sidekick and most trusted advisor, Uri Shani, quit and
 went home too. He doesn't recognize his old friend any more
 and wants nothing to do with Sharon's bigotted insanity.

                              *

 They're breathing a little easier in Cambodia these days. The
 sacred oxen went for the rice, beans and corn at the annual
 plowing ceremony and stayed away from the booze. Since long
 before anybody can remember, the royal astrologers have made 
 their annual predictions for the coming year on the basis of 
 what the oxen choose to eat out of all the stuff laid out for 
 them. If they HAD gone for the booze it would have meant all 
 hell would break loose in war and chaos. Phew! Makes you wonder
 why they even take the chance of setting stuff like that out
 there to tempt fate eh. Prime Minister Hun Sen refused to 
 attend this year's feed claiming the astrologers screwed up 
 last year by not predicting the terrible floods that hit. 
 The old political double-standard eh. They can screw up all 
 THEY want but everybody else has to be perfect.

                              *

 If you're going to France anytime soon, don't expect much to
 be open between Friday and Monday. Ever since they went to a
 mandatory 35-hour work week to create jobs, the weekends are
 starting on Thursday nights and ending on Monday nights. I
 can easily imagine many Americans going for such a deal but
 I could never imagine our Corporate Nazis agreeing to it. 
 Unless they are allowed to work us to death, they just ain't
 happy. The Frogs BTW not only have government-sponsored day
 care centers for working families (they don't confuse schools
 with day-care centers) and what is considered, along with the 
 Wops, one the best health-care systems in the world. Far better 
 than our hyper-tech/pill-popping medical bullshit. They know 
 how to take care of business and enjoy life.

.................................................................

 COMPONENT EQUIVALENCY NOTICE:
 The sub-atomic particles (electrons, protons, etc.) comprising
 this product are exactly the same in every measurable respect
 to those used in the products of other manufacturers, and no
 claim to the contrary may legitimately be expressed or implied.

 from: Consumer Physics Warnings
..................................................................

                   THE GURU OF GIGGLING
   
  "Ho-ho yoga was invented by Dr Madan Kataria," Vijay Singh
   explained to students at a Los Angeles workshop, "a genius 
   who is known in Bombay as `the Guru of Giggling'. Unlike 
   conventional laughter, which is inspired by bad puns and 
   human misery, our therapeutic laughter is thought-free, and 
   is based on ancient techniques. And if you enrol on one of 
   our courses, you will learn Dr. Kataria's secret teachings 
   about the effects of laughter on human physiology, and will 
   literally laugh your way to health. "So far, 225 certified 
   laughter leaders have been trained in the United States and 
   Canada," he continued, "and they now direct hundreds of groups 
   across North America. There are more than a dozen different 
   techniques to learn, and these include:
     * Lion laughter, where people pounce at each other, grunting 
       loudly, wagging their tongues, and pawing the air with 
       imaginary claws:
     * Chicken-skip laughter, where everyone breaks into titters, 
       moving their upper arms sideways like flapping wings;
     * Monkey laughter, where they place the feet wide apart, 
       bend forward, and laugh while scratching the underarms;
     * Pillsbury Dough Boy laughter, where there is mutual poking 
       of stomachs; and
     * Austin Powers laughter, where people imitate the snicker 
       of Dr. Evil, with their pinkie placed alongside their mouth.
       
   "Daily practice of Ho-ho yoga techniques is guaranteed to keep 
   you free from colds, coughs, and stress. And if you fall ill 
   during the course, all fees will be refunded." 

                  San Francisco Chronicle
                          3/27/02

........................................................................

                      PATRIOT'S SONG

 I am a patriot. I'm a proud, flag-waving nephew of my Uncle Sam.
 I truely am. I say this because patriotism has been taking a bad
 rap lately. It's become the property of bigots, war-mongers and
 fast-buck artists who really don't know shit about what America 
 means, or particularily care. To them, it's a paycheck and/or a 
 licence to hate. Nothing more.

