1.It will always be your party.
2.You get screwed when you least expect it.
3.You can always change your running mate.
4.Politics will still be there in the morning.
5.Politics will continue to screw you months after you've made a serious mistake.
6.Politics prefers that you come on strong.
7.You can give up politics without going through "the bends."
8.Discussing your political life won't embarrass you.
9.It's alright to politic in public.
10.It's easier to politic standing up.
11.Nobody attacks your manhood because you can't politic.
12. You don't have to campaign for what you want every single night.
13.Everybody prefers it if you politic briefly.
14.You can get into bed with many politicians at once.
15.Politics doesn't give you A.I.D.S. or herpes.
16.Once you get in, you get to stay for at least two years.
17.You don't feel guilty after politics.
18.Politics is forgiving of one bad showing (Especially if it was in Iowa).
19.You can sell your politics without being arrested.
20.You can easily politic with anyone regardless of race, sex or marital status.
21.Nobody laughs if your shorter than your running mate.
22.You can stop to answer the phone during politics.
23.It's alright to fall asleep during politics.
24.Thinking about politics doesn't give you a boner.
25.It's easy to keep your political preference in the closet.
26.There are no pretensions of honesty in politics.
27.You always know how well you've done in politics.
28. It doesn't matter if your child walks in during politics.
29.You can enjoy a snack during politics.
30.When was the last time you heard of a prostitute being drummed out of a cat house in a political scandal?
31.It's easy for a man to fake enjoying politics.
32.Adolescents don't lie awake at night, worrying about politics.
33.Political success is nationally recognized.
34.Politics prefers it if you come straight to a point.
35.There is no such thing as being "too big" in politics.
36.Politics doesn't strain the cardio-vascular system.
37.You generally don't get tied up during politics.
38.Whips went out of style in 1865.
39.Politicing on the floor doesn't get splinters in your ass.
40.At least you aren't sticky after you've blown it.
41.People are more forgiving of political naiveté'.
42.Priests aren't sworn to give up politics.
43.You can force your politics onto someone with minimal repercussions.
44.The experience changes radically from state to state.
45.You don't have to pay extra for C-SPAN.
46.Rehearsal for politics is socially acceptable.
47.Oral politics is the norm.
48.Politics won't get you pregnant.
49.Politics doesn't make you sleep on the wet spot.
50.Everyone will accept a political payoff.
51.You can politic with your children.
52.Politicing can last for hours.
53.Politicians already know it wasn't any good.
54.You can politic on television, or any other appliance.
55.You can politic in a moving vehicle without crashing.
56.The best politicians are usually out of shape.
57.You can politic as much as you want without developing a reputation.
58.You can politic even when you're exhausted.
59.It's to your advantage if the person you're politicking with has a headache.
60.No one wants to "just be held" by a politician.
61.You don't have to stop at the drugstore before politics.
62.You don't have to dial a "900" number to politic over the phone.
63.You can politic in front of your parents.
64.It's not embarrassing to politic with the lights on.
65.Politicing won't ruin your friendship.
66.It's okay to wise off during politics.
67.Blondes get no preference in politics.
68.It's easy to pick up where you left off in politics.
69.Circulation of political photos is desirable.
70.If you "ejaculate on the floor of the House," you don't have to clean up before your parents get home.
71.Your running mate doesn't constantly ask you to re-evaluate your politics.
72.You don't have to lie about loving politicians.
73.Becoming an ex-politician doesn't cost you half of everything.
74.Political solicitation is encouraged.
75.Lawyers make the best politicians.
76.You can keep your socks on during politics.
77.Repetition is expected in politics.
78.Repetition is expected in politics.
79.Active participation is not required in politics.
80.Political criticism is not taboo.
81.Third parties are rarely successful in politics.
82.Political bluffing is both encouraged and expected.
83.It is not totally uncouth to politic at funerals.
84.No one's concerned about still being respected after politics (they already know they aren't).
85.You can call somebody by the purpose they serve in politics.
86.There's security at political functions.
87.Husbands don't shoot you for politicking with their wives.
88."Just watching" politics is not considered aberrant behavior.
89.You can change orientation and still be successful.
90.No one expects you to live up to your promises in politics.
91.You have a support staff to help you with difficult issues.
92.Successful politicians can screw an entire nation at once.
93.It's easy to blame political failures on someone else.
94. Just because you suck once doesn't mean you have to do it forever.
95.It's okay to refer to notes and texts during politics.
96.Sexual relations can further your politics, while politics usually complicates sexual relations.
97.Issues can be resolved by a ballot initiative.
98.You are entitled to a trial before you can be kicked out for poor performance.
99.You can reap benefits from the process without being an actual participant.
100.It's normal to hire someone to do the more unpleasant aspects of your job.
