*****

"Stupid boss, stupid job, stupid friends..." Xander realized that the fact he was reduced to muttering to himself probably wasn't a good sign but it was all he could do as he stormed down the stairs to his basement. "Stupid worthless paycheck, stupid- GWAH!!!"

The vampire sleeping on his bed awoke with a start, "Bloody Hell mate! Can't you knock?"

"Knock? This is *my* room! What are you doing napping on my bed?!!"

"What?" Spike said, feinting innocence, "can't a guy drop in on an old friend?"

"We're hardly friends. You've tried to kill me remember? What are you doing here?"

"Nothing," Spike said, picking up a magazine and browsing through it.

"You have a perfectly good crypt to infest Spike." The vampire didn't look up. "What's wrong with your crypt Spi-"

"Nothing!" Spike snapped, his eyes narrowing.

Xander sighed. He shifted his weight uncomfortably from foot to foot. He stood there in awkward silence for a few minutes waiting for the oblivious vampire to offer some sort of explanation. Finally his impatience got the better of him. "Oh *Bloody Hell* Spike!" Xander exploded, doing his best to imitate the vampire's accent. "Just tell me what you're doing here, or I'll drag you back to that crypt and chain you there! There's not much you can do to stop me!"

Spike glared at him. He buried his face in his magazine and muttered something.

"What?!"

When he got no reply, Xander started advancing on the other man, trying his best to look menacing.

Spike looked up and sighed. "Oh alright you sodding git! The soldier-boys, they found my place, ransacked. They broke m' telly too, all the while muttering upsetting stake-the-hostile stuff. Don't quite fancy ending up a pile of dust myself, so if y' don't mind, I'll be rooming with you a while."

Spike immediately went back to intently studying his magazine, but Xander hadn't missed Spike's tremor of fear when he spoke of the initiative, nor did Spike miss the look of pity that crossed the boy's face.

Finally Spike looked up and met Xander's gaze.

"Oh don't give me that!" he growled. "I need your bed, not your pity."

"Can't have one without the other," Xander said. Spike snorted and went back to his magazine. Xander was quickly getting irritated by the vampire's easy escape, so he purposefully strode to the bed and snatched the offending item out of Spike's hands. He met the vampire's glare head-on.

"Why should I help you anyway Spike? Last time I saw you you were making moves on my girlfriend."

Spike snorted, an amused look crossing his face. "Don't worry pet, she's not really my type."

"Oh, I forgot," Xander said, rolling his eyes. "You usually go for insane right?"

Spike's eyes flashed but he didn't miss a beat. "No," he said, stretching luxuriously. "I usually go for brunettes."

Xander chuckled. "Well feast your eyes on these luscious locks," he said, running his hands through his hair, not sure exactly what had possessed him to say *that*.

"I am," Spike replied, almost leering at him.

Xander chuckled again, awww Spike was flirting with him. Then he sighed.

"Alright Spike," he said, "you can stay, but you are *so* sleeping on the chair!"

"What? No sodding way!" Spike pretended to be shocked but there was laughter in his voice. "I bloody *hate* that thing! There are springs poking through in all sorts of inconvenient places!" he gave Xander a half-smile. "Sorry mate, but the chair's all yours."

"Okay *mate*. There is no *way* I'm sleeping in that chair. This is *my* house you're staying at, you follow *my* rules and I'm sleeping in *my* bed!"

"Temper temper! Very possessive aren't we?" Spike exclaimed pulling away from his angry glare in mock-fright. Then his expression changed and he shifted to the left slightly, seductively rubbing the sheet to his right. "There's plenty of room for two. That is, if you don't mind cuddling with the *evil undead*." Spike raised his eyebrows and ran his tongue over his teeth.

Xander first blushed and then burst out laughing. "Alright deadboy, have it your way," he said, flopping down beside Spike. He sighed and relaxed, the coolness of the vampire's arm against his was actually soothing on the hot night. Unconsciously, he began to lean into the touch. Xander looked over at Spike and saw that his eyes were closed and his head was resting against the headboard. His face was the absolute picture of calm. Xander couldn't help wondering if the heat from his body was as welcome to the vampire as his cool skin was to Xander.