 Unlike most of my fellow Americans, I've spent a substantial amount
 of my life outside of America. Wherever I went, I was immediately
 fingered as an American. Might just as well had "U.S.A." tatooed
 on my goddam forehead. And what this did, is force me to think
 often and hard about what it means to be an American. It's not
 something most Americans really give much thought about. It's just
 a fact of life. 

 Perhaps because this occurred beyond our borders, I came to think 
 of America less as a geographical place than as a concept. For most
 of the people I ran into, the names of our cities and states were 
 just words. Aside from sounding interesting or being spelt in an
 unusual and/or non-intuitive way, they meant little to them. Go 
 ahead and try to explain what Chicago is or describe California 
 to someone who has never been there. I admit, I tried and quickly 
 gave up the effort. It just can't be done in a meaningful way. 
 Even pictures ain't much help - they just confuse the issue. 
 A picture may be worth a thousand words, but it's rarely the
 same thousand words for each person.

 We share much in common with our fellow human-beings around the 
 world. Makes sense - we're from many of the places they're from.
 But I mean we have many of the same physical and emotional needs
 and ambitions as they do: food, shelter, rest, work to do, 
 someone who cares about us, success for our kids, etc. Whether
 you're talking about Palestinians or Pennsylvanians, Israelis
 or Iowans, makes no difference. People are people.

 What makes us different from one another is our communities and
 societies - our cultures. I'm not talking about the wide variety
 of ethnic and religious sub-cultures within a nation, but rather 
 about each country's 'national culture'. Those ideas and institutions 
 that regulate its daily life and the values they embody. The ways 
 they define what it means to be a human-being within them as well 
 as how they enforce that definition. In that regard, we differ
 substantially from one another. And that variety and diversity 
 is a very Good Thing indeed.

 It was because of this diversity that we emerged. For the first
 time in human history, a nation embraced democracy instead of
 monarchy as its political system. For the first in human history,
 a nation incorporated into its system of laws, guarantees of
 fundamental equality and human rights. Nobody had ever done that
 before though many thousands died trying. This bold move of ours
 inspired poets like Scotland's Robbie Burns and England's William
 Blake to proclaim the birth of the "New American Man". And indeed,
 that's exactly what occured. Our very existence became a threat 
 to Kings and Queens everywhere and an inspiration to revolutionaries 
 and radicals around the world. We showed Europe how to dump their
 royal freeloaders and call their own shots. And they soon followed
 our lead. Asia's been a bit slower to respond.

 And that's why I'm a patriot. What makes America Kick-Ass isn't
 our SUVs or the Pentagoon's Daisy Cutters, it isn't our dazzling
 supermarkets and cheap/flashy skyscrapers. It's our dedication
 to 'the pursuit of happiness' and our big, fat Dream of freedom,
 equality and liberty for all. No, we haven't realized it. Yes,
 we often have shown contempt for it. But we have refused to ditch
 it. We will not abandon that dream, as easy as it would be to do.
 It belongs not to the politicians in Washington, DC and our state
 capitals, but to us - the people of the United States. It's our
 property and our inheritance. We paid for it with our blood and
 our lives. And however far afield our leaders and judges may 
 wander, WE will keep that dream alive. 

 And that's why I'm proud to be an American.  And that's what our
 goofy candy-stripes and stars flag means to me when I see it
 flying - that Dream of ours is still alive.

........................................................................

                      'OL YELLER'S TWAT
               (aka The War Against Terrorism)

 Dear Jesus,
 
 Howdy pardner. It's your 'ol buddy Duhbya, leader of the Free
 World, come'n at ya. If your Heavenly Switchboard was a little
 busier than usual this week that's because I declared a 
 National Prayer Day. There ain't a day goes by I don't say to
 myself, "Duhb. The Lord's been good to you boy and you ought
 to count your blessins." And so I will.

