Title: Homeward Bound 11/?

Author: Buddy

Pairings: Spike/Xander, Angel/Buffy, Willow/Tara, Giles/Anya, Wesley/Fred.

Rating: NC17

Disclaimer: The characters in this story remain the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, 20^th Century Fox and related production companies. This is purely for entertainment; I make no monies from it.

Summary:…in which Cordelia unleashes her demon and Our Boys get in touch with their wild side.

Beta: All hail Spikevamp for putting up with my continuous additions, amendments, and general dissatisfied fiddling, and for getting up at 5am to correct my errors instead of getting her Saturday morning fix of Buffy The Vampire Slayer.

Authors notes: If Rune hadn’t put evil ideas in my head regarding Spike and underwear, this would have turned out very different! Thanks Runie, for the keen observations and the extra tweaks.

They all sat or stood outside Giles’ hospital room waiting for the doctor to come out and allow them in. Anya was hovering anxiously near the door and was most put out that the doctor hadn’t allowed her to stay in the room whilst she performed tests.

“You do realise they’re not gonna let us all in there don’t you?” Spike said to Xander.

“We’ll just have to take turns. I can wait, I’m just relieved he’s woken up.”

Cordelia uncrossed her legs and slid her hands under her knees. She watched Buffy and Angel from under her eyelashes, propping up the wall opposite her, and forced herself to take in the little touches of reassurance and the love that shone from their eyes. It didn’t help that they both looked so mussed; like they’d obviously rolled out of bed before they dashed over here. It was detail that was painful to acknowledge, but she figured the more she did, the more she would get used to it.

It felt like running a bike over a bruise.

Dawn, Willow and Tara were huddled together in chairs next to her. They looked like refugees from the Little House on The Prairie and Xander grinned at the imagery of them all in bonnets. They looked worn out, and Cordy, Buffy and Anya didn’t look much better. He looked at Spike, who was positively humming with good health and knew he presented the same picture. The irony wasn’t lost on him.

Conversation came from all corners of their group and he tuned it out; no one was talking to him. He slid his arm around Spike’s waist and rested his head on his shoulder for a moment whilst he turned his attention to Buffy and Angel. He blinked hard; for a second he’d expected to see Riley holding her hand, and he realised he’d forgotten to miss him.

He watched Buffy walk over to Anya and touch her shoulder, trying to be reassuring but not really knowing how to pacify her. The door opened and the doctor came out saving her the job. She was a small rotund black woman with frizzy strands of hair trying to escape from a clasp at the nape of her neck. Her glasses were perched on the end of her nose and appeared to be defying gravity.

“Miss Jenkins you may go in now. He’s had a nasty knock and he’s got a hell of a headache but I’m satisfied he’s out of the woods. We do need to keep him in for observation of course.”

“Thank you.” Anya rushed by her and Buffy followed close on her heels.

“How many visitors can he have?” Angel asked her.

She eyed them all warily over the top of her glasses. Spike stared at them fascinated, and wondered why she bothered to even wear them.

“I don’t mind you all going in, but only for a ten minutes. I’ll be back to chase you all out not a minute later.”

They all filed in as silent as church mice. Giles was propped up on thick pillows and he looked over at them with a puzzled expression on his face.

“Do I know you people?”

They all looked at each other worriedly and then at Anya and Buffy.

“I thought that bloody doctor said he was alright!” Spike burst out and Buffy grinned at him.

“She did. He is, he’s just messing with you.”

Spike pulled a face. “Oh very bloody funny. D’you know how long we’ve been out there waiting, wondering if you were gonna be alright?”

“Why Spike, I didn’t know you cared.” Spike’s face twisted in a self-deprecating smirk and he resisted the urge to reach for his smokes.

“How are you feeling Giles’? Apart from the massive bump to your head I mean, because I do remember what that feels like.” Willow’s expression was a mask of misery as she walked over to stand by Buffy at his side. Xander joined Anya across from them.

“My head’s thumping so much I find myself pitying you Spike, for all the times the chip was triggered. Of course when I recover I shall disavow all knowledge that I ever said that.

“You know I could maybe get the people who supply our hardhats at work to sponsor you. How many times is it now Giles?” Xander asked him, wincing at the purple bruise that was spreading out from under his dressing, and the swelling that was closing his eye.

“It’s twenty three times,” Dawn informed them all proudly. “I’ve been keeping track.”

“She also knows how many pints of blood I’ve lost since being Called and how many times Anya has sneezed because of vampire dust,” Buffy informed them sarcastically. Dawn crossed her eyes and stuck out her tongue, but she was relieved to be ridiculed, it meant Buffy felt less worried about Giles.

Anya was holding Giles’ hand tightly in her own and wishing dearly that she could hug him properly without hurting him. Giles realised that at least he didn’t have to make any big announcements about the two of them now, and he was relieved to see that no one looked anything other than happy that he was going to be alright.

He looked across at Angel and they shared a look that no one else noticed besides Tara. She beamed at him and the brilliance of her smile warmed his heart; it was far better than words.

“I just want to go home,” he grimaced, as the pain in his head grew sharp for a few seconds before abating. “I believe I may know who the culprit was by the way. I could point him out in a police line-up. He looked like a student who used to go to Sunnydale High. I don’t think he was in the same year as the four of you.”

“Dirty blonde hair, kinda geeky looking?”

“Actually yes. Do you know him?”

“Andrew Wells. He’s one of the nerd trio that we got the book from in the first place. I’m thinking it’s time for a trip to the slammer.”

“What?”

“I want to talk to Jonathan.”

“What makes you think he’ll tell you anything Buffy? He hasn’t up to now. I’ll call Halfrek, get her to reap some Vengeance upon his pointy little head.”

All eyes turned to her.

“That won’t be necessary, we’ll find him and I’ll kick his ass myself,” Buffy said.

Angel shook his head. “I doubt he’s still here in Sunnydale. We know that Warren was going to give the book to Gavin Park, so it’s my guess that he’s in LA. I’ll call Wesley and get him and the other’s to do some investigating. If Gavin has got his hands on the book it won’t be too long before they have a team of Wolfram and Hart employees searching for Darla and Drusilla.”

Angel looked across at Cordelia and the next sentence died on his lips at the naked look of longing on her face before she looked away. He was bewildered; was she aiming it his way?

Spike gave in and reached for his smokes. Then he realised he didn’t actually smoke any more, or at least he hadn’t since his lungs had started working again. He stuck one in his mouth regardless and leaving it unlit started to pace the room.

“If they haven’t already found them. Besides, how do we know that Dru and Darla aren’t already in the know? Darla was fairly big on the lore when she was in the Master’s Court, stupid bint never shut up about it. And it was The Master who Turned Tiberius. I reckon the only reason she doesn’t already know about him, is because he was such a huge disappointment to the old bastard.

And then, well, you’ve got Dru and the visions haven’t you? She’s probably predicated the whole bloody thing by now and it won’t take Darla long to decipher what she’s going on about.”

Spike ran frustrated hands through his hair, missing the hungry look on Xander‘s face, and the nostalgia on Buffy and Angel‘s at the ‘come hither to bed’ result. Angel’s mind was a whirly-gig of emotion. He looked from Spike to Buffy, and then to Cordelia who caught him open-mouthed when she turned to speak to him.

“I don’t get it Angel, why would Wolfram and Hart show an interest in this? They can’t be worried about the Hellmouth closing, they have bigger apocalypses to fry and they want you around for those.”

“What?”

“Wolfram and Hart, pay attention.” Buffy looked up, startled by Cordelia’s tone. She blinked, maybe she had imagined it; Angel looked flustered but he was speaking again.

“They’re always interested in anything to do with me. They have to keep an eye on their investment.”

“Investment? What do you mean Angel?” Giles asked him.

“As far as they know my place in the upcoming apocalypse is hanging in the balance. They hope to tip the scales so I’m fighting on their side, which was one of the main reasons why they brought Darla back in the first place. If they find out about Buffy and me Bonding I guarantee they will try to intervene. Buffy could be in real danger here.”

“But I don’t … how many apocalypses are there?”

“Giles’ I think you should let us worry about this ok? You need to get some rest, I’m on it.” Buffy smiled her reassurance.

Giles tried to protest but the doctor was in the room and ushering them all out efficiently before he had time to gather his thoughts again.

“Can’t I stay? I need to stay.” Anya looked at her with big appealing eyes and Doctor Forsythe couldn’t resist giving her an indulgent smile.

“I understand Miss Jenkins, but Mr Giles needs his rest. The more rest he gets, the sooner he will be home with you.”

“I am tired Anya, and you should get some rest yourself. Will you stay at Buffy’s house tonight?”

“Why would I do that?” She looked genuinely puzzled.

“So that you are safe. I don’t like the idea of you going back there alone after what happened.”

“Surely you don’t think he’ll come back?”

“No, I don’t suppose that would make any sense would it? Still, I’d feel better knowing that you weren’t alone.”

“Hello, Vengeance demon remember, I can defend my own corner.”

