Tear drops rip the frozen boundary of
thoughts collected deep within,
an echoing reminder that
He cannot hear my ponderosity.
He cannot know the terror that
grabs me tightly,
shakes me violently
and scares me awake
while he's sleeping peacefully.
I want him
to hug me
to squeeze me
to want me
to need me
to beg me to never leave him...
As I push him away.
And I'm sorry,
'cause I want him to stay...
He claims he can't read me,
Well,
neither can I,
and sometimes I'm just too damn hard to define,
And I'm sorry,
but I fear him...
or maybe just affection
or maybe just
Reality
in general,
So I freeze...
And I'm sorry,
'cause he's perfect--
which is scary...
or maybe simply terrifying
or maybe extremely
New
to me,
So I freeze...
And the tear drops
rip the frozen boundary of my thoughts...
And I'm sorry
'cause sometimes,
more than anything,
I just want to
grab him and
kiss him and
tell him
I love him and
whisper, "I'm not so scared
Anymore..."
But I freeze.