 I thank you Lord for make'n me a White Man instead of a Nigra,
 slope-eyed Chinaman, a Ragheaded Packy or one of them there Jews. 
 And not just an ordinary White Man neither, no sir, but an All-
 American Texass White Man. YeeeHaaaa! Pardon my exuberance 
 Lord; I gess can't help myself sometimes.

 I thank you Lord for make'n me the son of a rich man. I been
 able to sit around on my fat ass all-day/ever-day for my entire
 life without ever have'n to do a lick 'o work. I got no end of
 fart-catchers and bum-boys kiss'n up to me every day of my
 useless life just a-pray'n to get their hands on some of Daddy's
 money. When I broke the law - why I never had to worry about no
 Cops, courts or jail. Hell no! Us rich folk in America live by 
 our own rules. When we went to war - why Daddy snuck the head of
 the state National Guard a few Bucks and I got to sit it out
 guarding the shores of Texas from heathen Commie Gooks. And 
 when I went to school - while all them poor boys studied their 
 asses off to make their grades, I was out get'n drunk, snort'n 
 Coke and Bang'n sorority gals like there was no tomorrow. Ain't 
 no way in hell any of them teacher fellas go'n to flunk a rich 
 boy no matter how stupid he is. Daddy would have the bastard
 fired. Good thing too or I'd a never made it outta third grade. 
 And when it finally came time for me to step out into the cold, 
 cruel world, why I had Daddy and his money right there to help 
 me get a leg up and catch me when I stumbled. Be'n a rich boy 
 means never need'n no brains or gumption. You pay other people 
 good money to take care of details like that. And, while lawyers 
 and accountants are a little pricey, judges are cheaper by the 
 dozen. Journalists and reporters? They come free.

 I thank you Lord for make'n me an American. I could have been
 born in some god-forsaken, poverty-ridden dirt-hole like most
 of humanity. But nope. You plunked me down in the land of Anything 
 For A Buck U.S.A. Only Commies, tree-huggers, troublemakers, 
 criminals and perverts need any of that subversive, pinko Bill-
 of-Rights/Constitution crap. Give me cold, crisp cash any day of 
 the week and I'll buy more freedom, liberty, judges, bureaucrats
 and politicians than you can shake a stick at.
 
 Finally, thank you Lord for make'n me a Christian instead of an
 Infidel Muslim bastard, Buddhist sissy, Christ-kill'n Jew Boy or 
 one them altar-boy Porking Catholics. Why any time I get into 
 trouble I just whip out my Bible and start a-quote'n chapter and 
 verse. You got an excuse in there for damn near everything. 
 I'll bet you used to be a lawyer afore you got into the God Biz. 
 And best of all - it's given me an endless supply of brainless, 
 vicious, superstitious hillbilly Trailer Trash for supporters. 
 Them people are dumb enough to fall for damn near ANY bullshit 
 you throw in front of them as long as you holler out a 'Praise 
 the Lord!' or 'God Bless America!' ever once in a while. They 
 got an endless appitite for the stuff Lord. They truely love 
 lose'n and I truely love take'n it away from them.

 So thank you Lord and keep 'er come'n.

 Your pal,

 Duhbya

 Oh BTW - You remember that "Jesusland" thing you and me talked 
          about a while back? It's get'n so close I can almost 
          smell it. Afore long them Jew Boys and Palestinians 
          will kill each other off leaving the Holy Land to its 
          rightful owners - the Christians. It might glow in the
          dark for a while before we can move in, but it'll be
          all ours. Might even make it an official state of these 
          United States.
          
                                   !

 After eight months of incarcerating tens of thousands of innocent
 American citizens and legitimate immigrants for nothing more than
 their religious and ethnic background; after compromising our
 Constitution and Bil of Rights out of existence; after utterly 
 decimating a tiny, starvation-ridden nation that had nothing 
 whatsoever to do with 9/11 and reducing its government to chaotic
 disorganization while torturing and killing thousands of its 
 completely innocent citizens both in-situ and thousands of miles 
 away in our CIA's digusting "Camp X" in Cuba; after initiating
 a SecCam/face-recognition/phone-tapping/email-snooping campaign 
 of fear and loathing across America, destroying many of the 
 freedoms our fathers and grandfathers fought and died for over 
 the centuries; we've arrived at a few conclusions about 9/11:

       * there is no internal terrorist conspiracy by 
         Muslim Americans or anyone else,
       * there is no organized international Muslim 
         extremist conspiracy against America worthy 
         of the name.
       * President Yellowbelly and his buddies not only
         very likely knew about the 9/11 attacks before
         hand but deliberately aided and abetted the 
         attackers.

