__
                    __ _ / _|_ __ ___
           _____   / _` | |_| '_ ` _ \   _____
          |_____| | (_| |  _| | | | | | |_____|
                   \__,_|_| |_| |_| |_|
                   Another Foggy Moment

 These are the continuing adventures of a typical resident
 of the self-proclaimed center of the Pugetopolis universe -
 Seattle. Most are true stories but some are made of whole-
 cloth. I ain't the Mayor, the Governor or a Big Shot. Just
 another Working Stiff with a Bad Attitude.

    ------------------------------------------------
    WARNING: This is not a Child-Proof Neighborhood.
    If you're a kid - scram!, beat it! you little
    punk before your Old Lady catches you and calls
    the cops. They'll throw you in the Big House in
    Walla Walla and won't let you out until you're
    89 years old. There. Don't say I didn't warn you.
    -------------------------------------------------

                        - 150 -

 That Annular Solar Eclipse tonight (Mon 6/10):
 starts - 5:02pm PDT
 max    - 6:03pm PDT      I assume you know how to find the Sun
 ends   - 7:00pm PDT	
 From the looks of things, it should make the Sun appear something
 like Pacman - a good chunk out of the SW quadrant. 
 WARNING: While only an idiot would stare at the Sun even under
 normal conditions, it's especially important that you resist
 the temptation during the eclipse. It can and will do nasty 
 things to your eyes. Don't even take a quick peek. 

 The Seattle Astronomical Society will have stuff set up for 
 viewing near the theater at the north end of Green Lake Park 
 and at Sunset Park. Grab a coffee and something to knosh on 
 at Green Lake's Urban Bakery after work and walk on over. 

 Now listen up. If you ever want to see the Sun again, this is
 what you must do. I'm about to spill the beans on astronomy's
 greatest secret - the Chicken Sacrifice. For centuries, astro
 geeks have employed it to assure clear skies. But because of
 it's esoteric nature and the danger of misinterpretation by
 ignorant laymen, all astro geeks have sworn a blood vow to
 keep it secret. In the wrong hands, it could easily turn moist,
 green and lovely places like our Northwest into blistering,
 barren hellholes like Arizona. We wouldn't want that, now
 would we. Iconoclast that I am, I've chosen to defy the Sacred
 Brotherhood. What the hell have they done for me lately?
 Bugger all.

 First off, get yourself a dead chicken - preferrably without
 the feathers. Vegans can use molded tofu if they like but the
 effect will be diminished. Marinate your chicken in Sacred
 Solar Sauce overnight if possible. I prefer Uncle Bubba's
 Possum Fixins but then it's custom made and I got connections.
 
 Just as the Sun first begins to disappear behind the shadow, 
 fire up your BBQ and get that charcoal glowing red hot. Then,
 at the crucial moment when the shadow maxs out the Sun, hold 
 your dripping, gooey chicken up with both hands as an offering 
 to the Sun God while chanting this refrain: "Mmmm Mmmm Finger
 Lick'n Good...Mmmm Mmmm Finger Lick'n Good" before placing
 your Sin Offering on your Altar of Immolation. That's your
 BBQ if you haven't guessed. This will lure the Sun God into 
 re-emerging to see what's cook'n. If all goes well, by the
 time your chicken's cooked, the Sun will be back out in all
 its glory and the Universe will be restored to it Proper 
 Order. Chow down. You earned it.

 Works every time. I've never had a single instance of an
 eclipse in which the Sun didn't come back out. It's also
 effective on other solar system objects. While somewhat
 less reliable for clearing cloudy skies, you do have the
 compensation of a delicious chicken dinner to ease your 
 disappointment. Waste not, want not.
 
                               *

 It was two years ago yesterday that retired Seattle University 
 prof Jacob Lawrence died. One of this nation's greatest Black
 painters, his brilliant and beautiful works depicting African-
 American history rocketed him out of obscurity in Harlem during
 the 30's and made him the first Black artist in America to get 
 real respectability. He became a tenured prof at SU in '71 and
 retired in 1986. He's missed by many.

