 |
 Harmony Rated- PG13 Summary- There
are two vampires with a soul. The world is falling
into chaos because of this anomaly. There is no way around it. One of them has
to die. But which one? Spoilers- This
takes place after Buffy’s Chosen and Angel’s Destiny Disclaimer-
Joss Whedon owns all the characters from BTVS and
ATS. I’m just borrowing. Although, I’m kinda
reluctant to give back a certain bleach blonde Chapter 1 It had been
four months since the battle with the First. Buffy hadn’t spoken of that day
since. Dawn and she had separated from the others, traveling the land of After awhile,
Dawn began to get worried, though. Buffy kept suggesting new places to go. She
never mentioned going back. She acted as if they had always been on the move,
and that they had never faced an ancient incorporeal evil. Dawn had
brought up the past herself, but was shot down quickly. “Are we ever
going back?” Dawn asked her sister. Buffy had
barely glanced at her. “We will. . . Hey, ya wanna go see that castle? “Yeah, Buffy. Whatever.” Buffy was
stalling. This trip had far passed breakage. It had ventured into fleeing
territory. Buffy knew it. Dawn knew it. And Buffy knew that Dawn knew it. But
neither said anything. They continued to explore the beautiful sites and exotic
food. The truth was
that Dawn wished the same thing Buffy did. She never wanted to join the others
in They stayed
inside that morning because it was raining. Normally Buffy would have dragged
Dawn out first thing to start their fun-a-thon. Instead they stayed inside,
Buffy watching a few French shows she didn’t understand, and Dawn writing in
her new diary. She was on her
third page of ranting when the phone rang. Dawn’s adjoining room had a phone.
She reached over and picked up. She was about to say hello when she heard her
sister beat her to it. “Hello?” “Buffy, hello.” Dawn
straightened. Giles. And he sounded serious. “Giles? I’m surprised to hear from you.” “Yes, well. .
. It has been quite difficult getting a hold of you. You haven’t staid in one
hotel for long.” “There is just
so much to see. So much to do,” Buffy chirped. Too cheerful,
Dawn thought. It’s all an act. “I trust “Oh yeah! Tons! It’s treating us real well. Dawn and I are having a
blast here. Yesterday we saw the “Yes, yes. Souffl¢ e au Fromage?” “You speak
French?” “A little,” he
admitted. “And here I
thought you only knew Latin and Aramaic. Wow, Giles, I’m impressed.” There was a
sigh from Giles. Here it comes, Dawn thought, the big bombshell. Something dark
is about to rise in Sunny. . . “Buffy, I’m
afraid you should cut your vacation short. I have made a discovery that
concerns you.” “A discovery?” Buffy spoke slowly. “Bad
discovery? Or good discovery?” “I wish I
could be the bearer of good news. But I am sorry to say that this qualifies as
dire. I have uncovered a prophecy.” “I’m not dying
again.” “No, no! It
isn’t about you at all actually.” “I don’t
understand,” Buffy said. “Why are you telling me then?” “Because the text is about Angel.” “Oh.” “There is to
be another apocalypse soon. I’m a little fuzzy on the date. The scroll I found
speaks of a champion. A vampire with a soul. He will
sacrifice himself to save all, with the heart of love. Because of this selfless
act he shall be granted a reward.” There was
silence. “Buffy?” Giles
asked after a moment. “Yeah? I’m here.” “I think the
news would be best sent by you. Everyone is quite busy here. Besides, I think
Angel would feel most comfortable talking with you.” “D-Does it say
what the reward is?” Buffy asked. “No, it
doesn’t. Its precise words are: He shall be rewarded from the light above.” “The light
above,” Buffy mumbled. “Sunlight?” “It could be a
metaphor, Buffy.” “Right.” “I have booked
a flight tomorrow -” “Dawn and I
are going to “Buffy, I’m
sorry to ruin your plans, but this is very important. Even if you don’t deliver
this news there is the matter of -” “Apocalypse. Yada yada yada.
Well, big news, Giles, I’m not the slayer anymore. I’m ’a’ slayer. And this
slayer is taking a leave of absence. I think I deserve it.” “Yes, you do.
But that doesn’t change the fact that-” “Bye, Giles.
I’ll send a postcard.” There was a
click. “Buffy?” A
pause followed. “Buffy, are you there?” “She hung up,”
Dawn told Giles. “I’ll try to reason with her. Bye, Giles.” With that,
Dawn hung up as well. The dial tone filtered into Dawn’s right ear. Dawn
removed the receiver and stared at it. Buffy hung up on Giles. Buffy hung up on
Giles! Dawn exited
her room. She made her way into the small sitting area of their suite. She
found Buffy opening her blue suitcase. “Hey, Dawnie. How does Instead of
answering, Dawn changed the subject. “Who was on the phone?” “Oh, that was
Giles. He was just checking up on us.” The teen
crossed her arms. She frowned. “Liar.” Buffy turned
her head. “Huh?” “Liar,” Dawn
repeated. “He wasn’t checking up on us. I heard the whole conversation.” “Oh my God,
you were listening in on my conversation!? I so knew that having a phone in
your room was bad. I was imagining you calling some French boy at two in the
morning. But this. . .” Buffy shook her head. “That was private, Dawn.” “It concerns
me too. Buffy, I want to go home,” Dawn said. There was a
choked laugh from her sister. “Home is rubble in a giant crater.” “Home is where
our friends are. They need us,” Dawn corrected. “We can’t run forever.” “I’m not
running. I’m just not ready to go back yet.” “When then? When will you be ready to go back? One year? Two? Twenty?” “Please, Dawnie.” The slayer’s voice was soft. Pleading.
“I can’t.” “Buffy, I know
this is hard.” “You think
this is hard!? You don’t know the definition of hard. Try being the slayer and
then tell me what hard is.” Dawn’s eyes
grew larger. “That isn’t fair!” “People are
dead. I was their leader. You don’t know what it is like to know that they are
gone because of you. If I go back I‘ll have to face that. I‘ll have to
remember.” “You knew some
weren’t going to make it.” Buffy closed
her eyes. She gripped the edge of the green armchair. “But I didn’t know ’he’
wouldn’t make it.” “Who?” “I told him to
leave. He had finished what he was supposed to do. But he wouldn’t go. He had
to be the hero.” “Spike,” Dawn
whispered. “I thought I
had time,” Buffy went on. “That he’d always be around.
He was a vampire, ya know. Supposed to keep on going
and going like the Energizer Bunny. He wasn’t supposed to die!” She watched as
Buffy fell apart. She had no idea what to say or do. “I should have
made him go. I should have done something. But I left. He told me to go and I
did.” Buffy shook. She opened her eyes, but it seemed as if they were seeing
something else. Something four months ago. “I knew
that he was the one. I wanted to become a cookie for him. Except
it was too late. Time was up.” Dawn scrunched
up her forehead. Cookie? This wasn’t the time to
comment on Buffy’s peculiar way of thinking, though. So she kept quiet. Buffy met
Dawn’s gaze. “Why is it that we don’t realize how important something is until
it is gone?” “Did you love
him?” Dawn questioned. Buffy’s green
eyes watered. “I think maybe I did.” She took a deep breath. “But it doesn’t
matter now.” Dawn stepped
forward. She put her arms around Buffy. “I miss him too.” The slayer
leaned against her younger sibling, the usual strong woman needing support.
They clung to each other, crying, wishing they could change the past. But all
they had was the future. A future without Spike. _________________________________________________ Chapter 2 “They lied to
you,” Wesley stated matter of factly. “There is no
mention of a chalice of torment.” He had two
books opened. They sat facing him on the desk. One was a translated version,
while the other was the original. He had been comparing both and found very
little difference. “We kinda figured, mate. It being filled with Mountain Dew and
all,” Spike commented. He was seated in a chair next to his grandsire, his head
propped up by a hand. He looked bored. Angel leaned
forward. “What does it include exactly?” “Basically
I’ve told you everything in it. A coming darkness, apocalyptic battle, a few
plagues, and some. . . fiends.” The
dark-haired vampire cast a glance at Spike. The blonde rose
an eyebrow. “In all
reality,” Wes stated,” It isn’t very specific. When the champion has completed
these obstacles he will be given a gift. To live until he
shall die. To shanshu.” “Read it to
me. Word for word,” Angel requested. A snort came
from Spike. “Bloody hell. I am not sitting here for
another two hours while you dissect . . .” “No one
invited you,” Angel growled. He glared at him darkly. “This does
concern me,” Spike pointed out. “Two vampires with a soul, remember? We don’t
know which one of us this thing is talking about.” Angel didn’t
seem to have anything to say to that. Clearing his
throat, Wesley slipped on his glasses. He shifted his eyes to the beginning of
the prophecy and began to read. Spike got to
his feet. “Right then. I’ll just see myself out.” Neither
acknowledged his departure. Figures. No one seemed to
want him around. Well, except for that cute scientist. But truth was that he
didn’t belong here. Images of the past ran through his mind. He hadn’t really
fitted in with Buffy’s lot either. Spike stuffed
his hands in the pockets of his leather duster. He walked down the hall, having
nowhere to go. ************************* Buffy
hesitated outside the unfamiliar house. It was gray with a white door. Stone
steps led up to the entrance. She shifted
from foot to foot, staring at the doorbell. “Are you going
to push it? Or should I?” Dawn said. The teen
wrapped her arms around herself. “It’s cold out here. Please hurry up.” Buffy nodded.