"Mate," Spike muttered amicably, the expression on his face unchanged, "my sodding arm's falling asleep."

Oops, maybe not. Xander laughed and leaned harder against Spike.

"But it's *hot*," he said in his whiniest voice, earning a chuckle from the vampire. "Besides, how can your arm fall asleep? Your blood doesn't circulate!"

"Details, details," Spike said, opening his eyes and giving Xander an irritated look. "You're heavy for a whelp, you know that?"

"Fine!" Xander sighed, reluctantly removing his arm from the vampire's. "Do you ever get cold?" he asked as an afterthought. "Like because you have no body heat?"

"What? In Sunnyhell? Not bloody likely! Alaska maybe. Here's the perfect climate for a vampire."

"Yeah? Well I really wish I had my own vampire skin blanket, cause I'm *hot*!" Xander really wished he'd perfected his whiney voice back in the plead-ice-cream-off-irritable-vendor days, but at least he'd gotten it down for Spike.

"Oh bloody Hell!" Spike exclaimed, and he threw his arm around the boy's shoulders, pulling him close. "That better pet? Will you shut-up now?"

Xander let out his best girlish giggle. Spike walked his fingers down Xander's arm seductively and then quickly snatched back his stolen magazine from the surprised boy's hands. Xander pretended to sniffle.

"And here I thought you wanted to cuddle," he complained. The vampire laughed and pulled Xander close again. "Alright Nancyboy, now you just snuggle in here, go to sleep and let Spike finish his magazine."

"A'right mate! I was 'opin' for a good ol' fashioned shag though."

Spike snorted. "Keep working on it pet. I think that was almost Irish."

Xander laughed. "Stick around a while. I'll perfect it one of these days."

Spike looked at him with a sneer on his face. "I guess it's a *little* better here than it would be having needles stuck in m' head." Despite the words Spike's eyes betrayed the gratitude he felt at Xander's disguised offer.

"Hey," the boy said softly, his eyes half-closing, "watch it. I'll send you over there with the needle-boys if you tell Anya about this."

Spike shook his head and looked at the boy with something close to affection.

"Really, go to sleep pet, you look half dead."

"Yeah? Well you're all dead," Xander said.

"You've had a long day pet and you need sleep, besides, I want to finish this magazine and I can't do that until you shut the Hell up!"

"Nice to know you care," Xander murmured already drifting off. He let his head sink down onto Spike's shoulder. "Why do I have the feeling I'm gonna wake up on the floor?"

Spike snickered. "You'll wake up in my arms pet. Though you might not be wearing quite so much clothing."

Xander laughed weakly.

"Now *sleep*," Spike ordered, starting to gently run his fingers through the boy's hair. Xander was only too happy to comply to the request. He drifted off to the sound of Spike flipping the pages of his magazine.

As soon as the boy's breathing became regular, Spike turned to look at Xander's face. He was quite beautiful really. Though he needed a haircut and perhaps an entirely new wardrobe, the boy had a certain innocent and sad quality about him that Spike found more than alluring. Xander looked so peaceful when he slept. His eyes were closed so you couldn't gaze into the brown pools and see into the soul of the child who had been neglected, abused and ignored for almost his entire life. Spike wished he could sooth every ache the boy had ever felt.

He looked away, disgusted.

'Stop being such a bleeding sap,' he chided himself. Still, he couldn't seem to stop his fingers from stroking Xander's hair. Finally he sighed, leaned over and placed the gentlest of all kisses on the sleeping boy's lips. Xander murmured something in his sleep which Spike thought sounded very much like his name.

The vampire shook his head and went back to his magazine, still growling at himself for being such a sap. He had a feeling he'd be sticking around a lot longer than it took for Xander to learn his accent.

*****
Part 2:

~I no longer pretend to have my hands on the wheel because,
I feel the magic all around you,
It's bringing me to my knees,
Like a wannabe,
I've gotta be,
Chained to you~

Spike sent Xander's alarm clock flying into a thousand pieces with one swift move of his fist. There was *no way* he was waking up to sodding Savage Garden every morning.

"You're paying for that," a sleepy voice told him.

