Taylor, Tyler, and I followed our father in the front door. Our mother stood up, a worried look on her face. She walked silently over to my father, gazing into his eyes, trying to ascertain the problem. The rage and pain on his face seemed to soften somewhat in her presence, but it was still very noticeable.
"Todd?" she whispered.
He reached up and ran a finger along her jaw, staring into her eyes. He dropped his hand and turned to us.
"Sit down," he said quietly. I sat in a chair, both Tyler and Taylor sat on the floor. None of us met our mother's concerned eyes.
Mom looked confused. "Okay...what's going on? Is it something about the case?" she asks worriedly.
Dad shook his head. Without looking at her, he sank slowly down into the couch.
Frustrated, Mom turned to us. "What? Will someone please tell me what's going on?"
Tyler looked up at our mother, his eyes shiny with tears. "Brady Buchanan says Dad's a rapist...and Dad says it's true," he says quietly.
Suddenly, a look of understanding passes over Mom's face. She sits down on the couch next to our father. She reaches up slowly, and strokes his hair.
"Oh Querido," she whispers.
Tyler looks confused. "Wait...you knew?" he asks, suddenly seeming bitter.
Mom seems somewhat taken aback by his tone. "Of course I did Tyler," she answers quietly. I look at my father, who just sits there, staring straight ahead. Not defeated though....strong. Almost like he needed this.
Taylor looks up at our parents, her face streaked with tears. "Dad...how could you hurt someone like that?" she asks sadly.
Our Dad fixes his eyes on her, suddenly shiny with tears. "Because I was a jerk....I was messed up. I had a choice...I got angry...and I raped those women. No excuses," he says quietly, reaching down and grasping our mother's hand.
"Women!" Tyler yells, getting angry. "Brady only said Marty Saybrooke....there were more?"
Dad looks at Tyler, and simply nods. I sat and watched this all unfold around me...not exactly sure what to do...what to say. Tyler's anger didn't surprise me...he idolized our father....this was gonna be hard for him.
"I can't believe this!" Tyler yells. "And you," he says, turning to our mother, "you knew and you still married him!"
Tyler's words and tone snap Dad out of his reverie. "Don't you talk to your mother like that! Be mad at me....not her!"
"Todd it's okay," my mother says, trying to calm him, tears slipping down her cheeks. Tyler stands frozen, glaring at our father, but sinks back down to the floor.
Taylor, huddled on the floor, raises her head. "You knew...mom? And you married him?" she whispers. My father turns to Taylor, seeing the heartbreak on her face. With a sigh, he turns to our mom.
"Answer them Delgado," he says softly.
My Mom turns and meets his eyes. She bites her lip and begins to speak.
"I knew about what your father had done...pretty soon after I met him. But....the rapes...they happened a long time before I met your father. And the man that I knew...the man that I became friends with...the man I fell in love with...I didn't see him as a "rapist"...even though I knew what he had done. I saw a succesful, determined businessman...but above all else...I saw a loving father. I was completely amazed at how incredible he was with Starr. And so although I knew....I just...knew in my gut that he wasn't capable of that anymore. Your father and I are so much alike....we were both outsiders...both had problematic childhoods to say the least...but when we were together...it didn't seem to matter what anyone else thought. So...you see...even though I knew....and I accepted that it happened...I also knew he had paid for his crime...and had gotten help...and was trying desperately to make peace with himself...for his child...and future children," she pauses, "I love your father...and nothing or no one is gonna make me feel bad or guilty for that...and believe me people have tried," she finishes strongly, grasping my father's hand. I saw my father gazing at her, obviously affected by her words. Tyler and Taylor both stared at the floor.
Then, my father slowly turned his head to look at me.
"Ask her, TD."
I stared at him, somewhat confused.
"Ask her what you asked me in my office."
Comprehension dawned, and I focused my eyes on my mother.
I swallowed hard. "Mom....did....did Dad ever....rape you?"
Her mouth dropped open and tears flowed freely down her cheeks. I could see a flash of anger in her eyes at the question...but also understanding that we had to ask it.
"No, TD....never...and I know he never would," she answered with conviction.
"But.." I paused...not really sure if I should bring this up, "but...he hit you."
My mother suddenly whirled to face my father. "You told them?"
"I told TD...Tyler and Taylor just found out today."
My mother shook her head, obviously angry. Sensing this, my father reached out his free hand to stroke her hair.
"I'm sorry Téa....I should have waited for you....this is about both of us."
"I can't believe this," Taylor said softly, staring up at our parents.
"TD...what did your father tell you?"
I looked back and forth between them. "Umm...just that he hit you."
Tyler looked at them. "So...you're a rapist and you hit our mother...this is great!" he says sarcastically.
"Tyler! Stop it!"
"It's okay Téa," my father said quietly. Almost like he wanted the punishment.
"TD...that's all he told you?"
I nodded. My mother turned to my father, a gentle smile on her face.
"Always trying to protect me, huh Manning?" Then she turned to us. "Your father didn't tell you the whole story."
"Téa, you don't have to..."
"No, Todd....you were not the only one wrong that day. Your father did hit me," she began, "but I said some awful things to him. That's not an excuse..it was still wrong. But I said things I never should have said. I also," she pauses, "I also hit him...in the head...with a shovel," she finishes quietly.
Tyler, Taylor, and I looked on in shock.
"I could have killed him," she says sadly, "but there were things going on then that you guys know nothing about. It was ....a bad situation. We were both strung out...exhausted....and to say it was the low point of our relationship is a staggering understatement. But...we worked through it...we got help...and NOTHING like that has happened since."
Suddenly Tyler stood up. "I can't take this," he says, and storms upstairs.
"Tyler!"
"Let him go, Delgado...he needs time."
Taylor stares at our parents. She looks like she is trying to think of something to say...but simply walks upstairs. I look at my parents...they both look shellshocked.
"I gotta get outta here too," I said quickly...heading for the door. I needed to think....it was like it was all pressing down on me. I needed...to see Amy. I stopped on the porch, and glanced back through the open window. They were still sitting on the couch, grasping hands.
"Todd...it's gonna be okay....remember how upset Starr was? She..she just needed time....and you got through it with her...we'll all get through this," my mom says softly, stroking his face. My father turns to her, and tears started to fall silently down his cheeks. He leans his head into my mother's hair, and she holds him close. I turn and head down the steps, confused more than ever. Hopefully...talking to Amy would help...
To be continued....