“Give me a minute. I’m just a little scared.” “I thought you
were okay with this. You said you were okay.” The slayer
sighed. “I know what I said, Dawn. And I meant it. I’m ready. I really am.” Dawn frowned.
Her sister sounded as if she was trying to convince herself. The previous
day had been spent talking. Buffy had admitted to her attempt at escapism. They
had shared memories and feelings. Dawn had confessed about how she still felt
bad about never forgiving Spike. Buffy had spilled about her regrets on waiting
until it was too late to give him a chance. There had been mentions of Anya and the SIT, but it had been mostly about Spike. His
death had hit the hardest. Finally Buffy
decided to move on. She would accept what happened and live. That is what Spike
gave his life for, wasn’t it? So that she and the others could live. Buffy purchased
two plane tickets to “Then push the
damn button!” Dawn snapped. Buffy turned
toward Dawn, her green eyes wide. “Dawn Summers! Do you know what Mom would
say?” The door swung
open during their squabbling. A middle-aged man stood there. He wore dark
slacks and a green sweater. He peered at them through his spectacles. “Buffy? Dawn?” The girls
froze. They felt as if they had been caught by a parent. “Oh, hey, Giles. We wanted to surprise you. So, uh, surprise,”
Buffy told him with a forced smile. “So good to see you. And yes, this is a surprise,” the watcher
replied. “I was just
about to ring the doorbell.” “Uh, yes.” He ran a hand through his thinning hair. “I heard your bickering and decided to intervene.” Dawn rubbed
her arms. “Giles, can we come in? I’m freezing out here.” “Oh, yes, yes,
of course.” Giles held the door open wider, inviting his sergeant daughters
inside. The place was
nicely furnished. It had white carpet and walls. There were a few paintings on
the wall. Buffy thought she recognized one as Van Gogh. She was proud of that.
School hadn’t been a total waste after all. They were led
into the living room. Buffy opened her mouth, about to comment on the big
screen television, but decided not to. She could tease him later after they’d
discussed this matter about Angel. The couch was
brown and quite cozy. Buffy could imagine falling asleep on it. She wished that
she could lean back, close her eyes, and fall into nothingness. There were
important things that needed to be straightened out, though. She was needed. “So, Giles, hit me.” “Excuse me.” Buffy shook
her head with a small smile. “Tell me about the prophecy.” “Oh, yes.” He
got up and exited a room. A moment later he came in carrying a rolled up
scroll. “I found this
on a dying man. He was protecting it with his life. A demon almost got his
hands on it, but our band dispatched the threat. It was too late for the man,
regretfully. He shoved the scroll at me, and then begged for me to keep it out
of the hands of evil.” Giles undid
the parchment. It had an archaic appearance, having been weathered. He lay it
down on the coffee table, putting a book on each end to prevent curling. Buffy
leaned forward, studying the gibberish symbols. “It’s a
mixture of a couple languages. So far I have translated the Aramaic and
Egyptian,” Giles explained. Raising her
head, Buffy asked, “So you haven’t read the whole thing then?” “Heavens no. Not even half. The Aramaic section speaks of a champion
that I can only assume is Angel. It describes him as a demon with a soul. Since
Angel is the only. . .living vampire in existence with
such qualifications. . .” Buffy nodded.
“I see.” “He will face
the coming darkness, sacrifice himself for the greater good, and receive a
reward. The reward I told you about on the phone.” “The sunlight.” “Light from
above, yes,” Giles said. “These things are rarely literal, though.” “Gotcha.” “So, are we
going to LA?” Dawn questioned, breaking her silence. “If that is
what Giles wants.” She paused. “Maybe I should just call.” “Buffy, this
isn’t the sort of news you break over the phone. I think it would be best for
you to tell him in person,” Giles said. Buffy sighed.
“I guess we’re going to sunny ___________________________________________________
Chapter 3 It didn’t take
long for “Buffy.” The slayer
reached out and gave her best friend a hug. “It is good to
see you.” “It is good to
be seen,” Buffy replied. Both girls
gave small smiles. Buffy was led
into the apartment. It was small, but homey. She had expected to find Kennedy
there too, but it appeared to just be They both
settled on the blue loveseat. There was an awkward silence. Neither knew what
to say. “So . . .” Buffy
began. “Yeah?” “How you like “It’s a lot
like Sunnydale, but bigger. Same oogly booglies running around.” Buffy nodded. They went back
to silence. “Are you okay,
Wills? Did something happen? You aren’t mad at me, are you?” Raising her
head, Concern came
over Buffy. She knew what it felt like to have your heart broken. “What
happened?” “We just
didn’t fit. We were two corner pieces of a puzzle trying to fit together. That
never works. It was a mutual agreement. We both felt like it was time.” Her
eyes glistened with unshed tears. “It still hurts, though.” Buffy took “It is so
hard. Everything reminds me of her. I turn on the TV and see a show she used to
watch. Even this morning when I ate breakfast I thought of her. Kennedy loved
pancakes. We made funny shapes together.” She paused and then added quietly,
“Tara and I did that too.” Buffy’s heart
went out to her friend. She could relate. Although the occurrences were less
frequent, Spike still invaded her mind. The other day she saw Buffalo Wings on the menu at a restaurant and had the urge to cry. Buffy wanted
to tell “ “Huh?” “I have to go
to LA and tell Angel about a prophecy. Wanna come
with? We can go shopping and dancing. It’ll take our minds off stuff for
awhile.” “Didn’t you
already get your mind off stuff in Buffy bit her
lip. Was this an attempt to run away again? “Okay,” *************************** Buffy slammed
the phone down in frustration. “He’s in
‘another’ meeting,” she told her sister. They were both
in Giles’s kitchen. Buffy had been trying to get a hold of Angel for hours now.
Dawn was currently searching through the watcher’s selection of food for an
afternoon snack. “I guess we’ll
have to make a surprise visit.” Dawn held up a
box of instant hot chocolate. “Cocoa?” Buffy froze.
She could see the label on the box. It was the kind with the tiny marshmallows
already mixed in with the powder. Lowering her
arm, Dawn sighed. “Sorry. I didn’t think.” “No. No, it’s
all right. I’ll have a mug.” “You sure?” “Yeah.” The teen
prepared the two drinks in the microwave. Then they sat next to each other at
the island, sipping away at the hot liquid. “Do you think
he’s in heaven?” Dawn quietly asked. The question
lingered in the air. Buffy opened her mouth, but didn’t know how to respond.
She had no answer. She didn’t know about the qualifications to get accepted
into certain dimensions. “If any vampire
deserved to go to heaven it would be one that saved the world. So. . .” Buffy
faced Dawn. “I’d like to think so.” Dawn nodded
her head in understanding. The thought of
Spike going to hell was devastating. A champion deserved much more. ************************ “This is
hell,” Spike complained. “Being stuck here in this forsaken
law firm. I’d rather have to face the mob in “Then why
stick around, Spike? You aren’t bound to Wolfram and Hart anymore. You should
go find yourself a crypt with a view.” “I think I
might just do that. Mosey on over to “It’s only
temporary.” “Your problem,
not mine,” Spike declared. He thrust his
hand into his coat. He took out a pack of cigarettes and lit one. He puffed
away at the stick, purposely making the smoke float over toward Angel. Too bad
the poof didn’t have to breathe. Spike leaned
back in his chair and propped his feet up on Angel’s desk. “For someone
with a soul you sure seem to care about only yourself,” Angel stated. “For someone
with a soul you seem to be siding with the dark side of the force.” A growl
emerged from Angel’s throat. Spike smirked, enjoying the rise he had created. “If the senior
partners are right. . .” “Because they
never lie,” Spike interrupted. Scowling,
Angel continued. “If they are right then this situation isn’t just about Las
Angelus. If it doesn’t get taken care of it will spread. So, Spike, you can run
along to Spike knew he
was right. And that was something he hated to admit. Spike took his
cigarette and put it out on the top of the desk. Angel got to
his feet. He pointed to the door. “Out! Now! Go to
another room, a bar, cemetery, or “No need to
shout. I’m going.” Spike got out
of his seat and headed to the exit. Once more that
day Spike stood in the hallway. He banged his head back against the wall. He
really needed to figure out where to go because he certainly felt like he was
trapped in hell there. ____________________________________________________ Chapter 4 Spike spotted
Harmony behind her desk, looking bored. He was about to walk on by, ignoring
her, but abruptly stopped. He studied her. She was chewing some gum with her
mouth open, playing with a piece of golden hair. “What?”