Xander was still curled up against Spike, his head resting on the vampire's shoulder. Spike's neck had a painful crick in it from resting against the headboard all night but he wasn't about to complain. His magazine lay on the floor where it had fallen at some point during the night before. He hadn't intended to drift off, but it had been nice to wake up blanketed in Xander's warm body, despite the Savage Garden intrusion.

"You're like my own personal ice box," Xander sighed contentedly into Spike's shoulder. "I'm definitely keeping you around until I can afford air conditioning."

He started to get up.

"That'll be a bleeding long time is all you can do is deliver pizza," Spike commented.

Xander looked back over his shoulder. "A fan," he said in a decided voice, "all I really need is a fan!" And with that he headed into the bathroom. Spike smirked at the boy's retreating back.

Once in the bathroom, Xander stripped off his clothes and climbed into the shower. The water was hot and he found himself closing his eyes and imagining Spike's cool arms sliding around him. They were slippery and wet, forming a protective circle around the boy's waist as a pair of soft lips descended on his neck. Xander moaned quietly.

He snapped himself out of his fantasy, horrified. Sure, he'd finally admitted to himself that he was definitely capable of admiring members of both sexes, but *Spike*? Nope. Way off limits. You don't do people who've hurt your friends, you don't get mushy feelings about mass murderers and most importantly, you *do not*, under any circumstances, screw corpses. *Way* too disturbing a thought for words.

Xander leaned his head against the cool shower wall and sighed. There was something very wrong with him, it was now official. He began furiously jacking off. It wouldn't do any good to walk back into the room sporting his current raging hard-on. He pictured Anya, tried to think about what it felt like to be inside her, but somehow his thoughts always returned to a certain bleached blond. He finally gave in and whispered Spike's name as he came. His forehead hurt from being pressed so hard against the shower wall.

He stood there for a minute, breathing heavily. He really hoped Spike couldn't smell how turned on he was through the water. Well, he could always use the horny-adolescent-males- always-jack-off-in-the-shower excuse, not that it was far off the mark or anything. Spike would probably just laugh it off anyway. The vampire had been surprisingly easy-going and even friendly the night before. The banter was still there but it was amicable instead of hurtful. Spike definitely knew which buttons to push but for some reason he wasn't pushing them. Maybe he just wanted to place to stay.

Xander felt a smile creep onto his face. He was willing to admit that he had thoroughly enjoyed the antics of the night before. Who would have thought that Spike could be such a flirt? And with a guy no less. The idea of Spike swinging both ways didn't surprise Xander much actually. He remembered Willow describing her vamp-self as "kinda gay", and well....how could any totally heterosexual man possibly look so good in pants that tight?

But what did he have to offer a hundred-year-old vampire? Xander stepped out of the shower and started to dry himself off. Sure, Anya said he was good in the sack but what did he know about making it good for a guy? If Faith was little miss seen-it-all, then what the Hell did that make *Spike*? Why would someone that experienced want Xander? Very simply: they wouldn't.

The boy pulled his clothes on and stared at his reflection in the mirror critically. He had "unconsciously" grabbed his favourite sweater and a pair of khakis that Anya said made his ass look tight. It was probably his best outfit and he looked....passable. He knew he wasn't bad- looking but he was nothing special. Drusilla...she had been *beautiful*. she was like a dark Goddess. Spike had loved her so much that she was probably even more mysterious and alluring in his eyes, as impossible as that sounded. Suddenly the reflection staring back at Xander seemed less than adequate and he turned away quickly.

He tried to remember others that Spike had been with. Harmony? Ick. It wasn't as if Spike had actually liked her though. Besides, he said he preferred brunettes right? The only brunette that sprung to mind was Buffy's ex-boyfriend and Xander was feeling less attractive by the second. Angel was gorgeous and brooding in a tortured, billowing-coat sort of a way. Xander didn't have trouble imagining Angelus and Spike together....in fact in seemed more then likely. After all, he was Spike's sire. Xander shuddered, picturing the souled vampire and his two stunning "offspring" together in some sort of deranged family portrait. The three pairs of eyes pierced into his soul, each possessing their own unearthly beauty. Xander didn't even think he was very attractive for a human.

'Okay Xander, pull yourself together,' he thought to himself. 'You're beating yourself up over *Spike*. This is a guy who's a killer, not to mention a vampire and you happen to *hate* him in case you'd forgotten! He lets you use him as a pillow, probably just to mess with your head and suddenly you're wanting to bed him?'

