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UNDERTAKER!

  • "In all my years here, I don't think I've ever seen quite so many assholes gathered in one place!" Undertaker

  • "One more word Michael Cole, and I'll stab you in the face." Undertaker
  • “Say 'WHAT?' if you want to have sex with your sister!” The Undertaker
  • "Listen, if you've got beef with me, I aint a hard guy to find. I stand 6'10, I weigh 330lbs, and I'm usually kicking the hell out of somebody." The Undertaker
  • "You can not kill that which is already dead." The Undertaker
  • "I'll walk straight through the fires of hell to face you, Kane." The Undertaker

  • "I'm Diamond Dallas "The Undertaker is SO going to kick my ass" Page!" UT interview

  • "I may not dress like Satan anymore, but I’m still down with the devil." UT

  • "I’m going to knock your teeth so far down your throat, you can chew your own ass out for pissing me off!" UT to Kurt

    Lesnar referred to himself as "the face of WrestleMania" during the WM19 conference, to which the Undertaker responded to by saying "It's nice to see that the face of WrestleMania has a big black eye."

  • WWE.com: "Any injuries you want to report [SummerSlam 2002]?"
  • Undertaker: "Nothing that's not going to keep us from doing what we've got to do tomorrow on RAW. That's what trainers and tape are for."

  • "How does it make me feel. Well Kevin Kelly let me ask you this: if you were Triple H, wouldn't you have taken the night off? You're damn right you would've! You see, Triple H can take as many nights off as he wants - I'm a patient man. In fact, he can hide behind McMahon, he can hide behind his skank old lady, and he can hide behind all the cops he wants - but there's one thing that he can't hide behind. And that's the fact that WrestleMania is six days away. He can't hide from the fact that in six days, I'm gonna step off in his ass. And he can't hide from the fact that there ain't a damn thing that he can do about it. You see, sixteen staples - (removes hat) SIXTEEN STAPLES and the taste of my own blood - that didn't piss me off - what it did, made me hungry, and the only thing that's gonna stop that hunger are these soupbones right here, covered with Triple H's blood. Now as far as Rock and Austin go, I understand them boys got their own issues and I can respect that. But if they're not on the same page tonight, Rock nor Austin may make it to WrestleMania. You got anything else? I didn't think so."
  • "Two things: first, I don't know if you realise it or not, but you're trespassing on private property. You see, when you walk through here, through these ropes... you're in my yard. And I can tell you this - you don't wanna be here. Bad things happen in my yard. Bad things have been happening here for a very long time. I think they call it a Decade of Destruction. Hell, you oughta know that better than anybody else, because while you were scratching and kicking and clawing- *motions to Stephanie* and screwing - your way, your way to the top of the mountain, ya see - I was burying people underneath that mountain makin' it bigger all the time. And that brings me to my second point: yeah, you come a long way in seven years. You play the game real well. In fact there may be a day when you even run the yard - but this ain't your day, boy. Now I heard you say you beat the Rock, you beat Austin, you beat this guy, you beat that guy - yeah, that's real good - good for you, Triple H! But I'm gonna let you in on somethin' - I ain't the People's Champion, I ain't no Rattlesnake - I'm the Dead Man. And if you try me...I'll make you famous. Because it's like this, little man, you ain't EVER beat me. Now I don't LIKE you, I don't RESPECT you, and I sure as hell don't fear you. But seein' how you're standing in the middle of my yard...I will break you."
  • "Kane, would you show Mr. Regal what happens when you get upset?" *Kane points off camera and a trashcan starts burning.*
  • "There’s no shame in going out there- and getting our ass kicked." Undertaker's very true words to the WWF side
  • "...But what I wanna know - who was it that told Triple H and Austin that beatin' up commentators and women made them badasses. Do you know?..."
  • Taker to Steven Richards after he and Kane kick his ass "Hey! Hey you! *slaps him in the face to wake him up* You know, if I was you...I'd forget about the good fight and find myself a good woman"
  • "Since when did -you- become the voice of reason?" Undertaker to Kane
  • "Hey [Jericho], I don't know who you are or who you think you are, but judging from that peach fuzz you're trying to grow on your chin, I can tell I got more shower time than you've got ring time, and if you ever, and I mean ever, decide to interrupt me again, it will be your last time...and that is a promise." The Undertaker the first time him and Y2J met
