Okay, I’ve given up on the synopses except for small reminders – the previous evening Ranma had a real breakdown, crying on Ryoga and saying she missed him. Ranma, Ryoga and the Tendos decided to visit a fair the afternoon before that.
TEN: 1998
Vulnerability
It was sunny. It was slightly cold. It was Saturday.
This meant a handful of things. It meant that, for Nabiki and Ranma and Akane, school was in session – but only for half the day. It meant that the fair would probably be packed, which had the additional implication that Ranma, Ryoga, and the Tendo sisters would encounter someone they knew.
It meant, in this particular instance, that Ryoga had woken early. He was outside in the slightly misty morning, doing kata and attempting to calm himself, something he didn’t normally do. Usually he used his anger when he fought. As his kata became more and more precise the more closely he focused on thinking nothing and breathing properly, he began to realize that it was how Ranma swept the floor with him in their battles: the pigtailed boy would get him angry, and then proceed to take advantage of Ryoga’s resulting sloppiness.
Was this just an extention? A new and more devious way to keep him off-balance?
Nah. Ranma wasn’t that canny. That’s all there was to it.
Which would mean that he really had been in that much pain. Which didn’t quite fit in with Ryoga’s normal ideas concerning the workings of the universe. Briefly, he played out their encounter in his mind:
Ranma grips my sleeve, hard. Won’t let go, even though I move slightly away.
Ryoga shifted position, bending both knees so that his body was low to the ground, fist extended.
Then, she pulls herself closer using that grip. She puts both arms around me and pulls. A hug. Her eyes close; her hands move to press against my chest.
Ryoga slid his feet together, bringing his hands down in a ready position; then, he repeated his original move in a slightly different direction.
Her hand begins to grip my shirt, hard, again. She starts hitting me and telling me she hates me.
But she doesn’t hit hard.
Ryoga executed a pair of high blocks, followed by an open-hand strike.
Then she starts trembling all over and... screams.
That scream was like breaking glass and fingernails on a chalkboard and like... like... He’d never made that sound, before. He didn’t know anybody who had ever made that sound. It was the sound of someone who’s lost something far more important than their way.
Ryoga realized he had stopped moving, and began the kata again from the beginning.
Then she does that calming breathing.
Ryoga slid to the first position again, attempting to think without attaching feeling.
Then she says she misses me.
Which didn’t make sense in the slightest. Shift to the second position; put your back into it, that punch was weak!
Then she says she’s sorry, gets up and...
And nothing. And turned some kind of switch in her soul. Something that allowed her to wash dishes when she’d rather just go ahead and jump off a convenient cliff or slit her wrists.
Yeah. That makes sense. Great, glad it’s all sorted out.
When he opened his eyes, Ranma was standing in the doorway. “Whoa. Awful. What’s up with you?”
“That’s my line,” Ryoga murmured. “What was the matter last night? You can’t just go and do that to me and not say a word. And, you ‘miss me’. What’s that supposed to mean?”
Ranma grinned sunnily – his new grin, the one that all too obviously concealed something. “What – dreaming about me, now?”
“Dreaming?”
Ranma nodded. “Yeah, P-chan. What exactly went on, huh? I’d love to hear about it.”
Ryoga paled. “Uh... n-no, that’s okay.”
Akane grabbed hold of Ranma’s schoolbag and began to drag him out of the dojo. “C’mon, baka, we’re going to be late. And stop teasing Ryoga!”
Ryoga slid into a seated position in the middle of the floor, his mouth slightly open, as the pair made their departure.
A dream. A dream! Well, that explains it.
As a dream, what could it mean? That he saw Ranma as hiding something? in pain? And what could ‘I miss you’ mean? It was pretty cryptic; even for a dream, it didn’t make much sense.
Thank goodness he hadn’t said something really stupid, like, “what had you crying last night?”, or flippant, like, “next time you want a hug, go to one of your many girlfriends.” That would’ve been more than his life was worth.
Akane snuck a peek at him from the corner of her eye. “That haircut suits you,” she finally said.
Ranma gave her a small smile. “Thanks. Kasumi evened it out. It’s real short for my girl form, though; hope I don’t look too weird.”
Akane shrugged nonchalantly. Picturing the cut on Ranma’s girl form, she would think that it’d actually look really nice.
Her curiosity was satisfied as the perennial old woman with washwater splashed the cursed martial artist. “Mou, it’s too cold for that,” Ranma breathed.
Akane snorted. She was right. The cut, even shorter and more ‘boyish’ than her own, simply made Ranma look like even more of a knockout by revealing her wide eyes and slender neck. “Here,” Akane said, taking off her dress’s jacket and handing it to the shivering redhead.