 Ref: Daily Bleed

                           *
 Speaking of retired profs...

 DAY: 103

 Mr. Trummel's humble webpages remain up:
   Contracabal.net [Washington State version]
   Contracabal.org [International version]
 That can only mean that KingCo Inferior Court's Judge Jimmy 
 "The Token Twinkie" Doerty, hasn't yet succeeded in killing 
 Paul off. Even amongst the other bigots, Yahoos and low-life 
 on the Inferior Court bench, Jimmy kind of stands out - most 
 of the baliffs and janitors are more qualified to be a judge
 than he is. He's a little short on background and experience.

 Don't bother looking in the Times or P-I for news about
 Mr. Trummel. There ain't any. Never has been. Seattle
 Weekly is the only local rag keeping tabs on the situation.
 Otherwise you might try Wired magazine. They ran this 
 article about Paul a few days ago:
           Retiree Stuck in Netter's Prison
 And Cheryl over at Unknownnews.net ran another piece on
 his situation earlier in the week. If you want to know
 what's going on in Seattle don't bother with the local
 News Nazis. They ain't got a clue.

 June 17th is the Big Day. That's when Judge Jimmy skips
 his usual trip to the steam baths to briefly take another
 gander at Paul's case. The sassy, ancient and sickly Mr.
 Trummel with a history of serious heart and prostrate
 problems, has now also acquired TB thanks to KingCo Jail.
 That filthy dump breeds the stuff. Needless to say, KingCo
 doesn't hold itself to the same health standards it does
 you and I. And to top it all off, Judge Jimmy has now 
 put him in Solitary Confinement - the most physically and 
 emotionally severe form of imprisonment allowed under the
 law. It's normally reserved for the most violent and
 recalcitrant prisoners, not retired old U Dub Journalism
 profs. Judge Jimmy has wandered off into the judicial
 Twilight Zone. The punishment bears little resemblance
 to the crime.

 Joe Harkins of the National Writers Union and United Auto
 Workers is picking up the slack that our News Nazis have
 left. He has established an informational webpage dedicated 
 to freeing Paul. It's at:

              Freepaultrummel.com

 Judge Jimmy's email address is:

            james.doerty@metrokc.gov

 By most accounts, he's both computer and Net illiterate. 
 He don't know how to work e-mail. So don't be expecting
 a reply let alone an acknowledgement. But just so he'll 
 have to lie to say he got no complaints, give him Joe
 Welch's great line from the McCarthy Hearings: "Have you
 no decency, sir?" It's worth a try.

                            *

 Speaking of 'abject journalistic suck-ups'...

 How about that dumbass Bimbo at KIRO who called around to 
 the grieving families and friends of people who recently died.
 One of their much-awarded Star Reporters, she fished back
 through the obitutary columns digging up names attached to
 bodies. She was trying to figure out whose ashes got plunked 
 on the roof of Butt-Ugly Field a while back. Imagine getting 
 a call from KIRO about your old dad/ma/uncle/aunt/whatever 
 inquiring as to whether they were Mariners fans and what you 
 did with their leftovers! Here you thought you had all that
 behind you and could get on with your life and out of the
 blue, some smug jerk from KIRO calls accusing you of being
 the Ash Dumper. You'd think a Big Shot Reporter like her 
 would have the clout and chutzpah to tell her PD where he 
 could stick a dumbass idea like that. Nope. She's a Good 
 Girl. She does whatever Daddy tells her to do. I'll bet 
 she's a blonde eh.
 
                              *

 Baseball draft...

 It was a study in contrasts. On the one hand, there were the
 Purple Puppies of U Dub whose highest pick was an 8th rounder
 and #237th overall (Tyler Davidson). One the other hand, there
 was the University of British Columbia whose highest pick was
 a 1st rounder and #9 overall. Just to rub it in, another 1st
 rounder and #4 pick overall was a kid from Vancouver's suburb
 of Surrey! It says a lot about the quality of our baseball
 program. Despite enormous resources, no end of freeloaders
 piling on and the challenge of Pac10 competition, we fail to 
 even come close to a place where they have a minimal program,
 no freeloaders, few resources and only mediocre competition. 
 It must be the kids fault eh. Gotta be. 

