You Know You're in Guard when....
- You walk in step to all music you hear.
- You spin pencils/pens/mops/brooms/pool cues, etc.
- You have a drawer full of flag t-shirts.
- You're constantly involved in fund raisers (wanna buy a candy bar?)
- The term attitude has lost all meaning.
- You know where every highschool in your circuit is located.
- You are an expert at assembling backdrops.
- When you hear a song you've done a routine to you get ecstatic.
- When you hear a song by a group you used you get ecstatic.
- You know how to wrap your own bandages.
- You have a flag callus on your right palm under your small finger.
- You have more inside jokes than any of your other friends.
- You can smiles genuinely on command.
- Your priorities are slightly askew (like you're more worried about the fact that your silk is getting un-taped than your sister's nose is broken…)
- You have an excuse for everything.
- You can catch anything thrown at you.
- Every song becomes a possible flag routine.
- You know the perfect spot for a toss in your favorite songs.
- Finals are a positive thing.
- Your calluses are less stressful than practice.
- You know that "one more time" never means one more time.
- You can do your hair and make-up anywhere.
- You can change into your uniform anywhere.
- Someone who can throw a piece of wood 40ft in the air and catch it becomes your hero.
- You find yourself designing flags/uniforms/drill in your classes.
- You use two hands to tell your left from your right.
- You count all music to beats of 6 or 8.
- You constantly watch t.v. dance shows for a good new move.
- Watching a 1/2 show has become more then a leisure activity.
- Leaving your seat at 1/2 time would be considered a sin.
- Lycra-spandex has become a permanent part of your closet.
- The soles of your practice shoes have holes in them from doing to many turns.
- You've left your house wearing things you swore you never would like spandex, 2 tons of makeup, etc.
- You find yourself critiquing every parade you see.
- You will not consider anything over $5 dinner while at a competition.
- The band house becomes your home away from home.
- You become your own pharmacist. (Midol….)
- Anyone who carries feminine products becomes your best friend.
- You know how to manage lotsa girls and 1 bathroom.
- You wish they offered time/money/stress management in school.
- You wish they offered naptime in school.
- The term battle of the sexes has been turned into battle of the bands/guards.
- You can mock all other bands/guards quite well.
- 4 1/2 hours of sleep before a competition is considered lucky.
- You know what jell-o arms and legs feel like.
- You've considered dating a band/percussion member or have dated one.
- Your parents know of more high school now than when they were in it.
- Asking your parents for money has reached the extreme.
- Having your show finished the day before your first competition/performance is considered lucky.
- You know nothing is ever definite.
- Getting 1 new uniform a year is a rarity.
- You're the last people to hear about the pep rally and the first the perform at them.
- Coming home before 4:30pm on a weekday almost never happens.
- You've spent more money on flags than you have on your education.
- You've never worked so hard for a chunk of wood w/some metal on it (trophy).
- You never could teach your dog to fetch cause everything you throw you have to catch yourself.
- No matter how good your guard is you still get the smallest coverage in the yearbook.
- Your guard has developed its own language.
- You know that if you try something weird it might just end up in your show.
- The term democracy is not in your vocabulary.
- You try more stunts than the cheerleaders.
- You learn to love your instructor when you see other guards' shows and uniforms.
- You went to every school football game but never paid for one.
- Your nails have never extended beyond your fingertips.
- You know what's significant about June 14th (if not look at your calendar).
- You know how to bend any rule.
- You've never actually watched a football game.
- You can get any teacher to sympathize w/you and let you off for that missing assignment.
- You say guard halt when you want your friends to stop.
- You have had more pics taken of you than any of your friends.
- You can arm wrestle any band/chorus/drama/cheerleading member and win.
- You have electrical tape in your backpack.
- You have hit yourself in the head w/a flag more times than you would like to think about or can think about!
- Your friends have had to sedate you for using a measuring stick and/or musical instrument bow to practice tosses.
- You walk in step with your guard friends.
- You can talk about practically anything at practice and competitions no matter who's around.
- You march to the back ground music in the mall.
- You jazz walk/run at home, school, mall, etc.
- You do split leaps down every hall you come to.
- Every time you find a bruise/scrape on yourself, you automatically know you got it at a guard rehearsal.
- You've used up all the white out covering up the marks on the ceiling/wall from the rifle you WEREN'T spinning in the house...and need more. (so true….)
- You cheer louder than the cheerleaders at football games.
- When you are together so much (because of practice or just getting together) that you all get your period at the same time!
- When your instructor feels she has enough on the job training to look for a 2nd job as a hairstylist/makeup artist to supplement her income during the summer
- When all your "outside the guard" friends roll their eyes and whisper not again, as u talk about how cool your show is, and how u manage to "nail" your tosses every time.
- When you can drop spin and carry on a conversation, and jazz step all at the same time, with out even thinking about it.
- When you point your toes in your sleep.
- When you get teary eyed when you have to put your flag down so you can eat dinner.
- When Colorguard is practically all you talk about!
- When your colorguard friends are all you talk to.
- When you spend 10-15 hours of your day practicing on spinning!
- When you spend all your free time looking at band related websites.
- When you look at the websites of other bands in your area just to get the inside info on their show.
- Your out of guard friends have heard so much about guard, they are almost pros at it!
- When you've left more bruises on band members (especially the drumline!) than on yourself, and are proud of it!
- Your friends notice bruises on you and you didn't even know that they were there!