He raised tired eyes to the ceiling and for a heart-stopping moment she saw distaste skate across his features. Was this that defining moment? The part where he told her it was over unless she gave up the day job? That he loved her but couldn’t in clear conscience accept what she was, considering all that he stood for.

She hung her head as she fought for breath. She knew he would do it kindly and she prayed for quickly, so she could turn tail and run. Her bottom lip crumpled, and at first she wasn’t aware of his finger sliding under her chin. He tilted her head up so her gaze was level with his.

“Please Anya, for me. Either that or have someone stay with you. I know you can look after yourself but I have head trauma and it’s making me feel irrational. Indulge me?”

Her eyes flooded with tears of relief and she could barely see as she leaned forward to press a soft kiss to his lips. She nodded when she pulled back.

“I’ll ask Cordelia to come home with me. Two girls with demon aspects should scare ‘em all away without too much trouble; you know, should they return.”

“Thank you.”

Giles tried to nod to emphasise the simple words and winced against the steady throb in his head. Tiredness washed over him in a tidal wave and he was fearful for a second he was going to indulge in a few tears himself. Anya helped him to lie down and clasped his hand one more before she left.

“I’ll be here first thing in the morning. I love you.”

Giles’ eyes were already closing, exhaustion taking over. “I love you too,” he whispered and then he was asleep.

They were all waiting for her expectantly when she came out of the room. Angel’s piercing look irritated her immensely and she wished none of them could see her while she felt so vulnerable and naked.

“What are you looking at?” she snapped at him.

“Anya could you locate Andrew and Warren?”

“Apart from this overwhelming and annoying need to sleep there’s nothing I would like more Angel. Appearing in front of Andrew wearing my other persona and scaring the crap out of him would give me at least some semblance of pleasure, but I can’t.”

“Why not?” Buffy sounded ready for a fight.

“D’Hoffryn revoked my teleporting privileges. The next time I travel that way has to be on matters of vengeance not justice.”

~*~

Faith sat up in bed, wild hair splayed over creamy shoulders, lips plumped and red from kissing and sloe-eyed with satisfaction. She ran her fingers through the black tresses of the head resting on her belly and enjoyed the feeling of post coital languor.

None of it should make sense, yet being here with him made perfect sense somehow. He was interesting, or a nut job, or maybe he was both and the ramifications of her situation aside, it didn’t suck in the get-out-of-jail-free department.

“So Buffy knows about you?”

“They all know I exist yes, but they do not know my identity. They haven’t needed to know that, only that I am an ally.”

“Ok, you have to go through it again. From the top, don’t be shy, with a voice like that you don’t have to worry about boring me.”

“Faith, we have been through this many times.”

“How do I know you’re not making it all up?”

“You know I am not. You know me. You remember me.”

“It’s too weird. Not only are you telling me that Angel and Buffy are going through some demon Slayer transformation gig; you expect me to believe that Xander and Spike already have,” she laughed “Shit sure does happen when my back’s turned, and who would have thought Xander Harris would bat for the other team?”

“Bat for the other team? You are referring to the fact his Bonded is male. That is not important in the greater scheme of things.”

“No you don’t understand it’s not just the fact he’s male, it’s the fact it’s Spike, Xander hates vampires.”

“We all change, look at you.”

“And that’s another thing. How the hell do you know I’m this Helena chick?”

“I have explained this, you are not her exactly. Reincarnation is not an exact repetition of a person’s personality, although you do share her fire and stubborn streak.” He moved so quickly she wondered if she had zoned out for a while because suddenly he was sitting astride her and his lips were pressed to hers. He plundered their depths and then pulled away.

“You have her passion.”

He smiled at her, sending flicks of fire from her nipples to her groin. Sex had always been tantamount to scratching an itch for Faith ... until now. That was one of the reasons her sleeping with Riley after the body switch had freaked her out so much. He had reminded her a lot of Xander, they were both loving men and she hadn’t known what to do with the feelings they had provoked on either occasion. She couldn’t go down that road though, couldn’t dwell on the things she had done to make the Scoobies hate her forever.

And if she had thought the road to redemption was a few blocks around the prison yard she guessed she had been very much mistaken. Because despite what they all might feel for her, it looked as though she had to face them. Not only was her mentor here in Sunnydale, only a few blocks away, if she believed everything she had been told in the last twelve hours, she could help him as much as he could her.

“Tiberius ... Your name doesn’t ring any bells. Should it? Shouldn’t I remember something other the way you make me feel when you touch me? Why haven’t I had prophetic dreams? Come to think of it, how come I never heard of this Helena before? You’d think I would have, her being so special.”

“The Council hid the truth of her story very well. They would probably have succeeded for longer had I not survived. I did not want to, until the Powers That Be granted me some insight into my future for a change … I knew if I could hold on long enough I would find you.”

Faith bit back the sarcastic retort that sprang readily to her lips. She hated flowery speeches and this one wasn’t much of an exception apart from the way it made her feel when he said it. It didn’t sound like the usual drivel from the latest smooth talking redneck she’d ran into. She discounted the words and felt their meaning instead, and as much as she hated it, she couldn’t argue, it felt real.

“Perhaps you’re a magician and clever with the mind games.”

“Perhaps I am. You are free to leave here any time you wish. Or you could stay and make love with me until the time is right to go to your compatriots and let them help you decide if I’m trustworthy.”

“Aren’t you in the least bit worried about the law?” Faith raised her eyebrows at him but closed her eyes when he slid his thumbs over her nipples.

“The law is a mere irritation in this case. It does not accommodate or hinder my mission.” His lips dropped to her throat where he mouthed her warm skin and he rolled hardened pebbles between forefinger and thumb.

“I’ll be sure to remind you of that … when …they catch up with me.”

Tiberius buried his face between her breasts and licked at the natural cleavage. He captured first one and then the other nipple, biting hard, tempted to draw blood. Faith’s pussy flooded, fresh juices to mingle with her own ejaculate and his spent come. She flipped them over and straddled him, sinking down on his thick hard penis for the second time.

Tiberius clasped her hips and tossed her on her back, sinking straight back into her without pause.

“Sometimes you have to be the passenger Faith, and let me take you along for the ride.”

~*~

Angel, Cordelia and Anya sat on the sofa in Giles’ living room whilst Buffy swept up the rest of the glass fragments on the carpet. The three seated were drinking coffee and there was so much tension in the room that Anya thought she was going to collapse under the pressure. It intruded on her worry and made her stomach hurt and she couldn’t wait for Angel and Buffy to leave.

“Andrew was actually trying to steal a photograph of Dawn and me, ugh!“ Buffy gave an exaggerated shiver. “And then he used it to bash Giles over the head. My life is so disturbing.”

“Sure Buffy, Giles is in the hospital with head trauma, but we hear your pain,” Cordelia interjected smoothly, earning a startled look.

Buffy felt the blush heating her cheeks, and a spark of irritation lit through her exhaustion.

“So I’m human and imperfect, sue me.”

Angel’s eyes kept drifting over to Cordelia’s face for evidence that he had imagined she had ever looked at him as anything other than a friend. He looked at her, really looked at her for the first time in a long time and realised that her face looked thinner and her eyes looked haunted. She caught him watching her and averted her eyes. Oh god, the humiliation, if she could just get her body to move she could at least leave the room. Except this was Giles’ new home and she had no idea where to go.

“You could have left that Buffy. I would have done it,” Anya said unaware for the moment of Cordelia’s added distress.

“I want to help. Anya how long have you and Giles …”

“What? Been in love. Do you find that hard to believe, that he could love me?”

“Anya, no … that’s not what I meant. I meant I wish you had both felt you could have told us.”

“Giles didn’t want to blur the lines for you, though I guess that’s a moot point now when you consider that at least three of you either have or are willing to trade certain things for demon parts.”

“True, but we’re not into the Vengeance gig Anya, we’re doing it to save the world,” Buffy said in an indignant voice.

“Oh bullshit, you’re doing it for hot sweaty sex and orgasms with the undead, at least two of you are, Cordelia‘s simply pining away. And it isn‘t so long ago that you were happy to have the power of The Wish wielded for your own benefit.”

“That was by default, I didn’t know that …”

Cordelia gasped at Anya’s words, she stumbled to her feet and made her way quickly to the front door.

“Cordy wait, where are you going?” Angel shouted after her, the sinking feeling in his stomach increasing when the truth of his suspicions were confirmed.

Buffy stared. “Did I just miss something because I have no idea what just happened?”

“Oh god! Cordelia I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to say anything, I’m just tired and extremely irritable and I’m worried sick about Giles’ and I’m fed up of being a Vengeance demon. I haven’t done any vengeance for weeks, if your still wondering.”

“Great Anya, I’m happy that at least you didn’t spill my secrets in a vengeful way.”

Angel got to the door before Cordelia could open it. “Don’t Cordy, don’t leave, not like this.”

“Angel? What’s wrong with her.” Suddenly Anya’s words replayed in Buffy’s mind and the penny dropped.

