The end of an era...
Mood:
spacey
Now Playing: I'm Still Here -- Johnny Rzeznik
So, here we are, three days from 2006, and I've decided to take a moment to reflect on my recent past.
Three semesters of school in a row, for starters. That's a first. I've earned my associate's degree and am entering my junior year at SDSU. I finally settled on a major: finance.
I've been single for over six months, and normally, this would the time when I'd be looking in earnest, but I really don't feel like dating. I want to focus on myself for a while.
And on that subject, I'm preparing for an honest effort to lose some weight. I don't have any health problems (yet), but my self-esteem is plunging, and I really do intend to conquer the Mud Run. Besides, I'm curious to see what I'll look like thin. And act like. I remember when I went from 296 to 220, my personality changed just as much as my body did.
Greg's gone. I don't know if he's alive or dead, and I wonder that nearly everyday, even after all this time, but I'm accepting that maybe I'll never know. And I'm trying to forgive him for that. Holding any resentment or anger toward him hurts no one but myself.
2005 marked the first year I've spent every major holiday without family. That was harder than I thought it would be, despite being surrounded by friends.
Friends. What makes a friend? This year I loosely defined the word, and my definition eliminated half of my acquintances from my friends list. It's about the emotional connection more than anything else. Time spent together doesn't define friendship. Brian, we've only spent a couple of hours together this past year, but you're still a friend. Duane, we've spent way too much time together, and well...it's too much. We're not really friends. Whether we've met in class on a Wednesday night or at the beach on a Saturday morning, I'm so happy to have such wonderful friends, even if I don't have as many as I thought. In friendship, quality matters ever so much more than quantity.
To everyone who loves me, thank you. Thank you just for spending time with me this past year, and watch for the changes in the coming year. They will astound you.