Xander shook his head, exasperated with himself and turned to leave the bathroom. It was obvious Spike had been playing with him all along and it had worked. Now he was stuck with the vampire for who knows how long. He cast his eyes down in humiliation as he opened the bathroom door and walked straight past the vampire.

*****

Spike lay on Xander's bed, his head buried in the boy's pillow. It smelled like him. As did the cover on the bed, not to mention Spike himself. He felt wrapped in Xander's scent. His shoulder still tingled where Xander's head had rested all night. The boy consumed him.

He sighed and listened to the water running in the next room. And then suddenly, the air was full of pheromones. Spike practically leapt up from the bed. He had to stop himself from barging into the bathroom. He sat back down on the bed, laughing to himself. Chances were it wasn't him Xander was hot for, but as long as he could smell the boy jacking off in the shower he would certainly be able to embarrass the boy on practically any occasion. He settled back onto the bed with a satisfied smirk on his face. The running water stopped. Spike grabbed his magazine again with irritation. How long could a little shower possibly take? He skimmed through a Sex Pistols article with detached interest, drumming his fingers on the dresser impatiently.

When the bathroom door finally opened, Spike knew immediately that Xander's mood had changed. He could feel the tension radiating from the boy like smoke from a fire.

"What's the matter peaches?" Spike said in a taunting voice, easily hiding his concern. Xander just ignored him. After a moment Spike decided to try another approach. He started leering at the boy. "You look *good* pet. Those pizzas don't really need delivering do they? You could stay here....with *me*." Spike gave him a seductive smile.

The corners of Xander's mouth turned up but he turned away and started to gather up his uniform with much attention and care, refusing to meet Spike's eyes.

Spike sniffed several times. "What? Regretting last night are we pet? No more cuddling for the evil vampire?" Spike's voice trembled very convincingly.

The mental picture of William the Bloody crying was just too much for Xander, he burst out laughing. "I'll be back later," he promised. "Cuddling may follow."

Spike broke out into a broad grin. "Good," he said. "If I get lonely I'll just order some pizza for you to bring me."

Xander sighed. "For your information," he said, trying to sound irritated, "I now work at Starbucks. So you'll have to get some *really* strong sunscreen and come down for some coffee if you need me." Xander sighed to himself. He should have known a few flirty words from Spike would send him right back to where he'd started. He had to turn this around somehow.

Spike gave a disgusted grunt. "Coffee? Sod that! Can't you get a job at a blood bank or something?"

Xander's face was suddenly marred with a positively evil smile. "I'll see what I can do," he said as he sauntered over to the vampire, "anything for you, *honey*." Xander then placed a long, tender kiss on Spike's forehead and proceeded to bolt away from him.

"I'm off at six, see ya later!" Xander called as he bounded up the stairs, leaving the stunned vampire staring after him with his mouth hanging open.

*****
Part 3:

The clock on Xander's dresser glared 6:30 in its annoying red light. Spike was reduced to pacing around the room impatiently. It was bad enough that he'd slept the night away and had therefore been restless all day, but he was stuck in Xander's basement until the sun went down, which had become uninteresting after about half an hour of snooping.

Finally, Spike heard the upstairs door slam. He then draped himself across the bed, managing to look calm, content and alluring at the same time. He smiled lazily at the boy as he came down the stairs.

"How was your day at *work* pet?" Spike said in a patronizing voice.

The half-embarrassed, half-hopeful look that had been on Xander's face was quickly replaced by an icy glare. Spike finally realized how touchy that subject really was and -uncharacteristically- backed off compleetely.

"Oh don't be so irritable luv," he stuck out his bottom lip, "I missed you."

The line that had worked so well on Harmony did wonders on Xander as well. He dropped his eyes to the floor and let a faraway smile cross his face. Although Xander didn't seem to be mad at him anymore, there was obviously something else bothering the boy. Before Spike had the chance to probe further Xander asked, "What did you do all day?"

"Snooped through your stuff mostly," Spike replied with a grin. Xander's head shot up and he gave the vampire a startled look.