 Yellowbelly's TWAT is pure bullshit. He made the whole thing up. 
 He thinks we're too stupid to know when we're getting schnookered. 
 He may be right.
 
.................................................................

                          DA MUTTS
 
 Geez what a bunch of dumb-asses! Da Mutts blew the easy part of 
 their schedule and now they're winning the hard part. Doh! It
 wouldn't matter much except the easy part's a lot bigger than the
 hard part. After whoop'n butt on the Numero Uno college team in
 the country - Stanford - they went on to whoop UC Berkeley and
 this weekend handed UCLA it's ass. How freak'n weird!

.....................................................................
  
                    -  MONDO VATICANO -

 Cardinal Bernie "The Pimp" Law slowly removed his soft, red kid 
 gloves, dropped the phony Nice Guy routine and got down to Dirty 
 Business this week. No more cute dodging/spinning; Bernie's now 
 gone into full Asshole Mode. Nobody swallowed his Mr. Clean act
 anyways except a few old ladies in the front pews. Not after Fr. 
 Geoghan and especially not after his slimebag buddy Fr. Shanley. 
 No way baby. They've got an altar boy following Bernie around 
 with a mop and pail nowadays to clean up the slime dripping off 
 him. Can't do much about the stink he gives off though.

 This week he unburdened his mind of the many heretofor secret 
 thoughts behind his actions in previous years. He thinks those 
 kids clearly seduced the innocent Fr. Geoghan and took unfair 
 advantage of the pious Fr. Shanley. No doubt in his mind about 
 it - the kids raped the priests, not the other way around. And 
 now those goddam Gold Diggers are out to bankrupt his Church 
 and smear his good name. Bernie really believes his own bullshit. 
 He really does. I think this experience has driven him mentally 
 insane. He ain't even vaguely in touch with reality any more. 
 No wonder JP-2 likes him - they're both operating on the same
 delusional wavelength.

 Whatever...the diocese backed out of the settlement Bernie
 promised to the victims of his pervert priests. Never trust
 any guy who wears a dress. Especially those sexy-look'n red
 ones.
 
			+	+	+

 Though it got little notice, many Boston area Catholic lay 
 leaders, concerned about the leadership void left by Bernie's 
 lack of moral authority, have begun organizing to fill it. 
 These aren't wild-eyed radicals. No sir. These are very 
 conservative, concerned people who are worried about the 
 practical welfare of their church. The kind of men and women 
 who have never voted anything but Republican ever in their 
 lives. 

 How effective have they been and how have they been received 
 by their fellow Catholics? They have been very effective and
 have been received warmly. They are in fact doing Bernie's 
 job now that he lacks the confidence of the Butts in the Pews. 
 Enough that both Bernie and the Vatican felt compelled to warn 
 all priests of the diocese of Boston to steer clear of them. 
 Ain't gonna work. The old days are gone forever Boyz. Since 
 Boston's priests have little incentive to feel that either 
 Bernie or the Vatican gives two hoots about their welfare, it's 
 unlikely they'll pay any attention to the warning. A clergy/laity
 coalition with control of the pursestrings could be VERY effective 
 and a powerful force for Good within the Church. It could also 
 become a powerful force for greed and bigotry. Depends on how 
 they go about it.

