Now is the time to do something about relapse before it is a reality. As long as our desire to not use alcohol or drugs is greater than our desire to use these substances, we will not use! However we must use the help of a twelve step program such as AA or NA. Thinking that we can stop going to meetings and don't need the help of our support people and sponsor's in the programs any longer, is a sure way of returning to our old ways of thinking
I have been in recovery now for several years now, and having worked in the field of recovery have ask many a relapser with as many as 27 years clean and sober what had happened that was so bad and had made them want to return to their old ways of using? The answers to this question is often "I don't know." Life was going good I had my family back, just been promoted at work, children are out of school now and doing great on their own. I really did not have an excuse I just found my self at a bar having what I thought was a well deserved drink. The next thing that I knew was waking up here in detox, and had lost all that I had accomplished and worked so hard for in the past years.
This is a common situation in recovery. We get to thinking that after a period of not using that we may not be an alholic/addict. After all had I not put my life back in order. I had been thinking that I had licked this disease and could drink as a normal person now.
Knowing that we have a fatal disease what can we do to prevent relapse? First I want to remember my very first drink, how it made me feel. That good fuzzy feeling and being a part of instead of an outsider. The fun and companionship. And the very last drink which had produced complete emotional, spiritual, and mental desolation. Divorce, DWI's isolation of my children, money and legal problems. Not everyone is going to hit the same bottom the list could go on and on. Add your own losses. Once we lost control we can never go back to that good fuzzy feeling that the first drink produced. We can and will however reach a lower bottom than when we had quit using alcohol and drugs, should we ever forget where our drinking and using had taken us.
The program of recovery teaches us that there will come a time and place that no amount of self-will, no person and no knowledge of this disease will be enough to keep us from taking the next drink. The only thing we have to help us at this time is our spiritual conditioning, prayer and with help from our Higher Power. I personally do not know of a person that has relapsed while praying to God to take this obsession of drink away, and then calling on someone in the program of recovery and asking for help. We must build on our program while things are going good in recovery. Building up a strong relationship with our companions in the program. Going to meetings, service work and working with other alcoholics and addicts. Always being honest and open to new changes always moving ahead in our growth and development toward a spiritual
goal. Remembering that we claim spiritual growth not spiritual perfection. Don't be too hard on yourself we all make mistakes. Just remember we must make positive corrections when we discover these mistakes. Be grateful when you see others relapse. Grateful that it was not you. Thank GOD!
H--Hungry:
Anger will cause you to drink more quickly than any other emotion that you may or will have. AA's Big Book states that "resentments are our number one offender" Anger Justified or not is normal to all people, but we must remember that our goal to remain sober and to do that we can not harbor resentments (refelt anger) and there for we must make amends and forgive others for by doing so will make peace for us, does not make any difference what the other person accepts or rejects us as long as we have cleaned our side of the street.
We all need companionship. When we were using and needed people we found companionship in people that were using and drinking as we did or we isolated. Being alone we did not have to share! Or these friends finally had enough of our behaviors and never came around again. Now that I am sober I have found new friends mostly in the program of recovery. These are true friends that love me for who I am not because of what I have, don't have or can give them. Friends that I can count on day or night who have a sincere desire to listen and be of help, and most importantly they can count on me.
