<b>Heather's Hanson Story</b>
Dear Heather,
Hey. How's everything going up there? It must be great,
especially since there's no crying. That's sure different from what it's
been like down here. It's been really hard for me, and the rest of the
family. Mackie is having an especially hard time, and I don't' know if he
really grasps the concept that you're gone. I think that he thinks that
any moment you're gonna come back and hug him. And Heather, sometimes I
think the exact same thing. I keep asking myself why God had to take you,
but I guess that it's all part of His perfect plan for you. You always
tried to find the best out of every situation, but I haven't found one yet
for this one. It all happened so fast. It was like one moment you were
here smiling and laughing, and the next you were gone. It's all kind of
a blur of what really happened, but this is how I remember it:
Me, you, Isaac, and Zac were all in the backyard playing a game of
soccer when you just suddenly collapsed in the middle of the lawn. At fist
I thought that you were just playing a joke on us, and so I just said,
"Heather, this isn't funny, get up!" When you didn't get up I went over to
you and when I didn't feel a pulse I yelled for Isaac to call 911. I put
my head on your chest and listened for a heart beat and when I didn't hear
one, I did CPR. I was so sure that you would just wake up and everything
would be back to normal. It seemed like forever until the ambulance came,
and when it finally did, I got to ride in the back with you. I cried for
about the 4th time in my life, and I talked to you the whole way. I told
you that once you got out of the hospital we would celebrate your 14th
birthday and then in August we'd start our next tour that you were so
looking forward to. I laid a kiss on your forehead, and I almost expected
you to lean forward and kiss me back. You opened your eyes for a quick
second, and I told you that I loved you. I don't know if you heard me, but
I'm sure that you already knew. We finally made it to the hospital and you
were rushed to the emergency room. You were in there for what seemed like
forever, and then the doctor came out and said, "She's gone." He siad it
so simply like it was nothing, but my whole world crumbled with just that
one sentence. He said that one of us could go see you, and since mom was
hysterical, and dad was trying to comfort her, I went. You looked so
peaceful, lying on the operating table, and I reached down to take your
hand. I expected it to be cold and limp, but it felt like it always had:
Warm and full of energy. I squeezed your hand, and I thought I saw you
smile, and for an instant I thought that you were just in a deep sleep,
and would wake up any minute. I kissed you again on the forehead, and
then the doctor came in and told me that I had to leave. I asked him what
had happened, and he said that your heart had just suddenly stopped.
He said that it was a very odd occurrence, but you know Heather, You
never really did things the same as everyone else. You always had to be
different. As I walked out of the operating room, I took one last look at
you and tears streamed down my cheeks. Isaac was waiting for me and he put
his arm around me and said, "You know, you're not the only one who's gonna
miss her." I knew then that none of us were ever going to forget you.
Your funeral was held two days later which was July 1st. There
were tons of roses, and just looking at them reminded me of the first time
we kissed. It was the day when you were picking roses and the Rottweiler
attacked you. I remember that day like it was yesterday. The softness of
your lips, you softly saying that you loved me, everything. Isaac, Zac, and
I wee supposed to sing With You in Your Dreams, but we couldn't go through
with it, so they just played the recording. Tears welled up in my eyes, and
as I leaned over to take one last look at you, my tears fell on your cheeks.
I kissed you for the last time, and I can't even express all of the
emotions that I was feeling. We got home, and I cried my eyes out. I didn't
know how I was gonna make it without you. I went straight to our room, and
just looked at your unmade bed. I remember you telling me that you never
made your bed because you were planning to sleep in it that night. *Smile*
The worse thought that went through my head was, "She's not gonna sleep
there tonight." Isaac came in along with Zac, and both of their eyes were
red and puffy. I knew then that they had been crying too. We all sat on my
bed and cried together. That night as I laid in bed trying to fall asleep,
I heard your voice softly say, "How much do you love me Tay?" "I love you
forever and a day, Heather." I replied quietly. I then asked you how much
you loved me as we always had done every night since you lived with us, and
I heard you whisper, "I love you forever and a day, Tay." I put my head in
my pillow and cried for the rest of the night.
Heather, nothing's been the same at all. Memories keep replaying in
my mind, and I don't want them to ever be forgotten. The thing that I guess
I'll always remember is how you always used to throw back your head and
laugh at my jokes. You were like the only one who laughed at them. *Smile*
Remember the time when we both got our ears pierced? You squeezed my hand
so hard, and just thinking about it makes my hand hurt. *Smile* The
Albertane tour was like the best tour ever! You and Zac together were like
the only energy on the bus. I'll never forget the time when we went to the
karoke bar and you and Zac sung Everybody (Backstreet's Back) That was so
funny! I don't know how you and Zac knew the dance steps, but it was
especially funny since there's five of them and only two of you. There's
so many crazy things that we all did together it's amazing. Just looking
back at them all makes me laugh. Today Isaac was humming the chorus of More
Than Anything, and it really made me think. I mean I would "Give anything
and everything I have just to be with you." Just for a minute. Just enough
time to tell me that everything's gonna be all right, and you're never gonna
leave me. I know that God's always gonna be here for me, but it's just not
the same. I don't know how I'm gonna make it without you. You were too
young to die Heather. You were only 13! You still had your whole life
ahead of you. What about becoming an orthodontist? Now how am I going to
get my teeth straightened? *Smile* What about getting married? Having
children? I love you so much Heather, and there are no words to express
how I feel right now. There's so much left to say, but not enough time.
You're a constant reminder how we really need to enjoy our life right now
because life is so short. Too short. I'll always love you, and never
forget you, I promise.
Love forever and a day,
Taylor
Up soon, the next part of this story. Sorry it is taking so long for me
to put it up. School you know. Well it will be up soon. Sorry again...
~~~Cindy~~~
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