Harmony asked. “Nothing,”
Spike replied. He began to go down the hall again, but turned back around.
“Actually, there is something. Can I talk to you? Somewhere
private.” Harmony
sighed. “I’ve done some thinking and I’m not having sex with you again.” “That’s not
what I’m after. I just want to have a discussion.” “I have a job
to do. I can’t just walk away.” “Right,
because you are so busy.” He growled and grabbed her arm. He hauled her out of
her seat. “Come on.” Harmony jerked
her arm, but Spike prevented her from breaking lose. “Hey, you can’t order me
around! I’m not your slave! Let me go!” “Bloody
women,” Spike cursed. He led the
natural blond to an office. Without knocking, he thrust open
the door. It happened to be the same room the secretary and he had taken over
before. The occupant glanced up. He immediately got to his feet. “You don’t
have to kick me out this time. I’m leaving. Just let me get my paperwork.” The
man hurriedly gathered some things off his desk. “There, all yours.” Spike gave him
an unnerving smirk. “Very kind of you, mate. We won’t be long.” “R-ight.” The man shut the door
on his way out. It suddenly
occurred to Spike that the Wolfram and Hart employee probably thought they
wanted the office to bang each other. He had just made it sound like it didn’t
take long at all to get the job done. That’s great, Spike thought. So much for boosting your sexy big bad persona. Harmony faced
him, annoyed. She crossed her arms. “What do you want, Spike?” “I wanted to
discuss the other day. When we . . .” “What is there
to discuss? You used me and I let you.” Spike took an
unneeded deep breath. He knew he was going to regret this. But he couldn’t get
the incident out of his head. He had to do something about it. “Harm, it is
never going to happen again. I was a little out of my rocker from being a ghost
and just needed to . . . feel something.” Now he sounded like the slayer. “What
we did was wrong.” “God, Spike,
you don’t have to get all apologetic. You think too much with that soul of
yours. I knew exactly what was going on when I agreed to do it.” Spike put up
his hands in defeat. “You know what, forget it.” “Yeah, let’s.” “Fine.” “Fine.” Caught off guard, Harmony rammed into him. She threw her arms
around his neck and crushed her lips to his. Spike quickly pried her away,
slamming her into the wall. “What the
bleeding hell are you doing!?” he exclaimed. Harmony
straightened, smoothing her flowered skirt. “Oh, Spikey,
I knew you cared. This just proves it.” “What?” “You
apologized and don’t want to have meaningless sex anymore. I just knew deep down
you wanted more.” “Not from
you!” “But . . .
It’s that slayer isn’t it!? You can’t forget her at all.” Spike shook
his head. He headed for the door. He had had enough of this. ************************* Buffy decided
to go see Angel alone. It seemed only right to tell him about the prophecy
without company. She didn’t
know what she expected, but this wasn’t it. Wolfram and Hart was packed with
both humans and demons. They were all busy, doing their jobs. The place was
huge and she had a hard time comprehending that Angel owned it all. It was
impossible to walk right through the door without being intercepted. She had to
go through a metal detector and then was bombarded with questions. “I’m here to
see Angel. I’m his . . . “ What was she? “Friend.” That was a simple term, but it still didn’t settle
right in her head. “Name?” the
woman asked. “Buffy Summers.” “Just a
moment, please.” The woman
picked up a phone and pushed a button. After a few seconds she said into the
receiver, “Mr. Angel, there is someone here to see you. She says that she is an
acquaintance.” There was a
pause. “Buffy Summers.” The woman
nodded. She put down the phone. With a smile she addressed Buffy. “He said to
send you right up. Go to second floor. There’s a sign outside his office.” “Thanks,”
Buffy told her. The slayer
found the elevator. She stepped inside and punched the button to go up. Sure
enough, it wasn’t hard to find Angel’s door. His name was displayed outside in
large, bold letters. She didn’t
feel right barging in, so she politely knocked. “Who is it?”
Angel asked from inside. “Angel, it’s
me,” she answered. “Buffy.“ Her name was said with yearning. It made her chest ache.
“Come in,” he added. She
attentively stepped inside. She closed the door behind her. She stood in place,
their eyes meeting. The world seemed to stop spinning. It always seemed like
things stood in place whenever she saw him. It was a mixture of goodness and
badness all rolled up into one. Angel
recovered first. He gestured to the chair before his desk. “Have a seat.” “Oh, yeah.” She gave a small smile. She went over and settled into
the seat. She shifted, trying to get comfortable. “I tried to
call before coming, but they kept telling me you were busy,” she explained. Angel folded
his arms. “I have a lot of things to take care of.” “Yeah, I get
that. This looks like a pretty important place.” “It is. It
takes a lot of work to keep running.” Angel ran a hand through his gelled hair.
“So, how is everybody?” “Good.
Everybody is good. Giles is gathering slayers and rebuilding the watcher’s
council. Xander got a new job. Willow. . . Well, Nodding, Angel
said, “Good. How are you? How was “Lots of things to see. Dawn and I had fun.” There was a
span of silence. “Um, Buffy. .
. Why are you here? Did you come to visit or . . .?” “Oh!” Buffy
held up the scroll Giles had entrusted in her care. “I have this to show you.” She handed it
to him. He examined
it. “What is it?” “It’s a
prophecy about a vampire with a soul. Giles assumed it must be you. It talks
about how you’ll save the world and get some shiny reward.” Angel set the
scroll down. He leaned back and frowned. “Why the
broody face? Rewards are good,” Buffy remarked. Just then the
door burst open. A figure clad completely in white came in. “See what you
get when you are all noble,” Spike muttered. “Angel, I’m going to hide in here
a bit. You won’t give me an office and I gotta stay
somewhere to get away from your love-sick secretary.” Buffy’s head
spun. She jumped to her feet. “Spike.” Wide green
eyes met blue. She felt herself grow dizzy and she would have fallen if she
hadn’t grabbed the edge of Angel’s desk. “How?” she
questioned. Spike opened
his mouth to speak. _________________________________________________
Chapter 5 Buffy thought
the world had shifted when she set eyes on Angel. That was nothing compared to
what happened when she saw Spike again. The world didn’t change. Instead she
saw a whole new world open up for her. Spike was all she saw and all she felt.
He filled everything in her and everything around her. He was everything. It was too
much. Her mind was overwhelmed and couldn’t take it. She sunk to her knees. Stepping
forward, Spike glared at his grandsire. He pointed to the distressed slayer.
“You weren’t going to tell me she was here,” he accused. Angel just
stared. Spike went to
Buffy’s side. He scooped her up as if she weighed nothing more than a cat. Those arms. So strong and comforting.
They were never meant to let go. Hold me forever, Buffy silently pleaded. Never
let go again. There was no
temperature in the man that carried Buffy. Still, somehow he managed to fill
her with warmth. She sizzled with electricity from their contact. She was laid
down on a couch, barely noticing. Spike tried to straighten, but she wouldn’t
let him. Her fingers gripped his arm with slayer strength. She wouldn’t let him
go. If he wouldn’t hold her till the end of time, she would him. Nodding with
understanding, Spike knelt beside her. He gave her a genuine smile. The
expression was a rarity. He hardly ever lifted his lips in such a manner.
Arrogant smirks, yes. Mocking grins, yes. Real smiles, seldom. Buffy felt herself melt. *********************** Angel watched
the pair with disdain. Blond vampire and slayer only had eyes for each other. A
giant bubble encased them, separating themselves from everything on the
outside. She used to
look at me like that, he thought. He took in an unneeded breath. “Ah ha, boyfriend!” “He‘s not.
But he is in my heart.” A vice
squeezed Angel’s dead heart. Was he even in her heart anymore? Or was it all
taken up by Spike? He had left
her. This was all his doing. But if he knew this was going to happen. . . If she wanted to blow her life on a vampire. . . It should
be me, Angel told himself. I’m the one who deserves
her. I’m the one who went to hell and back. I’m the champion. I’m not some
poser reject got a soul to get into some girl’s pants. I don’t do good for selfish reasons. I want to save the world. Both of
Angel’s hands tightened into fists. He had the urge to rush at Spike and slam
one into that bleach-fried head of his. Angel suddenly
realized that there were murmurs. He had been so involved in his thoughts that
he missed their conversation. He tuned them in. “I don’t . . .
