FLIGHTS OF VEDANTA

-- First appeared in print, February 2018. Dedicated to my sister Fanny Nathaniel --

CONTENTS

1. As A Ship Tost ...
2. The Dance Of Shiva
3. Hanuman To Arjuna
4. Chaturangopanishad: Chess Philosophy
5. Lilopanishad
6. Ambarisha
7. Flights Of Vedanta
8. Judas Iscariot: A Verse Drama
9. Epistle To E.B. Rajkumar

1. As A Ship Tost …

As a ship tossed in a turbulent Main
Is my Self astounded by forces twain:
Wild waves and winds of doubts that rise in Maya’s Main.

Would I this batt’ry withstand to join thee,
Or sink to the depths — there ever to be! —
Is known only to Thee, O Lord, only to thee. 

I

O Nirvana, thou blessed void,
One with thee am I unalloyed;
My form with Space has fled to thee,
My name with Time has ceased to be.
To act no space in thee is found,		5
And no time for thought to resound!
Nothing within, nothing without,
Nor a conviction, nor a doubt;
A blessed, blessed state is this —
Absolute Being, Knowledge and Bliss!		10

II

But what is this I now do feel? —
An urge to reveal and to conceal!
Methought, methinks I hear a beat
That has started me from this seat!
Is it fear or saffron desire			15
That forks its tongue and darts like fire?
Lo! Do I conceive or perceive
That which perforce has come to thieve?
To steal away this waveless sea —
Alas, alas — from me, from me!		20
Again I hear the mystic beat
And the tread of dancing feet.
Om, creation’s primal sound, arose
And filled the whole of Cosmos.
Maya her subtle web has spun,			25
So has Lord Shiva’s dance begun.
 
III

The beat, the beat, again the beat;
How calm this time it falls — how sweet!
Ah, behold, yonder springs to view
The hand that holds the Damaru.		30
Now springs a universe of form,			
A sea of change, of calm and storm!
Behold, behold, his calm visage;
See him dance on every stage.
On his locks smiles the crescent moon		35
Which well a lover’s heart could swoon.
How he dances in every sphere!
How he dances in every tear!
Who can say where he dances not?
He dances too in every thought!			40

IV

What shapes are these that spring to view?
Seem they to have a darker hue.
The myriad waves I fought and swam,
Buoyed by the thought that I am!
All the dwarfish forms eddy round,		45
Whose names the falling waves resound.
Behold, behold a sight so strange;
Behold his mild countenance change
And hear the clattery of skulls!
A pang, ecstasy and impulse!			50
Into the dwarfish forms he storms 
And a furious dance performs!
He hurls the trident and the flame,
Impales Glory and burns up Shame;
The coiled-up Shakthi doth arise		55
And bares her fang, serpent-wise;
The heart of things quakes with fear
Lest its throne should disappear.
He opes the Third Eye in his ire
Whence flies forth a volley of fire;		60
Waves clash with waves themselves to still
To fulfil thus his sovereign will.
The whole perish and he with space
Thither gone where no eye can gaze!
But ah! The beat I hear again,			65
“Om, Shanti, Shanti!” floats the strain.
Awhile it floats as float it may
And with the beat it fades away.

V

O Nirvana, thou blessed clime,
Again I merge with thee sublime;		70
My form with Space has fled to thee,
My name with Time has ceased to be.
To act no space in thee is found,			
And no time for thought to resound!
Nothing without, nothing within,			75
Neither a virtue nor a sin;
A blessed, blessed state is this —
Absolute Being, Knowledge and Bliss!		

Yes, Arjuna, fierce warrior with the stalwart arm! Truth is on your side; Sri Krishna
 
is on your side as a charioteer – to rein the horses, guide the wheels and

make you understand the wisdom of your destiny. And I, and I am too on 

your side -- for Truth is on your side.  

But no, Arjuna, this battle is not mine to fight; ’tis your war and you 

will fight and show the world that Truth will prevail in this era too, as 

it did in mine when I fought on Sri Rama’s side for Sita’s sake against

the Lankan foes. We fought foes and strangers, then; not kith and kin. 

