Senseless various, pointless facts about Pokemon that no one cares about but still wants to know...
By Cassandra Jade Tinnikis
Ever notice that most facts about Pokemon, fanfics, and everything else from names to heights are usually wrong? If you didn't you're a total flake, or, as I like to say, neomaxizoomdweebie. (Go, Breakfast Club!) I will now list them to you fools who do not know any better...
1. The names are totally screwed up!!
A. Jessie's name, Jessica, according to a whole buncha sites that I went to, means, and I quote: One with wealth, gift... The second one would make a lotta
sense to one certain teenaged lavender-haired boy (Ahem! I would also like to point out that I'm a Rocketshipper, as if you couldn't notice!), but the
first one makes no sense whatsoever. Everyone knows that she grew up poor! I guess the writers were trying to make a pun... And don't email me, 'cuz I also
know that she and James were also named after gunslinger Jesse James.
B. Sabrina's name literally means "Princess"! Well, she does sit on that chair like a throne, but, I mean, c'mon! How can a Gym Leader's name be "Princess"??
C. Erika's name means "Powerful leader"! This could make sense, 'cuz she was 'leading' all those poor innocent girls to psychoneuroticism, teaching them
about perfume... But a good leader should know who and who not to recruit! She actually thought that Ash(ley) was a girl!
D. Ash's mother is crazy! She named him Ashton Ketchum! Ashton really means "Ash Tree"! That's a really weird name in itself! (He's a tree?) His last
name, I found out recently, means "Settlement". So his full name is Ash Tree Settlement!
E. Brock's name means Badger. Now that's weird. It kinda makes reason, though, because I THINK that badgers are kinda squinty eyed.... -_-
2. My Internet name makes alotta sense!
A. Think about it! Cassandra means "Fortuneteller" or "One who in flames men with love"! That really makes sense, even though I'm only eleven, because I am psychic!
B. My middle name, Jade, means "Jewel" or "To bore". I'm priceless, like a jewel, and I LOVE to bore people with speeches, long stories, and disclaimers...
3. Disclaimer is a really stupid word.
A. If you look it up in a thesaurus, it means: Surrender or abandonment. It's not like we're abandoning our fanfics! Find a new word!
4. Pokemon are not drawn to the right height!
A. Once again, think about it! Haunter is 5'3", but in the series, he was shorter than everyone!
B. Ponyta is only about 3'3", but he's taller than Ash! If you keep count, Ash is either a little under or a little over 13 years old, so he should be about 5'4" or 5'5". If Ponyta really is 3'3", then Ash should be about 2'7"!
C. The only Pokemon drawn to the right height are Team Rocket's! Arbok's taller than both Jessie and James, Weezing is visibly shorter than them both, Victreebel is 5'7", and is only a couple inches shorter than James, who is probably about 5'10", and Lickitung is way shorter than his master. Also, Meowth is 1'4", and he is way shorter than his human companions!
D. One problem with Meowth: As I mentioned above, he's 1'4"! Ever notice he shorter than Pikachu, who's 2'4"???
5. My real name makes no sense whatsoever!
A. I'll just tell you that my real name is Corin, which is Greek for hummingbird, maiden, spear or Roman goddess! None of those make any reason!
6. I talk about different subjects other than Team Rocket too much!
A. Two words: Harry Potter!!! Hermione means messenger.... Lavender means livid with color... Lily means lilac...
7. There are some names that DO make sense!
A. Much to our surprise! Misty means something other than covered with water... It means obscured! Which is kinda the same thing...
B. Joy means delight... Duh.
C. James' name actually means something other than whiner!! It means supplanter, which means one who replaces. I think I heard some where that, before James, Mondo was Jessie's partner, so it would make sense because he REPLACED Mondo!
D. Tracey's name means "Brave Fighter". I guess this could make sense, but I haven't seen any proof.
E. Cassidy's full name is Chassidei, which is a weird name, but then again, it IS the name of a Greek or Celtic goddess. It means "Clever", which kinda
describes her, except she fell for a plan that JESSIE AND JAMES made,and you have to be pretty dense to do that!
8. Some fanfic writers need to learn how to spell!
A. No names mentioned, but a lot of the bloodfest writers, and sick, twisted storywriters, either can't or won't spell right! Either that, or they can't use
grammar! Go back to English class, and quit falling asleep!