“But, Akane...”
“I’m not wet, am I?”
Ranma gratefully took the jacket and threw it around her shoulders. “Well, that’s a little bit better.”
“Ah! The sun rises twice in one morning, astounding the universe! The pigtailed goddess and Akane Tendo are twin stars in the heavens!”
Ranma broke into Tatewaki Kuno’s introductory sphiel. “Ah, Kuno-sempai? I’m afraid you have it wrong. I’m not your ‘pigtailed goddess’. I’m Ranma. Ranma Saotome.”
Kuno frowned. “Yes, but isn’t that her name as well?”
“Indeed. I’m her oldest sister, Ranma.”
“You’re telling me that there are five of you, now?” Kuno’s frown had deepened.
“Oh, no, of course not!” Ranma announced.
“Not again,” Akane murmured, putting her hand to her forehead.
“There are six!” Ranma announced, one finger in the air as if to make a point.
Kuno facefaulted, then dragged himself slowly upright. “Allow me to make a prediction. This sixth sibling is a boy, yet has hair just like yours...”
Ranma nodded. “Why, how did you know?”
“...and his name is... let me guess... also Ranma.”
Ranma nodded again, more eagerly this time. “You’re catching on!”
“So exactly how many siblings do you have?”
“I told you: five.”
Kuno was now leaning on his bokken, as though he was so weary of this game that he needed its support. “Yes, but the lovely and somewhat fictiously bubbly Ranma-chan informed me that she was one of four. Now you tell me you are one of six.”
Ranma tilted her head to one side, obviously deeply in thought. “Well, Ranma-chan, as you call her, has always had a bit of a poor memory. It’s entirely possible that she’s forgotten the two of us. She was just a little kid when we moved away, after all. But now me and Ranma have come back to help our little bro and sisters defeat Ranma!”
“Well... if thou needst aid in your struggle, I would be more than willing to oblige,” he replied hesitantly. “Meet me after school, then, if thou wouldst require it.”
Ranma nodded solemnly. “Will do. After all, I’ve always thought of you as a little brother, kind of.”
“A what!” Kuno demanded. “You don’t know me!”
“Certainly not. But from what I’ve heard from Ranma-chan and your pigtailed goddess, you’re a paragon of virtue, if a bit misguided. So, if you need my help, I’ll be there for you, too. Especially with that whole getting a girl thing. I’m told you need some help in that arena.”
Ranma strode away with Akane in tow, while Kuno sputtered incoherently.
“Ranma, that was mean,” Akane whispered.
“Mean? You do realize that you’re talking about the guy who eggs on the hentai horde every morning?”
Akane considered this. “On second thought, screw with the bastard until he doesn’t know up from down.”
“Will do,” Ranma replied, cracking her knuckles.
It took nearly halfway through her lesson before Hinako Hinomiya realized that the unthinkable had happened.
Ranma was actually paying attention.
Not in a psuedo-interested way, or an apple-polishing way, but in the way that a moderately studious pupil might: with a mild look of interest in her eye and a pen in her hand.
It was almost enough to give the age-shifting sensei hives. She was even more shocked when she asked a question, and Ranma answered her. Not just answered her, but answered her correctly, and with more than a little arrogant ease, as though the entire business were slightly beneath him.
And yesterday he’d been such a delinquent! And after that stupid attack, she’d been unable to transform for the rest of the day...
Akane Tendo seemed preoccupied, but she often did, these days. Ukyo didn’t appear to have any idea that something was wrong. Similarly, Hiroshi and Daisuke, and Sayuri and Yuka, appeared to be having a pretty normal day. They were their usual selves.
Which meant that some new kind of hell had visited Akane or Ranma or both, but nobody really knew about it save the pair of them.
Interesting.
During break, she watched Ranma approach her with mild nervousness. He might try the pressure points again; he might be attempting to destroy her chi-sucking abilities for all time. She readied a coin, just in case.1
“Sensei,” Ranma began hesitantly, running her fingers through her short hair, “I have a question for you. It’s a personal one. Do you mind?”
Hinako blinked, pocketing the coin with a flourish and a flash. “Personal? Well, we’ll see just how personal, before I answer.”
Ranma smiled apologetically. “When you look like a little girl, do you feel like one, too?”
Hinako’s eyes widened. She understandably leapt to quite the wrong conclusion. “Problems with the curse, Ranma?”
Ranma colored, glancing down at her still-female body. “Oh! Uh, no... just wondering how you deal with it... changing your age.”