Truth is on your side, Arjuna, and so I am too on your side. But 

I know my place. This battle, I say it again, is not mine to fight. 

I was on Sri Rama’s side and we vanquished Evil for ever. That’s what I

thought, but each era has its Evil, which must be vanquished. But I am old 

and tired. Yet I, son of Wind-god Vayu, have strength enough to pluck a hill 

and leap across the sea. My un-singed tail can set the towers of Lanka on fire once again.   


But I know my place. I am on your side, for Truth is on your side; Sri Krishna 

is on your side as a charioteer. And I will be on your side, not to fight the battle 

but as an ensign-badge. Blow the conches! Let the battle begin! And I will flutter 

in the wind as your ensign-badge. For I know my place. And Truth will eventually triumph.

CHAPTER I: WHY THERE IS ACTION

On the battle plains of Kurukshetra,
When, seated on a chariot drawn by thee,
Dark doubts swayed the heart of Arjuna, thou
With that celestial song of life and death
Shewed him the Truth of what is and is not!			5
Krishna, Krishna, thou dispeller of doubts,
Be thou my charioteer too and instruct
And inspire me to sing a profound song,
A second Gita, but on ‘a chequered shade		
Of nights and days,’ as sung a Persian bard,			10
‘Where Destiny with men for pieces plays!’
	Yea, I speak of chaturangam or chess
Or shatranj as it is variously called —
The names differing, yet meaning the same!  
	As an anchored ship unrocked by the waves,		15
As a still flame unflickered by the wind,
Stand the forces twain, of darkness and light,
Two and thirty men in perfect array!
This is the beginning, the primal state
Where action is not, though Space seems to be;			20
And thought is not, though Time seems to flow!
	Where action is not, bloodshed cannot be;
Where thought is not, conflicts do not arise.
But wouldst thou call this life or name it death?
Aye! ’tis conflict that bears the signs of life.			25
	Therefore it is to feel the pulse of life,
The Parabrahm, One without a second,
Has blown a puff of wind to shake the flame,
And shaken the tub to create the waves.
Then begins the struggle to play its part				30
As each strives to regain its former state.
But know ’tis but a game, though full of strife,
A play of opposites — and so is life!

CHAPTER II: WHY THERE IS DIFFERENCE

Fixed laws there be that govern this game,
’Tis not subject to chance as oft believed,				35
For God, as Einstein said, does play no dice!
And the Hand that moves the king, moves the pawn;
And the Lord to every piece roles assigned
And decreed, “Perform well thy task and shine!”
	But ah! Why should white be allowed to make		40
The first move, the initiative to seize,
Leaving black to strive for equality?
Can Nature too a partial mother be
To smile at one and frown at the other?
Nay, the doubt itself has no footing firm,				45
For one might ask the same had black — not white — 
Been the chosen one, the first blow to deal!
Know the choice a mere convention is
Which perchance springs from mankind’s love of light
And all that glisters and seems to be fair!				50
Know that black and white sheer symbols are,
One of the devil, the other of God.
But symbols they are — nothing more, nothing less!
But he that is white, in his ignorance,
Mistakes the serpent for the rope and rope				55
For the serpent; and spites all that is dark,
Knowing not that black too is beautiful.
Behold for proof a maiden’s dark tresses,
And the night enwrought with the stars and moon!
Besides, think not this game is the be all				60
And end all of existence. Many games
Have been played before, and more to follow,
That he who sleeps may tomorrow arise,
And he that bites the dust may kiss the skies! 

CHAPTER III: HOW WE MUST ACT

Wise is he who knows the essence of things,			65
Knows that Life consists of thoughts and acts,
Knows that to know absolute bliss one must
Take a draught from Sorrow’s o’erflowing cup.
He that knows the woods may dwell in the woods,
And he who knows fire may put it to use.				70
Where nescience is, right action cannot be.
Aye! In Wisdom lies the glory and the power.
	Childhood, youth and age be the stages three
Which man must pass through in this life and next.
First is the opening, when limbs develop				75
As all the pieces on the chequered plain.
Second, the midgame when begins the fight
Of longings and cares that oppress the breast.
The third stage and the last is the ending
When all our thoughts and actions tend to rest			80
And upon crutches draw the weary self.
	When Destiny is the same for one and all,
An unperceived birth and a similar end,
Why should man be up in arms against man
And cling to desires that augment one’s pain?			85
The wise do know the noblest thing in life,
And that is the spirit of sacrifice.
One may give up a pawn, a knight, a queen!
And yet win the battle and the race.
Renounce, renounce the pleasures of the sense,			90
Renounce the fruits of toil, but not the toil,
And know that even the lowliest pawn
May become a knight or be crowned a queen!
Seeming paradoxes abound in life,
Knowledge of part cannot them reconcile.				95
But comprehend the mystery of the Whole.
Master thyself and elevate the Soul!