			+	+	+

 Bolstered by Future-Super-Saint JP-2's apparent disinterest in 
 the fate of the Basilica of the Nativity in Bethlehem, Israeli 
 soldiers went to work on 'Taliban-ing' it to get at a handful 
 of Palestians Nobodies who are sheltered inside. Being a little 
 too chickenshit to show up himself, the old Pollock sent someone 
 else to do his talking while he shuffled off to the safe confines 
 of Poland for a visit. Ain't no Jews left there to blow up Polish
 cathedrals. His daddy and grand daddy helped to kill them all off. 
 What a shame eh. Imagine the impact it would have if he, surrounded 
 by a gaggle of his Cardinals, were to process slowly across that
 Square to the Basilica to celebrate Mass. No way in hell those IDF 
 boys would have the balls to shoot them. It'd make Picture of the 
 Year. Too bad we got a gutless old man for a Pope.

			+	+	+

 Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chretien kind of surpised a few people
 this past week in a Liberal Party caucus meeting in Ottawa attended
 by all of his Party's MPs and Senators. He said the 'best decision'
 he ever made after 9/11 was to NOT have a priest speak at a memorial
 service on Parliment Hill for the victims of the terrorist attacks.
 He then aimlessly ranted on for about 10 minutes on the dangers of
 mixing religion and politics throwing in a special segment on the
 Catholic Church in particular. Being from formerly Catholic Quebec 
 where priests in the days of Premier Maurice Duplesis routinely
 used to disseminate government policy from their Sunday pulpits, 
 Jean apparently has a few bad memories of the Church. Many Catholic
 members of the caucus were duely shocked and upset by his comments.

			+	+	+

 The Catholics of Iraq dutifully said a special day of prayers to help
 celebrate President Saddam Hussein's 65th birthday this past week.
 Most of the Christians in Saddam's predominately Muslim nation are
 Catholics and the Church has dutifully bolstered his regime over
 the years in exchange for enough slack to operate openly without
 harassment. The Vatican has always gotten along well with dictators.

			+	+	+

 Fr. Eladio Ocana Serrano of the southern Spanish town of Nerja became 
 something of a movie star this week. Whatever he may lack in acting
 experience he, apparently, more than makes up for with his enthusiasm.
 Actually his former homosexual partner made public a video tape of the
 two boys go'n to it Bang'n one another with glee. Fr. Serrano quit
 shortly after the premier of his new movie and, being kind of a shy
 guy, 'retired' to a monastery to get back in touch with his Inner 
 Self and outta the public spotlight. Too bad. Him and Bishop Milingo 
 could have double-dated and maybe done a little 'wife swapping' 
 on the side.
 
			+	+	+

 Cardinal Anthony "Fat Tony" Bevilacqua in Philly mounted his high
 moral horse this past week with a blanket rejection of Queers in
 the priesthood. Apparently he wasn't offering free school credits
 to kids in Philly Catholic schools to form an Amen Chorus behind
 him like he has in the past with other issues when he made public
 statements. Used to be he'd hardly ever open his fat mouth without
 a choir of that sort behind him. His position is unequivocable:
 no Tootsies under any circumstances. Though he was understandably
 a bit vague about how he would go about detecting them. There is
 no reliable test. Only 2 of Fat Tony's 14 theologians supported his 
 Gay Bashing proposition. In fact, he's the only Bishop anywhere in
 America to come out with such a totally cement-headed stance. The 
 other Conservatives tend to hedge their bets allowing for the 
 equality of both gays and heterosexuals as long as they are firmly
 committed to celibacy. This also puts him in violation of the civil 
 law in a number of states. But not his own. Not yet anyways. Tony 
 don't want to talk about it either. It's a done thing far as he's 
 concerned. Besides, somebody might change his mind. 

--------------------------------------------------------
 The above is copyright material. You want to use it,
 ask. You want to make money off it, gimme some first.
 I'll let you know if it's enough. You want to steal it,
 I'll sic my lawyer Yoshi 'The Proctologist' Rasmussen
 on you baby. He'll teriyaki your sorry butt and turn
 it into Lutefisk.
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 MAIL:    tofoggymoment@yahoo.com
 ARCHIVE: https://www.angelfire.com/nb/afm
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