Mood: flirty
Now Playing: The Blower's Daughter -- Damien Rice
Sex is a funny thing. Well, sometimes it can be comical, but I'm not even referring to that. I mean, sex can be casual or breathtakingly momentous, a way to blow off steam or a way to connect, and it can bring two people closer or further apart.
I used to dream of having sex with only one man in my entire life, and so I saved myself for Mr. Right. Well, shit happens. And Mr. Right can turn out to be Mr. Not-Right-At-All. And yet, a part of me still wishes the dream were a possibility. Wouldn't it be amazing to have that knowledge, that the only person who has known your beloved intimately is you?
Numbers. I once made a list of all the men I'd had sex with, and let me tell you, it was somewhat surprising. I'm not a skank, and even at my skankiest, I had some standards, yet the number was somewhat alarming. What made it even worse was the realization that I was still single, and that meant the list would grow even more.
Why did this even bother me? I was raised Catholic, but I've been away from the Church over a decade now, and I have a healthy enjoyment of sex. It's fun, it's exercise, and you can do it in almost any mood. You're happy? Have sex. Sad? Sex. Mad? Sex. Horny? Lots of sex.
But sex gets you in trouble, and I'm not just referring to infidelity. No, the sex you had five years ago with your then-girlfriend could cause a problem with your new girlfriend today. Why do we do it to ourselves? I've done it myself. I've asked how many partners my ex had before me, and his answer disappointed and even angered me. I felt less special, as if his having been with someone before me meant he didn't really love me, or some nonsense like that. I asked what he liked, and his telling me somehow made me picture his doing those things with other women, and I hated those images.
So I've learned my lesson, thanks, in part, to some experience, and in part, to a friend of mine. He's had sex with only three women. What a coincidence. I've had sex with only three men.
Posted by Holly
at 10:48 PM PDT
Updated: Monday, 3 October 2005 12:02 PM PDT
Post Comment | View Comments (1) | Permalink | Share This Post
Updated: Monday, 3 October 2005 12:02 PM PDT
Post Comment | View Comments (1) | Permalink | Share This Post