CHAPTER IV: HOW WE MUST PERCEIVE

As a spider weaves its web to ensnare,
So Maya spins her invisible threads.
Reason, therefore, at each and every move;			100
Be neither careless nor over cautious
Lest ye stray and be taken unawares.
Think not the rook superior to the knight,
Nor the queen to rook or bishop or knight.
Each and every piece may live or be slain,				105
Yet the game, like the rising tide or time,
Shall flow on nor ebb till the very last!
	He who plays the game may chance to win or lose;
Thou mayest the victor be or vanquished.
Yet excited be not when thou dost win,				110
Nor lose thy peace when handed a defeat.
Ye may blossom on the hills like a flower
And in the wilderness perish like the same.
Someday the victor may blend with the dust,
And someday the vanquished may resurrect.			115
Ponder no more about thy previous moves,
But think what move this instant must be made.
Unattached and unaffected be
Like the lotus leaf floating on the lake.			
Hold both shame and fame as one and the same,			120
Be not vexed but arise and play the game!

Om Tat Sat

The mango grove was filled with the soft notes of Krishna’s flute. Arjuna was thrilled. 

At length he said to Krishna, “Master, last night I had a strange dream.”

“You must have dreamed of me, then,” said Krishna, the Lord of lords. Arjuna nodded and

began to narrate his dream.

— We were in this self-same grove. You playfully asked me, “Who am I? And who art thou?” 

I piously answered, “Thou art the whole and I a part.”

“I am greater than thou!” you said as though to belittle me.

I remembered the Gita message and boldly answered with pride, “No, Master, thou and I are one!”

This was my dream. —  

Krishna smiled his mystic smile and seemed to be full of mirth. “Arjuna,” he said, 

“this day I proclaim to you a greater truth. Thou art greater than I!”

Arjuna fell prostrate at Krishna’s feet and cried, “Master, what meanest thou to sport thus with me?”

Krishna smiled a lovely smile and began to play his flute.

Om Tat Sat

In Hindustan there was a king 
Who ruled his kingdom without a flaw,
And Truth to him was everything;
His name was Ambarisha.
In people’s hearts he struck a chord		5
And worshipped Vishnu, the supreme Lord,
Remembered Him at morn, at noon,
At eve, at night and got a boon.
The Lord had vouched him protection
With weapon that on His finger spun,		10
The Sudarshana chakra. 
 
The king with spouse went on a fast
And fulfilled a vow and sacred law.
For twelve moon-months the vow did last
On the banks of the Yamuna,			15
The sacred river that washes away
The sins of mortals sans delay.
This day the king his fast would break
But not a rite would he forsake.
Rich gifts he gives to holy men			20
When who should come into his ken?
The sage Durvasa.

The king went forth the sage to meet —
A humbler king one never saw.
The king went forth the sage to greet		25
On the banks of the Yamuna.
And when the sage to him drew near,
With folded palms he sought the seer
To help him break the sacred fast
And share with all the rich repast.		30
The king’s request did please him quite,
“But first I must perform my rite,”
Said sage Durvasa.

But O! the sage has long been gone,
The king was now in a dilemma.			35
The sacred hour was drifting on
For king Ambarisha.
And should the sacred hour be past,
The fruit of the fast would indeed be lost.
But can he feast without his guest?		40
The king does what he thinks is best.
A sip of water the fast can end
And yet would not the sage offend.
Enters sage Durvasa.