- When it becomes a game to see how many patches and buttons fit on a letter jacket
- When you have one giant brown grass spot in the backyard from practicing so much
- When stadium nachos and hot dogs are a delicacy
- When not wearing underwear for fear of pantylines is a constant thing
- When you have 4 tan lines-tee shirt, gloves, shorts, and socks
- When the words 'one more time' really mean 15 more
- When Gatorade, cheeseballs, and fruit loops is the breakfast of champions
- When you can see yourself trying to make your make-up darker
- When you forget how to count above 8
- You make up routines in your head to songs on the radio
- When you try and guess the height of the guard by the size of the pole
- When you have a roll of duct tape next to your bed
- When school nachos actually taste good
- When you have 10 silks folded in your garage
- When the blisters on your blisters don't hurt anymore
- When you look for flags in commercials that show bands (in The Fugitive, during the parade, they show a guard. I swear!!!)
- When you own a copy of every show you've ever done
- When band music actually begins to sound good
- When you refuse to date outside the band (I'm safe from this one for now thankfully…)
- Life? What's that?
- When you always step off on the left foot
- When you see the guard more than your family
- When you name your equipment
- When the only song you have stuck in your head is your marching show from 2 years ago
- When you roll step in the mall
- When you begin to look good in show make-up
- When you break a bone and still insist that you can march (even if on crutches)
- When you still spend the same amount of time with your band-after you graduate
- You only go to football games to see the halftime shows
- You find yourself switching feet to get back on-step while walking through the mall
- When you catch yourself spinning your pencil in Algebra class.
- When all your teachers and classmates have seen your guard videos at least twice.
- When your classmates roll their eyes at you for talking about the band, yet again.
- When everyone knows that you are in guard by the t-shirts you wear.
- When the people at Prown's know you by name.
- When vending machine food becomes gourmet.
- You have had the words "left! right! left! right!" repeatedly screamed at you and you are not in the army
- You permanently project to the press box
- You toss your flag even when they are 50 m.p.h. winds
- When the local Diner is you second home, but only because you spend more time at school
- When you always have to walk in step, even if the people you're with aren't in colorguard
- When you go to see other school's football games just to see their colorguard, and who you're up against.
- When you in your loud english class your teacher yells, "Attention" and you look forward and sit up straight and don't make eye contact with anyone.
- You love rainy days, because it gives you a chance to spin (your umbrella) in school (And show off too!)
- Your nonguard friends know that you're almost never available to go out
- You jump up and down when you hear a song that a guard once did
- Guard tape is the best thing that has happened since sliced bread
- Guard tape fixes everything
- You find yourself dancing everywhere
- Getting new members is the most exciting thing that happened to you
- You listen to the judges tapes more then the radio
- The only jacket you own has the name of your guard on it
- You look forward to getting new gloves
- You love the black stain from the new gloves
- You know how to sleep with the your music on 10 and the bus going 60mph
- You have seen more skin from the same sex then the opposite
- You can talk about "your body" with ease
- It all seem to be a soap opera with ups and downs
- You miss some one you saw 5 minutes ago
- You see the same people all day everyday
- You spend more time with the guard then your own family
- You have practice 5 days a week and enjoy every second
- Your friends have heard about your routine so much that they can probably get out on the field and do your routine with you!
- You have become so accustomed to waking up at 5 am that you do it when you don't have to. (Saturdays, Sundays, days w/ no school or marching practice.)
- You can march your show in your sleep
- You say the pledge of allegiance to YOUR flag
- While your non-guard friend sleep with teddy bears and other various stuffed animals, you sleep with your flag
- You almost died from a frosh's toss gone bad (cough cough Erika cough cough)
- If you catch yourself doing air flag while walking down the hallway or while you are sleeping!
- If you think you will die when the season is over.
- When you make a website dedicated to guard.
- When you have prayed all season for a break before the next season, then you spend the whole time crying, cause your muscles aren't used to resting for that long.
- When you like wearing your uniform.
- When people ask you about your social life and you say "Oh, you mean my flag.
- When you can show up to practice in your pajamas and dripping wet and no one notices.
- When "armed guard" means a girl with a pole instead of a guy with a gun.
- When you subconsciously start practicing with a pencil.
- When numbers past 8 aren't important.
- When you'd rather practice than read this list.
- You have more bruises, scars, and injuries than a military solider
- You find yourself watching your show from freshman year thinking was I ever that bad?
- Weekends are forever lost to practice
- When you stand at parade attention to say the pledge to the flag at school
- When you can do drop-spins at any tempo with ANYTHING (pencils, forks, brooms, air)
- When you actually like to watch the Thanksgiving Day parade for the bands, not those stupid balloons
- When you are rivals with all the cheerleaders
- The funny smell in the guard room in no longer noticeable to you
- When there is a possibility it will snow, and your competition will be cancelled, you pray that it won't snow
- When you spend all your money at competitions on guard shirts, boxers, etc. instead of food
- You can mimic all the announcers in your circuit
- Prown's (Hardware/everything store) is you favorite place to shop.
- You've eaten out more then anyone you know.
- Your non-guard friends think you're crazy because you've always got songs that they've never heard of stuck in your head.
- You've used the word "FRESHMAN!" more then a billion times.
- Your guard instructor invites you to perform at her wedding. (Soon we hope……he he he)
- You mark time in the shower or whenever standing still.
- Your best friend becomes a six-foot pole and three foot silk
- You listen to your guard tapes as you fall asleep
- Your family knows your entire show, inside and out
- You get a shock from leaving the guard room because the air is so CLEAN
- When you have no problem at all telling one of the members of your guard that they smell and they are not offended
- When your little sister plays with, touches, or even LOOKS at your equipment, you jump on her like a lion on a mouse
- You've got a special section of your wardrobe labeled "Guard Clothes" that you'd never be caught dead in anywhere but practice.
- You go into Prown's and ask for flag tape.
- Electrical tape is used for everything (i.e. labeling cabinets, putting up posters, fixing your flag bag, etc.)
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