The English teacher paused, considering her response. Not that she believed Ranma’s lame excuse in the slightest. She began to speak in slow but solemn English. If you can understand me, then you can get your answer, she replied. I feel different in my little girl form. Definitely different. But mostly it’s in the way that people treat me. I think.
Ranma nodded slowly. Uhm... same here, I guess. But I really was asking about the age thing. Do you ever find yourself thinking like a little girl thinks, when you’re in your adult form?
Hinako paused. Not only had Ranma responsed – in relatively passable English – she thought she might have found out what her students were so disturbed over. “S-sometimes,” she murmured. “I suppose. But that’s mostly for show... it’s just easier to behave as others expect you to, sometimes.”
Ranma pondered that for a moment quietly, then nodded. “I see.” She shrugged and made her way back to her seat.
“Hey, Ranchan. What’s up?”
Ranma smiled at Ukyo. “Hiya, Ucchan. Not that much. You?”
“Going to the fair, tonight?”
“Yes,” Akane cut in. “With me.”
“And Ryoga,” Ranma added.
“Ohh. That jerk. He’s willing to be the third wheel, huh?”
Akane blinked at Ukyo. “Huh?”
“Well, you’d think he’d invite me! I’d do the same for him, you know,” Ukyo growled.
“Do you wanna come?” Ranma inquired, seeing the only polite way to ease Ukyo’s suffering.
Ukyo perked up immediately. “Sure! It’ll be great.”
Akane nodded, a little reluctantly. “Yeah. Fun city.”
“Two guys, two girls,” Ukyo murmured. “Sounds almost like a double-date!” She elbowed Akane. “Planning on finally making a move with Ryoga, Akane?”
Akane buried her face in her arms and murmured something incomprehensible. She’d long since given up on keeping Ukyo from thinking that she and Ryoga would make the perfect couple.
“Five girls, one guy,” Ranma countered absently.
“Huh?”
Ranma straightened. “What? Oh. I mean, Kasumi and Nabiki are coming; and I’m going to the fair as a girl.”
“What?” Ukyo demanded. “Why?”
“Because I can eat a lot, score free treats and play fun games,” Ranma replied colorlessly. “Why else?”
Akane shrugged. “Weren’t you at the last fair? Ranma always goes as a girl.”
“Hmm.” Ukyo shrugged, too. “All right. We’ll be the prettiest three girls there, right, Ranchan?”
Ranma colored slightly and elbowed Ukyo. “Don’t embarrass me!”
Ukyo blinked, not having received the reaction she’d expected. The redhead’s behavior was a lot like her own when Ranma had first called her ‘cute’, if a bit less emphatic. She decided to test the waters further. “What are you going to wear?”
Ranma tilted her head to one side. “Dunno. Have to see what I’ve got. Maybe pale blue or dark green; I like them the best.”
Ukyo perched atop the desk next to Ranma’s. “Jewelry?”
“I don’t like jewelry all that much,” Ranma replied absently. “I always lose it. You know that. Remember when that... bracelet...?” The redhead’s bright blue gaze shifted from the blackboard to Ukyo’s confused features. “Whoops.”
“Whoops?” Ukyo inquired.
“I sort of forgot who I was talking to for a second,” Ranma replied.
“You forgot! What’s that supposed to mean?” The okonomiyaki chef was justifiably miffed. “And you always lose it? Just how often have you been wandering around as a girl, lately, anyway?”
Akane shook her head at Ukyo from behind Ranma’s back, an obvious request to hold out for later information.
Ranma, however, caught the motion. “What, we’ve got secrets now?”
Akane fumed. “No, you’ve got secrets. Me and Ukyo are just having a friendly chat.” She grabbed the okonomiyaki chef by the arm and stormed out of the classroom.
Ranma took in a deep breath, let it out slowly. She leaned back in her chair and crossed her ankles up on the desk. “Boy, it really is the bad old good old days...”
“Hey, Ranma!”
Ranma blinked as Hiroshi and Daisuke poked their heads into view, causing her to bring her chair forward in surprise, bonking heads with Daisuke.
“Owww...”
“What’s up with the girly getup today, man?” Hiroshi inquired once his two friends had stopped rubbing their foreheads and moaning.
“Got splashed,” Ranma replied shortly.
“And?”
“And nothin’. Got splashed; end of story.”
“Does this mean you’re dateable?” Daisuke inquired.
Ranma casually kicked him in the face.
“Well, he had that coming,” Hiroshi admitted. “Still, I gotta admit that it’s weird for you to spend all day as a girl unless you’ve got some kinda reason.”