One sharp glance at the king he threw		45
And saw him slump with sagged jaw.
And then into a rage he flew,
The sage Durvasa.
The king in truth was innocent,
No insult to the sage he meant;			50
But reason from the sage had fled,
And raving mad he plucked from head
A lock of hair and dashed it down!
And thence an ogre appeared with a frown,
A ravenous rakshasa.				55

The ogre advanced towards the king
Because it had a famished maw.
But round king’s head like halo spinning
Came Sudarshana chakra.
And then towards the demon spun		60
Like shooting star and scorching sun;
Reduced at once the famished ogre
Into bitter ashes and ember,
And then towards the sage it veered.
So stunned and shocked no seer appeared		65
As sage Durvasa.

The sage he found his powers had gone;
He turned and ran, and fled as outlaw!
But the discus flaming chased on …
The Sudarshana chakra.			70
The sage he fled from plain to hill,
From hill to dale he fled but still
He found the discus close behind.
“Hide me,” he cried, “O woods, be kind!”
But the discus set the woods on fire;		75
The woods now looked like funeral pyre.
Poor sage Durvasa.

The sage he fled from place to place
And prayed to Brahma, Indra and Shiva!
But the discus flaming still would chase		80
The sage Durvasa.
The sage still fled, with fear and sweat,
He fled from land to shore and yet
He found the discus close behind.
“Hide me,” he cried, “O sea, be kind!”		85
The sea was kind but the chakra whirled
And the waters boiled and swirled.
Poor sage Durvasa.

The sage then bowed to Lord Vishnu’s will
And stood before the Deity in awe.		90
But even Lord Vishnu cannot still
The Sudarshana chakra.
“This is because,” the Lord told him,
“The devotee only is supreme!”
And then He bade the sage to flee		95
And seek pardon of His devotee.
So he fled and begged the king to save;
The king at once the sage forgave,
Om Namo Narayana!

 
BALLAD THE FIRST: YAJNAVALKYA’S PARTING

Two wives had Yajnavalkya,
Maitreyi and Katyayani;
The first lov’d to hear of Brahman,
And the second lov’d revelry.

To Katyayani said he one day			5
As from her embrace broke he loose,
“Enow, enow of these delights,
I intend to be a recluse.”

Katyayani was a-startled,
Tears from her eyelids slide;			10
But said he unto Maitreyi,
“My wealth between ye divide.”

Katyayani said not a word;
But silence kept not Maitreyi,
“What good is wealth, husband mine,		15	
Can it bring immortality?”

Forthwith to her he made reply,
“Wealth cannot be the means, my dear.”
“Then,” said she, “what may the means be?
Do tell me and I shall hear.”			20

Said Yajnavalkya to his spouse,
“Thou wert dear to me always;
Come, thou, and sit by my side
And list to all that I say.”

He paused, and to his side came she		25
And sat to hear what he would teach.
He look’d at her smiling face
And smiled and renewed his speech.

“The husband and the wife are dear,
And dear the world and the pelf.		30
Not for the sake of the other,
But dear for the sake of the Self.

“The sons and parents are dear,
And dear the gods and all things,
Not for their sake are they dear,			35
But for the Self — the king of kings!

“But verily the Self is dear,
Verily dear for its own sake;
It is to be contemplated
When asleep and when awake.			40

“He’ll be rejected by the world,
And as well by gods and pelf,
If he considers all these things
To be different from the Self.

“Who can grasp the distinct notes		45
Of the conch, drum and lute?
But he who grasps the general note
Grasps all of them by the root.

“And he who grasps the sublime Self
Grasps the Vedas four and all, 			50
For from the Self, like smoke from fire,
Springs all things both great and small.

“As in the ear merge all sounds
And in the eyes all colours;
As in the minds merge all thoughts 		55
And in the nostrils all odours;

“And as in the intellect
Merge all kinds of reasonings
And in the sea all waters,
So in the Self merge all things!			60	  
				
“As salt dissolved in water
Becomes a mass of taste throughout,
So does the Self lose itself
And pervades all things in and out.”

At this point Maitreyi had a doubt,		65
And so to her husband said she,
“A bit confused am I, lord,
For how can the Self cease to be?” —

“Nothing confusing say I, dear,
The Self can never cease to be,			70
For it had no beginning —
Therefore ’twill be eternally.