 Speaking of Canuks...

 One of the delights of Vancouver (BC) is Stanley Park. It's 
 a part of the downtown area that has been preserved in its 
 original, primordial grandeur. You can literally walk a few
 blocks from the urban canyons of the core and be in a natural
 forest. Seattle doesn't have anything vaguely like it. Nor 
 does Hooterville have any beaches worthy of the name (aside 
 from that tiny dump on Alkai Point) while Vancouver boasts 
 a ring of many large and beautiful beaches around English Bay.
 It makes Seattle look like what it is - an ugly dirt hole.

 This past week, a young Korean lady who was jogging in Stanley
 Park was viciously attacked and beaten very nearly to death.
 Though she's hanging in there, the sort of brain damage she
 suffered is so profound it normally results in death. Despite
 its reputation, Vancouver is a VERY violent city. I'd say it's
 worse than Seattle in that respect. This lady's family back in  
 Korea were also in shock over this as you might expect. But 
 they have made an odd request of Vancouverites.

 They are asking that someone legally adopt their daughter.
 The reason given by the family is a curious one: if their
 daughter survives, she will likely be severely brain-damaged
 and there is such significant social stigma attached to the
 mentally-disabled in Korea that the parents fear she would 
 suffer further if brought home. That fear was obviously
 substantial enough that they risked the public embarassment 
 of making such a controversial request to the people of a 
 foreign nation. Like us, Koreans are very proud people. Can 
 you imagine an American making such a request of the people 
 of say Singapore or Nigeria? Me neither.

 BTW - Canada helps cover the cost of foreign nationals who
       have to retrieve sick/injured/dead family members. We
       don't of course.

                              *

 Ever since that story came out about how the Pakistanis 
 don't have much of a clue as to what a nuclear bomb really
 is, there have been no end of News Nazis bigots and other
 Media Morons goof'n 'em. "Ha! Ha! Look at them stupid 
 Ragheads. They ain't gonna know what hit when the nukes 
 fly.", is the general line. 

 Fact is, none of the jackasses pushing this line is any
 smarter than the Pakistanis they're making fun of. They
 universally have this fantasy that nukes are completely 
 a local event with few, if any, consequences for the rest
 of us. Oh, maybe if the wind is blowing the wrong way,
 we might get a little radioactive fallout, but that's
 it. Clue. Anybody who says anything like that is a retard. 
 They got their head up their ass. They don't know what 
 they're talking about.

 There is only one reason Ronny Ray-gun, notorious Lap 
 Boy to the Military-Industrial Complex, signed a nuke
 disarmament treaty with the Rooskies back in the 80's. 
 It was because both our own and the Soviet's physicists 
 were able to demonstrate to Ron & Gorby that even a 
 limited nuclear exchange would in effect be an act of 
 suicide for both sides and have devistating global
 effects.

 Aside from the local damage and the radioactive fallout, 
 it would trigger a Nuclear Winter scenario. When a nuke 
 goes off, it generates temperatures in excess of those at 
 the center of our Sun. Think for a second. The Sun is 92 
 million miles away, and yet we can feel its heat. Need I 
 say, this is Serious Heat. Far greater than that generated 
 by Saddam's oil fires in Kuwait. Millions of tons of debris 
 is rocketed at high speed far up into the atmosphere where 
 it is dispersed by the upper air winds instead of falling 
 back down to the ground. This ain't smoke like Saddam's 
 fires, this is big stuff. Over time, it gradually becomes 
 evenly dispersed with most it remaining in circulation for 
 many years while the rest gradually seeds cloud formation
 as it sifts down.