"Oh don't worry," Spike said with an evil smile, "I won't tell anyone."

"About.....*what*?" Xander demanded icily, images of about a dozen blackmail-worthy things his room contained flashing through his mind.

"Oh you know," Spike said infuriatingly. "The thing."

"What *THING*??" But Spike's attention had already dropped to the bundle under the boy's arm.

"Why Xander, you really *do* love me," he said with a girlish giggle.

Xander sighed, knowing that he wasn't going to get anything else out of the Spike until an opportunity arose for Spike to embarrass him. He sat down on the bed beside Spike and handed him the stack of magazine under his arm.

"Well I figured you need something to do *other* than snoop around my stuff while I'm gone."

"Very thoughtful Xander," Spike said, flipping through the stack of magazines.

"I think I'm going to ransack your crypt and see what naughty things of *yours* I can come up with," Xander grumbled.

"Hmmm, a bunch of bones, a coffin and a busted telly," Spike supplied. "Maybe some abandoned smokes too. If you find some bring them back for me will you?"

"I don't know anything about you that's not in history books," Xander muttered, not sure why that bothered him.

"Well, I'm not a natural blond," Spike laughed as he sifted through the covers. He picked one up and gave Xander a strange look. "Women's Weekly?" he inquired.

The boy laughed. "The cover said there was an article about 'Passions' in it. Besides, if I can get a picture of you reading Women's Weekly then I'll be able to hold off your blackmail."

Spike smirked. "I watch 'Passions', that's blackmail material itself. If the demon population of Sunnydale ever found *that* out I'd be a pile of dust."

"Wow! I know a Spike secret!" Xander exclaimed giddily.

"I'm surprised you even remembered that."

Xander glanced away, "I remember lots of things."

Spike held up another magazine with the same quizzical look. "Vogue?"

"Ummm...I can't really explain that one," Xander chuckled. "I basically just grabbed everything on the shelf that didn't have the word 'teen' and/or 'bop' in the title."

Spike believed it too. The pile on his lap probably contained about 25 magazines. Doing some quick math in his head, the vampire realized that 25 magazines would actually take a significant amount out of the boy's already pitiful weekly salary.

Without warning Spike threw his arm around Xander pulling him close and placed a tender kiss on the boy's temple. "Thanks pet," he murmured.

"No problem," Xander replied in a shaky voice. He really hoped Spike had missed the tremor that had gone through his body when the vampire's soft lips had touched his face. Xander's cheeks burned a bright crimson. Spike smirked. "Gotcha back!"

"Oh yeah, that's right," Xander distantly. "I guess you did."

He suddenly looked at the clock regretfully and started to get up.

"Bloody Hell, what now?" Spike said.

"Scooby gang meeting," Xander explained wearily.

"I take it I'm not invited?"

Xander was a bit surprised by Spike's tone. "You can come if you want," he offered.

"Sounds splendid but no thanks," Spike said, then he added, "did you tell them that I'm here?"

Xander shook his head. "Should I?"

Spike shrugged.

"I won't then," the boy decided. "There's no point really."

Spike nodded his agreement.

"But anyway, I'm already late so I should go."

Spike glanced at the clock. "What time did it start?"

"Seven."

"Uh, Xander...it's seven forty."

"Yeah I know," Xander sighed. "I should still go though."

"Be a pet and wait til eight will you?" Spike asked.

"Why?"

"Cos then the sun'll be down and we can have a merry little stroll together," Spike smirked at Xander's sceptical look. "'Sides, last time I was out some git jumped me for my jacket, couldn't even hit 'im back. Don't fancy that happening again, so you can protect me from the humans and I'll keep the demons from ripping your throat out. How's that sound?"

Although Xander wasn't exactly eager to get to the meeting, he was still confused by Spike's sudden willingness to tag along.

"You actually *want* to come to the meeting with me?" he asked dubiously.

Spike grunted. "Not bloody likely. I want to go to the Bronze and get a drink! It's in the same direction."

Xander nodded. This made more sense. He had to admit that a drink did sound a lot more inviting than an hour listening to Buffy rant about something, and spending an extra twenty minutes flirting (cuddling maybe?) with Spike appealed even more. 'Besides,' he thought to himself, 'I could definitely use some comfort right now.' He flopped back onto the bed. "What should we do until eight?" he asked in a mock-seductive voice.