  • "I don't make mistakes... I bury them."
  • "I've crippled more people than polio."
  • "Austin, if you're lyin' to me, I'monna rip your heart out." Taker to SCSA after Austin said that HHH was the one that called his wife and the police
  • "All right I'm gonna make this short and sweet - and it looks like you got the short end already taken care of. That's what happens when people try to make a name for themselves at my expense. Jeff Hardy, I think he learned a valuable lesson, I hope everybody was watchin'. In particular, I hope Triple H is watchin'. Because they say he is the best the game has to offer. Well he better bring his A game to King of the Ring, because I wanna see what he's all about - becuase this (shows belt) right here says that I'M the best. Until he has that, I guess I am. Triple H, you can beat all the monitors, and all the equipment up that he wants, but that equipment, it don't fight back - I do. And I also hurt people - not TV equipment. Anything else? I didn't think so."
  • Taker: "Next time, KNOCK!" after the Big Show comes bursting into their locker room looking for the Hardyz and they (Kane and Taker) beat the crap out of him...
  • "Now - do I have your attention? I said, do I have your attention? GOOD. Now I don't know what's wrong with this boy right here...but I don't know who he thinks he is. But let me tell you who I am. I'm the NEW WWE Undisputed Champion! And as that champion, I have the right to come down that ramp first and start Monday Night RAW. And now that I am Champion, there are gonna be some changes around here. When I feel like I have somethin' to say...I'm gonna come down here and say it. And if there happens to be somebody standin' in this ring, they got two choices. One, they can move aside - or two, they can stay and get their ass kicked. It don't matter to me. Now RVD, he just got reacquainted with the #1 rule of this company, and that is you WILL respect The Undertaker. Now you need to shut up and listen to this. If anybody's got a different opinion, they might need to go down to the bus station and ask Hollywood Hulk Hogan what it's like to disrespect The Undertaker. Because I did exactly what I said I was gonna do...Now this is the story. I said I was gonna beat Hulk Hogan and take his title; I did it. I beat the man up, I took his pride, but most of all...what I did last night was kill Hulkamania. It's over! Now check this out - Hulkamania - rest - in - peace. You can yell all you want, he's not gonna come. In fact, I got it - I got it by good authority that Thursday night on SmackDown!, Hollywood Hulk Hogan will announce his retirement. And Hogan, I will expect a thank you for allowing you to walk outta the ring last night to make that announcement - because he was about THAT close from never walkin' again. Now...I'm gettin' tired o' saying it, and I'm sure you're gettin' tired of hearin' it, but I don't really give a damn what you're tired of...you will respect The Undertaker. And I don't care if you're a legend like Hollywood Hulk Hogan, or some punk like RVD - you cross my path, if you cross my path and do not change directions, you will pay the consequences. Look at this! RVD again tries to get in the ring Boy...you know, there's just some people that are thick between the ears!"
  • "Now Triple H, he's not the only one that needs to learn about respect. Now last Monday night, Jeff Hardy...he came in the Yard, he kicked me in my back, and made me land in a pile of human...vomit. He KICKED me in the back, and I landed in a pile of human vomit!

    Now Jeff Hardy, I know you're extreme...and you live for the moment, but what I'm askin' ya now, son - are you ready to DIE in that same moment? Jeff, what I'm sayin' is, we can do this the easy way - and that's you come down to the ring, I slap you around like the little bitch you are...you show me the proper respect, and I'll let you walk away. But if I gotta come back to that dressing room and hunt you out, I will inflict more pain on you than what you physically thought was possible - I will make you suffer. Now all I wanna know now, Jeff - what's it gonna be? Is it gonna be the easy way, or is it gonna be the hard way? Well, what's it gonna be?"

  • Matt Hardy "Hey Taker! This isn't about Jeff - last week, you disrespected Matt Hardy!"
  • Undertaker "Why don't you come down here and I'll disrespect you again?"

  • "Kane, until our paths cross again, I shall NEVER rest in peace!" Taker's voice over the loudspeakers, as backstage workers break open the casket and find it empty.

  • "So you're the head brother in charge now, huh? And did I just hear you say by the snap of your fingers you make things happen? Well I tell you what. Why don't you snap your fingers right now and let's see what happens." -The Undertaker to Eric Bischoff

  • Vince: "First of all, calm down."
  • Undertaker: "I AM CALM!"