How?” Buffy whispered. Her green eyes were shimmering. They took Spike in as if
he were a dream and she would wake up any moment. “Long story,
pet,” Spike replied. He ran a hand through his slicked back locks. “You were
dead.” “Still am.” He
took her hand and placed it on his still chest. Buffy sat up a
little on the cushions. “You know what I mean.” “Yeh, I do.” There was a pause. “I was dead, yes.” Buffy closed
her eyes for a few seconds and then opened them again. She let out a choked
laugh. “Seems like nobody stays dead these days.” “Should we
send an angry letter to the Powers that Be?” Spike suggested. “No. No.
Because . . . Because I’m glad.” That was it.
Those words were all Angel could stand. He couldn’t hear anymore. Another
sentence would be his breaking point. He turned and
left the office, slamming the door on his way out. ********************** Buffy and
Spike didn’t even notice Angel’s departure. Not even when the door created a
loud bang when it shut. Stillness
surrounded them. Buffy clung to Spike and he was now doing the same to her. She
wanted to tell him things. She needed to say so much. But it seemed wrong to
disturb the quiet. It felt like if there was a sound this all would be
destroyed. It would break their perfect sanitary bubble and let in the dirty
germs. The door
opened. Crash. The bubble wall burst and it all fell away. The coldness seeped
in. Buffy tightened her grip on Spike, determined to keep him from drifting
away. Harmony came
in with a steaming mug in her hand. “Angel, 98.6 degrees, exactly like you. . .” She frowned at the empty desk. Her gaze
traveled over to land on Buffy and Spike. The secretary
gaped at them. Then she crashed the mug of blood down on the surface of Angel’s
desk. Red liquid splattered out of the container. She crossed
her arms. “So this is it? This is the reason you broke up with me? Your
precious Buffy is back?” “Harm . . .”
Spike began. Harmony held
out her palm in a gesture of silence. “Don’t even start. I know we weren’t
really going out. But I wanted to pretend, all right. That’s all I ever wanted.
I wanted to pretend you really cared, but you kept making me remember. It isn’t
fair!” “Harmony, I
told you. . .” “I know! It is
over. No more sex buddies. I got it.” With that she stormed out. Silence fell
over the office again. Buffy abruptly
let go of Spike. She moved, sitting up. “You slept
with Harmony?” she asked, stolidly. “Once,” he
confessed. “I realize that it was wrong. I needed something to get over the
detached feeling of being a ghost.” Her green eyes
widened. “You were a ghost?” Spike ran a
trembling hand through his hair. “Sorta. Not exactly. I was incorporeal.” Buffy poked
him in the side. “You seem fine now.” “Yeah, got myself a friendly gift that set things to right.” “So, you were
a ghost and had sex with Harmony?” She let out a humorless chuckle. “God. And nobody was going to bother to tell me you were
back. I was in She knew that
she had no justification to give him a lecture. She had used him the same way
he used Harmony. Any scolding would be hypocritical. “Sorry, Buffy,
but it isn’t like you have some sort of claim on me.” Tears sprung
to Buffy’s eyes. “I told you I loved you. Isn’t that claim
enough?” “Right, and
were you telling the truth?” She raised her
eyes to meet his. “I don’t know. I think so. I wanted it to be true. I thought
that maybe when it was all over we might be able to have a chance. I watched
you die, though. Goodbye chance.” Buffy paused. “And you don’t know how broken
I was to know that. I would never be able to let myself love you. Because you were gone. But now we have a chance. Please, let
us have a chance.” Her little
confession had left him speechless. He gazed at her with soulful eyes. She
figured there had been enough talk. She grabbed him and pulled him toward her.
Their bodies met, smashing together. Buffy attacked
his mouth. She slipped in her tongue, surveying the landscape. She had missed
this. There was nothing like the taste of Spike. Blood,
alcohol, and cigarettes. Spike batter, beat together and cooked at room
temperature. All bad ingredients, but when they combined it turned into
something good. Well, ’mostly. Spike wouldn’t be Spike without that pinch of
badness. Buffy wished
she had the recipe to bake herself. Oh forget about completing your dough
mixture! her mind cried. Right then she felt like
Spike was all she needed. He was the chocolate chips. And who really cared
about the rest of the cookie anyway? A moan escaped
her throat. They parted and stared. “What was
that?” Spike questioned. “I’m acting.
There’s been enough talk. We can talk later.” With that she
kissed him again. _________________________________________________________ Chapter 6 Angel was
brooding. It was a habit he tried desperately to deny. He often told himself
that he was only pensive. Deep in thought because he had a
lot to think about. In no way was he dwelling over how unfair his life. . . er, unlife
had turned out. Hah! For once he had to admit it. He was brooding big time. Buffy and
Spike were in his office. Alone. In
‘his’ office. He had been evicted from his own personal space. Okay, it
had been his idea to leave, but still . . . They were intruding. Who knows what
they were doing in there. Angel could guess, though. The reunion he had
witnessed had been pretty cuddly. They looked like lovers. Two
people deeply in love. Love. Angel had
known love once. It seemed so long ago. There was an
emptiness where it used to burn inside his chest. All that remained was
a faint echo from the past. He wondered if he would ever know it again. No, he decided.
Not unless it was her again. Or . . . Angel abruptly
stopped walking. He closed his eyes. The image of another woman popped into his
head. He felt guilty for not thinking about her lately. He had been so
preoccupied with everything. She was important and he did not want to neglect
her. The pain was still fresh. At least with Buffy he had learned to live in
their separation. Miles cut them off from each other. Distance made it easier. Cordy . . . She was right there. She was in the same
building. And still, she was lost to him. Worse than Buffy.
Cordy was there, taunting him, and gone forever at
the same time. He moved
against his will. He stepped through the firm, possessed. The door beckoned to
him. He reached it, pressing his palm to its smooth wood. He could feel
her. Vampires were able to sense humans. Especially the
slayer. She possessed the air of strength and courage. But Cordelia was just a girl. Despite that she was like no
other. She was confident and determined. Ready to go to any
limit in order to achieve her goal. She was magnificent. As potent as any slayer. Cordelia wasn’t a substitute for Buff. She was whole new
territory. His innocent Buffy had been sunshine and rainbows. He had seen them
when they really hadn’t been there at all. She had given him rose-colored
glasses. His seer was about discovering light in the darkness. It was about
accepting the bad, but not letting it overcome them. They had created something
splendid and tangible in the middle of chaos. Leaning his
forehead against the cold door, he came to realize something. Buffy was long
over. It had been a fleeting fantasy. Something he would hold dear until the
end of time. But that was all it was. She was no longer the glowing, young teen
he had fallen for. Even if he Shanshued that very day
it would never work out. She had gone through metamorphosis and moved on. She
had embraced the truth as well. Their shiny mirage was over. He would
always love Buffy. But she didn’t fit with him anymore. This notion
froze him. He had been holding onto the dream of them for so long. There had
always been that tiny flame of hope, no matter how small. Now it flickered and
went out. Angel braced himself. He straightened. He took his hand and gripped the
doorknob. It turned easily. Too easily. There was no
stench of sickness in the room. He was thankful for that. He wouldn’t have been
able to handle that. The entire
space was white. Still and silent, except for the steady beeping pace of the
heart monitor. It was like stepping into another dimension. The outside was
harsh and abrasive. This was tranquil and sterile of the ugliness that dwelt
behind the walls. It was almost holy. Angelic. Maybe
even a piece of heaven. Staring down
at the woman lying in bed, Angel believed it to be fact. This place was sacred.
The infirmary
had become his sanctuary. He came there to get away. To rest and regenerate. Sometimes he
could fool himself into feeling love there. But that was impossible. Cordelia was gone. Jasmine had cast her away. Only a shell
remained. Or so he hoped. He wished with all his being that she wasn’t locked
away, immobile, and confined. Screaming to get out. No. No, she
couldn’t be. She was somewhere else. Somewhere far away.
Better. Angel seated himself in a white chair beside her bed. He scooted closer.
With steady fingers, he reached out and took her hand. Warmth swept into him.
Her skin was so soft and alive. Cordelia smelled fresh and in-bloom. Her hair had grown out. It
ran past her shoulders now, long and silky. He ordered a change of clothing and
bath every day. The ones who carried it out probably thought he was crazy.
Catatonic people didn’t need designer clothes and salon shampoo. Queen C would
be proud. She always wanted the best. She deserved the best. Angel cleared
his throat. The action didn’t prevent the catch in his voice. “Cordelia.” Her name hung
in the air. It was whispered, absorbing every syllable. “Sorry I
haven’t been around the past few days.” He believed
that her spirit wasn’t in Wolfram and Hart. That didn’t keep him from talking
to her every chance he got. She heard him. Wherever she was, she heard him. “A lots been going on. I’ve had some big cases. Someone
planted a robot to impersonate Wesley’s father. Workers were stricken ill. I
was lied to about the Shanshu prophecy.” He gritted
his teeth. “Spike’s been his usual pain in the ass. And Buffy’s come to see me.