“The Self is Sat-Chit-Ananda —
Existence, Knowledge and Bliss;
’Tis the One without a second —		75
Therefore it is all there is.

“The Self cannot hear nor see,
Nor can it another smell;
The Self cannot feel another,
Though it has power to do these well.		80

“For what can the Self smell
And what can it see or hear?
What feel and know? ’Tis the One
Without a second, my dear!

“Can the eye itself see, my dear,			85
Or can the fire itself burn?
Nay, and so cannot the One,
Though a knower, itself discern!”

Imparting thus the knowledge pure
He bade both his wives adieu,			90
And left home as a recluse
‘To fresh woods and pastures new’.

BALLAD THE SECOND: THE FLAME OF WISDOM

An eremite in the days of yore,
To Janaka’s court he came;
His locks were matted and his eyes
Glow’d with wisdom’s flame.

Janaka from his throne arose			5
And welcomed the sapient sage.
The sage had come with truths eterne
The king for to engage.

The king was bent to know the truths — 
A lover of Truth was he!			10
They went to a secret chamber
Where dwelt sweet Privacy.

“What serves as light for man, O sage?”
Queried thus the noble king;
And glanc’d at him with earnestness		15
To grasp the truths on wing.

“What, O king, but the glorious Sun
Which dispels the dark away!
For a person toils and resteth
With its light as his stay.” —			20

“The Sun doth indeed,” quoth the king,
Serve as light for every wight;
But what doth serve as light for man
When Day yields to Night?”

“What, O king, but the fervid Moon		25
Which dispels the dark away!
For a person toils and resteth 
With its light as his stay.” —

“Yea, ’tis so indeed,” said the king,
And next his question thus ran:			30
“But when the fervid Moon has set,
What serves as light for man?”

“What, O king, but celestial Fire
Which dispels the dark away!
For a person toils and resteth 			35
With its light as his stay.” —

The king mused awhile and forthwith
A question sprung in his head:
“But what can serve as light for man
When the Fire is dead?”			40   

“What, O king, but the primal Sound
Which dispels the dark away!
For a person toils and resteth 
With its light as his stay.” —

“But when the Sound and its echoes,”		45
The king once again began,
“When the sound and its echoes fade,
What serves as light for man?”

“What, O king, but the supreme Self
Which dispels the dark away!			50
For a person toils and resteth 
With its light as his stay.” —

The king look’d askance at the sage,
And he mused a little span,
“What, O sage, is this supreme Self		55
Which is in mortal man?”	

“That which is in the glorious Sun,
And yet to the Sun unknown,
Is this supreme Self which controls
The Sun on its own.				60

“That which is in the fervid Moon,
And yet to the Moon unknown,
Is this supreme Self which controls
The Moon on its own.

“That which is in celestial Fire,			65
And yet to the Fire unknown,
Is this supreme Self which controls
The Fire on its own.

“That which is in the primal Sound,
And yet to the Sound unknown,			70
Is this supreme Self which controls
The Sound on its own.

“That which is in the frame of bones,
And yet to the frame unknown,
Is this supreme Self which controls 		75
The frame on its own.

“This is the supreme Self,” he paused …
“And thou, O king — thou art That!”
And the king, wiser than before,			
Uttered, “Om Tat Sat.”			80

BALLAD THE THIRD: THREE VIRTUES

Prajapati the primal One
Desired to beget sons;
And forthwith from his sides sprung
The gods, men and demons.

The gods grew up in paradise,			5
And dwelt without a care;
And received all that they desired,
All that was sweet and fair.

The men grew up in sordid earth
With cares that rock the head;			10
And toil’d they with sweat on the brow
To earn their daily bread.

The demons grew up in a world
Where darkness reigned supreme;
And Falsehood, to their hardened hearts,		15
Like glorious Truth did seem.

To know the Truth the sensuous gods
Approached Prajapati,
And said, “Teach us, Father, teach us:
To learn we come to thee.”			20

And Prajapati the Father
Taught them the symbol Da,
And well the gods the symbol grasp’d
And look’d at him in awe.