    "I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired!" - Paul Bearer

    Brotherly Moments!

  • Undertaker talkng about Tajiri: "Make sure he takes his medication..."
  • Kane notes to Tajiri: "Freak."

  • Kane "Hey brother!"
  • Taker "Hey man."
  • Kane "Whatchoo doin', man?"
  • Taker "I'm waitin'."
  • Kane "Waitin'? What are you waitin' on?"
  • Taker "Just waitin'."
  • Kane "You're waitin' on Triple H, ain'tcha."
  • Taker "Maybe."

  • A happy 'Taker after showing clip of Austin and HHH saying they were the most dominant males in the WWF "Now I told you that was funny! Now, speaking for the two most dominating....forces of destruction, I don't want Triple H and Austin to feel like we're offended. We find it...pretty damn funny! Kane, you think it's funny?"
  • Kane "Oh yeah - I'm laughin' on the inside."

    Kane!

  • "You may be that damn good, but I am that damn bad!" Kane to HHH
  • "I was never picked last in kickball!" Kane to Chris Benoit
  • "You hurt Sean. You hurt me. Undertaker, Big Show, tonight I'm gonna hurt you."
  • "Triple H, tonight, I will burn, the flesh, from your body" A very unhappy Kane to a very unluckly HHH
  • "Freaks kick ass." Kane
  • "Just like the lion roars and the chicken clucks, it's a simple fact of life, X-Pac sucks." Kane

  • Kane: "Just bring it huh? Consider it brought"
  • JR: "Kane is telling Triple H to bring it!"
  • King: "Kane can't say that, the Rock says Just Bring....Kane says Grrrgrowlgrrrgrrgr"

  • “I don’t want to prove you wrong, Chris Benoit, but to all those people who call me inhuman, who call me a freak, who call me a monster, I want to prove them right!”
  • "First of all, your mammary glands don't impress me" - Kane to Trish Stratus
  • "No, that’s where you’re wrong, it’s Kane against the world”
  • "Because blood is thicker than water"
  • "What can I say? Chicks dig the mask."
  • "When I was a child, everybody stared at me. Pointed. They screamed, and they laughed, and I hated them for it. I hated the World, but I hated myself. I hated what I was. So I tried to hide it with this mask. That way, I wouldn't hear your screams, or your laughter, or feel your pity. But, you see, we all wear masks. Just some aren't as obvious as the one I wear. Some masks take a form of a handsome face with a rasied eyebrow and some catchy phrases. The man that this mask belongs to, he's cheered. He's adored. He's idolized. And he's the WWF Champion. BUT ROCK YOU AND I BOTH KNOW THAT LAST MONDAY ON RAW I HAD YOU BEAT IF IT HADN'T BEEN FOR THE INTERFERENCE OF MY BROTHER. But, last Monday Night on RAW Rock, you learned pain. You felt fear. And you found out that what hides behind -this- mask, is the next WWF Champion!"

  • "If you ain't down with me and the Big Red Machine being the WWF Tag Team champs again, Kane has got two words for you!" X-Pac (back when he was "with" Kane)

    HHH

    HHH to Eugene: "And it makes me angry! I'm very angry at Chris Benoit."
    Orton: "Me too. Are you?"
    Batista: "Yeah."

    HHH to Eugene: "Chris Benoit is nothin' but a... he's nothin' but a... A BIG JERK! I said it! Chris Benoit is nothing but a jerk! I said the j-word, that's right!"

  • "Tell you what boys, bring that big red retard with you to the ring - that is, if he can pull his nose out of the Undertaker's ass long enough." A very, very stupid HHH

    “Chris Benoit… the last time I saw you, you were the big fish in your small pond, standing in the middle of that ring, holding up a shiny belt, the standard-bearer. Well, tonight, if it comes to that, you, Chris Benoit, will get into the ring with the World Wrestling Federation’s standard-bearer!” Triple H to Chris Benoit

    "Listen Michael Cole...if I wanted shit from you, I'd squeeze your head." - HHH, "D-Generation X" home video.

  • Mick: "It's a pity your ears aren't as big as your nose, because you would have heard me say that the Rock has the night off!" HHH: "Well at least I've got 2 of them!"

