SOULS FOR SALE!!! SOULS FOR SALE!!! ROCK BOTTOM PRICES!!!
HI THERE, HYPNOKRISHNA HERE. I'M SURE YOU KNOW BY NOW THAT I HAVE YOUR SOUL ALL FOR MYSELF. I HAVE STOLEN IT FROM YOU WITHOUT YOU EVEN KNOWING. QUITE PAINLESS, WASN'T IT? YES, INDEED. NOW YOU ARE, UNMETAPHORICALLY AND LITERALLY, MINE. I CAN DO WITH YOU AS I PLEASE.
YOU KNOW, IT'S NOT QUITE SO BAD BEING DAMNED. AFTER ALL, YOU CAN GO ABOUT THE REST OF YOUR LIVES, DOING AS YOU PLEASE, NEVER HAVING TO WORRY ABOUT JEAPORDIZING YOUR ETERNAL SPIRIT, OR BREAKING THE STRICT RULES OF SOME OLD WITHERED GOD'S RULES. YOU MAY OBEY ANY LAW THAT YOU WISH, OR DISREGARD THEM AS YOU DESIRE. IN A WAY, I HAVE GIVEN YOU, MY FOLLOWERS, A SORT OF FREEDOM. BUT DON'T THANK ME NOW. THERE'LL BE PLENTY OF TIME FOR THAT IN THE UPCOMING MOMENTS OF CHAOS AND UPHEAVAL WHEN HYPNOKRISHNA ASCENDS TO HIS DESERVED THRONE. AND YOU'LL ALL BE THERE TO GROVEL AT MY FEET, AS THE ENVY OF THE CURS WHO'LL BE UNDOUBTEDLY CAST INTO SLAVERY AND TORTURED FOR MY AMUSEMENT.
NOW, BEGIN THE CHANT: ALL HAIL HYPNOKRISHNA!! ALL HAIL HYPNOKRISHNA!! AVE HYPNOKRISHNA!! 23! 23! 23! SOUND THE CHAPEL BELLS AND ROUSE THE GRAVEYARDS!! THE MASTER IS HERE!! HAIL! HAIL! HAIL!
Click here, my precious little turd, to view the HYPNOKRISHNA corporate sponsor's logo. After all, aren't we all just puppets on strings, dangling like slabs of meat in a chilled freezer? never forget how badly I want to devour you, my children. SING MY PRAISES!!!
ART THOU WORTHY TO VIEW ONE OF THE UNHOLY HYPNOKRISHNA'S MOST GRANDIOSE MASTERPIECES, TRULY A VISION OF HELL'S CHAOS CHURNING THAT CAN PETRIFY A SLAB OF FLESH'S MORALITY IN A STUNNING BLOW? BEHOLD, "THE SUICIDE EMBRACE OF A DEFORMED RACE," HIGH ART, THE HIGHEST SINCE, WELL, NOT TO BLOW MY OWN HORN, BUT THE HIGHEST SINCE THE CREATION OF THE MONA LISA! THERE, I SAID IT! I AM NOT ONLY THE SAVIOR OF THIS RUINED WORLD, I AM ITS ARTISTIC MASTERMIND! ASCEND TO MY THRONE! HYPNOKRISHNA HAIL TO THEE!!! DON'T GET ME STARTED, FOOL, GAZE AT THE FLESH OF MY IMAGINATION!!!! AVE 23!
Take another step along the fiery path to hell that leads to eternal salvation, enter a new domain, more like a past life recollection I'm sure will make you ecstatic. Love and kisses.
>OR ELSE, FOLLOW HYPNOKRISHNA ALONG ANOTHER DEEP CAVERN, BEYOND YOUR FAINTEST IDEA OF REALITY. READY TO BE MESMERIZED WHILST I ABUSE YOU? GET TO STEPPIN'.
