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You know that you have lived in the Middle East too long when..


* You enjoy camping in the sand.
* You expect the confirmation of your airline reservation to.
be "inshallah" (God willing).
* You don't expect to eat dinner until 10:30 PM.
* You need a sweater when it's 80 degrees Fahrenheit.
* You expect everyone to own a mobile phone.
* Your idea of housework is leaving a list for the house maid.
* You understand "mafi mushkla" "no problem" means follow up.
* You think a picnic means pulling over on the side of the.
road with your TV and water pipe.
* You believe that speed limits are only advisory.
* You expect to go to jail when a local national hits the back
of your car at a stop sign.
* You wear a jacket inside and take it off when you go out.
* You think shopping malls are covered souqs.
* You can judge a perfect "10" by the ankle.
* You think carpets belong on the wall.
* You turn up the air conditioning to write Christmas Cards.
* You know which end of a shawarma to unwrap first.
* You think the further you inch into the middle of the
intersection, the faster the light will turn green.
* You believe that the definition of a nanosecond is the time
interval between the time the light turns green and the time
that the guy behind you begins to blow his horn.
* You think a red light means run it.
* You think only men should hold hands in public.
* You can't buy anything without asking for a discount.
* You have more carpets than floor space.
* You make left turns from the far right lane.
* You expect gold for every birthday.
* You think Pepsi begins with a "B".
* You think the uncut version of "Little House on the
Prairie"is provocative.

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Jamal Khayat(C)1999...SA Corp.

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