One Week Later,
Todd's apartment
It had been a rough week. Conflicting emotions swirled about Todd, but really that was the norm for his life. Anger at Sam for setting him up, relief that Téa would be in town, panic that Téa would be in town. Gratitude that Sam had set him up.
A virtual tornado. Constantly spinning, gaining momentum as each day passed.
And Viki had been on his case. Talk to Téa, talk to Téa. Well he had talked to Téa...about Starr. Nothing else. As far as he was concerned, she was the one who gave up. To Hell with all of it, he wasn't gonna put what little heart he possessed through the ringer again.
He poured himself a glass of scotch and flopped down on the sofa. His normally dark apartment was even darker, what with the rain pouring down outside. Suited him just fine. Lightness..it reminded him of her. Just like at the penthouse. It had been so dark...before her. Then, she had re-decorated...bringing much needed light into his dark world. The thing was, it wasn't just the paint...or the furniture. It was her. Her smile, her eyes. Even those deep, dark brown eyes brought light into his world. Just like his shining Starr, Téa had been a beacon in the black hole he called his life. Now, he was resigned to his black hole, his only pinpoints of light coming when he was in Starr's presence.
Which is where Téa was coming in, again. Interesting how Starr was always the one who brought them together, even if she didn't know it. Okay, so it was Sam too, but if Todd hadn't decided to go for custody again, then he wouldn't have needed a lawyer, right?
A knock on the door pulls him from his thoughts. He sets down his drink and goes to open it, and is immediately met by her beautiful smile.
"Hi!" Téa says brightly, trying to hide her own pain and anxiety.
Todd swallows hard, fixing her with his patented glare. "What the hell are you doing here?" he grumbles.
Téa rolls her eyes and walks in. "I have something for you to look over."
"Ever hear of calling first?"
She laughs. "Todd Manning bringing up social niceties? My God, you really ARE mad at me aren't you?" she quips, realizing in that instant just how many of his traits she had taken on. Using sarcasm as a defense against fear, pain...emotions, that was Todd's trademark.
He stalks past her, picking up his glass and taking a drink. "How'd you find out where I live?"
"It's not exactly a mystery Todd."
"Whatever," he says gruffly, "What do you want?"
Téa sets down her briefcase and opens it, taking out a set of legal documents. "Here, I want you to look this over. I have a meeting with Blair's lawyers tomorrow, and I want to make sure you're okay with our initial offer. By the way, I hear Blair has been ripping you a new one over your gall to go for custody again."
"Yeah basically. Not that I care."
"You never did," she grins. Todd takes the papers from her and looks them over. While he does, Téa looks around the apartment. So dark. She wraps her arms around herself, feeling a tremendous sense of guilt...and again...failure. He had wanted her to pull him out of the dark, and she had given up. Not without good reason of course, but Téa Delgado was not a quitter. A tiny part of her had hoped that losing her would inspire Todd to take a long, hard look at himself, but from she had seen, it had sent him spinning in the opposite direction. Just like herself. She had thought by leaving him she could start over, find a new relationship with someone who could meet her needs. Or what she thought were her needs. Jesus, all she had wanted was five million dollars. When the hell did it get so complicated?
"You really think she's gonna go for this?" Todd's surprised voice pulls her from her thoughts.
"No, I don't."
"Okay, as usual, I'm confused."
"Todd, it's better to ask for more and have to negotiate than to ask for the minimum and have her accept, and end up not getting anywhere close to what you really want."
Todd looks at her skeptically, then shrugs. "Yeah, well you're the lawyer."
"Exactly. Have I ever steered you wrong?"
He looks at her for a long moment. "Not legally, no," he says, a note of bitterness in his voice.
"What does THAT mean?"
"You know exactly what it means Delgado."
"Sorry, I left my Todd Manning Translator at home," she says dryly.
"Not surprised, you're always leaving things...or people."
Téa shakes her head. "Oh, you're one to talk."
"Oh no, don't you make this about me Téa, you walked out, not me."
"Well you sure didn't waste any time picking up and leaving yourself!"
"Alright, it's my turn to ask, what the hell does that mean?"
Téa shakes her head. "You know what? I'm not doing this," she mutters, grabbing her briefcase and turning towards the door.
"Oh yeah, that's it. Just walk out Téa. Things don't go exactly the way you want, just leave. You're good at it."
Téa stops, her shoulders slumping slightly. She slowly sets down her briefcase and turns around.
"I came back," she says quietly.
"Yeah, because of the wedding, and because Sam offered you a sweet job."
"No, I mean...before. When I left."
"Huh?"
Téa walks over and sits down on the sofa. "I was so frustrated with you, so fed up, that I just packed up and left."
"Yeah thanks, you know I really don't need the history lesson," Todd interrupts bitterly.
"Will you shut up for two seconds and let me talk?" she snaps. Todd look momentarily surprised. He shrugs and gestures toward her. "I didn't actually go that far, just to a hotel a couple of blocks away. I got a room and just sat there for a few hours. Crying, confused, trying to figure out what to do. And suddenly, this realization hit me. I didn't want to leave you. I realized that I had made a really big mistake. So, I grabbed my stuff and ran back to the hotel we had been staying in," she says, tears sliding down her cheeks. "But when I got back there, you were already gone."
Téa studies her hands intently as an unbearable silence fills the room. Had she looked up, she would have seen a complete look of shock on Todd's face. He was still trying to comprehend what she had said. He had ingrained it in his mind that she had left without a second thought to him, without looking back. And if she was to be believed, she was starting to crack the story he had made up in his head. The story he had to keep holding on to to keep her out, to stay angry out of her. To keep his wall from crumbling.
"Then...why didn't you come back here?" he asks, pain evident in his voice.
Téa looks up. "I don't know. I guess, when I found you gone, I took it as some sort of weird sign. If we were both willing to just give up so easily, maybe someone was trying to tell us something. I thought maybe I should just start over, you know? So, that's what I did. Didn't work though," she finishes quietly.
Todd shakes his head and stands up, refusing to give her any leeway. "Yeah, but you still left. You said you wouldn't leave me and you did."
"Yeah, well you said you would try not to push me away, and you didn't hold up your end of the deal Todd! I thought you were closed off before you left, but it's nothing compared to what I saw over the three months we were back together."
"Oh, no! Don't you pin this on me Delgado, no way! You gave up on me!"
"You are the one who gave up Todd. I was the one who left, but you are the one who gave up. When you decided NOT to try, you gave up on me, on us, and on yourself," she says sadly. Wiping her cheeks, she picks up the briefcase and heads towards the door. As she reaches the door, she turns towards him. "You live in so much pain Todd, but if you aren't willing to try and let go of some of it, then you are going to live the rest of your life alone, and I don't think that's what you really want."
Her words ring in his ears as he watches her walk out the door. He exhales loudly, blinking back tears. Feeling the swirling tornado kick up again inside him.
She came back...
No..no it's her fault...she left..she's the one who gave up...
She came back...
Blame her, be angry with her...don't let her in...she gave up...
She came back...
To Be Continued...
