Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer
Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer were a notorious couple of cats
As knockabout clowns, quick change comedians
Tight rope walkers and acrobats
They had an extensive reputation
They made their home in Victoria Grove
That was merely their center of opperations
For they were incurably give to rove!
If the area window was found ajar
And the basement looked like a feild of war
If a tile or two came loose from the roof
Which presently ceased to be waterproof
If the drawers were pulled out from the bedroom chests
And you couldn't find one of your winter vests
Or after supper one of the girls
Suddenly missed her Woolworth pearls
Then the family would say, "It's that horrible cat!"
It was Mungojerrie, or Rumpleteazer
And most of the time they left it at that
Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer had an unusual gift of the gab
They were highly efficient; cat burgalers as well
And remerkably smart at a smash and grab
They made their home in Victoria Grove
They had no regular occupation
They were plausible fellows who liked to engage
A friendly policeman in conversation!
When the family assembled for Sunday dinner
Their minds made up that they won't get thinner
An Argentine joint, potatoes and greens
Then the cook would appear from behind the scenes
And say in a voice that was broken with sorrow
"I'm afraid you must wait and have dinner tomorrow
The joint has gone from the oven like that!"
Then the family would say
"It's that horrible cat!"
It was Mungojerrie or Rumpleteazer
And most of the time they left it at that!
Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer had a wonderful way of working together
And some of the time you would say it was luck!
And some of the time you would say it was weather
They go through the house like a hurricane
And no sober person could take his oath
Was it Mungojerrie or Rumpleteazer?
Or could you have sworn that it might have been both!
And when you hear a dining room smash!
Or up from the pantry there came a loud crash!
Or down from the library came a loud ping!
From a vass which was commonly said to be "Ming"
Then the family would say
"Now which was which cat?"
It was Mungojerrie AND Rumpleteazer
And there's nothin' at all to be done about that!
And there's nothin' at all to be done about that!