  • HHH: "Jericho is gonna screw me for sure!"

  • HHH "Shane's not quite the guy I had in mind to smooch with"

  • HHH to Billy Gunn "Tonight I need you to lay down for Jericho"

  • HHH to Stephane: "Steph, I don't even know why you'd want the dog anyway...isn't one bitch in the house enough?"

  • HHH from DX UnCensored: Hey, X-Pac, you seen Billy anywhere?
  • X-Pac: It's not my fucking turn to watch him, bitch!

  • "What the hell kind of family did I marry into?" Triple H

  • "I'd like to offer my services as an anniversary gift" - Benoit to HHH
  • "You're a machine" - HHH

  • "While my wife might be his manager, after tonight, Kurt Angle's gonna be my bitch!" - HHH
  • "I love when you talk dirty" - Mick Foley

  • "There are a lot of 'bi' things that I am, but bilingual ain't one of them... did I just say that on national TV?"

  • HHH "Screw Chris Jericho!"
  • Eric "I can't screw Chris Jericho, it's done, the match has been made."
  • HHH "Listen to me - listen to me - am I the man around here? Am I the franchise player around here? Am I the world's champion? Yes I am. Then I get what I want - and I want RVD's ass tonight."

  • "There's gonna be a little game!" Stephanie announcing that she is pregnant
  • “What is the matter with you McMahon’s? Why does everything have to be on live TV?”

  • HHH “We’ve been thinking long and hard all night…”
  • Eddie Guerrero “Be careful; there’s smoke coming out of your ears.”

  • HHH: Stacy, I know you think I'm hot but you can't keep barging in here to stare at me.
  • Stacy: As if, I came here to tell you... {HHH takes off his shirt} I came here {She stares at him, and he realizes it and starts bouncing his pecs. She likes it and puts her finger in her mouth and then recovers her composure.} I came here to tell you to come to Mr. McMahon's office RIGHT NOW!
  • HHH: Stacy, you can't just make me come by telling me to.... (Stacy looks confused) nevermind, I'll be there when I'm there.

  • Billy: "Hey what part of this are you not gettin'?! Move out of that ring before we come and move you out!"
  • HHH "Now Billy, Billy - listen. I'm really glad that you and your...partner...that you and your partner have found a whole new meaning to the phrase 'suck it' - but Billy, you come to this ring, the only thing you're gonna be suckin' on is the end of this sledgehammer."

  • "Let me explain somethin' to you. I AM a lot of things...I am everything that I say I am. But the one thing that I definitely am not is a good guy. So if you feel like playin' The Game....then, Jack, I'm standin' right here." HHH to Edge

  • "Whoa, whoa - what's the matter with you? Are you scared, you nervous, what's the matter with you?" Loyd says he fears the sledgehammer. "All right, fair enough, fair enough - let me try to help you out. Is this what you're trying to get to: 'Triple H, in just three days, you are going to King of the Ring, where you're gonna face The Undertaker for the Undisputed WWE Championship. What are your thoughts?' Is that about what you were gonna say? Well let me tell you this: I AM going to get my shot. I AM going to get my chance. In three days, I AM going to get back what is mine. What I sweat for, what I bled for, what I live for. MY religion, MY law - in just three days, I get my chance at redemption...when I become the Undisputed Champion at King of the Ring. ... Now, I can see your little journalistic wheels spinning in your head - you've got another question, don't ya? You were gonna ask, lemme see... 'well that's all well and good, Triple H, but what about your match tonight with Billy?' See, this is why you are so good. This is why, when people talk about the future of SmackDown!, I think of you and I think 'we're in good hands.' HHH gives the camera a look Billy Gunn. Billy and I go a long way back to a time, an era called DX. To a time when Billy was known as Badd Ass Billy Gunn. Mr. Ass. Well you know, now that I think about it - with his relationship with Chuck right now and that partnership, maybe they *still* call him Mr. Ass, I don't know. But, you see, last week I told Billy 'don't come to the ring - if you do, I'm gonna smash ya in the face with a sledgehammer.' And I did. This week I'm telling Billy: don't come to the ring, because if you do, I'm gonna kick your ass - and I will. And I AM ready for Billy's 'partner' Chuck, should he decide to get involved, and I am ready for his little mutton-chop wearing cabana boy Rico if he gets involved too. Because I AM going to King of the Ring - and I AM going to become the Undisputed Champion. Because I AM The Game. And I AM That Damn Good. Any other questions? You did a great job, kid."

