As the morning breaks, Emma races to the local church to discuss her latest perdicerment with her former Spice Girl pal turned minister, Geri. "Good morrow....what do I call you now?"

"Emma! You're still in your clothes from last night! Did you not ever go home?"

*"The last is true. The sweeter rest was mine."

Geri was puzzled by her awkward behavior, but played along. "Were you with J.C.?"

*"With J.C.? No. I have forget that name and that name's woe."

"I knew it wouldn't take you long. It never does. So, where have you been then?"

"I have been with mine enemy!"

"Be plain, dear blonde."

"*Then plainly know my heart's dear love is set, on the fair Backstreet blonde that I have met. This is all I pray, that thou consent to marry us today."

Geri is taken off guard. *"Holy Saint Francis! What happened between last night and this morning? Is J.C., the one you stalked profusely, so soon forgotten? A Spice Girl's love then lies not truly in their hearts, but in their eyes. No wonder I decided to leave!"

*"I pray thee chide me not. Him I love now doth grace for grace and love for love allow. The other did not so."

"Nick feels the same way then?"

*"I pray thee chide me not."

"That's not really answering my question, but oh well. I'll be an assistant since one thing may come of this. May it turn the world of hate for pop music groups to pure love."

*"O, let us hence! I stand on sudden haste." She turns to leave and trips over the baptismal fountain.

"You clutz."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At the beach all the Backstreet Boys, minus Nick, are goofing around. We see Brian at a payphone.

"Where in the hell is Nick?" asked AJ.

"Not at his house. I just spoke to his dad." said Brian.

"Hey, you guys!" yelled Nick, running onto the beach. "I've got a big problem!"

"Yea, you weren't here on time!" chimed in Kevin.

"Look, you guys remember that Emma chick from the party last night?"

"Yea?" they all said in unison.

"Well, she came to my house last night and wouldn't leave until I accepted her invitation for a date. What do I do now? I can't stand the girl!"

"So, just don't show," said AJ.

Nick sat there, contemplating for a moment, then shook his head in agreement. "Sounds simple enough. Okay, what do you guys wanna do tonight?"

"Hang low at Howie's house. No one knows where that's at cause no one cares," said AJ.

"Hey! People care! I just got the skillz to keep it on the down low!"

"Whatever, Latin lover boy. Let's just go get some films, order a pizza and call it a night.

Out of nowhere, a corvet containing the members of N'Sync pull up and block the boys' way. J.C. makes his way over to the group. *"Gentlemen, good day. A word with one of you." (Now we know where Emma got it from....or maybe she taught J.C.)

"You wanna talk with one of us. Get outta here!" laughed AJ.

*"AJ, thou consortest with Nick."

"Consort? What the hell are you talking about?"

*"Well sir, you're not my man. He is," J.C. said, pointing to Nick.

"I'm not your man!" screeched Nick.

*"Nick, the love I bear thee can afford nor better term than this." J.C. backs up and does a couple of Karate kicks. *"Thou art a villian!"

"Look, man, I know we made it in the U.S. before you and that we've sold more albums than you...." J.C. lunges forward and punches Nick. "What the hell? Are you nuts?"

*"Boy, this shall not excuse the injuries that thou hast done me!"

"I didn't do a damn thing to you!"

J.C. lets out a huge sigh of confusion. "You've taken my only love! You've taken Emma!"

"Emma? I don't want Emma, you wannabe pimp daddy! She came onto me! You can have her! You can be the one to meet her at Hard Rock tonight!"

"Man, lose the weird language shit and pull yourself together," said AJ, helping Nick up off the ground. "If ya don't, we're really gonna kick your asses on the charts since you'll be in an asylum."

"Really, man," said Brian. "We don't even like the Spice Girls." With that, they started walking away.

"Turn and draw!" yelled J.C.

"Screw off, man!" Kevin yelled back.

"Turn and....oh hell. Might as well go see Emma."

* = Either some or all of the text was taken from "William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet"

© 1999 Adonis