Getting the guys from Human Nature to 'air their dirty linen' was much easier than anticipated. There was no arm twisting or clever trickery involved. In fact, Toby, Phil, Andrew and Michael were only too glad to dish the dirt on each other.

The Victim : Toby

A: He's the tallest. I think that's a good place to start. And he's the most independant having lived pretty much out of home since he was 11-years-old. haha!
M: He's very compulsive. A compulsive CD player.
A: [cutting in jokingly] A compulsive wanker. haha! [they all get hysterical] Print that one - I dare you!
M: We were in America and CDs were about two dollars cheaper. At home he never would have bought 20 ot 30 CDs, but because they were cheaper he bought about 30 of them.
P: He doesn't really have an embarrassing record collection.
M: Andrew and I bought him an embarrassing record once though. It was called 'The Lonely Shepard and 20 Other Pan Flute Favourites'.
T: That only reflects on yourself and Andrew's taste. I played it though, because it's got 'Take My Breath Away' on it. hahaha. If you haven't heard a pan flute version of that then you're missing out.
A: He used to be the worst with money. He's get subpoenas for his VISA card because he never used to pay his debts. He had to put his mobile phone on hold because he couldn't pay back the Optus bill. In the end he moved to Telecom and got a new phone. hahah
P: Toby can sleep anywhere and everywhere. You're driving along and 30 secondsa after getting into the car, he's asleep. He falls asleep on planes before it even moves. When we share a hotel room on tour, Toby gets into bed, says goodnight and not 30 seconds later you hear zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.[loud snoring]
T: That's yet to be taped so I don't believe that I'm a snorer.
M: Oh he's a big snorer
A: Toby also thought he was a poet once. He wrote a poem called 'The Seal'
T: I've still got a copy of it somewhere. It was called 'There Death We Seal'
A: He thought it was a moving tribute to saving the seals., but it hasn't surfaced into the Greenpeace must read list yet.
M: He has this annoying habit of recycling bodily waste
P: He's constantly biting the little bits of skin off the sides of his fingernails.
A: If Human Nature don't become successfl he was going to release his own album called 'Toby Whistles 20 Scottish Love Songs'
T: Yeah, it was inspired by the 'Pan Flute' Album.

The Victim : Andrew

M: Andrew would probably be the rudest of us all
P: Without meaning to be
M: Sometimes he'll just say something without thinking about the consequences
T: He's got no tact whatsoever and he's very tasteless with his jokes sometimes. We'll get onto some kind of topic whether its sex or something and Andrew's always the one that comes out with the most disgusting comment. It just finishes the conversation right then and there.
P: Andrew had the best driving record. hahaha. He's written off two cars and I don't know how many parking fines - he's the parking fine king.
M: He's the most forgetful one of us too. He's always going 'Where's my wallet?' and it's in his pocket the whole time.
T: He would have to be the most focused. He's not bossy but he inspires the rest of us.
M: These days he's more fashion concious. Andrew used to have a really nice hairdo. He had this big bouffant hair. In the morning he would put his head down to do it and get the blowdryer out and brush it all forward.
P: It would be pointing straight up in the air.
T: And if there was a breeze at school he would turn sidewards so the wind wouldn't mess it up.
P: Someone told us that colouring your hair was in so we all went for a change. Andrew went a pinky colour once. I went black and it made me look like a ghost. Toby'd been auburn ...
T: I went black once too but I had hair everywhere, it was aweful.
M: I was talked into putting a couple of blonde streaks in my hair once.
A: That was when he had the really wicked Dougie Howser hairdo. hahaha
P: Once we did the Midday Show when we were called The 4Trax and Mike had the Krusty the Clown hairdo. It looked really good. hahaha.

The Victim : Phil

T: Phil's the most annoying in the morning. We share a room and I'm always the first to have a shower. Sometimes I wish Phil would just get up. There's no point saying it to him because he won't do it.
M: He's always the last once down when we have to go somewhere. He's definately not a morning person.
A: He used to be the worst with cheating on girls. haha. He's changed now but his motto used to be 'an easy girl is a good girl' haha
P: I'm completely reformed now.
A: The plainest was the best. ... what was the name of that girl on the Fairstar?
T: She was very ordinary loking and Phil had these rose coloured glasses on.
A: It was the last night and she was available. It used to be anywhere we'd go we'd wonder two or three days before if Phil would try and hit on a girl
M: His famous pick-up technique would have to be chewing on a beadstick. hahaha
A: He had it in his mouth while he was eyeing the girl once. haha. [Phil tries to protest but the rest of the guys wont have it]
T: He's got the easiest temper to ignite., especially back in the 4Trax days. Once there was a particularly bad photo of Phil and one day I pulled it out and I couldn't stop laughing at it no matter how hard I tried. Andrew was laughing too but I just couldn't stop. Phil jumped up and grabbed his keys and walked out and we didn't know if he was coming back. Eventually he did.
M: He's the most money conscious. And he has the most diverse record collection. It goes from Michael Jackson to SOundgarden to ...
P: And the footy one that you and Andrew bought me.
M: It was a record of all the footy players singing covers. It was hilarious!

The Victim : Michael

T: He's the most dependant of the group. If he wants a drink he'll ask Andrew first., 'Do you want a drink?'. Often he'll get the same meal at a retstaurant just to be safe.
P: Mike owns half a car with Andrew and he's never driven it, not once! They've had it nearly two years and he hasn't had a go yet.
A: He's can't drive it and he hasn't even got his Ls. He's been saying that he's going to get them for ages but he still hasn't and it's not like we have time now.
T: Mike's the last to leave somewhere because he's always got to fluff his hair in the mirror.
M: That's only 'cos there's so much of it that you've got to check where it's at.
A: He used to be the worst dancer. He had no co-ordination whatsoever.
T: He'd dance with his heels together and his toes pointing in opposite directions. Everntualy with a lot of practice and choreography, he got the beat happening.
A: He often forgets what we're doing on stage. When we were on the Jackson tour we were performing and Michael started signing and forgot the words to one of the verses. Even last night at a performance he ended up on the wrong side of the stage and Toby had to yell for him 'Mike, what are you doing?' He almost missed one of the dance breaks.
Mike's also probably the the one who's most unrealistic. He doesn't have his license, he's never done anything other than sing. He's never worked at McDonalds or had a shitty part-time jobn like the rest of us had. Even from a young age he earnt a lot of money just from singing in a choir. So he's never known what it's like to not be able to pay back the VISA bill or change phone companies because he can't afford it.
P: If we're in a real hurry he's always th eone that slows us down. Let's say there's 50 girls waiting for autographs, we'll sign a few but then realise we've got to go. Mike insists on signing every single one. He's just a nice guy.