  • Triple H to Angle: "I mean, you'd like to be friends with Steph. You'd like to hang out with Steph...you'd like to, maybe, go shopping for drapes with Steph. Hey, Kurt, look - don't get upset, okay? There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. This is the year 2000 - alternative lifestyles are perfectly acceptable in this day and age! Kurt, if you're batting off the other side of the plate from the rest of us, that's okay! And I understand - Kurt, I can understand you're upset right now, okay? Maybe national television wasn't a good place for me to call you out on this, but it explains a lot, Kurt - all the looks ya been givin' me and the little smirks? I mean, who are you trying to get close to here?"

  • HHH "Kane, this is just advice, but next time you try to accost somebody by sticking them into the trunk of a car, you should try to make sure that the trunk does not have one of those child safety latches on the roof - I mean, you can just pull it and jump OUT of the trunk before the person even drives off. Just a bit of advice..."

  • HHH "Well Katie, it's - it's nice to finally meet you after all this time."
  • 'Katie' 'Well it's nice to meet you to, Triple H. And let me tell you something, good God are you sexy!'
  • HHH "Katie....well, you're right, you're right, I am."

  • Hurricane Helms "Triple H! You seem to be in a pretty good mood! But last Monday night, when RAW went off the air and Kane had you stuffed in the trunk of that car, you were not laughing - oh no not at all! And now, you're all smiles, you're all chuckles, you're all giggles - what's up with that?"
  • HHH "Let me tell you what's up with that, you little comic book freak...nothing is up with that, nothing happened to me last week. I got out of the trunk of the car, I pulled the little safety latch, the trunk popped open, I jumped out and got away."
  • Hurricane "Is that so - is that so so so - well then explain to the Hurricane, the Hurrifans and the Kane-enites - explain the footage that I acquired from a local hospital later that night of YOU, Triple H, in the operating room?"

  • HHH Let me tell ya something, Coach - this is the thing. I don't usually admit stuff like this, but I gotta tell ya - quite frankly, I'm - I'm *scared* o' Kane tonight. I mean, let's face it - last time Kane was in a coffin, he got highly aroused and forced himself on Katie Vick's dead body. Now, what I'm hoping is when we get out there tonight, Kane doesn't get any...'special' feelings towards me when we get near that coffin, you know what I mean? Come on, let's face it - last week, Kane told me he wanted to SCREW me in the trunk of a car. I mean, I ask you - now, I got a message for Kane - Kane, let me tell you this: I am not your type, okay? I am interested in purely KICKING your ass and nothing else. Got me? So you just keep your little burnt up banana in its hammock and you and I will get along just fine."

    HHH-HBK (mostly slashy sounding quotes... but, what else would you expect from those two?? ^__^)

  • "Yeah, that's what I heard all week long - I've heard people tell me how disappointed they were and how upset they were that I would attack my best friend, Shawn Michaels...let me set the record straight for you people, Shawn Michaels and I were never best friends. I used Shawn Michaels to get to the top, just like Shawn Michaels used me to STAY at the top. You see, 'cause all o' this, all of this right here, this is just a game - this is just a business, and the fact is, I'm the better businessman. You see, because I've held more world titles, I've headlined more pay-per-views, I've sold out more arenas than Shawn Michaels could ever have hoped to do on his best day. I am better than Shawn Michaels was even in his prime. That's the sound right there, that sound, people chanting 'Triple H, Triple H,' you don't think I heard that crap three weeks ago when that DX music hit? I heard each and every one of you erupt. And that's why I did it, that's why I did it, Shawn, because it's that same sickening sound that's been eating away at me for the last eight damn months. That sound, 'Tri-ple-H - Tri-ple-H' - that made me sick, that made me soft, that made me weak to the point where I would get beat by a piece of crap like Hulk Hogan...but the fact is, and you can boo that all you want, but the fact is, I'm no different than any o' you. Because the reality is, you used me. Each and every one of you used me, and I gave you just a little bit of myself every day, and every day that I gave you more of myself, I got weaker. Well, it all stops today, right here, right now, it all stops. And if you're pissed off, it's because I'm tellin' ya the truth, just like I'm telling Shawn Michaels the truth when I tell him that I am coming to SummerSlam not to fight him, not to defeat him, but I am coming to maim you, Shawn. I am coming to end your career, I've done it before, In This Very Ring I have ended careers....yours will be no different. Shawn, you wanna tell your son, you wanna show your son what it means to be a man? Then when this is all said and done, Shawn...you take your son, and you put him in your lap while you're sitting in your wheelchair, and you point out to him what a real man looks like. You point me out to him on TV, Shawn. Shawn, at SummerSlam--" HHH cut off by The Rock

