This was found in the Sparks Spring 1999 NASC Newsletter. Written by Tony Goolsby-Werner, Millard North.
Don't ever get you speedometer confused with your clock, like I did once, because the faster you go the later you think you are.
You know how to paint your room real fast? Just put paint rollers on your feet and somehow figure out how to skate up the walls and across the ceilings.
If I was the head of a country that lost a war, and I had to sign a peace treaty, just as I was signing I'd glance over the treaty and then suddenly act surprised. "Wait a minute! I thought WE won!"
Broken promises don't upset me. I just think, why did they believe me?
Most of the time it was probably real bad being stuck down in a dungeon. But some days, when there was a bad storm outside, you'd look out your little window and think, "Boy, I'm glad I'm not out in that!"
I think a good scene in a movie would be where one scientist tells another scientist, "You know what will save the world? You're holding it in you hand," and the other scientist looks and in his hand are some peanuts. Then when he looks up the other scientist is being taken away to the insane asylum.
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