“Oh.”

“Angel step away from the door,” Cordelia said in a tone that wouldn’t have been out of place from her three years earlier.

Angel winced, her voice sounded grating and somehow it was all his fault.

“Cordelia please.”

Cordelia started to cry. “I have to go,” she said, “let me out the door.”

“I’m so sorry, I had no idea that you felt that way. I want to help …”

“What exactly do you think you can do Angel? You save souls you don’t mend broken hearts.”

Anya and Buffy hovered anxiously nearby, neither of them sure what to do, both their minds in turmoil. Anya mentally kicked herself and Buffy was still trying to digest the information that Cordelia was in love with Angel. Angel. The one thing that had made her separation from Angel even more unbearable had been the insidious notion that one day they would find a way to anchor his soul and that he would choose Cordelia instead of her. Cordelia was the woman who could fight with him and help him seek his redemption. The one who was allowed to be there.

Buffy quelled the unnecessary jealousy that threatened to flood her brain and fought to stay rational. Now that she was actually faced with how Cordelia felt she felt a measure of indescribable relief. She knew that Angel loved only her and she actually felt really bad for Cordelia. She opened her mouth to tell Angel to leave her alone and let her go, but she was too late.

“I just wish I’d never ran into you again.”

“Cordelia!” Anya looked stricken. The air around them started to thicken and in a showy flash of light D’Hoffryn appeared.

“Here it is Anyanka, your last chance to prove yourself or accept the consequences.”

Buffy moved in front of him ready to start punching but he pushed her out of the way like she was a rag doll. Anya felt the tears threaten again and bit her bottom lip hard. Angel helped Buffy to her feet and Cordelia watched silently at the events unfolding and an eerie calmness settled over her.

Anya looked at D‘Hoffryn in resignation.

“I expect LA would have been a very different place if they hadn’t run into each other. I strongly suspect that one or both of them might not even be around. Am I right?“

“Now Anyanka, all you have to do is your job and then we shall see,” he folded his arms across his chest and waited. She stared at him pain evident on her face.

“Come now child, you chose this remember? How can you continue to give your fealty to these mortals when all they ever do is hurt you?”

Anya hung her head. Here was her chance, to put it all right and take her stand. She looked up at Buffy, Angel and Cordelia. At least they would all know she loved them, but most importantly, they would know that she respected herself enough to do what she should. She would rather die than renounce her love of humanity again. She took a deep breath.

“I can’t do it D’Hoffryn ok? You’ll just have to do your worst, I prefer being human and I’m fed up of hurting people,” she turned to Buffy. “Tell Giles I love him. I can’t do this; I can’t hurt Angel, or any of you. Tell Xander I loved him too, really loved him and I’m happy he’s happy with Spike. Say goodbye to Spike for me and …”

“Anya, don’t you think you’ve said enough already?” Cordelia walked assuredly over to D’Hoffryn and he looked in surprise as she placed her hands on his shoulders.

“What do you think you’re doing?“ he said arrogantly.

He tried to push her away but all of his supernatural strength drained away at Cordelia’s touch. White light emanated from her and enveloped the two of them. D’Hoffryn gasped and Anya’s pendant lit up with a green glow before winking out and falling to the floor, the clasp broken.

D’Hoffryn shrank in height and stature, his horns curled over and then disappeared and his skin followed the whole range of the colour spectrum before finally settling on a gorgeous shade of brown, not dissimilar to Gunn’s. Cordelia dropped her hands and Angel caught her before she could fall backwards.

Everyone stared, and for a moment it was like an absurd Mexican standoff. Until D’Hoffryn raised his hand with a bewildered expression that only cleared when he looked at Anya.

“Anyanka, I seem to have lost my way. Can you tell me why we’re here and who these people are?”

Anya stared at him. “I didn’t know. That you used to be human, I thought you were always one of the Lower Beings.”

“What are you talking about child? Of course I’m human. What’s a Lower Being?”

“You don’t remember? What about all of your time in Arashmaha?”

“Cordelia, what did you do?” Buffy demanded.

“She glowed Buffy, did you not see it? It was very pretty.” Anya rushed over to Cordelia and hugged her hard. “Thank you, I don’t know how you did it but thank you. D’Hoffryn would have destroyed me this time, I was on probation.”

Cordelia looked at Angel over Anya’s shoulder. “Check out demon me.” She smiled at him and Angel wondered how he had missed it before now. The love that shone from her face was almost as bright as the glow that had just emanated from her and he had been too wrapped up in himself to notice it.

“What happened to him Cordelia?” he asked her, and wondered if he would ever be able to apply his ability to pick up important nuance from the bad guys, to those people he loved.

“I burned the vengeance right out of him, I’m thinking there’s going to be a line of ex-Vengeance demons on the lookout for a job.”

Buffy grinned at her. “Well that works out well for us then doesn’t it? I wonder how they feel about the apocalypse?” Her face softened with empathy at the site of Cordelia’s tearstained face and she wished she knew what to do to make it better for her. “Will you be ok?”

Cordelia looked from Buffy to Angel. He looked at her with such compassion that she thought her heart would finally shatter. Miraculously it didn’t and she wanted to smile just a little at the fact that despite the drama of her emotions, her heart still kept beating and she was still breathing. She couldn’t stop fresh tears though, but she smiled through them. She closed the distance between herself and Angel and hugged him.

“I’m so glad you’re alright. I didn’t think before I spoke, but then that’s not so new is it?“ Her mouth twisted in a sad smile. “So. Everybody knows that I’m in love with you …”

“Cordelia …”

“No don’t say anything, let me finish. I’m going to be ok. Just give me some time, and I will be ok. You’re happy and that helps, and it’s with Buffy. Well, duh! I always knew if you found a way to be together nothing would stop you. I am happy for you and eventually I’ll be happy for me. I now have new and interesting facets that can be used to do good. I did good here tonight right?”

“You did good,” Angel said and smiled at her.

“I hate to break up this beautiful moment,” Anya said. “But what are we going to do with him? He can‘t stay here, I wonder if Halfrek would take him in; she lives alone, and it’s not as though she’s going to be busy from now on.”

“I’m curious Cordy. If you burned the vengeance out of him, how come he’s not dead?”

D’Hoffryn sat down and looked around the room as though he thought he was having a strange dream from which he would awaken if he concentrated hard enough.

“I don’t know, maybe he wasn’t bad to the bone.” Anya shook her head at that.

“Oh he was. And he will remember everything given time. This is his punishment for allowing someone to best him. To live the life of a human being, and he’ll find that for the first two years at least it really sucks.

I wouldn’t plan on having a party just yet either, only D’Hoffryn’s Vengeance demons will have been released. There are still the other Lower Beings to consider, you can’t wipe them all out that simply, it would tip the scales too severely on a cosmological level.”

Buffy looked at her, not willing yet to give up the possibility they might have some back-up when they needed it. “How many Vengeance demons did he have?”

“Oh about a hundred, give or take.”

“Will there be repercussions from this? Will the other Lower Beings want to take revenge for what they’ve lost?”

“I doubt it Buffy. They might offer Cordelia a job for what she did to him, but they’re not going to shed any tears over this. There’s a lot of jealousy among the Lower Beings, it’s a competition thing; D’Hoffryn’s girls were always the most successful.”

“Ok, tell us where Halfrek lives when she’s in Sunnydale. We’ll drop him off and they can console each other. Ready Angel? I can’t believe I have to work tomorrow and pull in so many other things. I guess I’m going to be doing the delegating thing.”

Angel looked at her worriedly. “I’m not working in the Magic Box alone.”

“You won’t have to, I thought perhaps Cordelia might helps us out.” She looked at Cordelia. “We’d come in with you and show you the ropes and we’d be around, just making plans and doing the research thing. I want to try and get a pass to go and see Jonathan at some point tomorrow. What do you reckon, you up for it?”

~*~

“Are you sure about this Love? Maybe we should wait until after our search for Dru and Darla; there’s no point in my starting work there and then having to go off on a hunt that could take days, your boss will just think I’m unreliable.”

“That won’t be a problem, you can sign on as casual labour.”

“Yeah, but won’t it look odd when we’re both absent at the same time?”

Xander sighed heavily and ran his hands through his hair in frustration. Perhaps if he took the scissors to it himself he might feel better.

“Spike if you don’t want to do it just say so,” he snapped and garnered a raise eyebrow for his tone.

“What’s wrong Xander?”

Xander threaded his fingers with Spike’s, hoping the action would calm him and take the sting out of his sharp retort.

“I dunno … I woke up in a bad mood I guess. We have Giles in the hospital and Anya’s now a frustrated Vengeance demon. Warren and Andrew are almost certainly cooking up some nefarious plan that involves those creeps at Wolfram and Hart and Cordelia’s heart is breaking all over the place.

On top of that, we not only have to go find Drusilla and Darla but we have to help Buffy and Angel fight to close the Hellmouth and stop the next impending apocalypse. Not that we don’t have plenty of experience with that last part, but I figured for once we should just skip town before the other things that are wigging me out stoke the panic into overdrive.”