Ranma blinked. “Well, I am planning on making a spectacle of Kuno. And I need this form to do it.”
“Spectacle?” Daisuke wondered, dragging himself up off the ground with very little trouble.2 “Of Kuno.”
“That ain’t no stretch,” Hiroshi chuckled. “He’s a spectacle of himself!”
Ranma chuckled. “Nah, this is gonna be in the above and beyond category.”
“Whoa, you gotta let us in on it,” Daisuke urged. “C’mon, man, he’s such an ass. I’d love to get back at him for the way he treats us all.”
Ranma shook her head. “This is my own, personal revenge. Get your own.”
“Aw, you’re no fun,” Daisuke grumbled.
“And speakin’ of fun,” Hiroshi broke in, “bet you’re going to that fair with Akane, huh?”
“Tell me you guys haven’t done it yet,” Daisuke crowed.
Ranma flushed. “No, we ain’t done it. But I’m going to the fair with her. And Ryoga, and Ukyo and Nabiki and Kasumi...”
“And us!” Hiroshi broke in. “C’mon, you gotta change that girl to guy ratio. That’s you and Ryoga with four girls!”
“Correction,” Ranma sighed, “it’s Ryoga and five girls. I always go to fairs as a chick. Free food, get to play all those games...”
Daisuke sighed. “Sometimes you’re really lucky, ya know that?”
Ranma blinked at him in surprise.
“Lucky!” Hiroshi broke in. “C’mon, to change into a girl all the time?”
“Mmm, that body,” Daisuke enthused. “Be able to pick up chicks pretty good with it I bet.”
Hiroshi hit his friend before Ranma got the chance. “What are you on!”
Ranma began to laugh, and then guffaw. Tears streamed from her eyes.
“What’s wrong with him?” Daisuke demanded, jerking his thumb towards the hysterical martial artist.
“Beats me.”
Somehow word got around. It always does, at Furinkan.
Thus, at high noon, when Saturday school ended, there was a massive gathering in the courtyard to see the supposed true humiliation of Tatewaki Kuno. No one really wanted to miss it; not to mention the fact that Nabiki was selling good things to eat and drink, like hot cocoa, popcorn, and pocky to dip. Ukyo had industriously set up her grill, as well, and at least as many people were there for the food as the company.
Ranma, who’d forgotten how high school could be with rumormongering – especially where Nabiki was involved – was more than a little surprised to see the huge crowd.
They were more than a little surprised to see Ranma, considering that she was in a long, white, medieval-looking dress, and suddenly had a lot more hair.
“Pigtailed girl! How I have longed to see thee!” Kuno exclaimed at her appearance. “It... is you, isn’t it?”
Ranma nodded enthusiastically. “The one and only, Kuno-sempai!”
“Praise be. Only thou can put to rest these... er, restless stirrings in my soul! Is it true indeed that thou hast...” He began counting on his fingers. “That thou hast five siblings?”
Ranma nodded. “Of course!”
“All named Ranma?”
“Yes. My parents were weirdos.”
“No crap,” Akane murmured, buying hot peanuts from her sister.
“I... see,” Kuno replied. “Your eldest sister told me to meet her here so that we could discuss the overthrow of the evil sorceror.”
“Oh, no, you’re mistaken, Kuno-sempai!” Ranma gushed. “You’re here to help us fight him! Only you are the true warrior who can overcome his evil! It’s been foretold!”
“Foretold! Ah, surely the heavens carry a message of victory to your ears!”
“Oh?” Ranma shook her head. “No, Kuno-sempai. You lose. That’s why this is so hard for me.” She examined the ground, affecting a tear.
“What! It cannot be!” Kuno was thunderstruck... as shown by the roll of thunder which preceded his dramatic lightning.
Ranma threw her arms around him and wept. “Oh, Kuno-sempai!” she wailed.
“Oh, pigtailed goddess!” he exclaimed, holding her tightly.
“Exactly whose humiliation were we supposed to be witnessing here?” Hiroshi wondered.
Ranma drew away from Kuno’s embrace. “But to prove your love for me... you’ll fight anyway, won’t you?”
Kuno blinked down at her. “B-but of course! Though I be doomed to die, I would fight for the freedom of your soul and that of your brothers and sisters!”
“Oh, K–” Ranma began.
“Though I shall burn in the evil fires of his sorcerous flames, I shall protect you, my goddess from heaven!”
“Whoa,” Akane breathed.
“It’s like he’s drunk on his own testosterone!” Nabiki commented, a half-eaten stick of pocky hanging out of her mouth.
“Wow, K –” Ranma began again.
“Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear–”
“That’s enough, Kuno-sempai!” Ranma snapped. “I mean... uh, thank you so much! You’re my hero! My savior!” She affected a calculating demeanor for a moment. “If you weaken him enough, me and Ranma and Ranma and Ranma and Ranma might be able to finish him off!”
Kuno’s head raised; his back straightened. This was obviously one of the proudest moments of his life.
“There are some tokens I can give you that might help you hold your own against his sorcerous wiles,” Ranma continued.
“Ah, a token from my love!” Kuno exclaimed, obviously, as Nabiki had intimated, drunk on... something. Perhaps the fact that the pigtailed goddess was asking directly for his aid for the very first time.
Ranma cheerfully gave him a dead fish. Halibut, to be precise.
Kuno blinked down at it. “Huh?”
“Don’t be deceived by appearances, Tatewaki-chan,” Ranma intoned. “This is a magic fish. With it you will go on an important quest.”
“A quest!”
“Just like a little puppy dog ‘bout to be taken for a walk,” Ukyo observed, watching a small trail of drool hang off of Kuno’s lips.
“Indeed.” Ranma produced a scroll from the same place from which she’d procured the smelly fish: nowhere. “My sisters and myself compiled this list. Follow its instructions, and perhaps you will have enough magic to defeat even the evil sorceror! But return to your domicile by tomorrow’s dawn, or the enchantment will dissolve. And you must complete your quest alone; no one may aid you.”
Kuno accepted the fish and the scroll humbly. “I shall do my damndest for you, my lady!”
Tears sprung to Ranma’s eyes. She clasped her hands in front of her. “Save me, and I will deliver you a kiss!”
Kuno twitched. “Truly!”
“Truly!” She kissed her hand and blew the smooch his way. Then, she moved back through the crowd, passing Nabiki’s snack booth. “Like shootin’ fish in a barrel,” she said to the middle Tendo daughter with a roll of her eyes. “Give me some pocky and a hot tea, okay, Nabiki? Messing with idiots makes me hungry.”
Nabiki obliged, barely noting that Ranma wasn’t giving her any money in return.3
Akane, who was beginning to realize what the note must be about, felt like grabbing the redhead and shaking her. By the time she began to grasp the whole of it, Ranma had disappeared back into the school.
The youngest Tendo realized that Ranma was wearing the same dress she’d worn in Romeo and Juliet.
“Nasty,” Akane whispered. “That was... nasty...”
Nabiki came to her senses just in time to take the next batch of money from a hungry crowd. “Keep in mind who Ranma’s tricking, Akane.”
Akane shook her head. “Even he doesn’t deserve this – if it’s half as bad as I think it is.”
“Aw, c’mon, Akane. What could possibly be on that list that’s worse than what he deserves?”
Tatewaki Kuno examined the list in his hands. It was long, written in a careful but rather masculine hand. Obviously, Ranma or Ranma had written it.
The fish certainly was smelly. Of course, since it was obviously none too fresh, this was to be expected. Kuno eagerly unfurled the scroll.
Brave and strong warrior, it began. In order to defeat the evil Sorceror Saotome, you must have:
1) Dead, smelly fish (provided)
2) No clue
Kuno frowned. How was he not supposed to have a ‘no clue’?
3) The proper garb. In order to perform this sacred quest, you must be wearing the proper garments. Go to Hokawa Street in Nerima prefecture and enter the establishment called ‘Knight Mares’. Tell the salesclerk there your name, and then the following: “I am ready to accept the clothing of a true warrior.” Place upon your body that which he gives to you.
Kuno nodded to himself. He had heard many times before that only certain garments might be worn during an imporant quest or ritual. Sometimes the clothing had to be new; other times, a certain color or even a certain cut. It was obvious that the pigtailed maiden and the other Ranmas had thought this over carefully; he approved.
In the sparkle of early afternoon, he quietly wandered to Hokawa Street. It seemed as though all of his life was coming together. The pigtailed goddess had, obviously with the aid of her sisters and brothers, broken free at least partially from her eldest brother’s spell – enough to finally and sweetly implore his aid. All that was missing from the picture was a squire and a white steed.
So it was that he moved through the street on cloud nine, thunder booming and lightning striking occasionally behind him.
Finally he reached the store in question, seeing that it was filled with medieval style garb. “Ah! Surely this must be the place,” he intoned, and entered.
What met his eye was something far more lovely than even he could have imagined. Armour, swords, gauntlets, and boots were side by side with romantic underskirts, lace-up ladies’ slippers, gowns and dresses. After the stars faded from his eyes, Kuno went up to face the clerk. For a moment, he stared. “Don’t I know you?”