 Things get complicated from there. But basically, this stuff
 blocks off incoming sunlight. The temperatures drop. Without 
 sunlight and with significantly diminished temperatures, crops 
 don't grow. Neither we nor our cattle have anything to eat.
 The algae in the ocean don't produce oxygen. While the extent
 of this effect is determined by the scale of the attack, the
 threshold is very low. An all-out exchange between India and
 Pakistan would be plenty. And as far as Ma Nature is concerned,
 she don't care who pulled the trigger.

 The more general scenario that Nuclear Winter is part of, is
 not just theoretical mumbo-jumbo. Volcanic eruptions have
 produced similar effects that have lasted for decades. Think
 of each nuke as a super-volcano and you get closer to the
 idea. It would be like having hundreds, maybe thousands, of
 mega-volcanos blasting off all at the same time. It's highly
 unlikely only India and Pakistan will be nuking. This theory
 is also thought to explain radical climate shifts that have
 occurred in the far distant past by comet/meteorite impacts. 

 Bucky Fuller had one of the best analogies of our situation. 
 He said it's like we're on this spaceship. But instead of 
 having one Captain, it's got 200 of them. They're all crowded 
 onto the bridge. Many of them are carrying loaded pistols and 
 hand-grenades. A few of them have belt-bombs around their 
 waists. And they all want to be in charge and they're all 
 willing to blow the whole ship up to get control. We've 
 survived largely through luck so far. Our luck may be about
 to run out. Say goodbye to your kids. You just stole their
 future.

...............................................................

 "It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand.
  I beat people up."
                      
                     - Muhammed Ali -
...............................................................

                       THE NEIGHBOR

 I had a neighbor a couple years ago who was a professional
 who suffered a stroke. We weren't close friends or nothing -
 just friends is all. While his stroke didn't cripple him, 
 it left him very weak - he was exhausted after walking just 
 a couple blocks. And it seriously diminished his mental 
 capacity. He couldn't concentrate on anything any more. 
 Couldn't read a book. Couldn't follow the plot line on a 
 TV show. Working for a living was no longer an option. He 
 was both physically and mentally incapable of it. This 
 reduced him to a disability check to live on. Most of his
 savings evaporated in the medical bills. All his old 
 friends and workmates drifted away. It's surprising how
 quickly a man's life can evaporate. Money is the measure
 of all things in America - you got none, you're Nobody.

 Needing help and being vaguely Jewish, he signed up with a
 Jewish help agency. They promised to help him find a more
 affordable place to live and to manage his money for him.
 It cost him $40/month for their services. That's a lot of
 money for somebody on a disability check. But he knew he
 wasn't up to taking care of things himself anymore. And he
 figured, since they were a religious group, they'd be more
 reliable and more likely to take a personal interest than
 a government agency would. That attitude didn't last long.

 The place they found him was a grubby little room in an old
 dump of a house. One of the agency's 'patrons' properties
 no doubt. He hated the place - it was old, dirty and run
 down. It bummed him out being there. But he couldn't handle 
 looking for a place on his own and he didn't have much money
 to work with. So, with a little help from his friends, he 
 registered with Seattle Housing to get on their very long 
 waiting list for subsidized housing, and hunkered down to 
 ride out the wait in this dump he was now living in. It 
 would take two years.

 He had a hard time adjusting to this new regime. He felt 
 pretty isolated and spent his day cooped up in his little 
 room. He kept the TV on for background noise. He was bored 
 out of his gourd. But he tried to make the best of it. The 
 agency sent a cute little social-worker around to see him 
 every once in a while to make sure he was taking care of 
 himself: eating properly, keeping his clothes clean, making 
 his bed, etc. At first he was very conscienious about those 
 things and made a great effort to maintain his old standards.
 While he was far from a dandy before, he certainly wasn't a
 slob neither. Often, him and his cute worker would go out to 
 a restaurant for a bite to eat or take a short ride. He liked
 that a great deal. It was almost like things were briefly 
 'normal' again. 