Spike covered Xander’s body with his own and slid his morning erection softly against his.

“You and I both know you wouldn’t do that. How about you let me ease the tension for you?”

Xander looked into Spike’s dilating pupils and tried to hold onto his irritation. He succeeded for all of ten seconds, until Spike’s mouthed tilted at the corners and melted his resolve. He parted his lips in invitation, his tongue meeting the welcome intrusion of his lover’s. Spike battled happily for dominance for a while, before sliding the flat of his tongue across the back of Xander’s canines, and growling in satisfaction when his teeth elongated. He deliberately sliced his tongue across the jagged edge and spread blood all around the cavern of Xander’s mouth.

He pulled away slightly, lips still hovering, his eyes glittering a different golden shade to Xander’s but looking no less predatory.

“I want you on your knees Gorgeous.”

“Only if you promise to fuck me blind.”

“Oh I intend to fuck you Spike, and you’ve given me an idea.”

Xander rolled Spike off of him and jumped up and went into the lounge room. When he came back he was holding one of Cordelia’s scarves. Spike grinned at him.

“Bondage fun Pet?”

“Not what I had in mind Blondie, but there’s always next time.”

“Love, that’s a girlie accessory, and despite my open-minded approach to all things to do with sex, I‘m not cross-dressing for you.”

Xander’s features morphed back to human as he stalked towards the bed and in an unconscious imitation he flashed Spike a satisfied leer.

“You would. If I wanted you to. Besides women‘s clothing can be so much more interesting to get into.” He knelt either side of him and looked down at him hungrily whilst he folded the scarf. “This is about sensory deprivation and the power of suggestion. Shake your demon off, I want you nice and smooth for this.”

“What’s suddenly so wrong with having demon in me?” Spike asked as his features returned to normal.

“I’m not going to dignify that with an answer, especially as the only things springing to mind are double entendres. Lift up, that’s it, it needs to be tied properly so you can’t see any light shining through it. Now, you’re wearing a skirt …”

“Xander!”

“Go with this, you’ll like it I promise. The skirt’s a long fitted number with a split up the left leg ending about six inches below your hip. It needs to be that long to cover the garter belt you’re wearing and your stocking tops.”

Spike suddenly felt warmth breath across his lips and he could hear Xander’s heartbeat gradually speed up as he hovered over him.

“Your panties are nothing but a scrap of gossamer and lace, a pretty white wrapping for the present underneath,” his voice was low and husky.

Spike’s erection hardened despite his earlier protestations. He remembered trying on a thong of Drusilla’s one time, right after she had discovered them, just to see what it would feel like. It had felt nice and Dru had been delighted.

“Can I at least be bra-less?” He asked him weakly.

“No, it’s a matching set and I can see the lace through the transparency of your blouse,” Xander breathed the words softly across Spike’s mouth his thumbs ghosting briefly across his hardening nipples.

His thumbs were replaced with the tip of his tongue, flicking one and then the other and then circling the areolas, reading the little bumps as though they were an ancient, long forgotten language. He moved down his chest with open mouth kisses and Spike felt saliva soaking through fabric and precum oozing from his cock, as he got lost in the fantasy.

“I’m going to unwrap you now, you’re all mine.”

Xander knelt at the side of him and slid one hand up the front of his left leg, stopping halfway between his knee and his thigh and brushing fingers across an imaginary stocking top. Spike could see the delicate lace contrasting sharply with the masculinity of Xander’s work-worn hands and tensing his thigh muscle pressed it closer to his touch. The patch of flesh above ached, suddenly more sensitive, and for a moment he could feel the lace covered elastic that parted his thigh dead centre, and he desperately needed Xander to unhook it.

Xander traversed the area with his tongue, leaving saliva trails to follow with nips and fang tips, until blood was flowing freely. The sharp twang assaulted Spike’s nostrils and he had to bite his inner cheek to stop himself from coming when Xander started to lap at the spills.

Fingers travelling upwards, disappearing under skirt material and pushing aside the scrap of cloth that covered his straining penis. Then he was in Xander’s hand, gripped firmly whilst he wanked him and nuzzled his balls. He groaned in pleasure as Xander took him in his mouth, teasing his crown with the flat of his tongue and plundering his slit with the tip. Xander hoovered him, sucking in his cheeks and letting his tongue slid up and down his length every time he moved.

All the imagery in Spike’s mind coalesced into startling surrealism, rich, glossy brown hair, bloody lips, nylon and lace, and he shot his load into the back of Xander’s throat with a triumphant yell. A few minutes of silence interrupted only by the pounding of his heart and then slick fingers were breaching his hole. They slid in with no resistance and he whimpered as Xander stroked across his prostate.

Xander withdrew them and rolled Spike onto his side and then he was being filled as Xander entered him from behind.

“So hot baby, so pretty. I’m gonna fuck you hard Spike, I want to hear you come again.”

Xander held his shoulder as he thrust into him mercilessly, pinning him closer to him when he reached round for his cock. A few teasing strokes and Spike was hard again, trying to thrust back against him but unable to manoeuvre in the confines of his embrace. Xander kissed the back of his neck and nipped hard across his shoulders

Xander snarled as he felt his climax building. Ridges appeared, eating up the smooth surface of his brow and he dropped his lids over golden irises the moment his fangs slid into the side of Spike’s throat. This did it for him every time, the feeling of being connected through blood and sex, fangs and cock and he only wished for one more thing and there it was, Spike gushing hot and thick over his hand. Xander roared as he came, pulling his fangs from Spike’s neck in a knee jerk reaction when his orgasm crashed through him.

A sharp sting at his wrist and then Spike’s jaw was working as he pulled blood from Xander’s veins. Xander lay content, basking in the afterglow and the pleasure as his lover fed from him.

They lay cuddled in the same position for a while, Xander running his fingers lazily through Spike’s hair, dropping kisses onto his shoulder and his sensitive spot behind his ear. Then the alarm beeped and Xander thought he might just hit the snooze button and give work a miss.

“I know what you’re thinking Love and I will come with you, so no bunking off. We may as well make the most of it whilst we have the opportunity. As soon as me or Angel get a lead on Dru and Darla’s whereabouts, we could both be unemployed.”

“Real life is getting too complicated Spike.”

“Only just getting complicated?”

“It was easier in the beginning, it was just us. I want to go back to that five weeks we had before anyone knew about us.”

“No you don’t, you like having the perks that you enjoy now. Besides, now we don’t have to hide and that’s much more fun. Come on, we need some breakfast before we go, and don’t shower alright, I want to be able to smell my scent on you.”

Spike smirked, knowing that Xander’s eyebrows were raised.

“Alright, I’m being a bit territorial, sue me.”

“No, I like it. Spike?”

“Yes Love?”

“Thanks for easing my tension.”

~*~

Buffy gasped as the blood flowed into her mouth, images of Angelus with Drusilla, Darla, Spike and faces she didn’t recognise. Echoes of the people he loved now, both here and in Los Angeles. Then pain, heartache, cunning, happiness at things that shouldn’t make a sane person content at all and … so-much-desolation. Love and loss so huge she thought it was going to tear her breath away, memories of herself, first love and goodbye. Grief, unbearable, second chances and then Angel in the sunlight with his heart beating, kissing her, crushing her to him and then goodbye again.

She tried to pull back and let out a sob. Angel retracted his fangs and gathered her to him. He knew. Knew exactly what the matter was because he’d felt it all too.

“Why didn’t you tell me? You knew.”

“It was the price I had to pay. I had to give back my mortal life so you didn’t have to Buffy, and I’d do it again.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Tears streamed down her face and she pushed him off and scrambled away from him. Angel hung his head.

“What was the point, they took the day back, created a time loop. Only I knew, it was my burden, why fill your heart with what could have been? It’s not important now. We can have all that they took from us before and more because we get to live longer this way.”

He pulled her back and stroked the back of her head. And she let him, because she needed the comfort and wanted to comfort him, because he’d lived with this alone and it was unbearable.

“What happened?”

“Mohra demon. I got its blood on me in a fight and they have rejuvenating powers.”

“You were really human?” Angel nodded. “How did we spend it, the time?”

Angel smiled at her sadly. “We had a good day. Except for the incredible pain from the beatings, a definite downside to being human.” He kissed the top of her head. “We made love, and we laughed and …”

“Peanut butter.”

“Huh?”

“Peanut butter and chocolate and …”

“Cookie dough fudge mint ice-cream.”

“Not enough time, there’s not enough time.” Buffy’s eyes filled with tears and she clung to Angel’s chest. “I told you I would never forget, but I did.” She started to cry then, big whooping sobs that were as painful as they were cathartic . Angel held her tight and rocked her; there was nothing else he could do.

~*~

The crew hadn’t really taken a lot of notice when Xander had arrived at work with Spike that morning; Cromwell had given them a wink and a leer and Spike would have sworn under oath, had it counted, that Dwight had given him an odd look, as though he found it strange for Spike to be out in daylight. Yeah, he was probably being paranoid, but he had read somewhere that paranoia was perfect awareness.