"Well..." Spike murmured, a leer growing on his face. He slowly moved his mouth towards Xander's. "We could..." the boy's pulse quickened and his muscles tensed. Spike cupped Xander's chin in his hand and felt the boy quiver slightly at his touch. "Read Vogue," Spike finished slapping the magazine into the startled boy's hands and rolling away from him to grab another one.

"That was not nice," Xander growled.

"I know," Spike replied with a huge smile, coming up with a grunge music magazine of some sort. He threw an arm around Xander and pulled him into the now-familiar position. "That's what you get for buying me *Vogue*."

Xander sighed. "You're really not going to get over that anytime soon are you?"

"Not bloody likely."

"Look, there's tons of good stuff in here!" Xander protested, flipping the magazine open. "Scantily clad women galore!"

Spike glanced over with a half-smile. "You should have just bought Playboy. Less embarrassing, less-clad."

Xander raised an eyebrow and looked over at the pile of magazines. "I *swear* there's a Playboy in there somewhere!"

Spike laughed and gave him a squeeze. The boy almost blushed at this small show of affection. He settled his head onto Spike's shoulder and sighed. Spike looked at his dropping eyes.

"Tired already mate?"

"Yeah," Xander said. "I kinda had a bad day."

"Call in sick tomorrow, spend the day with *me*," Spike suggested in a seductive voice. Xander laughed.

"The sick call's not really necessary." Despite the tone of Xander's voice, Spike could feel his muscles tense up as he said the words.

"They sack you?" the vampire asked quietly.

The young man suddenly realized what he had just admitted to the man he'd called an enemy for so long. He hadn't even been going to tell his friends that! To his humiliation, he felt sudden tears spring to his eyes.

Xander nodded, trying hard not to look as miserable as he felt. He refused to make eye- contact and pressed his face into Spike's shoulder waiting for the insult, but it didn't come. He looked up and saw something strange in Spike's eyes. It wasn't pity, it was something else. The vampire ran his fingers through Xander's hair once and then said shakily, "It doesn't matter."

Xander was about to retort that actually it mattered to him *a lot* but stopped. He suddenly realized that Spike knew that and was just trying to console him. Not doing a wonderful job granted, but as a member of the evil undead he probably didn't have much practice.

"It....doesn't, really." Spike continued just as awkwardly. "I mean, *I* know you can make coffee...you could do better than that even!" the vampire stopped short and turned his eyes to Xander and said in a unsure voice, "right?"

Xander almost laughed at Spike's attempt to comfort him. Still, the idea of comforting someone was probably nauseating for a vampire, So what Spike had just tried to do was *huge*. When this hit him, Xander trembled slightly and buried his face in Spike's shoulder, breathing in his scent, almost basking in the moment since he was almost certain there would never be another one. Could this really be happening?

Spike took Xander's actions to be due to how upset he was about his job and hugged him tighter, laying his cheek against the boy's hair.

After a time Spike whispered, "Xander, it's eight."

The boy looked up.

"Are you still going to go to the meeting?" he continued.

"Not *bloody* likely mate," Xander muttered, his eyes still half-closed.

"Think that was Australian pet," Spike chuckled.

Xander sighed, and for the first time in almost a year, his sigh was almost content.

"I guess you'll have to stay longer then," he said and wrapped his arms around the vampire. Spike smiled and mimicked the action and Xander was asleep in minutes.

*****
Part 4:

~And when you looked into my eyes felt a sudden sense of urgency,
Fascination casts a spell and you became more than just a mystery,
And I think about you all the time,
Is this fate is it my destiny?
And I think about you all the t-

With a growl Spike picked up Xander's alarm clock and threw in across the room. It hit the wall with a satisfying crash.

"You're really going to have to stop doing that," came the sleepy voice. "I had enough trouble explaining to my mom why I needed to borrow her clock yesterday, now I have to explain how *it* got broken."

"Well change the sodding radio station next time," Spike grumbled. "I don't fancy waking up to those Australian pouffs every morning!"

"Hey," Xander said getting up, "I happen to like those Australian pouffs!" He started to head for the bathroom.