Daisuke, who was a gamer on weekends and an occasional cosplayer, stood behind the counter. “I don’t think so,” he said, feigning confusion. “Do you shop here a lot?” He eyed Kuno’s hakama. “Sure looks like you cosplay.”
“No, foul knave! Ahem...” Kuno looked at his scroll. “I am ready to accept the clothing of a true warrior.”
“Oh!” Daisuke leaned conspiratorally across the counter. “I see. Well, don’t let the foul sorceror Saotome know that I gave you these. They’re very... special. All right?”
Kuno nodded empatically, and accepted a bundle of clothing.
“And this, and this,” Daisuke added, piling small boxes atop the stack. “All right. Cash, or charge?”
Kuno dug through his pockets and finally produced his wallet. Sighing, he parted with the last of the bills. Nabiki had really scraped him clean this week.
“Have fun!” Daisuke advised.
“Is there a changing room in this establishment?”
“’Round back,” Daisuke told him blandly.
The manager came out from his office. “This little joke won’t damage the boy permanently, will it?” he wondered in a soft voice.
“Ranma knows what he’s doing. Hey, thanks, man. Really appreciate it.”
“Just get that mail linked up by next Saturday!”
Dai nodded and exited the shop with a friendly wave at the proprietor. “Will do!”
The older man didn’t bat an eye when Kuno exited the changing room. After all, he was the owner of a cosplaying shop and had seen such things before.
Kuno, however, was slightly more nonplussed. The garters itched, for one thing. Then there was all the lace. The hat would’ve been enough of a hassle without the wig. And the boots were just about impossible to walk in even if they didn’t get in the way of the skirt.
Of course, there was the whole dressed as a girl thing, too.
The manager eyed Kuno professionally. “Not your color,” he said, “but it is a good cut for you.”
“Ranma,” Akane broke in hesitantly.
The redhead turned to Akane. “Yeah, hon? What’s up?”
Akane flushed. “Uh... about Kuno...”
“You aren’t still going on about that, are you? He’ll be fine. He’s a big boy. You’ve got to stop worrying about us guys, Akane. I know it’s your way of saying you care, but it’s better to be there for somebody than to force them to rely on you.”
“You were cruel,” Akane said blandly.
“Huh?”
“Cruel. Malicious. I don’t care what Kuno’s done to us – that doesn’t mean that we should hurt him back that bad. I’m upset with him because I think what he did wasn’t right! Why should we imitate him?”
After a moment’s consideration, a small smile broke out on Ranma’s face. “Yeah, Akane, you’re probably right.”
“Now I think – wait. What?”
“You’re right,” she repeated. Her face fell. “Maybe I went too far.” She paused, deep in thought. “That or not far enough.”
“What?”
Ranma’s smile widened, but it was her unfeeling smile. “Don’t you think there’s method to my madness? I’m trying to get him to leave me alone! And, secondarily, you...”
“By telling him you need his help! You’re not only playing on his delusions, Ranma, you’re feeding them. And making him look like a first-class ass in the process.”
“He does that on his own.” Ranma’s smile disappeared. “Besides, we’re not having this argument again.”
Akane frowned. “I think I liked it better when you called me tomboy or built like a brick. At least then I could hit you.”
“What’s stopping you now?”
Akane turned to stare at him. “Saotome Ranma!”
Ranma rolled her eyes. “What? Lack of a reason’s never stopped you before, ya know.”
Akane flinched. “Ranma...” Her eyes hardened. “Fine! If that’s how you feel...” She turned on her heel and ran away from the fence, off in the direction of Tofu-sensei’s former practice. Ranma thought she might be crying.
The redhead turned to the bay and leaned against the chain link fence, staring off into the water. It was dark, even here where it was shallow. Seabirds flew above it off into the distance; suddenly, a bird swooped towards the water and caught a fish.
“Heh.” Ranma was remembering the fish he’d given Kuno and wondering if it’d do its job.
But maybe it was too cruel. What right did she have to screw around with Kuno, anyway? Just ‘cause he was a jackass sometimes – who around here wasn’t a jerk at least part of the time? Ranma tossed a small stone across the water, watched it skip. Maybe it wasn’t right of her to play with people like she was; maybe she should just try and ignore what she knew. Go with the flow.
Only, she didn’t recall the flow. She was out of synch with Akane and Ryoga and Kuno and the Tendo sisters, and her father, too. She didn’t see things the same way, didn’t act like they supposed she should. She was a foriegner here, someone who scarcely spoke the language and knew the customs – not just a gaijin, but a gaijin pretending to be a native.