Both of them had managed to put in a productive couple of hours work, which in Xander’s case had meant a lot of arm-waving and pen-pushing and for Spike had been mostly grunt work. The most rewarding part for them had been performed about an hour ago when Spike had fucked Xander into a barely dry, freshly painted wall.

Xander had come so hard he’d banged his head and afterwards they’d had to retouch the paint to cover the stain of mingled ejaculate, sweat and fingerprints, grinning like loons whilst they did so. Spike grinned again; he loved fucking his Boy. He loved his Boy.

He could certainly get used to this, not having to wait at home all day, neither separated by time or daylight and the opportunities for shagging were a definite bonus. The thought of Xander walking around now with Spike’s spent seed still inside him made his cock twitch uncomfortably in his jeans and almost took his mind of the other thing that was threatening to cloud his otherwise perfect day.

He rubbed his neck and sniffed hard, distracted now he had let the thought in; how much longer did they have here? It was clear to him their days of normality were numbered. He laughed out loud at that. It wasn’t as if they shared the normality enjoyed by others on a daily basis.

Spike lifted his hardhat back and scratched his forehead; he wasn’t sweating much because it wasn’t really exerting him, but the bloody thing was making him itch because it was making his head hot. It was strange to be able to regulate his own body temperature and not have to steal warmth from his environment. He put it back and lifted the next girder. Lifting girders was something he normally did when a building collapsed on him during an earthquake, or the latest uber nasty wrought havoc and mayhem, not like this, putting in a days work.

The truth was he didn’t feel the same way as he used to, he didn’t need to kill for food or rely on packets of animal blood any longer, in fact the joy he got from it nowadays was the very fact that the source for his sustenance was his lover. His Bonded.

His lust for violence had altered too. It was more selective; he would kill anyone and anything that threatened or endangered any of his own - funny how they’d all become such a part of the package - but he no longer craved it …except as foreplay. He didn’t especially mind this change of feeling, he’d made his choice and the way he felt about Xander filled him completely.

Which was why he was so fucking terrified.

He’d never felt so complete in his life; the two of them shared species. Admittedly he’d experienced it twice before, but humans and vampires crawled out of the woodwork from every which way, and it had never felt like this not even with Angelus. He had so much to lose, yeah all right they all did, but none of them deserved to the way he did.

What had he ever done to make up for a past of unspeakable evil? Had he done any less than Angel? Well yeah, come to think of it he had and the majority of what he had done hadn’t been in the sake of atonement or altruism. Any regret he felt for his past was remote; that was who he was then and he had simply followed his nature. He’d rarely gone out of his way to help anybody who wasn’t a member of the soddin’ Scooby Gang and it was only after he had fallen in love that he’d started to do so at all.

Even when he’d helped them to defeat Glory and he’d stayed by Dawn’s side after Buffy died he’d done it for love and not redemption. Helping to save the world was just a happy unlife-saving bonus.

So now he was waiting for the pay-off. He knew what the written prophecies said about the way it was meant to go down and he could remember Lorne’s reading almost word perfect. But he also knew that prophecies could be very funny things and despite predictions from Ancient vampires or whatever the bloody hell he was when he wrote the Manifesto, there was a fighting chance Tiberius might be just as wrong as Nostradamus.

Darla was a mastermind when it came to something she wanted. And she would rise to this occasion with her usual flair and they’d all be damn lucky if they even made it to the front line. And Dru, well she was a law unto herself, and she would relish the chance to defeat Angel - the soul who took her Daddy.

What would they make of the two of them now? Darla would be cynical he guessed and she would be hurt that Angel was with Buffy, which made her more dangerous. He suspected Drusilla might approve of them through riddles and insane babble; on some level she would understand Spike’s love for Xander, but he doubted that would stop her.

He lifted his umpteenth girder and he could see Xander peering into the shadows as he looked for him and smiling over, his eyes following to him to his destination. Xander was joking with his crew, running his department smoothly and efficiently, and Spike could see how well respected he was, simply because of who he was. A stellar guy. Not perfect, he could get into a snit that made Angelus look like an amateur and he could be as selfish as anyone of them. Usually he wasn’t though and he cared about the things that were right.

Would Spike have to pay for his sins when to make him do so would punish Xander too? The Powers That Be seemed to be right bastards who wouldn’t balk at stepping over a few choice bodies to get to their pound of flesh.

With Drusilla and Darla in the mix he wagered there was a good chance they could be grabbing it in quivering handfuls.

~*~

Fleur Se`lu looked at Faith coolly. Her demeanour belied the pride she felt for her part in bringing her to this juncture. She had been there with Tiberius, watching in the shadows when she was Called and had been instrumental in buying her enough time to escape from Boston to get away from Kakistos. Not that Faith knew any of that, and she strongly suspected Tiberius hadn’t been willing to spill all of his beans just yet.

She winced at the unpleasant memory of watching Faith immerse herself in darkness , not only because it had almost been the undoing of Tiberius, but also because Fleur had hated to see all her passion spent for the wrong cause. All because she had felt alone, that she hadn’t belonged, and even as she had lain in a coma they hadn’t been allowed to intervene.

Now she had turned it around, held her hands up, accepted the consequences of her actions and chosen the path of redemption. Which unfortunately was never a simple journey and there were still stumbling blocks in her way. Nothing was certain; even Tiberius had to concede that.

Fleur watched her move around the large dining room, touching objects of art and admiring them simply because they were exquisite and not because she had a collector’s appreciation for them. She liked to watch her move, she had a predatory grace that reminded her of herself and possessed unbridled sexual energy that almost tempted her to make a concession in her sexual preferences. She didn’t think Faith would be unwilling but Tiberius would not be amused.

“I suspect you might have Nymph blood running through your veins.”

“Been spying on us have you?” Faith said, and gave her the once over. Fleur she knew she had startled her and admired her quick recovery.

“It must feel very strange to find out you were someone else.”

“Yeah wicked, who the hell are you, my shrink?”

“I’m Fleur S`elu.” She raised her chin as she spoke, and for a moment and unbeknownst to Faith, she resembled the Slayer who’s demise had activated her Calling. Faith relaxed visibly.

“Proud chickie ain’tcha Fleur. What happened to your throat?”

Fleur’s hand automatically covered the fingerprints that Buffy had left around her neck.

“Let’s just say I got on the wrong side of your sister.”

“Sister? I don’t have a sis …” Faith grinned. “You pissed Buffy off huh? So Fleur, you part of this whole set up?”

“I have been in Tiberius’ company for a long time. Keeping him sane, helping him to find others who might help in some way, even if they couldn’t join his quest.”

“His quest being to help Buffy and Angel close the Hellmouth?”

“Among other things yes. He daren’t believe he would ever find you. He thought you might be a false promise, but it was the only spark of hope he had to keep him going. That and his desire to fulfil his promise to Helena, to help the last Slayer.”

“Technically, I’m the damn Slayer.”

“Technically.” Fleur raised a mocking eyebrow.

“Well I’m thinking that if Buffy’s going to develop a bloodlust any time soon, I’ll actually be the only.”

Fleur’s eyes widened, it was as she’d suspected.

“Tiberius hasn’t told you?”

“That is enough Fleur. You may leave us.”

Tiberius strode into the room and tried to dismiss Fleur with an irritated glance. She stood her ground and waited for the inevitable smoothing of his frown; he rarely stayed angry with her for long, not even when she was on occasion … indiscreet.

”Where’s Treysor and Selphi?” She asked him.

“As a matter of fact they have just this minute returned from their scouting trip. They are in the main office with Jamie. Watch yourself around her, she has ran out of medication and she fights the bloodlust unaided.”

“My blood is of no use to her, and I’m a match for any violent outbursts. But really Tiberius, are the stakes not high enough for you? How could you let this happen?”

“It is a temporary glitch …”

“Well if you will insist on hiring vampires.”

“Only one, and she has such promise.”

“Excuse me for interrupting this riveting conversation, I must have nodded off for a minute and had a scary dream because otherwise I’d have to believe that you have a vampire around the place.” Faith looked at them both like she suspected their mental illness might be catching.

Fleur flashed her an understanding smile. “My darling, you don’t know the half of it, and I doubt you will like any of it when you do.”

Faith stared at the look of compassion Fleur threw her way before she left the room in a cloud of pheromones and perfume.

“What the hell is she? I bet I‘m the only human being in this place, and you know what? Suddenly jail doesn‘t seem so bad!”

Faith wondered how easy it would be to leave. Tiberius had told her she was free to go but maybe it was a lie. While she’d showered and dressed, doubts about her own sanity had started to creep in. True she had done some stupid, criminal things in her short life, but she hadn’t ever trusted anyone this implicitly, this quickly. Not with her feelings, her heart. She was beginning to think it had been a big mistake. Tiberius started to walk towards her and Faith raised her hands to ward him off.