 But then some of the bums living in this place found out he 
 had a few bucks. They started hitting on him for beer money, 
 smokes, whatever they could squeeze out of him. He was lonely 
 and they were the only company he had. He tried to accomodate 
 them. In return they became his 'buddies'. As long as he was 
 paying for the beer and providing the smokes, they'd happily 
 come up to visit him and listen to him chatter away. No beer? 
 no smokes? Sorry, no time. Hold out on them and they'd start 
 to get nasty.

 He told me of how once one of them found enough money to get 
 a Hooker off The Ave - one of the little Ave Rat girlies. The 
 Ave Rats are this sort of nomadic tribe of run-away kids who 
 wander up and down the coast. Kurt Colbain from Nirvana was an 
 Ave Rat of sorts. The U District's "Ave" was their local hang 
 out. This guy had his Ratette peel a little and let his buddies 
 stick their heads in the door for a peek - in exchange for a
 couple Bucks. Just so they'd remember what a woman looks like. 
 Figuring she was on her own and pretty helpless, he of course 
 planned on stiffing her when it came time to pay. He was a bum. 
 He didn't have much money. But the joke was on him. She wouldn't 
 do nothing until she got her money up front. Being pretty Hot 
 to Trot, he paid. She took off like a big bird. That's when he 
 discovered she had friends. They were waiting outside the door 
 for him. They relieved him of his assets, his ass and a few 
 other things. No point in calling the Cops eh. They'd just 
 laugh at him. The Ave Rats were well known for fleecing the 
 old perverts around here. More than a few U Dub profs in search 
 of Young Love got the same treatment.
 
 If my neighbor held back to save up for something he wanted 
 to buy, the Boyz leaned on him and told him to pony up or they 
 wouldn't be his 'buddies' no more. He started hitting the beer 
 pretty heavy too on account of his new friends. He never used 
 to drink at all. Maybe some wine with dinner at a restaurant - 
 max. Everytime I'd drop by to see him, he'd always have a couple 
 half-empty big quart bottles on his desk and the place started 
 looking and smelling pretty shabby. Smoked like a chimney too. 
 The boredom was the worst of it - no place to go, nobody to
 see, nothing to do and no money to do it with. He was losing 
 it. But he insisted he would be okay.

 Instead of helping him out with the situation they put him 
 in, the nice ladies at the agency wrote him off as a lost cause.
 They ragged on him about how messy his little room was and how
 dirty he looked, how his breath smelled like stale beer and 
 how he smoked too much. They no longer had time to go out for 
 a bite to eat or a ride anymore. The visits, which he used to 
 look forward to, now became unpleasant. He dumped them. I guess 
 he figured he was better off spending the $40/month on beer. 
 The friends he got with that were less demanding, much more 
 forgiving and a lot more predictable. Paying somebody to add 
 to your misery didn't make a lot of sense either. He needed 
 help, he didn't need misery. He already had plenty of that.

 A year and change later, just when he'd about given up on ever
 being able to escape, he got good news. Seattle Housing said 
 he was near the top of the list and they had a couple nice 
 places lined up for him. It wouldn't be long now. This boosted 
 his spirits considerably. Finally - a chance at something better.

 He underwent a surprising transformation. He stopped drinking,
 blew off his bum buddies and decided to be a Jew again. He never 
 said why he decided to do this. While his parents were Jewish, 
 giving him the necessary credentials, they weren't practicing 
 Jews. Quite the opposite. He said they were dead against all 
 that religious Mojo and brought their kids up the same way.
 But somehow this Jewish thing of his stuck in his mind and he
 was quietly proud of it. He kept it at arms length but he didn't
 just drop it. It meant something to him but I doubt if even he 
 knew quite what. 

 I encouraged him. Damn! He needed SOMETHING besides beer in the
 middle of his life. Coming from a Catholic, he found this most
 peculiar. "You like Jews so much, why don't you become a Jew
 too?", he says. I explained to him that your better off going
 with what you got. I was born a Catholic, it's a great tradition
 so it makes sense I stick with being a Catholic. He was born a
 Jew, it's a terrific tradition so it makes since he sticks with
 being a Jew. It all points in the same direction anyways. He 
 liked that. Good thing too - I didn't know what the hell I was 
 talking about. It just came off the top of my head.

