By Yelsha

Email: yelsha@angelfire.com

Size: ?

Date: 28 April 2001

Rating: PG

Codes: C/K, U

Summary: Based on a song my roommate and I love… Some thoughts on love and finding your one true love.

Disclaimer: Star Trek: Voyager belongs to Paramount, et. al. I Knew I Loved You belongs to Savage Garden (Daniel Jones and Darren Hayes). No copyright infringement intended.

I Knew I Loved You

I still can’t believe you’re here. It’s just… it’s like you walked out of a dream.

It’s still with me, the rush of emotion at the very site of you. Somehow, before I even knew you, I knew you were perfect, that you were everything I’d ever wanted.

So why am I fighting this feeling? Why can’t I just tell you I love you? It’s not because we’re both men. I know some people don’t…. but I know you’re not one of them. I’ve seen the approval in your eyes when you see others.

So is it because we work together? Is it because I don’t want to loose you to this crazy job we have? Is it her?

I don’t know. All I know is I feel so…

I spend hours thinking of you. Of how you smile and laugh and the sound of you voice.

Hell, yesterday I spent three hours thinking of your eyes. I could drown in those chocolate depths. Sometimes I feel like I find heaven there if I could only look long enough, deep enough.

What have you done to me? I don’t even care to make it back to the Alpha Quadrant as long as you’re here.

I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you. Maybe that’s why I won’t approach you. I’d hate to get to know you better and then lose you.

But somehow I don’t know if I really need to know much more. I’m already in too deep.

I’m head-over-heels and I don’t know if I can stop my heart from falling even more.

I’m in way too deep here.

You drive me crazy but it’s the most wonderful feeling in the world. Promise you’ll never change. You’re my perfection and I can’t have that destroyed. You’re the only one who can save me from myself.

To think my life would have to fall apart for me to find you. Life’s funny that way. But I’ll never regret knowing you. You’re like a gift from Heaven.

I know it’s crazy because I’ve never said I word, but I feel like you feel the same way. Maybe it’s wishful thinking. Maybe it’s real. I just know that when I long for you, you’re longing too.

We belong together. I just don’t know if I can make it happen. And I don’t know if you can make the first step. Maybe if we both…

It doesn’t really matter. I know eventually we’ll be together like we were meant to be.

Chakotay, I don’t know what you’d do if a lowly ensign like me walked up to you in the mess hall and kissed you senseless. I love you so much that some times I want to do just that.

I have this fantasy where I walk into the resort and I see you and Tom sitting together. I walk over and kiss you. You kiss me back, with tongue. And when I feel like you’re going to kiss me death, you pull back and say five words that melt my heart: "Finally. I love you, Harry."

If only fantasies came true.