They said, “Well have we understood		25
The mystic symbol Da.
You ask us to control ourselves
And live without a flaw.”

Then the uncharitable men
Approached Prajapati,			30
And said, “Teach us, Father, teach us:
To learn we come to thee.”	

And Prajapati the Father
Taught them the symbol Da,
And well the men the symbol grasp’d		35
And looked at him in awe.

They said, “Well have we understood
The mystic symbol Da.
You ask us to be charitable
And live without a flaw.”			40

And then the inclement demons
Approached Prajapati,
And said, “Teach us, Father, teach us:
To learn we come to thee.”	

And Prajapati the Father			45
Taught them the symbol Da,
And well they did the symbol grasp
And look’d at him in awe.

They said, “Well have we understood		
The mystic symbol Da.			50
You ask us to be merciful
And live without a flaw.”

And the gods, men and demons
Fashion’d their lives anew;
And with this symbol for their law		55
They bade Falsehood adieu.

 Still is this sacred symbol heard —
A symbol of virtues three —
When the cloud thunders, “Da-Da-Da!”
To remind you and me.			60

BALLAD THE FOURTH: JABALA’S SON   

Beneath a neem in the woods fresh
Sat Gautama the sage,
And fresher still with peacefulness
Was his hermitage.

A youth, convinced that life is vain,—		5
Satyakama was his name,—
To know ‘what is not’ and ‘what is’,
Thither to the sage came.

Kneeling he touched the hermit’s feet
And made obeisance due.			10
And arose and said that he would
To be a disciple true.

The thoughtful sage, inured to keep
The customs of the age,
Glanced with inquiring eye and asked,		15
“May I know your lineage?”

“Jabala is my mother’s name,
A temple maid was she;
And hence she says she knows not 
Who my father might be.” —			20

“A disciple true thou shalt be,”
Said the sage to the youth,
“For who be there so bold enow
To utter such a truth?”

Years did pass and Satyakama			25
Served the sage with great zeal;
And then asked he with earnestness,
“The Truth to me reveal.”

“Truth is Brahman, and Brahman Truth,”
Said the sage as his eyes shone;			30
“He is the One, the only One,
Knowing whom all is known.

“As he who knows a lump of clay
Knows all about the clay,
So he who knows the timeless Truth, 		35
Knows all his cosmic play.”

From Nature did Satyakama 
Grasp the Truth by degrees,
Ever listening to the cows
And the streams and the trees.			40

In due course did Satyakama
Grasp the Truth with ease,
And became one with the Supreme
As rivers with the seas.				

Judas: I have something to confess.
Julia:				What, my lord?
Judas: ’Twas I who betrayed Jesus with a kiss;
	Him betrayed for thirty silver pieces.
Julia: I know it, lord. Ere you betrayed I knew
        Something was wrong, but knew not how I could		5
        Speak against your will. But to my mistress,
        Pilate’s wife went I forth to intercede
        For him. And she spake of it to Pilate,
        And Pilate strongly strove to have Jesus freed.
        The rest you know.
Judas: 				Julia, my dearest,		10
         I knew not you were aware of this all,
         But, Love, him I betrayed not for lucre
         Alone; I thought he wasn’t the Son of God
         Whom he claimed to be. And then the Romans
         Me convinced that he was a sorcerer,			15
         And tempted me with a bag of silver.
         “O I am undone!” thought I when I heard
         That he had risenfrom the fearsome grave.
Julia:  But we are not undone! I on my knees
         Oft prayed, my dear lord, for thyself and me.			20
         He will forgive, if prayers move his heart.
Judas: I was so much struck by remorse that I
          Repented me of my treacherous act,
          And returned to them their filthy lucre.
          They laughed at me, but I heeded them not.			25
Julia: O my lord, glad am I to hear that thou
         Hast returned the money. But still there is
         One thing more. We must on bended knee beg
         Of his forgiveness.
Judas:			Nay, Love, let me be;		
         There can be no forgiveness for the sin			30
         That I had so ruthlessly committed.
          Let me be, Julia, alone for a while.		
Julia: Call me, lord, when my presence you require. 