 He had already found himself a Rabbi and started learning how 
 to be a Jew. He wasn't fanatical about it. He was just looking 
 for an anchor in the storm his life had become. He wanted a 
 place to belong to, people to be with, something to be part
 of. Something clean and decent. He found it there. If he 
 finds something more, more power to him. I was happy for him.

 I haven't seen him for about a year now, but last I knew he had
 a nice apartment in one of Seattle Housing's projects and almost
 had his "Shema Yisrael" down. The effort it took to learn some
 Hebrew and the other things needed to become a Jew greatly 
 improved his concentration. He was getting some of his intellectual
 abilities back and walking around more now that he had some place 
 to go, people to see and things to do. He looked happy and his 
 life had a new sense of purpose. But he literally had to lose 
 everything before he found what he really needed all along. 
 Stuff happens like that sometimes. 
  
.....................................................................

                      'OL YELLER'S TWAT
               (aka The War Against Terrorism)

 Acting on a tip-off from an anonymous White House informer, 
 a joint Homeland-Security/FBI/BATF/Secret-Service SWAT team 
 raided the home of famous American daredevil exhibitionist 
 Evil bin Knievel this week. "Anybody with a name like that 
 has GOT to be an Al Qaida", said an FBI spokesperson. Asked 
 for comment, President Yellowbelly began yelling, "He's EVIL! 
 He's EVIL!" Denied an attorney, Mr. bin Knievel is being held 
 incommunicado in a Dirt Cage at an undisclosed Federal facility 
 in the Arizona desert. His agent, Mr. Elvis "Rattlesnake" 
 Schmelvis, announced his intention to have his client's name 
 changed to "Just Plain Bob Smith" as soon as the courthouse 
 opens tomorrow. "It's just a name dang it all anyways. He's 
 a Good 'Ol Boy. He aint really evil. And where in the hell 
 that 'bin' come from?", was Rattlesnake's tearful comment.

 The strain is starting to show on Yellowbelly. Our News Nazis
 kept it under wraps, but many Euro reporters were amazed at
 how goofy our Executive coon-ass hillbilly was acting during 
 the French leg of his trip after a well-libricated reception 
 the previous night. Choking on peanuts again no doubt - hit'n 
 the Sauce. His no-booze schtick is as phony as the rest
 of him. Like they say at AA: once a drunk, always a drunk.

 His daddy took a couple years to fall apart. Yeller's doing
 it in record short time. With the November elections looming
 ever closer and his Party's hold on the House at stake, the
 enormous slack the American people gave him in the wake of
 9/11 has been all but completely hauled in. The 50% that were
 a-gin him are a-gin once again. With over half the country 
 now convinced he knew in advance about the 9/11 attacks and 
 either deliberately or incompetently failed to respond to the 
 clues; with his approval rating steadily sliding ever further 
 down, he's quickly losing it. 

 Regardless of what the Euros or anybody else thinks, he's going 
 to HAVE to play his Iraq Invasion card this fall. It's his only
 hope to recoup his political losses. The consequences for us, 
 for that region of the world and for the world at large will be
 disasterous. Worse, it ain't gonna do him a bit of good. We're
 wise to him now. Just like we got wise to his Daddy.

 Hard to believe only a couple years ago we were riding the
 crest of an economic boom with the sky as our only limit. 
 And, as happened so often in the past, we reached deep down 
 to find a way to blow it all. This was what the pre-Vietnam 
 60's were like - good times gone bad. The deep nastiness 
 of asassinations/riots/social-upheaval that came later in 
 those times is yet to come. We haven't yet begun to experience
 the full economic and social consequences of this past year. 
 It'll get pretty Hairy when we do. Bad Moon a-rise'n.

 .................................................................