But her attention is mostly focused on our dear bleach-wonder.” He took a
deep, useless breath. Taking her in,
he was overwhelmed with awe. God, she was a sight. Some
sleeping beauty. She looked like a princess begging to be awakened by a
kiss. If only that were true. Overcome by
emotion, he gazed up at the ceiling. “Oh, Cord, I
could use you about now. No, not now. Always. You’re my best friend. More than
just that. But you know that already.” “I can’t help
but wonder what things would be like if Jasmine had never entered our lives.
Would Conner still hate me? Would we have worked?” He paused. “I can’t help
but wonder. But it doesn’t change reality, does it?” Angel bent
down. He pressed his cold, dry lips to her hot, moist ones. “Bye Cordy. I’ll be back sooner than before. I promise.” He squeezed
her hand. For a second he thought he detected movement in her fingers. It must
have been his imagination. The vampire
stood up, departing. He left the room, entering the hectic medical ward.
Wolfram and Hart orderlies moved about, occupied. He could detect the use of
medication being administered in the atmosphere. There was also the strong
aroma of sickness. And death. Weaker,
but there. It made him nauseous. Which was rare
considering his status. He passed a
doctor in a lab coat. She was talking to a colleague, examining a file. “I’ve never
seen anything like this before.” She sounded baffled. Her companion
nodded. “Neither have I. His symptoms don’t connect. Blindness,
temporary paralysis, vomiting, seizures, and hearing loss? It makes no
sense.” Angel became
alert. This was something he needed to look into. He stepped
over to the doctors. He had made an attempt at getting to know most of the
employees at Wolfram and Hart, but he must have overlooked these two. “Excuse me, uh
. . .” He glanced at the female’s nametag. “Miss Winters.” Kate Winters’s eyes widened. She immediately recognized her
boss. “Oh . . .” She
stuck out her hand. “Angel, right? I’m Kate Winters,
yes. And this is Robert.” The male
doctor nodded. Angel shook
Kate’s hand. Gesturing to
her papers, he asked, “May I please see the file?” “Oh, of course.” She handed it over willingly. He scanned it
over. The patient
worked in the mail room. He was young, age twenty-three. He had never been
diagnosed with any major illnesses before. His family history showed nothing
life-threatening in his genes. His episode had hit suddenly, without any
warning at all. He began to go into convulsions. He had never had an epileptic
fit before. The shaking had ceased, leaving him partly paralyzed. Then he
reported to be gradually going blind. Soon after he no longer could see ‘or’
hear anything. Angel looked
up from the file. “Did anything
unusual happen right before the incident?” Confused, Kate
replied, “No. Why do you ask?” “This might
not be a physical illness.” “You think it
is supernatural?” Robert questioned. “Yeah, I think
it might be.” “That might
explain why his condition doesn’t add up,” Kate agreed. “There was no reports of any weird occurrences. But to be sure
maybe it should be looked into.” “I’m on it,”
Angel told her. He held up the file. “May I borrow this?” Surprised, she
blinked. “Yeah. Let me make a copy.” He handed over
the folder. She took it to be photocopied. After
receiving the information, he proceeded out of med-lab. A stab of foreboding
washed over him. Something was coming. ________________________________________________ Chapter 7 Angel
hesitantly entered his office. He was afraid he would walk in on a Buffy and
Spike make-out session. Which would be considered his version
of hell. Despite his little epiphany before, it didn’t change the fact
that he wanted the best for Buffy. He still cared about her and thought that
Spike was definitely a bad choice. Any road traveled with his grandchilde led to a dark place. There was no
graphic activity in the room. To his relief they were sitting calmly on the
couch. Buffy’s hand was in Spike’s, however, making him grit his teeth. She
abruptly detached from the bleach-blonde, and stood up. Spike raised an eyebrow
in question. They locked eyes, speaking silently to each other. Angel was
unnerved. How could they have such a connection? Buffy and Spike were nothing
alike. They couldn’t possibly fit the way they appeared to. At least . . . And
then it hit him. He didn’t know Buffy at all anymore. That’s all he
needed. Another reason why Buffy and he would never work out
even if they wanted to. The slayer
made her way up to her ex. “Angel, I need to say some stuff. Before, about that
cookie dough speech. I was wrong. I’m not done baking, but . . .” Her
expression showed how sorry she was. “You see, I didn’t realize that certain
people shape who you are. And Spike . . . He . . . “ That was as
far as Angel let her get. “Buffy,” Angel
harshly interrupted. She instantly
shut up, startled. “I can’t talk
to you right now. Please leave.” He said it coolly, trying to control himself. “Angel. . .”
Her voice was broken. She was obviously hurt. “I need to get this out.” “Later,” Angel
told her. “Right now I need you gone.” He glanced over at Spike, who was
listening to them only a few feet away. “Take Spike with you.” She nodded. He watched as
Buffy gathered Spike. They were almost out the door when Buffy looked back.
“Bye, Angel,” she whispered. Then they were
gone. Angel shut the
door and collapsed in his chair. He put his face in his hands, struggling to
block out the world. *********************** Spike had been
out of the law firm since coming back from the dead. But now, leaving with
Buffy, it felt like he was finally breaking free. They rode in a
cab to her hotel. It wasn’t a ritzy place, but it wasn’t that bad either. They
had a pool, cable, and air conditioning. Everything you basically needed for a
comfortable stay. He imagined Rupert had been the one to finance the trip.
There was no way Buffy could pay for a stay like this. Buffy led him
through the hotel. They took the stairs instead of the elevator to third floor.
Identical doors loomed past them as they moved. Suddenly, Buffy stopped in
front of 317. She fumbled in
her purse for the lock-card. “It would be
best for me to wait out here,” Spike voiced. In disbelief,
Buffy turned toward him. “Huh?” “I mean . . .”
He ran a hand through his hair. “It would be best not to give the bit a scare.” “And Willow.
She came with us, and should be watching Dawn,” Buffy added. She nodded. “Okay.
Wait here. I’ll come get you in a few.” She
disappeared into the room, leaving him out in the hall. He leaned against the
wall, desperately wishing he had a cigarette. What was
happening here? He gazed up at the ceiling, as if it would offer an answer. ********************** The room was
quiet and dark. “Will? Dawn?” Buffy flipped
on the light. She surveyed her surroundings. The twin beds were neat and
untouched. She spotted a white piece of paper on the table. Buff, You’ve been
gone a few hours now. We aren’t quite sure when to expect you back, so we
decided not to wait up. We went to catch a late movie Dawn is just dying to
see. We’ll talk
later, cause I know you are going to need some support
after all the Angel-Angst. Lots of
X’s, without the O’s (poor us), Buffy smiled.
Well, Lying the note back down, she headed over to the door. She peeked her head out. “Spike,” she
called. The vampire
came into view. She was again overwhelmed by how much she had missed him. His
mere presence had totally flip-flopped her psyche. She
had never been so excited about the future before. And to think a few days ago
she was practically breaking apart in front of her sister. “ “Right then,”
Spike replied. He stepped inside. Without
speaking, the two sat down on a bed. They were close, but didn’t touch. “Buffy . . .”
Spike began. She raised her
head. “Spike . . .” They reached
for each other. Their mouths crashed together. Hands explored all over. When
Buffy started to undo Spike’s pants, he had to stop her. “Wait,” he
panted. “We need to stop.” Buffy pulled
away, her face flushed. Spike righted
his white jeans. “We have to talk.” “You’re
right,” she agreed. “Do you want to start? Or shall I?” “I wasn’t
going to contact you,” Spike blurted. Her eyes
widened. She gaped. “I was going
to leave you be. Let you have your 2.5 children and all. Seemed
the right thing to do.” “Spike . . .” “I wanted to
find you. I wanted to believe what you said was real. I wanted to get out of that
hell-hole the poof is running and find my piece of heaven. But you deserve
better.” “Okay, now I
think you’ve been hanging around Angel too much!” Buffy was mad. No, furious.
How dare he! How dare he fight for her for years and
then choose to be all noble when she decided to surrender. How dare he! Spike took in
a deep breath. “When you were the slayer we might have had a go at it. But now
you can be just a girl. Isn‘t that what you‘ve always wanted?” Buffy felt her
fire grow larger. “Okay, I’m sick of people acting like they know what I need
and want. First of all, I’ll always be the slayer. It is a part of me. So, that
means I’m not your average girl. Never was, never will be. And even if I were,
I don’t think I’d want it. It’s nice to have a break, yes, but I need to get my
energy out once in a while.” “All I do is
bollocks up your life, Buffy.” Erg, she
wanted to punch him in the nose. She clenched her hand into a fist instead. “Is this your
soul talking?” Buffy questioned. “Because if it is I think I’d prefer to have a
conversation with your demon.” Life sparked
in Spike’s eyes. “The demon is a right selfish git.” Buffy took a
moment to think. Then she cupped his chin. “Spike- William, you’ve told me what
you feel is the right thing to do. Now tell me what you want to do. Right now. At this very moment.” He drew back,
searching her face. “I want . . . I want to feel you.” She took his
hand and placed it on her covered breast. “Like that?” He shook his
head. “I want to feel your skin.” She slid his hand
under her shirt. She wasn’t wearing a bra and she wasn’t embarrassed about it
either. He indrew an involuntary breath. “Like that?” He nodded. “Spike, now
ask me what I want,” she commanded. Spike pulled
his hand away. “Buffy . . .” Frustrated,
she said,” Spike, I think I was falling in love with you before. And I didn’t
tell you I loved you because you were dying. I told you it because I thought it
would save you. I might still have been falling, Spike, but I know in time I
would have hit the bottom.” “Slayer . . .”
