Really Drunk
A fellow decides to take off early from work
and go drinking. He stays until the bar
closes at 2am, at which time he is extremely
drunk. When he enters his house, he doesn't
want to wake anyone, so he takes off his
shoes and starts tip-toeing up the stairs.
Half-way up
the
stairs, he falls over backwards and lands
flat on his rear end.
That wouldn't have been so bad, except that
he had couple of empty pint bottles in his
back pockets, and they broke, and the broken
glass carved up his buttocks terribly. But,
he was so drunk that he didn't know he was
hurt. A few minutes later, as he was
undressing, he noticed blood, so he checked
himself out in the mirror, and, sure enough,
his behind was cut up something terrible.
Well, he repaired the
damage
as
best he could under the circumstances, and he
went to bed.
The next morning, his head was hurting, and
his rear was hurting, and he was hunkering
under the covers trying to think up some good
story, when his wife came into the bedroom.
"Well, you really tied one on last night,"
she said. "Where'd you go?"
"I worked late," he said, "and I stopped off
for a couple of beers."
"A couple of beers? That's a laugh," she
replied. "You got plastered last night. Where
the heck did you go?"
"What makes you so sure I got drunk last
night, anyway?"
"Well," she replied, "my first big clue was
when I got up this morning and found a bunch
of band-aids stuck to the mirror."