                          Canon 290

 After it has been validly received, sacred ordination never 
 becomes invalid.                                      ^^^^^

 from: Roman Catholic Code of Canon Law
....................................................................

                    -  MONDO VATICANO -

 CAT FIGHT IN THE VATICAN! Wow! Who would ever have believed
 it possible? Cardinal "Ratso" Ratzinger, JP-2's Teutonic
 Terror as head of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the 
 Faith - aka The Inquistion - has reigned for over a decade 
 as Minister of Doctrinal Purity and unofficial Vice-Pope. 
 He's got the dirt on EVERYBODY. He knows where all all the 
 Queers are hiding and can likely rattle off from memory the 
 names and addresses of every kid/nun/dog/cat/horse who's 
 ever been Porked by a priest anywhere in the world in the
 past century. Anyone screws around with Ratso they end up 
 singing castrato in the Vatican Choir. He's the J. Edgar
 Hoover of Roma. No one has ever dared to challenge him.

 Until now. With Future-Super-Saint JP-2 off on an eternal
 tour of the solar system, the pouty and ever so bitchy 
 Twinkie who pushes around his wheelchair, Navarro-Valls,
 has taken full advantage of his strategic postition to 
 make a power-play for Vice-Pope! This clown doesn't even
 use an ecclesiastic title like Father or Monsignor or
 whatever. He's just Navarro-Valls. It's just a wild guess
 on my part, but I'd say he's 100% Opus Dei. Those fascist
 thugs have been JP-2's unofficial body-guards since Day
 One. If it weren't for them, the Curia Queens would have
 nailed him with one of their Magic Pillows ages ago. 
 The ODs permeate the Vatican's bureaucracy like a fine 
 mist. They're everywhere.

 The battleground for this showdown between the Twinkie
 and the Inquisitor is JP-2's future. The old Pollock has
 become an embarassment. Suffering serious brain-rot and
 physically reduced to a pathetic visage, Ratso wants him 
 outta there. Even arranged to have him shuffled off to
 some nice Old Popes Home in Poland in August. The Church 
 has BIG problems to deal with. Forget the Sacraments -
 we're talking BILLIONS of Bucks. It needs a living Pope 
 not some shuffling Zombie like JP-2. But the Opus Dei 
 thugs are standing by their man and insisting that he 
 stays put until he croaks. Their influence evaporates as 
 soon as JP-2 is out the door. The Twinkie is their Front
 Man in this little Turf War. 

 This could get interesting. There are no 'progressives' 
 in the Vatican. Those, like Brazilian Fr. Leonardo Boff,
 who weren't flushed out of the Church, have been bludgeoned
 into submission - like Bishop Belasuriya. There are only
 fascists and conservatives in Roma. Time for everybody to 
 take sides. They better step on it. The Church is rapidly 
 going down the toilet and the Pollock ain't long for this 
 world with or without a respirator.

			+	+ 

 The American Bishops are warming up for their little 
 conference in Dallas on the 13th amidst the ever growing 
 pervert priest scandal. At least those that aren't under 
 indictment or scheduled for deposition anyways. They 
 tried to flog some sort of "first-one-is-free" notion for 
 pervert priests and now seem to have settled on an even 
 more bizarre "two-strikes" plan! What freak'n planet do 
 these clowns come from? 

 Is it just me, or does anyone else find it a bit strange 
 that these idiots are sitting around talking about whether 
 or not to aid and abet a felony assault on children? In 
 itself it constitutes conspiracy to obstruct justice. Who 
 do they imagine is going to pay for their forgiveness in 
 the subsequent lawsuits? Certainly not them. And just whose 
 kids are the Bishops going to 'volunteer' for the forgiven 
 'first and second strikes'? Their own? Of course not. They
 ain't got any. They're going to use yours.