There he was.
There was her demon. Buffy leaned
closer. “You’ve been battling for me for years now. I think it’s my turn. Give
in, Spike. You know you want to dance.” His lips
twitched. She was close. “Now, ask me
what ‘I’ want.” “What do you
want, Buffy?” She answered
in a barely audible, husky murmur. “I want you. I want all of you as I take the
final plunge and hit the bottom. I want to take my chances crashing into the
sharp rocks below. Give in Spike.” A smirk formed
on his lips. “I should make you wait three years.” Without
warning, he slammed her against the mattress. “But that would be torture for
the both of us.” She let out a
moan as he massaged her breasts through her sweater. “I thought you
wanted to feel my skin,” she got out. “I do.” His touch
roamed up her bare belly. It was cold against her raging heat. Ah, so good. The door
banged open. “I can’t
believe he didn’t marry her,” came a familiar voice. “Not every
story has a happy ending, Dawn. Sometimes the couple doesn’t end up together.
They go their separate ways or one of them dies,” The slayer and
vampire on the bed froze. “Or. . .
Sometimes they do,” Buffy blushed.
“Hey, guys.” ______________________________________________ Chapter 8 Buffy sat up,
smoothing down her rumpled blue sweater. She exchanged a look with Spike, who
flashed her a smirk. “Um . . .”
Buffy bit her lip. “We can explain.” “Ya see . . .” Spike began, but didn’t know where to start. “He’s back,”
Buffy continued. “He showed up at Wolfram and Hart.” “Came out of that blasted amulet of Angel’s. Was all ghosty, but now I’m a real boy again,” he finished. Gaping, “Thanks, Red.
It‘s good to be seen.” There was a
moment of silence. No one moved. Buffy noticed how frightened her sister
looked. “Dawnie?” Buffy asked in
concern. The teen’s
head shot up, startled. She backed up until she hit
the wall. She closed her eyes. After a moment she opened them again. Her breath
caught. “Sp-Spike,
you’re. . . Are you real?” Spike stood
up. He took a tentative step toward her. “Nibblet?” A sob escaped
Dawn. She rushed at him, arms flying. She hit him full-force, embracing him
harshly. He held her back, stroking her silky hair. “I’m so
sorry,” she cried. She repeated the apology over and over. Spike’s hand
stilled. He met Buffy’s gaze with puzzlement. She mouthed, ’Fire’ and ‘bed.’
Suddenly he understood. “Aw, Dawn, I’m
not sore about the fire bit. You had a right to be angry.” She lifted her
head, wetness streaming down her cheeks. “I didn’t mean it,“
she choked. “I’d never really hurt you.“ The vampire
reached out and brushed the tears away. He gave her a loving smile. All of a sudden
Dawn burst out laughing. She tightened her hold. “We missed you.” “Missed my girls as well.” Spike glanced at Buffy as he said this.
He held out a welcoming hand. The slayer came forward, joining the group hug. *********************** “So, after the
grand poof himself very graciously asked us to push
off, your big sis invited me to accompany her here so we could talk,” Spike
finished. Dawn fought rolling
her eyes. Yeah right, she thought. Talk. Inwardly she laughed. That was no
conversation “Well, I’m
glad Giles found that prophecy. Otherwise we never would have came to LA.” Spike lifted
an eyebrow. “What is this prophecy?” Just then
Buffy came out of the bathroom. She ran her fingers through her golden locks
and let out a yawn. Dawn shrugged.
“Buffy knows more than I do.” “Is that
right?” Spike’s attention shifted to land on the slayer. “Huh? What?”
Buffy inquired. “This prophecy. What is it?” “Oh.” Buffy
let out another yawn. “Just some prophecy about Angel getting
a reward. Some ’light shining from above’. Something like
that. Spike shot to
his feet. He began to pace the room. “I can’t believe this!” “Huh?” Buffy
sounded very confused. Spike stopped.
He gestured with his hands as he spoke. “He already has ‘one’ prophecy. He
doesn’t need another bloody one too!” He put his hand up to his heart. “And what about me? I’m the one who went and got a soul
willingly. Hey, who’s to say these destiny texts aren’t about me?” Buffy pondered
that for a minute. She frowned. “They could be,” she said slowly. “Giles
immediately concluded it had to be about Angel because you were . . . gone.” “Ah hah! Angel acts all high and mighty, thinking he is the chosen
one. When all along I could be the one to get the beating
heart.” “What?” Dawn
squeaked. “Whoa, wait.
Beating heart? Human?” Buffy got in. Spike nodded. “The Shanshu prophecy. A vampire
with a soul will do some brilliant deed and be rewarded with humanity.” Buffy’s head
reeled. The thought of Angel or Spike becoming human was a lot to take in.
Buffy teetered. Her hand shot out and met the wall for support. Dawn jumped
up. “Buffy!?” The world
spun. Buffy opened and closed her eyes a few times, trying to focus. Spike came
forward and swooped her up. He brought Buffy over to
the bed and laid her down. He ran a hand over her, looking for anything to
indicate the unexpected dizziness. “What is the
matter, luv?” Spike asked. “I - I don’t
know. I suddenly felt strange.” She swallowed. “I feel better now.” He stared at
her for awhile. Then he said, “Rest.” She nodded,
scooting over. “Join me?” He climbed in
under the sheets. She spooned herself against his body, wanting as much contact
as possible. “I’m gonna . . .” Dawn pointed to the door. “ Spike nodded,
giving her a thankful smile. He knew what she was up to and was grateful for
it. He put his head down after Dawn left, listening to an already slumbering
Buffy breath. ********************* A couple hours
later Spike awoke. He felt the slayer stir. “Buffy?” She clutched
onto him. “Oh God!” she exclaimed. “What is it?” Buffy buried
her face in his chest. “Oh God,” she mumbled. “I dreamt. . .” Her voice caught.
He kissed the
top of her head. “It’s okay, Buffy. I’m here.” “Don’t leave
me.” She looked up at him. The room was dark, but with his vampiric
sight he could see the pleading in her eyes. “Never leave me.” “Buffy . . .”
He sighed. “I’m not going anywhere.” Buffy glanced
over at the other bed. It was untouched, perfectly made. “Where’s Dawn?” “She went over
to see “Oh.” Their eyes
met. “Spike.” His name came out breathily. She trailed her fingers down
his shirt. Sitting up a
little, he grabbed her roaming hand. “This might not be a wise idea. We don’t
know what made you dizzy. Are you sure you’re all right?” “I’m fine,”
she assured him. “I think I was just tired.” “Buff-” She silenced
him with her soft lips. She tugged on his white t-shirt. He couldn’t help but
let out a moan. All thoughts of Buffy’s ’almost fainting spell’ left him. ************************* Angel reread
the paragraph again. It didn’t help. He couldn’t get the words to sink in.
Frustrated, he shoved the file away. He leaned
back, rubbing his temples. He couldn’t concentrate. Images of Buffy and Spike
kept running through his head. That epiphany before didn’t seem to be helping
the situation any. He still wanted Buffy. And he definitely couldn’t stand to
think of her choosing Spike over him. Maybe he
should call it a night and go to bed. If he could bring himself to sleep that
is. A ring jolted
him from his thoughts. He grabbed the phone and put the receiver to his ear. “Angel speaking.” “Hello, this
is Kate from the infirmary ward.” Angel
straightened. “Yes, Kate. How can I help you?” “That patient
you were curious about. . . Well, he . . . died twenty minutes ago.” Angel took in
a long breath. “I see.” “He fell into
a coma earlier today. Then his heart simply stopped. We tried to revive him but
nothing worked.” “I understand,
Kate. Thank you for informing me. I suggest sending the body to the lab for a
dissection.” “All right.” “Is that all,
Kate?” “Not quite.”
The doctor paused. “That woman you came to see earlier. . .” Angel froze.
He clutched the phone tighter. “What about her?” Oh God, Cordy, he thought with fright. He didn’t know if he could
handle her death right now. “She’s . . .