(Exit Julia)

Judas: Alas, alas for worthy Julia, that					
          She should have so wretched a husband as I!			35
          O what a sinner am I to succumb
          To the temptations that rose from mine heart!
          O Christ Jesus, Son of the living God,
          Hurl me into Hell! For thou thyself said
          That one of thy disciples twelve was — O no!			40
           I am that very devilish devil!
          O Lord, you knew I was the very one
          Who wouldst betray; and yet washed thou my feet.
          Did I, for that kindness unto me shown,
          Repay thee with that treacherous kiss?			45
          Lord, why didst thou not leave me where I was,
          And not call me to be thy disciple?
          Then I would not have stoop’d to such a sin,
          But ah! What is done cannot be undone. 		
(A person enters)
         Who is that? Speak out!
			O Lord, it is thou.			50
         Quickly, Lord, hurl me into hell eterne.	 
Person: O Judas, better than Thomas art thou;
            For he recognized not and doubted me —
            And only believed after he felt all my wounds!
            Thou art blest for thou hast recognized me.			55
            Ask not, Judas, to hurl you into hell;
            For where can I find a hell more fierce
            Than this self-made hell which torments thee now?
            Know, Judas, that heaven’s fair kingdom,
            As well as uncouth hell, lies within you.			60
            Thou art thine own friend and also thy foe!
            Grieve not, for to grieve no fair cause hast thou.
            If thou grieve for having me betrayed,
           Then rejoice now that I’m risen from the dead.
           You have repented of the act: therefore			65
           Thou art saved. I’m come to bring peace to thee.
           Converse with me: all your doubts raise and clear,
           Though ’tis true I have left nothing unsaid.
           Know that I am a friend and not a foe.    	
Judas: O Lord, thy very presence has brought peace.			70
          And thy words have calmed my turbulent breast.
          I knew not thou wouldst this sinner forgive.
          Lord, a thousand-thousand doubts do I have
          That I know not which first I must put forth.
          There is one question which Pilate asked thee,			75
          And thou answered him not, or rather did
          With silence. Answer me, Lord: What is Truth?
Person: Few understand the language of silence.
            Its power is greater than that of the word.
            In the beginning was the eternal word			80
            Called Truth, and it was in silence contained.
            Truth is that which naught weakens but strengthens;
            Truth is that which naught divides but unites;
            This know to be the Truth, and I am That.
Judas: I know that I have come from the unknown,			85
          And I know that I shall return to the same.	
          My Lord, the unknown shall become the known
          When I shall return thither; but let me 
          Know this: Who am I?
Person:				Judas, thou art That.		
Judas: Then am I the Truth? Lord, how can that be?			90
Person: What I once said, Judas, rememberest 
             Not thou? My father and I are One!
             The vine am I and the branches are ye;
             In the Father am I, and in me ye
             And I in ye! And therefore, thou art That.			95
Judas: If Truth be that which strengthens and unites,
          And if I and all be That, then what is
          This seeming difference between self and self?
          And what is life full of inglorious strife? 
Person: Judas, ’tis Maya that enshrouds the Self!			100
            O ’tis that which maketh the One seem twain,
            And sole cause of all this seeming difference!
            But beyond this is he the only One.
            Like a little child that builds with clay,
            And destroys the fort to build it again,			105
            Is he who creates, sustains and destroys!
            He is far away and yet very near;
            He is ever moving and ever still!
            This life is naught but his immortal play,
            A divine comedy which tragic might seem.			110
           ’Tis he who light forms and peace brings!
           ’Tis he the sole author of all these things.

(Enter Julia)

Judas: Come, come, my dearest. Behold Christ the Lord!—
          Lord, whither thou goest?—
Julia: 				None I see, lord.
Judas: Oh Julia, he is gone! How can that be?			115
          Tell me, Julia, him didst thou not see?
Julia: No one was there, lord.
Judas: 				Ah me, I’m afraid!
         How couldst thou an angel behold him not!
         Or was not he Christ the eternal Lord?
         In the form of a serpent Satan once				120
         Had tempted Eve, and perhaps it was he
         Who now came to deceive and to delude!
         A sinner I was, a sinner am I!
         But his reasoning in mine ears seemed right.
         Christ the Lord it might have been after all!			125
         O how I seek my sin to justify!	
Julia: O my poor, grief-stricken lord! No sinner
        Art thou, for thou hast truly repented.
        They say that Jesus came to wash away
        Sin with his blood. Therefore, if it be true,			130
        Your sin of betraying him would have been
        Washed away by his innocent blood pure.
        Lord, I’ll go and fetch the Holy Talmud.