 A reckoning of sort is coming. The clergy may call the shots
 in the Church but we pay the bills. If we were to stop even
 temporarily and the Bishops had to pay their own mortgages, 
 you can bet their attitudes would change radically. These 
 jerks have serverely abused our trust and faith in them. 
 They've lied to us, used our children for their sexual 
 gratification and taken us completely for granted. It ain't 
 gonna stay that way much longer. They better watch their 
 asses. WE are the Church, not they. Says so right there 
 in the Bible.

                              *
 
 Fr. Andrew Greeley in Chicago is a bit of loose cannon. Aside
 from writing a popular regular column in the Trib, he cranks 
 out a lot of harlequin-esque romantic novels with Catholic 
 themes. Nothing too risque or of any particular profundity 
 but good enough to keep those royalty checks rolling in. He's 
 gotten into luke-warm water with the Vatican occasionally over 
 his views - particularily on the Church's teachings relating
 to sex and birth control. But again, he's a sociologist 
 by training and not a theologian, so he's not a real threat.
 Besides, he ain't the kind of the guy who would stick his
 neck out for reasons of conscience. He knows when to kiss 
 butt. Without that collar, he's Mr. Nobody.

 Donning his sociology hat, he released the results of one of
 his surveys this past week and paid a few Vatican dues at
 the same time. The topic was the burning issue of widespread
 anti-Catholic sentiment, prejudices and discrimination in 
 America. That's strange. I've been a Catholic all my life 
 and I've never run into any. Nonetheless, Fr. Greeley insists 
 that his fellow Americans continue to cling tenaciously to 
 such dog-eared cliches as:
 * Catholics do what the Pope and Bishops tell them to do
   (75% believed it so);
 * Catholics idolize and worship the statues and images in
   their churches (57% thought so);
 * Catholics worship the Blessed Virgin Mary and the saints
   as much as God (83% thought it true).
 Fortunately he didn't direct the same questions to Catholics
 or he may have embarassingly found that they too cling
 tenaciously to such dog-eared cliches.

 Fr. Greeley attributed these perceptions not to ignorance 
 of Catholic doctrine but rather to a deep-seated bigotry 
 Americans hold for Catholics. Lacking any actual data to 
 substantiate that view, it is obvious he has a little 
 problem keeping his own bigotry out of his pseudo-scientific 
 analysis. In the academic world, sociology is like journalism 
 and psychology - Phys Ed for Pink Boys. Pretty much impossible 
 to flunk.

 Many Catholics, unable or unwilling to distinguish between
 the institutional Church embodied in the Vatican, and the
 real Church embodied in the family of God's people, are 
 taking this pervert priest scandal VERY personally. Despite 
 clear and ample evidence that much of the institutional 
 church is rotten and morally corrupt to the core - in 
 desperate need of a thorough house-cleaning - these lay 
 Catholics insist that its really all just a conspiracy 
 against the Church. An attitude that the Bishops and many 
 clergy strongly encourage. It gets them off the hook. It
 takes the focus off their corruption and perversity and
 redirects it elsewhere: gays, women, liberals, News Nazis, 
 Evil Protestants/Jews/Muslims/Buddhists, etc. etc. 

 In this extraordinary time when when the Church should be
 seeking atonement for its sins with humility, honesty and 
 candidness, it is instead being encouraged by guys like
 Fr. Greeley to pursue arrogance, self-pity and a false
 sense of persecution. How Christian of him. He ain't part
 of the solution, he's part of the problem. He ought to 
 shut up and get a clue.

 BTW - A CNN/USA-TODAY/GALLOP poll of U.S. Catholics this
 week produced the following results:
 77%   say dump ANY priest guilty of abusing a young
       person in the past;
 75%   say the Church has done a bad job of dealing
       with its pervert priests (this is after the
       Bishops Dog & Pony Show in Roma);
 87%   say the Pope should fire any cardinal or bishop
       who knowingly transferred a pervert to another
       parish and failed to notify the police
 Sheesh! Even Catholics are turning into anti-Catholic
 bigots these days. Rarely has there ever been this huge
 a rift between the ecclesiastical hierarchy and the
 Butts In The Pews.

----------------------------------------------------
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 it into Lutefisk.
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