Well, she’s awake.” Angel bolted
out of his chair. “I’ll be right there.” Without
waiting for a reply, Angel slammed the phone down. He hurried out of his office
without hesitating for a second. ____________________________________________________ Chapter 9 Resembling a
wild mad man, Angel made his way through Wolfram and Hart. He didn’t slow down
until he saw Kate. She stood outside Cordelia’s room,
jotting down a few things. She glanced up at him when she heard him approach. “How is she?”
Angel asked. “She’s fine. A
little confused, but that is to be expected. Would you like to see her?” Why else would
he come down here? “Yes,” he
answered. “Don’t
overwhelm her,” the doctor advised. He nodded,
reaching to open the door. The first thing that hit him was the smell of Cordy. Her scent had always been there when he visited, but
it was accompanied with the stench that only a hospital could produce. That
medicine aroma that made a person shiver
involuntarily. That was gone now, and the whole room was filled with the rich
perfume of flowers. His eyes
landed on the bed, where she sat. She was very still, and was staring straight
at him, but didn’t seem to notice his presence. He felt his chest tighten. The
doctor said she was all right. She didn’t look all right. She looked catatonic,
although with her eyes open. Angel slowly
moved to her side. He took a hand and laid it on her bare arm. “Cordelia?” And then she
came out of her little world. She blinked, and then gradually brought her head
around to face him. Her voice came out low and hoarse,”
Angel?” A giant grin
spread across his features. “Yeah.” He hugged her.
“Oh, Cordy, we were afraid you would never wake up.” She didn’t
respond, and he grew worried. Something wasn’t right here. He pulled back. He
saw the despair seeping out of her. “Is there
something wrong?” Cordelia put her face in her hands. She was silent for a long
time. Angel watched her, at a loss with what to do. Finally, she
lifted her head. She met his dark eyes. “It’s started,” she told him. *********************** Wolfram and
Hart was at rest, but if it had been during the day there would have been a
mass of activity. Fred hurriedly walked down the hall, searching for her
friends. They were practically the only ones who stayed for late hours, except
for the essential staff in the medical department. She finally
bumped into Gunn. He was coming out of his office, straightening his tie. “Hey, Fred,”
he greeted. “I was just heading home.” “Charles, I
don’t think you should be leaving just yet. H-Have you seen the news?” the
scientist commented. “No, why?” Fred grabbed
his arm and pulled him back into his office. She went over to the television
that was imbedded into the wall. She flipped through the channels, showing him
how every single one displayed the ‘Breaking News’. She pointed to
the screen. “That’s why.” The news was
talking about a huge blizzard. Then he caught the location. “What?” Gunn
mumbled. “Yes, Gunn gaped at
the TV. He watched footage displaying some sick children in “Uh . . . Yeah.” ************************* “I think it is
safe for you to go back now, Dawnie,” “You’re
probably right. But I don’t want to walk in on something gross.” “Oh, yeah.” “Here, I’ll go
with you.” The two exited
the hotel room. They were almost to the room Buffy and Spike were in when the
door shot open. Spike came out, carrying an unconscious Buffy. “Oh my God!” Spike raised
his head, startled. “She won’t wake up!” He was in a fluster, lost and scared. “All right,” “What?” “Put her down
on the floor.” Spike seemed
doubtful, but complied. With great care, he laid his love down on the blue
carpet. Dawn hovered over them, hugging herself. “It isn’t
something physical. It’s paranormal.” “A spell?” Dawn asked. “N-No.
Something . . .” Okay, that was
it. Spike couldn’t hear anymore. He took action, hoisting Buffy back into his
arms. “We have to
get her to the hospital,” he announced. “They won’t
know what to do,” Dawn stated. “ “Not the
public hospital, bit. The Wolfram and Hart hospital.” __________________________________________________ Chapter 10 Cordelia perked up. She swung her legs over the side of the metal
bed. On shaky legs, she made her way to the door. “What’s
started? Cordelia?” Angel asked. She didn’t
answer. Instead, ignoring his inquisition, she headed out into the hall. The
sound of desperate shouting filled the air. “Hullo, I have
a girl ‘ere who needs help!” The
dark-haired vampire came up behind the seer. They watched as Spike entered the
hall, carrying the small form of Buffy. After a few seconds, Dawn and Angel took a
step forward. “Buffy? What’s wrong with her?” Spike shook
his head. “Don’t know. She won’t wake up.” The blonde glanced around,
distracted. “Is there anyone here?” Footsteps
approached. The next thing they knew Kate came into view. She rushed into
action, instructing for Spike to follow her into an examining room. Tears streamed
down Dawn’s face as she saw her sister get taken away. “She’s going
to be all right. She’s Buffy,” Dawn said, trying to convince herself.
“Slayers have super-healing powers.” Cordelia’s eyes widened. “H-Hi, All attention
fell on the newly awakened patient. She ran a hand through her hair. “Geez, staring much. Am I a mess
or something?” The comment
filled Angel with relief. Now that was the Cordelia
he knew. “You look
fine,” “She just woke
up,” he said. “From a coma.” All of a
sudden Fred and Gunn came running at them. They slowed, catching their breath. “Angel, we’ve
been searching for you. We’ve got a problem,” Gunn got out. Everything was
overwhelming Angel. He felt like he might pass out if things didn’t stop to
give him a breather. Which was ridiculous for two reasons.
One, vampires don’t faint. Two, vampires don’t breath. “Cordelia!” Fred shrieked. She
rammed into her friend, giving her a hug. Hesitantly, Cordelia
reciprocated the act. “Whoa, Cordy!” Gunn exclaimed,
noticing the reanimated woman as well. “Fred. . .” Cordy began. “Can I have some air?” Fred backed
up. “Oh-Sure. Sorry.” Cordelia’s eyes swept over everyone. She swayed a little, which
caused Angel to reach out and grab her. “Are you
okay?” Angel questioned. Cordelia looked up at him. Her eyes swam with agony. “No.” She
shook her head. “I can’t . . . There’s so many
images.” “Visions?” She winced. “I
can feel them. Everyone. The whole world is
crumbling.” Angel parted
his lips. “I think she’s
on the right wavelength, Angel. Fred and I just watched the news.” Gunn pointed
behind him. “It’s chaos out there. Natural disasters. . . But
not so natural. Meteors. Mysterious
illnesses.” “Mysterious illness?” Gunn turned. “Yeah.” “Oh, God, Buffy!” Cordelia started to tremble. Angel swooped
her up. “Come on, I’m going to take you somewhere you can rest,” he told her.
Then he addressed the others. “I’ll be back.” He took her to
his office. It was refreshing to see it empty and silent. The couch awaited
them, and he lay her gingerly down. She gazed up with glazed eyes. “I don’t know
what to do. They need me to do something,” she choked. Stroking back
her hair, he soothingly replied. “Are the powers sending you visions?” She nodded.
“It’s never been like this before. They came right before I woke up. I. . .”
She paused to take in a deep breath. “I can’t even sort them out.” He leaned down
and pressed his lips to her forehead. “It’ll be all right. Just
rest.” It seemed like
she might protest, but after a moment she complied. She sighed, shutting her
eyes and sinking into the cushions. *********************** The
examination was inconclusive. There was nothing found to indicate that the
slayer should be sick. Spike staid by her side for hours, set
on being there for her every second. “Do you need
something to eat?” Dawn asked the next morning. “Thanks,
platelet, but I’m fine. You go get yourself something tasty, though,” he said,
brushing the offer aside. “But . . .”
She sighed. “All right.” Dawn left, and
Spike found himself alone with Buffy. He watched her, paying close attention to
the rise and fall of her chest. There was a heart monitor hooked up, giving off
steady beeping noises, but actually seeing air pass through her lungs was more
reassuring. Spike took
Buffy’s hand. He rubbed his thumb across her soft skin. “Okay, pet,
I’m not gonna let you do this,” he firmly said. “The
two of us agreed to have ourselves a go only last night. Wouldn’t
be right for you to back out.” Against his
will Spike drifted off, still clinging to his slayer’s hand. Awhile later he
was jarred awake by a twitch. His head jolted up. “Spike?” The voice was groggy. “Buffy?” Her eyes
fluttered half-way open. He laughed, bringing her hand up to kiss it. “Hey there,
cutie,” he voiced. She gave him
her best attempt at a smile. “Should I get
the doc?” “No.” Her words were
so soft, as if she could hardly find the strength to get them out. If it wasn’t
for his vampiric hearing he might not have been able
to catch them. “I think they
should know you’re awake, luv,” Spike advised. “No.” She
squeezed his fingers. “I wanna spend time with just
you.” He relaxed in
his seat. “Buffy, how do
you feel? The docs have no idea what is making you sick. If you know anything
-” She shook her
head. “It feels like I’m being swallowed.” Widening his
blue eyes, he said, “What?” She closed her
eyes. “Yeah. Strange, huh?” “Angel’s crew think you might be tied in with some apocalyptic
happenings.” She let out a
sound that he detected as laughter. “Darn apocalypses.” “Don’t worry.