(Exit Julia)

Judas: Sweetest, how well thou hast learnt to reason.
          Nothing, Julia, nothing canst this ocean			135
          Of griefs dry! Not even the Holy Talmud!—
          Lord, am I a mere plaything in thine hands? 
          Or a puppet moved by the strings of Fate?
          Me thou used to fulfil thy prophecy
          That thou thyself wouldst by me be betrayed!			140
          And now I drown in the sea of sorrow,
          And thou lendest not a helping hand,
          For no longer am I of use to thee!
          Yes: I am mine own friend and mine own foe.
          I long to wake from this sleep full of dreams			145
          And long for that eternal, dreamless sleep.
          I shall with a noose squeeze out mortal breath
          From this bag of my self and soundly sleep
          Forev’r and ev’r that breathless, dreamless sleep …

Raj my jo, it is to my shame
That my mind is a flick’ring flame;
Of which I shall to thee proclaim.

All my thoughts I shall dress in verse,
Thoughts profane which I fondly nurse.		5
Now them with thund’ring voice I curse!

If I curse the things that are vain,
The things that prove to be my bane,
Then for blessings what will remain?

I heard a voice proclaim to me,			10
“Vanity, all is vanity!”
O God, let me be, let me be.

Lo, I scanned a thousand pages,
Writ by rogues as well as sages,
To know what would be my wages.		15

First fell I in love with Poesy;
She gave me reasons ‘why I be’
And led me onto philosophy.

What is sin? And what is virtue?
What should we clasp? And what eschew?		20
To these questions I bade adieu.

At night, through mortal reasonings,
Comes Truth — O what sweet awakenings! — 
And then? I soar with devil’s wings.

What is this life? I fondly ask.			25
Is it in idleness to bask,
Or to take up some fruitful task?

Full well I know this for a fact
That I with Sin have made a pact;
I love to think and not to act.			30

From Reason I seem to defect
To join the celebrated sect
Where senses lord over intellect.

What I was, and am, and will be —
Are these fashion’d by Destiny?			35
If “yea”, onward to revelry!
		
For a thousand things my mind craves;
I ride upon the sensual waves;
They rise and fall and my mind raves!

’Tis strange that I, devoid of ease,		40
Strive hard with all my heart to please
The mind whose longings never cease!

O, how can one the mind control?
Am I matter crude or pure Soul?
Just a part or eternal whole?			45

I know that I am no matter,
No longer can it me flatter;
And Maya’s vain glass will I shatter!

’Tis Maya which like Truth appears
And brings to us our smiles and tears,		50
And eke our wonted cares and fears.

Let me dream awhile lovely dreams,
Dreams of high aims and nobler themes,
And break to pieces all that seems.

Ah! Is it my voice which proclaims		55
Such bold words as these, and exclaims
To dream of lofty themes and aims?

O tell me, tell me Raj, if I
Will realize these dreams by and by?
Or will I dream and dream and sigh?		60

O doubts, begone! Hasten away!
Thou canst not break this pot of clay;
With convictions will I build the way.

Seated on this chariot undeck’d,		
Charioted by the Intellect,			65
Surely will I become perfect.

Perfection shall be all my care.
Such my thoughts which I with thee share,
And thou shalt know how well I fare!	

Print
An Eaglet In The Skies (1996)
A Pocket Book Of Rhymes (2006)
Silver Jubilee & Other Poems (2008)
Borrowed Robes (translations, 2012)
Ode To Gaia (2015)
Flights Of Vedanta (2018)

Online
Rocking Pegasus (2002)
Literary Trivia & Curiosities (2004)
A Quiver Of Arrows (2007)
The Pleasures Of Indolence (2014)
The Passionate Verses & Other Translations (2015)
Poetry Workbook (2016)
Playful Poesy (2017)
The Vision Of The Baptist (2017)