Other stuff!
Some People are Like Potatoes!
1. Some people never seem to be motivated to participate. They are content
to watch while others do. They are "Speck Tators."
2. Some people never do anything to help, but they are gifted at finding
fault with the way others do things. They might be called "Comment
Taters."
3. Some people are always looking for ways to cause problems. They look or
others to agree with them. You call them "Aggie Taters."
4. Then there are those who always say they will, but somehow never get
around to doing anything. They are "Hezzie Taters."
5. Some people put on a front and act like they are someone they are not.
They are "Emma Taters."
6. Still, there are those who live what they talk. They are always prepared
to stop what they are doing to lend a hand. They bring real sunshine
into others' lives. You might call them "Sweet Taters."
One of my favorite Blone Jokes (sorry if your a blond... NO OFFENCE!!!)
A blonde dials 911 to report that her car has been broken into. She is
hysterical as she explains her situation to the dispatcher. "They've stolen
the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, and even the
accelerator!" she cries.
The 911 dispatcher says, "Stay calm. An officer is on the way. He will be
there in two minutes."
Before the police get to the crime scene, however, the 911 dispatcher's
telephone rings a second time, and the same blonde is on the line again.
"Never mind," giggles the blonde, "I got in the back seat by mistake."
A teacher asked her 2nd grade class to
fill in the blanks. This is what they wrote...:
Better to be safe than......Punch a 5th grader
Strike while the ..........Bug is close
It's always darkest before.....Daylight Savings Time
Never underestimate the power of....Termites
You can lead a horse to water but........how?
Don't bite the hand that........looks dirty
No news is...............impossible
A miss is as good as a.........Mr.
If you lie down with dogs, you'll....stink in the morning
The pen is mightier than the............pigs
An idle mind is...........The best way to relax
Where there's smoke there's.........pollution
Happy the bride who...........gets all the presents
A penny saved is...............not much
Two's company, three's..........the Musketeers
Children should be seen and not...spanked or grounded
If at first you don't succeed.....get new batteries
You get out of something what you..see pictured on the
box When the blind leadeth the blind......get out of the way
Laugh & the whole world laughs w/you,cry and....you have to blow your nose.
Here are a few things I think you might like. If you don't, well, you don't
Lessons Learned In Life
(author unknown)
-No matter how much you care, some people just don't care back.
-No matter how good a person is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while, and you must forgive them for that.
-Money is a lousy way of keeping score.
-Talking can ease emotional pains.
-It takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.
-True friendship can continue to grow, even over the longest distance. -You can do something in an instant that will give you a heartache or life.
-It's not what you have in your life, but who you have in your life.
-Good friends are family members whom we are allowed to choose.
-We don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
-Leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.
-Our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for ourselves.
-No matter how thin you slice it, there are always two sides.
-It takes a long time to become the person you want to be.
-It's a lot easier to react than it is to think.
-You can keep going long after you think you cannot.
-Either you control your attitude, or it controls you.
-Patience takes a lot of practice.
-There are people who love you dearly, but just don't know how to show it. -Your best friend and you can do anything or nothing and have the best time.
-Sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up.
-There is more of your parents in you than you think..
-Sometimes when you're angry you have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give you the right to be cruel.
-Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want him/her to doesn't mean s/he doesn't love you with all s/he has.
-Maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
-Never tell a child his/her dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if s/he believed it.
-It isn't always enough to be forgiven by someone else. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
-No matter how badly your heart is broken, the world doesn't stop for your grief.
Sumptin ta tink about
A day without sunshine is like, night.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
Honk if you love peace and quiet.
Remember, half the people you know are below average.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your week.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
Get a new car for your spouse. It'll be a great trade!
Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
Always try to be modest, and be proud of it!
If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand...
OK, so what's the speed of dark?
Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
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