“No mister, you stay right where you are. You’re not sexing your way out of this. What is she?” Tiberius slowed down but he didn’t stop until he was standing in Faith’s personal space.

“She’s an Elemental, a Wood Nymph.”

“So, you have a Wood Nymph and a vampire,” she shrugged her shoulders, her hands in the air “Why a vampire?”

“Jamie has never been comfortable with her nature, her mind struggles against her body‘s needs. I found her and offered her an alternative.” Tiberius raised his hand slowly and pushed Faith’s hair out of her face.

“You look more comfortable when you are not wearing prison clothes. You look even more comfortable when you are not wearing anything at all.”

“Stop it. Don’t change the subject. If she’s not down with feeding from, and killing humans why does she need medication?”

“Sometimes the bloodlust can take over, the pills help to take the edge of it, make it manageable. She feeds from pig’s blood.”

“Great, we should market them and feed them in truck loads to vamps everywhere, then Buffy and me can retire to Disney World.”

“You are missing the point Faith. Jamie wants to defy her nature, I only know of one other who felt this way without the benefit of a soul, but then I was loved.”

“What about Spike, you said …”

“I said he fell in love, he was steeped in humanity. I don’t believe he ever willingly defied his nature. Now it is his nature no longer.”

She looked up at him and he was trembling. She shook her head, she didn’t know what to believe any more. If she could be more sure of her welcome, she would go to Buffy’s and talk to her and Angel right now, before the hold Tiberius had on her threatened to take over her common sense again. But the truth was she didn’t really want to, she was just afraid of what exactly staying might mean.

Tiberius had known this was going to be hard, if not impossible, but he trusted in the love that he had shared with Helena and simply had to believe it would be enough. He’d waited over three hundred years for this, he could wait a little longer.

~*~

Xander enjoyed the lull in the madness that was work and sat back with his feet propped up on his desk. His hands were clasped behind his head and he closed his eyes momentarily. It was a game he liked to play, to catch himself unaware with who or what would pop into his head. It wasn’t always Spike surprisingly enough, at least to him, but this time he could immediately see the shock of blonde hair, startling blues eyes and a smile that could turn his heart to goop in a second.

His cock twitched pleasantly as he relived their recent love making and the familiar ache started in his chest because Spike wasn’t within touching distance. At least he could see him, even if it was only in his head. He laughed out loud when it occurred to him that it was their inability to be near each other for any length of time, and not get down with the hot monkey sex that would lose him his job in the end, not having to take time out to search for the Dangerous Sisters.

Where was he? Xander felt hunger gnawing deep inside his belly and thought that if Spike didn’t hurry up, he would start on the deli-packed goodies without him. One of these fine days they should really go shopping, perhaps they should swing by the supermarket on the way home. Or perhaps they could just go home and he could tie Spike up and fuck him till he bled. His hand drifted downwards and he stroked his growing erection softly through the cloth of his trousers.

He heard footsteps crunching the dirt on the pathway to his cabin and he knew it wasn’t Spike. He swallowed his disappointment and decided to just go look for him when he’d gotten rid of whoever it was.

He opened his eyes expectantly and swung his legs of the desk, grateful that his shirt covered wood. His stomach growled violently and he flashed Dwight a sheepish grin.

“Harris, can I talk to you for a minute?”

“Sure Dwight, what’s on your mind?“

“Sunnydale actually.”

“That’s a heavy weight to be carrying all by yourself.” He grinned at him and motioned for him to sit down. “I’m probably going to regret this aren’t I?” Xander looked at him and the grin faltered when he saw Dwight’s expression.

“Ok, what’s wrong?”

“Well, it’s not Sunnydale per se, though that‘s the reason I guess.” Xander closed his eyes and his hands into fists, surrealism threatening to take his happy thoughts to bad places.

“Ok, why don’t we start at the beginning? Sunnydale’s not working out for you any more?” He reached over for the brown bag that contained his and Spike’s lunch and rifled through it for a sandwich.

“Hell, Sunnydale’s not the kind of town that works for anyone is it? Unless you’re a vampire, and only then if you don’t run into Buffy. I’m right aren’t I? I remember when she saved the guys from those ugly fuck-off demons that everyone denied seeing straight after. I know most folk act like ostriches around here, and most of the time I’d be happy to bury my head in the sand right along side of ‘em, and I’m ashamed to admit I did that day, her losing the job and everything, but I can‘t do that any more.”

“You mean you know about …”

“This town’s true face, yeah, I really do.”

Xander could smell fear and excitement coming off him in stinky waves and despite the fact the news he was going to give him could only be bad, he could tell the excitement was really stoking his fire.

“Did you run into a vampire?”

“No, well yeah, I’ve seen my fair share, and I saw you and Buffy dusting a couple at the back of The Bronze one time, but that’s not it.” He leaned forward conspiratally. “I know that you’re being watched.”

Xander smiled a chilly smile. “We knew this already. From many angles and by many different people, I’m thinking of offering autographs. What did you see?”

“I was in Starbucks Saturday morning with Mario and Gina. The Godfather trilogy was showing at The Sun and we’d decided to get tanked up on mocha’s and donuts before trying to sit through the whole shebang.”

Xander’s eyes lit up and for a second he forgot why Dwight was sitting in his office.

“They’re showing The Godfather straight through?” What were the chances of getting Spike to sit still that long? Maybe he could persuade Willow and Dawn to go with him.

“Were, it was a one time only deal. Anyway some geeky looking kid, about your age came in and he was asking questions about that guy who used to own the Magic Box, said he was relation of some kind and needed to find him urgently.”

“But he didn‘t know where he lived and was asking around in Starbucks. Did it not seem odd that he wasn‘t asking in say, The Magic Box?”

“To me yes, but Mario asked him if he thought he looked like some whacked out magic freak who did sorcery as a sideline and the kid just mumbled something and bolted. I just thought he was a weirdo out on his day pass and didn’t really give him another thought. Until I read this morning’s paper and it said that Mr Rupert Giles, former Magic Box proprietor had been the victim of an attempted robbery and assault. It was then that I remembered he’d been looking for him and that I had seen his face around before.”

“Where?” Xander felt sick despite the fact they already had an idea who Giles’ intruder had been.

“Here actually. I saw him a couple of times, parked up in a black van with two other guys. I didn’t think too much about it at the time, figured they worked for local government, road works or something.”

Xander had always known that Dwight wasn’t as ignorant to the town’s underbelly as most of its residents pretended to be, but he hadn’t realized that meant he also knew about the resistance fighting the evil that resided here. How much did he know about them? He’d already mentioned Buffy, did he know about Spike?

Speak of the devil.

“Sorry Love, didn’t know you were busy, shall I come back later?”

He was holding two steaming mugs of delicious smelling hot chocolate and Xander’s mouth watered appreciatively. He put his hands out and readily clasped them around the proffered mug.

“No Spike you should hear this. Dwight here saw Warren and the others in that geek van parked up outside of here a few times, and I know Buffy saw them here that one time when she almost worked here. And it looks like Andrew was trying to find out where Giles lives last Saturday morning.”

Dwight stared at Spike as he sat down next to him.

“You look different, warmer somehow.”

“Yeah well I packed up the smokes. Does wonders for the old complexion.”

“What in the space of three days? There’s more to it than that. You know I suspected you were a vampire, which seemed a bit odd you being with Harris and him working with the Slayer.” Spike raised an eyebrow and threw an amused look Xander’s way.

“And what do you think now?” Spike asked him sardonically.

“Doesn’t matter I guess, you’re one of the good guys that ‘s all I care about. Is Mr Giles going to be ok?”

Xander sighed heavily, it had been a very intense few days and there wasn’t any sign of it letting up.

“He’s conscious but they kept him in for observation. Thanks for the heads up Dwight, we suspected it might be him, I guess this pretty much confirms it.”

“I’m headin’ back to work now, glad I could help. Thank you, by the way, this town has no idea what you lot do to keep us safe at night.”

Xander smiled at him, and enjoyed the appreciation. He wondered how long it was going to be before everyone knew and how many would get swallowed up in the battle. He couldn’t dwell on it, they didn’t even know when it was going to happen.

“You’re welcome.” Dwight left the cabin and closed the door behind him.

“You started without me.”

“This isn’t lunch time Spike, it’s post lunch, 2.30 is more like … time for a snack because lunch has gone down and I’m feeling peckish time. What kept you?”

Spike rolled out a slow grin and dropped his gaze straight to Xander’s crotch. He pulled him to his feet and slid his arms around his waist.

“I had a bit of time to catch up on Love, I did have an extended morning break. Have you been thinking about us?”

“What do you think? Gimmee those lips.”

He kissed him softly, gentle pressure that barely parted his lips. They kissed for a few minutes and their hold on each other tightened, until Xander’s stomach grumbled again. He handed the lunch bag to Spike and they both sat down at his desk. Around mouthfuls of food, they told each what they’d been doing, which for Spike wasn’t really a lot in the variety department, mostly just lifting and carrying, and just how many bloody girders did you need to hold a building up anyway?

