Holy moly its been awhile since I've had the time to type my evil thoughts on this page, but I'm back and stronger than ever, well maybe not as strong as I expected. Lots of things have gone through my mind, questions of love, faith, truth, lies, sex and videotape. Well eversince i started CEGEP, all these crazy thoughts entered my head about my future, sure I've thought about all these things plenty of times, but now the time has come for me to be serious. Rearranging my life has been one thing, but the emotional roller coaster that I hide from most people, is starting to climb that steep hill, and I know that it'll be going down any second. For some reason I havent been able to grasp the true meaning of what is my purpose in this fucked up society, another tax paying slut for the institutions, to pump out more brain washed helpless souls. I dont know what to follow, my heart says one thing one minute and then tells me other the next. I make all these decisions but I dont know what motivates me; is it for my own self-actualization, or to conform with the rest of our "lovely normal" bureaucratic cell hogging, cyber trendy society...ah fuck this shit.
THAT was a thought brought to you by ME...more to come next week...maybe something paradoxial
by: Bouncing Souls
Last night was bad my doubts were all I really had realizing I was alone and trying to think of someone to phone but no one came to mind there was nothing for me to say that just anyone would understand I was scared and afraid I was so alone we're neurotic we've had it! surround myself with people but I'm always alone human props small talk keeps silence from imposing my own mind my worst enemy it will destroy me slowly more coffee more coffee more coffee I'm going numb we're neurotic we've had it it's hard for me to explain it's hard to explain it's hard to understand all the fear and phobia that lays inside and traps this man when I'm surrounded I wanna scream and kick down the walls destroy what hold me I wanna smash it all we're neurotic we've had it
eyes are following you in the deep eerie darkness of night