  • "You see, Shawn Michaels...you don't have the stroke around here you had a couple years ago when you were pushing around Vince McMahon - I'm not Vince McMahon. I'm Eric Bischoff. And quite frankly, you don't have an alternative."
  • "I recognise you're Eric Bischoff. And it's high time YOU recognise that I'm Shawn Michaels. I don't need stroke around here - I've been here for fifteen years - everybody knows I don't react to ultimatums real well. I don't know how you feel about this, and I'm really sorry buddy...but when I'm given a choice of your way or the highway...HBK *always* takes the highway."

  • HHH "Shawn--"
  • HBK "GET offa me."
  • HHH "Calm down!"
  • HBK "What do you mean, calm down?! I've got news for you, I've been around here for fifteen years. I have earned the right to do what I want. You of all people oughta know I've got a big problem with people tellin' me what to do. Look, I KNOW you came to RAW because o' me - but that was your choice. I did NOT choose to work for Eric Bischoff!"
  • HHH "Oh right - I came here because of you - and now you gonna walk out on me, Shawn? Huh? You gonna walk out on me? No, you're gonna walk out on everybody, it's not just me, it's the fans, too - Bischoff was right. What's the matter, Shawn, huh? Is it because he told you what to do? Would bein' my manager REALLY be that bad? You - with your back injury - you can't even work anymore. Shawn, would being by my side be THAT bad?"
  • HBK "Look! I of all people know that I am not the showstopper ANYMORE! But I have still got my pride. Where's it gonna stop? Checking you into the hotel, carrying your bags? YOU TELL ME!"
  • HHH "DAMMIT Shawn I'm not asking you to be my personal lackey! I'm askin' ya not to walk out the door. I'm asking you not to take your ball and go home like Stone Cold did. Please, Shawn - all I'm asking you to do is lets make the ride together. If you'd just calm down, Shawn, and just stay - let me think this through. I think I've got an idea that'll make this all work."
  • HBK "You'd better have a good idea."
  • HHH "Shawn, just stay, all right? 'cause I promise you...if I can work this out...this'll be damn good."

  • HBK "Whoa whoa whoa! Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa - Kevin, Kev, take it easy. Big Show, back off. Come on - enough of this tough love crap! It is not each other we wanna destroy, it's Booker T, and believe me, he knows it! That's why he ran outta here, hellbent. That's why he's headed south right now, back to Boston. Booker T, we know it was you that took out X-Pac, and come next week, the NWO is gonna take YOU out. Now, I need you two animals...calm down. I gotta big, BIG announcement to make. The NWO is a family. Now, believe me, I'll admit it, we are somewhat of a dysfunctional family, but we are a family, nonetheless. Like all families, we're not the same when one of our family members is missing, and right now, one of our family members is injured. Now I know what you're thinking, but I can assure you, it's not X-Pac. No, this family member is sitting comfortably at home - recuperating. In fact, I can assure you, he's sittin' there watching us right this minute. Now, those of you that saw King of the Ring, you know who I'm talkin' about...you saw it, you felt it, you felt that electricity - you felt that undeniable chemistry - when we all came together. That's why...in the very, VERY near future - right here In This Very Ring, you will see standing alongside X-Pac, Big Show, Kevin Nash, and yours truly, HBK Shawn Michaels, none other than the newest member of the New World Order....we're good, but we're gonna be better - HE's good, but he's gonna be better - because it will be, no one other...than Triple H! Now....now, you two...let's finish this. Kiss and make up."

  • "Triple H...don't hunt what you can't kill. And what goes around (displays sledgehammer) is definitely gonna come around." HBK

  • "Lord knows, if it's on the internet, it's got to be true!" Shawn Michaels