Ranma stared at the ocean a long time; too long. Her thoughts were lapsing into morbidity by the time she forced herself to rise, push herself off the rocky sand and back on the path home.
When she reached the Tendo household, Akane was still off – crying somewhere because of her – for the fifth time that week.
Ryoga, however, was home; and Kasumi was home. Nabiki was probably following Kuno’s ‘quest’ in hopes it would make entertaining video material. The fathers? Could be plotting the next marriage escapade.
“Tadiama,” Ranma said into the house.
“Okaeri nasai!” two voices replied.
When Ranma came into the kitchen he found an odd sight. Kasumi was holding a large, sharp carving knife in one hand and a daikon in the other. She was facing the wooden cutting board that she frequently used, and wearing an especially frilly pink apron.
There was nothing so surprising in this; but the fact that Ryoga was beside her, doing the same thing – wearing the Tendos’ plain white apron – was enough to freeze Ranma in the doorway and make her heart begin pounding a little painfully.
“Akane, I...” Ryoga’s gaze swung around to meet hers. “R-Ranma!” He seemed to want to put the cutting board, daikon and apron all out of sight at once.
Ranma stopped him. “No need, pig-boy. Already saw it all. And what’s wrong with cooking, if I may ask?”
“This is a girls’ apron,” Ryoga finally replied blandly.
“Is it? Can’t tell.” Ranma took advantage of the situation and moved Ryoga around by the hips, as though examining for some kind of mark or tag. “Nope! Don’t say ‘girl’ nowhere on it.”
Ryoga looked slightly relieved. “Kasumi’s teaching me how to cook,” he managed a little guiltily.
Ranma wondered, not for the first time, where Ryoga had gotten his overblown ideas of manliness without any kind of male role model so far as she could see.
Oh, wait a minute! Ranma paled. Could Ryoga’s male role model be... me?
“W-what are you making?”
Ryoga seemed even more flustered that she was interested in the recipe. “Um...”
“Daikon stew,” Kasumi supplied quietly, her expression quietly puzzled as she watched Ryoga stammer around the smiling redhead.
“Daikon stew!” Ranma echoed. “Sounds good. I’m sure you’ll be a great cook, Ryoga.”
Ryoga frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean!”
Ranma suddenly had an almost overwhelming urge to kiss the angry expression off of his face until he held her so tight that they... She shook her head suddenly. Bad thoughts. Bad! “Ano... it means that you can follow directions?”
The words were out of her mouth before she quite knew what she was saying.
“So you’re saying I’m going to be some kind of awful cook, right, because I can’t follow directions? Because I couldn’t find my way from the house to the school! That’s it! You’re such a jerk, Ranma. I should’ve known better than to let my guard down in front of you for a second.”
“Ryoga, I–”
“Listen, I can’t cook, okay? And I’m by myself on the road, all right? So any time I can pick up a good recipe I’ll listen! Especially from a cook like Kasumi. That all right by you?”
“Ryoga.” Ranma put both hands on his shoulders. “Breathe.”
“What! Get your hands off of me, you condescending –”
Kasumi slipped in between the two martial artists, literally and figuratively. Suddenly she was in the space between Ranma’s arms and Ryoga’s chest. “Dears. Please.”
Ranma jerked her hands from Ryoga’s shoulders as though she’d been stung, feeling a tightness in her chest that signified a coming breakdown. Hold it back. Hold it back. Akane’ll get over it.
Ryoga suddenly looked confused and uncomfortable, a faint flush blooming on his cheeks.
The world was going faint and dim, dying out at the edges. Ryoga will... Ryoga will trust me someday...
“Ranma?” Kasumi’s voice was soft. “What is going on in this kitchen?” She actually frowned at Ranma. “What is going on in this house?”
Ryoga didn’t notice Kasumi’s glare. “I’m sorry, Kasumi. I... I let my temper get the better of me. Again. Please; it’s my fault.”
Ranma’s eyes widened at the admission, the kitchen brightening and steadying around her. “I... thanks. Er... I said something stupid. I really did mean you could follow directions. Other than losing your way, I’ve... I’ve never seen you screw up anything like that.”
Ryoga scoffed. “You can’t mean that you were serious that you thought it’d be good. You just don’t say stuff like that, Ranma. That’s Kasumi’s job.”
“It’s not my job to be nice!” Kasumi suddenly interjected.
“Kasumi...” Ranma whispered. “Aw, Kasumi... don’t...”