"Don't go," Spike whined. "I promise I won't insult your precious Savage Garden anymore!"

Xander pointed to the door. "Smell like vampire, must shower. Work, remember?"

"What work?" Spike asked in a quiet voice.

Xander froze mid-step. "Oh yeah," he whispered as he recalled the events of the past day. "I'm....I'm just programmed I guess," he muttered, trying to cover up the idiotic mistake he'd just made. His burning cheeks only added to the misery his loss-of-job caused.

"Come back to bed pet," Spike said. "No point in getting up."

Almost mechanically, Xander obeyed, crawling back into bed. Without thinking about what he was doing, he laid his head on Spike's chest as if they were lovers. A surprised vampire awkwardly put his arms around the boy, not sure what to make of this.

Xander made a small noise. His jaw was clenched, it was obvious he was trying not to cry. Spike was torn. He wanted Xander to feel comfortable around him, to be able to cry in front of him. He wanted to tell the boy that he was safe and loved and that he shouldn't give a flying fuck about the sodding job. At the same time, the idea of how much power a speech like that would give Xander over him was the most terrifying thought imaginable. When he had bared his heart to Dru she'd left. What would Xander do?

Spike snapped himself out of it, reminding himself that right now *he* had the power in this relationship and he intended to keep it that way. He stroked the boy's back until the tremors subsided, then he tilted Xander's head up to face him.

"We're going to get you a job at a blood bank," Spike said decidedly. "One with late hours so we can be on the same schedule." A small dubious smile crept onto Xander's face. "You think I'm kidding?" Spike asked in an amused voice.

"I know you too well to think you're kidding," Xander said. Spike raised an eyebrow.

"You think you do?" he asked.

"Naa," Xander said, slightly embarrassed. "I do know that you like cuddling with male enemies though, so that probably gives me the one-up on a few people."

"True," Spike smirked. "But I'll always have the one-up on you."

"Always?"

"Yep," Spike grinned and Xander actually grinned back.

"So, this blood bank job," Xander said, trying to sound semi-interested. "You want me to have late hours to permit lots of cuddling?"

"That's the plan," Spike leered.

"So what about Anya? She's more of a morning person."

Spike tensed so hard at the mention of Xander's girlfriend that the bed shook slightly.

"One-up," Xander said with a half-smile.

"That was not nice," Spike growled, glaring at him.

"Gotcha back for the magazine thing," the boy replied.

The two suddenly became silent, letting what had just happened sink in. In a few seconds they had both basically just admitted that their current relationship was more than just an uneasy friendship. The insecurity they both felt was suddenly radiating around the room. Xander shifted uncomfortably, not sure if he should remove his head from Spike's chest or if that would give the wrong impression. He shifted again, he felt incredibly uneasy having no idea what the vampire was thinking. Spike suddenly tightened his grip on the boy and Xander breathed a sigh of relief.

"So...." Spike started awkwardly. "Anya, is she....I mean do you..." he broke off, furious at himself for acting like a stammering twelve-year-old. "I mean, how does the demon bitch fit into this?" he finished bluntly.

Xander sat up and looked the vampire straight in the eye. "She doesn't," he said seriously, "so one of you will have to go."

Spike sat up too, his face suddenly transparent. The pain and the insecurity was written plainly across it. This small show of self-doubt from the vampire was enough to make Xander's decision for him. How many people had ever seen Spike this vulnerable? And it was Xander who was causing it! He threw his arms around Spike's neck and hugged him hard. "And it's not going to be you," he growled in the vampire's ear.

Spike held him hard for a minute, slowly getting over the shock and the sudden rush of happiness that overcame him. He laid his head on the boy's shoulder and breathed in deeply, taking in the scent that had intoxicated him for so long. He gently pushed Xander back, cupping the boy's face in both his hands. Then, very slowly and deliberately, his eyes never leaving Xander's, he moved towards him and kissed him deeply.

When their lips finally parted Xander let out a low moan. "I've wanted this for so long," he whispered.

"Me too," Spike said.

They lay down on the bed, still kissing gently. Xander lost track of time, of himself, of the rest of the world and gave himself to Spike's mouth. His dream had finally been realized, and he didn't even dare to think of what was yet to come.

End