We’ll fix it. It’s what we white hats do. Then everything will be right as
rain, and you’ll be good as new.” “I really
think the docs should be fetched.” He began to get up. She tugged him back. “Spike!” Her eyes opened. Spike froze. “Shhh. What is it, luv?” “There’s
something I need to say.” “All ears,
slayer.” “I’ve figured
it out.” “Bout what?” “You.” He raised his left
eyebrow. “Me?” “Yeah. And me. Us.” “Really? And what final conclusion did you come up with?” “That I’m in
love with you,” she murmured. His lips rose.
“That so? That’s mighty convenient considering I’m in
love with you.” She weakly
smiled back. “Kiss me and then I’ll let you go get the doctor.” Spike lowered
his mouth down to hers. They touched with warmth, savoring the merging of their
tongues. After a long while, they reluctantly separated. “Be right
back,” Spike told her. He turned,
prepared to exit the room. He wasn’t really surprised to find his grandsire
standing in the open doorway. “Why hullo
there, peaches, enjoy the show?” Angel scowled.
A smirk formed
on Spike’s face. He pushed his way past the other vamp. It wasn’t difficult for
him to find a doctor. When he brought the man back, however, Buffy had been
pulled back into unconsciousness. ************************ “Spike, can I
have a moment?” Spike looked
over with red eyes. He nodded, not in the mood to banter. He ventured out into
the hall. He leaned against the doorframe to Buffy’s room. “Have on with
it,” Spike said. “Eve contacted
the senior partners.” “Really? What did the wankers have to
say?” There was a
span of silence. “They think it has to do with the both of us,” Angel eventually
said. “Right,” Spike
drolled. “I don’t know about you, mate, but I haven’t
been going around giving myself a tickle by creating massive destruction.” “They think
it’s the soul issue,” Angel deadpanned. Spike’s jaw
twitched. He took a moment to glance at the motionless Buffy through the open
door. “You really
think we did that to her?” Angel ran a
hand through his gelled locks. “I don’t know.” “Is there a
way to fix it?” “The senior
partners are working on it.” Spike hit the
back of his head against the wall. “Call them back up and tell them to bloody
hurry it along, will ya.” His hands formed into
fists. “Because if anything happens to my girl there’s going to be blood shed. More than any Armageddon could dish out.” ________________________________________________ Chapter 11 The world
stopped at a little past The shrill
constant beep exploded in their ears. And they
watched. The
defibrillator jolted Buffy’s body as electric currents swept through her. “Clear!” “Time?” “Two minutes,
fifty-one seconds.” Two minutes
and fifty-one seconds of oblivion. “Up twenty. .
. Clear!” Spike couldn’t
see. There was only darkness. A frigid blanket had draped itself over him. And
his ears had gone deaf. There was nothing. He didn’t hear
the catch in the flat line. The long drone came back, but there had been a
pause. “Again.” The paddles
shot energy into the slayer. She jerked off the bed. “Clear.” Over and over. It never seemed to end. And then. . . “We have a
pulse!” Four minutes,
fifteen seconds. Four minutes and fifteen seconds after the world stopped it
started again. Dawn shook her
favorite vampire. He looked like a zombie, which wasn’t far off, but very
disturbing. “Spike?” He made no
response. “Spike? Did you hear? They have a pulse. Buffy’s
back.” Everything
came rushing back. His vision cleared, his ears filtered in the sound waves,
and the blanket lifted. Spike sunk to
his knees. Dawn came down with him and wrapped her arms around him. Spike, William
the Bloody, slayer of slayers, cried in the embrace of a sixteen year-old. ********************** Spike sat on
the floor outside his love’s door. He couldn’t bring himself to go inside yet.
He was still recovering from almost losing her. “So, I hear
you’re a good guy now. How‘s that going for you?” He rose his blue eyes to land on Cordelia.
She came over and sat down beside him. “Mmm, for being carpet it’s pretty comfy.” Spike stared
down at his hands. “So, I hear you’re all with the visions. How’s that going
for you?” She shrugged.
“You’d think being half demon it’d be a piece of cake.” He rose an eyebrow at that. “Don’t ask. Yeah, half demon here. The migraines are gone, but that
doesn’t mean I welcome them.” He offered a
nod. “I’ve been
getting a lot since waking up. They were a jumbled mess at first, but now
they’re more clear. Still not a
picnic.” His blue eyes
met her brown ones. They were filled with plead. “Any that might help Buffy?” “One thing
about the damned PTBs, they love to show what is
wrong, but they’re not big on giving solutions.” She let out a humorless laugh.
“It is so uncool how we have to clean up their mess.” They sat
together in silence. ************************ Spike didn’t
bother to knock. He burst into Angel’s office, making the other vampire lift
his head from his hands. “Any news from the senior blokes?” Spike asked. Angel
straightened. “No.” “Right then.” The blonde
reached into his duster pocket. When his hand emerged it held a wooden stake. “I’ve been
thinking. . .” “Never a good
thing, William,” Angel commented. His grandchilde was about to make a comeback, but stopped
himself. He fumbled with the stake. “There are the
two of us.” Spike gestured between them. “And there should only be just the
one. So, if one of us was eliminated. . .” A frown spread
across Angel‘s face. “What are you getting at?” Spike handed
over the stake. He gripped the edge of the desk and leaned slightly forward.
“I’m askin you to kill me.” Angel should
have jumped at the chance. It was his opportunity to be rid of the annoying bleach-wonder.
Instead he set the stake down. Then he looked up. Calmly, Angel
said, “No.” “What!?” Spike let go of the desk. “I’m askin
you to off me. It’s your biggest dream. Think about it. You’ll be the only
candidate for that Shanshu prophecy. And Buffy’ll need someone.” “Why are you
doing this, Spike?” “Because it’s the only way! I just overheard some docs discussing
Buffy’s condition. There is nothin they can do for
her.” Spike let out a long breath. “And it isn’t only her, although she’s a
large chunk of it. I’ve been thinkin about the other
billion people outside the window. So, I’m askin
again, ‘Kill me?’. A few seconds
passed. “No,” Angel answered. Spike hit his
fist down on the top of the desk. He growled. He snatched up the stake. “Fine, I’ll do
it myself!” He began to
stalk out of the room, prepared to find a private place for his end. He was
halted by Angel. The elder vampire slammed him against the door. “Can’t let you
do it, Spike,” Angel said, slipping into game face. “And why the bleeding hell not!?” Spike shouted. “Because she loves you.” Angel’s features shifted back to human. He
took in a deep breath. “Because she loves ‘you’.” Angel released
Spike. He took a step back. With steady hands, he began to unbutton his dark
shirt. Then he offered his bare chest. “Do it.” Spike gawked
in surprise. But he didn’t move. “Do it!” Angel
repeated. Spike raised
the weapon. “I never liked
you much, Angel. But I. . . I never hated you.
Sometimes I even admired you. Kinda like right now.” “Spike. . .
Take care of her.” “Course.” And with that,
Spike aimed. He thrust the stake, hitting its target swift and true. Angel only
had time to enlarge his eyes and open his mouth before disintegrating. The
stake fell from Spike’s hands, landing next to the pile of dust on the floor. ______________________________________________________ Epilogue Spike and
Buffy were huddled together on the hospital bed. The slayer’s head rested on
his still chest, while his fingers streamed through her hair. They both were silent,
staring across the room at nothing. The tears had
already came and went, and Buffy couldn’t bring
herself to find anymore. Numbness had set in. She couldn’t believe he was gone.
A world without Angel seemed like a scary world indeed. “Do you need
anything, luv?” The words felt
like ice. After such a long span of quiet it didn’t hit well. She shook her
head. It wasn’t long
before there was a knock at the door. “Come in,”
Spike called. The door
opened and Cordelia slowly entered. She gave them both
a smile. It wasn’t a bright one, but it wasn’t sad either. “I had a
vision,” she announced. Spike shut his
eyes. He wasn’t ready to go off and play champion just yet. “It was of
Angel.” He felt Buffy
sit up. “What?” Cordy’s eyes shimmered. Her smile wobbled. “He’s happy.” “Happy,” Buffy
repeated. Then a smile tugged at her lips. “He will face
the coming darkness, sacrifice himself for the greater good, and receive a
reward.” A tear escaped Buffy’s eye. She quickly brushed it away. “Light from
above. Heaven. He’s finally done.” Spike brought
her closer and rested his chin on the top of her head. “Thanks, Cordelia,” he said to the seer. ************************* Angel had been
carrying around torment for so long he had forgotten what it was like to be free
of it. For years he had only known darkness, desperately seeking the light. And
now he had finally found it. His journey
was finished. He was complete. And he was forgiven. ________________________________________________ The End. |