“Don’t what? Don’t get upset? I’m not allowed? That’s certainly odd, because everyone else seems to be allowed,” Kasumi said in a quiet voice that mounted in tension as she spoke. “Even Nabiki. And father has a nervous breakdown every day! But I have to be the strong one... the nice one...”
Ranma grabbed hold of Kasumi and squeezed.
“You idiot, don’t take advantage of Kasumi’s kindness!” Ryoga shouted.
“This isn’t taking advantage! This is holding someone who’s upset!”
Ryoga suddenly fell silent.
Uh oh. I said something wrong?
Ryoga’s silence continued.
Why isn’t he saying something? Poor Kasumi. She’s got way too much going on right now...
“The divorce papers... came... this morning...” she whispered into Ranma’s ear.
Ranma stiffened. “Oh, Kasumi...” She increased the pressure with which she was hugging the other girl.
“He mailed them!”
“I know, Kasumi.”
“He’s a coward!”
“I know.”
“D-di-v-vorce?” Ryoga stammered. “Kasumi?”
“Shut up about it, pig-boy!” Ranma snapped. “Don’t breathe a word about this!” Ranma stroked Kasumi’s back gently. “You’re entitled to the occasional breakdown, too, Kasumi,” she assured the older girl. “You don’t have to be quiet and you don’t have to be nice. You don’t have to be anything you don’t wanna be. Okay?”
Kasumi was drying her eyes on Ranma’s hair. “I know. I know.” She withdrew, wiping her eyes. “Oh, Ryoga-kun, I’m so sorry! Crying, and in front of a guest!” She shook her head. “And over such a silly thing: just one night with one man, that happened to go awry!” Her smile reappeared. “I’m still a teenager! I’ve got my whole life ahead of me...”
Ryoga took her hand and patted it comfortingly. “You’re right, Kasumi. You’re pretty; you’re a great cook. There are plenty of guys out there who would love to have you.”
Kasumi flushed. “You think?”
“Sure,” Ranma agreed. “And besides being pretty and good in the kitchen, you’re clever and resourceful. And sweet.”
“I don’t know about all of that,” Kasumi protested. “Come on, you two. Why don’t we all make dinner, together?”
So it was that a highly uncomfortable silence descended over the kitchen. While Ryoga and Kasumi chopped, Ranma claimed another apron and began rooting through the cupboard for ingredients. In contrast to their earlier argument, none of the three cooks seemed to get in one another’s way. Ranma moved from the cupboard to the stove to the sink with relative ease, ducking around Ryoga’s slower and more obvious motions in the kitchen. Through it all Kasumi supervised, directed and corrected with gentle but implacable motions.
Soon, good smells moved through the kitchen.
Ranma realized she was smiling happily at Ryoga and assiduously turned her attention to scrubbing pots and pans.
That was a lot easier to think about than everything else. Simple, easy.
Ryoga’s hand landed on her wrist.
She jumped what felt like half a foot into the air. “Ryoga?”
He was pulling her arm out of the sink and examining it. “Hey, you burned yourself.”
“Yeah, whatever,” Ranma said, but inside she was beginning to feel that imminent breakdown rising in her like a tsunami, the whole world fuzzing, her consciousness narrowing until the only thing that existed was the light pressure of his skin on hers. “Can I have my hand back, please? Thanks.”
Ryoga released her with an odd, vulnerable expression on his face, obviously having some sort of internal argument. After a moment he turned away from her a little too quickly to be natural, and moved out of the kitchen.
She didn’t feel she could reassure him or exploit that vulnerability, either one. She’d done a little bit too much exploitation, of late.
Author’s Notes:
I kind of enjoy this half of the story a bit more than the other. I think it’s the fact that Ranma is keeping her emotions in check and having to keep her knowledge of Ryoga secret that does it. Maybe it raises the tension.
Then again, there’s enough tension between Ranma and Ryoga in the other timeline... Hmm, maybe that’s not it.
So which timeline is your favorite?
1 Hinako is not a very well-known character, so let me briefly explain who she is. Hinako was hired by Principal Kuno because she had a reputation for taming wild students. It is later revealed that she was trained by Happousai, and is a student of Anything Goes. She sucks chi from her victims using anything rounded with a hole in the center; typically she uses coins, which are easy to cart around. In the process of sucking ‘fighting spirit’ from her victims, her appearance shifts from that of a ten year old to that of a far sexier, older woman. She is Ranma and Akane’s English teacher.
2 Like all of the students who attend Furinkan, Daisuke is able to bounce back from an attack just about automatically.
3 Which goes to show that she was more thrown than she’d ever been in her entire life.
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