“Well it’s crazy here at the moment, the building permission came through for the units on the next lot. Lucky for us it‘s only next door, but they‘ve started to bring materials in already. We’re flat out until Thanksgiving and then we only have … hey we have next Thursday off for the holiday. I could maybe swing the Friday off if I pull in some overtime this week, then we’d have four days to go on a hunt. You game?”

“Well, that’s a plan. What makes you so sure we’ll know where Darla and Dru are by then?”

“I have faith in yours and Angel’s ability to sniff out your kin from fifty paces.”

“Well yeah, but we have to be within fifty paces. Up to now we don’t know squat. The last place Dru was seen was Sunnydale … you can stop laughing now Xander, I don’t think Buffy found it funny, nor Drusilla for that matter.”

“I wasn’t laughing at either of them you dope, I just remembered you dated Harmony.”

“Is that what you call it?”

Xander started laughing again until he saw the look that crossed Spike’s face.

“What is it?”

“It’s nothing.”

“Spike!”

“I just have the jitters is all.”

Xander looked at him and waited.

“Look, we can’t talk about it here. How about we take the bike up to Mount Bluff later, away from everybody and everything and we can talk if you want. See how many ways you can get grass stains on the seat of your pants, see how long you can kiss me without touching me any where with your hands.”

“That sounds nice, remind me to pack a blanket. You do know it’s November don’t you?”

“You’re allowed to be cold, I’ll warm you, but I ‘ll smack you upside yer head if you ever get boring.”

“Not boring, just likin’ the warm.” Spike looked at him from under the fringe of his eyelashes and blinked slowly, just the once. Xander caved.

“Ok then, Mount Bluff, bike, you, me. What about Giles?”

“Anya will be there fussing over him and so will Red and Buffy, we’d only get in the way. Besides they’d let us know if they needed us.” Xander’s cell rang.

“You just had to say it didn’t you? Hello? Hey Anya, how‘s Giles?”

“He‘s still broken Xander, but he‘s smiling through the pain. Have you heard from Buffy?”

“No, should I have?”

“No, I just thought, wondered if they might have told you my news.”

“You’re getting married?”

Spike raised an eyebrow at that and reached into his back pocket for his smokes. They weren’t there of course so he grabbed a pencil off Xander’s desk and started to chew on it. He did miss the nicotine there was no doubt about that, although he didn’t miss the chemicals that made it possible to inhale it, they made him cough. What he missed the most was putting a cigarette in his mouth and sucking on it.

“No, but now you’ve put that thought into my head, my news doesn’t seem so important. Now I’m going to be wondering why Giles hasn’t asked me to marry him.”

“I’m sorry Anya, but just remember you can’t make a wish for yourself. So there’ll be no boils and blinding torment flung my way. Will there be?”

“No. Nor at anyone actually. Cordelia released me from vengeance last night. D’Hoffryn showed up to make sure I would grant a wish and …”

“Someone wished around you? Are they nuts?”

Spike’s sense of foreboding came back and threatened to take a chunk out of his ass; this last week was turning into a bizarre prelude to the afterlife, and given his past, he didn’t figure he would be knocking on any pearlies and being allowed in. He sighed. That wasn’t really the problem, he knew that both he and Xander were pretty hard to kill these days, but there were worse things that could happen than losing your immortal life.

“In the beginning, yes. I think she was mad with heartache, but she grabbed D’Hoffryn and wrapped him in this white glow and now he’s human.”

Xander’s mouth worked like a goldfish for a few moments whilst he tried to get his head around what she had said.

“Cordy zapped the vengeance out of him? What did she do to you?”

“She didn’t need to do anything. I was all set to accept the consequences for refusing to wield any more vengeance, but I didn’t have to. I was released by default. Hallie’s looking after him for now, and Buffy thinks we can give all the ex-demons rank and serial number so, all in all, a good night.”

Xander shook his head, he should be used to her by now, but she never ceased to confound and confuse him. He figured it would be easier to talk to Cordelia or Buffy. In fact it would probably be easier to talk to Win Soo at the Golden Orient in town, and he didn’t speak a word of English. He asked the only sane question he could think of.

“How are you Anya? It’s what you wanted right?”

“I did want this, I just needed to know that Giles’ would love me either way.”

“Of course he loves you, any fool can see that. I have to go and get back to work now. Should we stop by the hospital later?”

“There’s no need he has loads of visitors, Dawn just showed up fresh out of school and Willow and Tara are coming later. And he has me.” He could hear her smile at that.

“Ok, well me and Spike are going someplace tonight but I’ll have my cell, just in case. Say hi to Giles’ for us. When’s he coming home?”

“Maybe tomorrow, they’re happy with his progress so hopefully he can come home. I’ll call you and you can come get Cordelia. Not that she hasn’t been super nice, but …”

“Stop squirming Anya, I get it. She probably wants to go back to LA anyway.”

“Bye Xander.” Xander closed up his cell and pushed it into his back pocket.

Spike’s face was like thunder.

“No one’s packing Cordelia off any where until she’s good and ready to go. What’s the matter with you people, have you forgotten that we’re all supposed to be in this together?” Xander silenced him with hard lips before letting him go and glaring at him.

“Now apologise.”

“I’m sorry, I just feel …”

“I know how you feel about it, but you can’t deal with it for her. And you can’t shield her from it. Would you want to stay here any longer than you had to, in her situation? I don’t want Cordelia to go but I think she’ll want to. But if she doesn’t she can stay with us ok? She can show us her demon parts in action. Come on Spike, I’ll walk you back over and fill you in on the way.”

Spike wrapped his arms around him and buried his head against his chest. Xander couldn’t resist running his fingers through his hair, liberating tendrils that attempted to spring into curls but didn’t make it because they weren’t quite long enough. Still he looked ruffled and that would do for now.

“I’m going to love you tonight, bad mood guy, right after I kick your ass.”

~*~

After they’d all said goodbye to Angel, Wesley flicked the conference button off the phone, sat back in his chair and laced his fingertips together under his chin. Gunn shrugged his shoulders and raised his eyebrows.

“Well at least it’s been quiet around here.”

“If you don‘t count the Panthros demon we had to chase out of the Cinema Multiplex in Chinatown,” Fred said and smiled warmly at Wesley. Then remembered and smiled at Gunn too.

She felt uncomfortable to be close to Wesley whilst Charles was in the room; it felt weird having her past and her future within feet of each other and they were all still working it out. Testing the water to see if they could all still swim in it together.

“It wouldn’t have been so bad if it hadn’t started crying when Wes threatened to hose it down with salt water.” Gunn grimaced, although he couldn’t tell whether it was because he was disgusted with the demon or with himself for feeling sorry for it.

“You might have had the same reaction if you were he; it was the equivalent of threatening to hose one of us down with acid. At least they don’t kill human beings. But the stench from the thing, if only they wouldn’t insist on storing their carrion until they‘re ready to eat it, no one would have know it was there.”

“Ok, that was TMI,” Fred glared at Wesley. For all of two seconds and then a beam spread across her face at the love the shining from his eyes. She suddenly remembered Gunn was still there, but when she looked up hastily he wasn’t even looking in their direction.

“How can so much go down in such a short time? Man, I am never going to Sunnydale.”

“I wouldn’t count on that if I were you Gunn. Not only will you be needed on the frontline come D-day, there’s a good chance anyone of us might be needed there before then. We need to be on extra guard now; we don’t know if Wolfram and Hart know anything about the Tiberius Manifesto but if they do, you can bet we can expect a similar attack.”

“So we’ll just keep our eyes peeled for nerds and make sure we lock the doors at night,” Gunn said. He lifted the coffee pot and was annoyed to find it empty. “I can’t believe we drank all that already.”

“Actually, it was you who drank it all already. I’ll make some more.” Fred took the pot from him and put it on the side whilst she fished out the filter from the machine. “Poor Giles. But good for Anya, and Cordy too, I think. I wonder what else she can do?”

“So what do you think the chances are that Angel will have a reflection next time we see him?”

“It’s not going to happen that quickly Charles and … oh. You think they’ve started to Bond already?”

“I’m thinking that Angel just told us a lot with the things he wasn’t sayin‘.”

“He did sound inordinately happy considering everything that has happened.”

“Wes could you warn us when you eat a dictionary for breakfast, that way I get to decide whether to show up or not?”

“You mean you get to decide whether to come downstairs or not,” Wesley remarked dryly.

They had decided by mutual agreement to stay in the hotel for the time being. It made sense, it was their base of operations, and it was more efficient from a security point of view. They didn’t want to spread their already thinned numbers further and neither Wesley nor Gunn had wanted to leave Fred alone.

“So which one of us has to sing?”

“Do we have to, we could just do what Angel does and beat the information out of Merl, if there’s anything worth knowing, you know he’ll know it.”

“I’ve find that paying him works much better. We should go to Caritas anyway, it is his usual haunt, that way if he doesn’t show we can all sing.”

Coffee pot and discarded filter in hand, Fred juggled both to open the office door only to find Gavin Park standing on the other side. Wesley and Gunn both jumped to their feet before Fred could utter so much as a squeak.

Gavin regarded them all silently, unruffled and looking for all the world like he had every right to be there and they were the intruders.

“I think you’re familiar with the term that usually greets one of your visits Mr Park, so rather than repeat it, I think Gunn and I will just show you the door.”

Gavin smiled smoothly. “Or you could be sensible and ask yourselves why I’m here at all. Alone.”

“Ok, why you here?” Gunn scowled at him.

“I think we’ll take this into the lobby if you don’t mind, suddenly this room is entirely airless,” Wesley said and forced Gavin to move back as he walked through the door with Fred and Gunn following closely behind.

Fred dumped the filter into the nearest bin and put the pot down on the counter top. Then she joined Gunn and Wesley who stood before Gavin with their arms folded.

“Ok talk, you have a minute to convince me it’s something worth listening to.”

“So, Angel isn’t back yet?”

They all just looked at him.

“I just thought he should hear it too, it does concern him the most, considering the role he and his girlfriend are set to play,” he said with a fake smile.

“Fifty seconds.” Wesley’s expression was neutral but he got an unpleasant jolt of shock from his remark and wondered how much he really knew.

This was a planned visit, but it wasn’t organized with Gavin’s usually efficiency. He hadn’t had long to work out fine detail, but he had looked on in sick fascination as the Book of Aurelius was delivered into Lilah’s hands instead of his own. She’d allowed him to stay and hear what the book revealed, lording it over him and dishing out orders to the team he should have been leading. Still, he was willing to bet that Lilah hadn’t heard of the Tiberius Manifesto; eavesdropping was so underrated.

“I understand that there was an attack on Rupert Giles last night and I might just have some information on it that Angel would be interested in.” Wesley laughed at him.

“You’ll have to do better than that, we suspected Wolfram and Hart had something to do with it immediately. Mr Meers was only too willing to give your name up when Angel retrieved the book from him in the first place.”

“That isn’t what I meant. I’m talking about the operative they used, and, for the record, it was Lilah who was behind it.”

“I would imagine the reason you’re here at all has more to do with the fact that Lilah appears to be doing considerably better in the pissing contest between the two of you, than because you have any desire to help Angel Investigation’s.”

“It‘s true I have a personal interest in this, what better motivation could I have for being here? This way, we both stand to gain something.”

“You mean we get information and you get one over Lilah . Sounds like a dubious trade but do go on.”

”Andrew Wells arrived at Wolfram and Hart early this morning and joined Warren Meers in Lilah’s office. Originally Meers was acting under my instruction, what can I say, he got a better offer. She’s had interpreters going over the Book of Aurelius with a fine tooth comb for the last five hours.”

“You need to get to the part where you tell us something we didn’t know or suspect already,” Gunn barked at him.

“She has contacts already searching for the whereabouts of Darla and Drusilla.”

Gavin waited for their expressions to change at the news and was disappointed when none were forthcoming.

“Is that all? Because all you‘ve given us so far is old news. Don‘t worry though, Lilah will be pissed when she finds out you‘ve been here. Perhaps just not for the right reasons.” Wesley smiled at him smugly.

Gavin took a deep breath; all the way over here he’d been running recent events through his mind on fast speed. Finding out that Angel’s soul was anchored and that he was involved again with Buffy Summers. Hiring Meers under instructions from Linwood to keep a watch on the Slayer and her gang of perpetual do-gooders, sending him into Sunnydale catacombs to search for the book. The Bonding of Xander Harris and Spike, and Lilah’s botched kidnap attempt.

It had replayed it in his mind’s eye over and over, searching for something, anything that would enable him to get back into Linwood’s good graces and seize control of the situation back from Lilah’s, well manicured grasp. And then suddenly it clicked and he had to find away to get out of here quickly. He was going over Linwood’s head with this, straight to the Senior Partners.

“I have this for you.” He handed Wesley a piece of paper with writing on it. “Meers and Wells are both staying at this address and I have it on good authority that a third part is about to join them. Someone by the name of Jonathan Levinson.

I don’t know what Lilah intends to do with them now he has what she wants, but I figured if she was willing to put them up somewhere and arrange to get Levinson out of jail, they must still have their uses. I thought this would save you time searching for them and then Angel and the Slayer can deal with them however they see fit. I understand they are all connected with a murder enquiry.”

“Do they have security here?”

“Only the kind they normally have at business class hotels.”

“If this is some kind of trap,” Gunn burst out hotly.

“It isn’t a trap. I walked in here with no problem at all. For an investigation’s outfit I have to tell you your security is …” Gavin looked about the place in derision. “ … nonexistent. If I had wanted to hurt any of you, I could have done so and left without a trace well before anyone had reported you were missing or dead.”

~*~

Trees whipped passed them as they ran. Xander imagined he felt much like a wild stallion liberated from its cruel tether, and welcomed the burn of ocean scented oxygen as he forced it repeatedly into his lungs. It was exhilarating. He’d never been particularly athletic throughout school, brief spell on the Sunnydale High swim team notwithstanding, and he was thrilled at his body’s new capacity for speed.

He knew the two of them were matched, stride for stride, and it felt incredibly erotic to share this kind of physical prowess with his mate. For now at least, the woods below Mount Bluff belonged to them and whatever night crawler and demon lurked there, he knew no fear. Without need for spoken communication, they speeded up, sharing a mutual desire to take it to the max.

Shoeless and naked, they moved swiftly over jutting rock and loose surface with sure feet and as Xander yelled his joy into the night sky, he wondered seriously if he could achieve enough velocity to become airborne. Spike grinned and joined Xander’s whoop with a primordial shout of his own. This was better than chasing after prey, not least because he knew the prize at the end of this was his lover and all the fighting and fucking he could stand.

The real test came when they cleared the woods and started the ascent up the side of the Bluff. The change came over both of them simultaneously, preternatural sense from feral golden orbs lit their path in a way the fullness of the moon overhead never could. They climbed easily and as Spike drank in the sight of Xander at his side, he wondered if anyone fortunate enough to see their long strides eating up the distance would be struck speechless by their beauty, before they registered their forms were otherworldly.

They reached the top with Spike barely feet ahead; he stopped abruptly and Xander ran into the back of him and wrestled him to the ground. They rolled like lion cubs, clinging and growling, before jumping to their feet and facing each other. Panting heavily and with sweat dripping from them in skin-soaking rivulets, they assumed battle stance and circled one another. Fangs bared and blood-lust screaming through their bodies they sprang.

Xander’s reflexes had improved tremendously since the transformation, but Spike knew that he had the upper hand through vast experience. He deflected punch after punch, predicting Xander’s moves with eerie accuracy before changing tactics and going on the defensive. He spun around, his left leg high, but Xander surprised him and stopped the roundhouse kick before it connected with the side of his head. Spike recovered his balance and dropped his foot, his ankle eluding grabbing fingers.

He followed through with two quick jabs to Xander’s upper abdomen, careful to avoid the erection that was so hard and engorged it barely left his stomach when he moved. Xander suddenly dropped low and rushed at Spike’s knees; laughing through his snarls, Spike danced out of the way and Xander fell to the floor. Spike didn’t give him time to get up, he pulled his feet out from under his knees and laughing even harder collapsed on top of him.

They stilled at the contact, and Xander became aware then of the thick aroma of blood that was undoubtedly coming from both of their feet and he wondered how much and for how long they were going to hurt from their game. But it wasn’t over yet and Spike moved away long enough to flip him onto his back and with lightning speed they were fused in lip-lock.

The tempo changed and hands softly caressed skin, skin that was still warm despite the plummeting temperature. Their heart’s beat in a heavy staccato rhythm, and their breath panted harshly in and out; there was nothing to slow and calm them as the two of them worshipped each others bodies. Spike devoured every inch of quivering flesh exposed to him, kissing his way down Xander’s lean torso until he came to the apex of his thighs.

Xander moaned out his pleasure as Spike engulfed the head of his cock and he bucked his hips until he was fully sheathed into the searing heat of his lover’s mouth. Spike pinned him to the floor, hands on hips, and sucked and nibbled his way around the stiff column of flesh until he drew blood, and with a final gasp from Xander, semen.

Spike flipped him again and pulling him up on his knees sank his eager member between the globes of his ass with a sob of pure delight. One hand around Xander’s waist and the other in his hair, Spike rode him, thrusting hard, hard, harder, gliding past sensitive nub time and again until all Xander was aware of was sparks behind closed eyelids, the building ache of pleasure deep inside his balls and a culmination that slaked the ground below him without his cock being touched once.

Spike was aware of everything. The trees rustled, whispering their strange language in a breeze that was rapidly turning to wind and overhead a flock of seagulls cried as they soared. Below the Bluff, reminders of civilisation burst sporadically through the night, but he tuned them out as he listened instead for the ocean’s waves, let the roar of it fill his ears as it crashed against the shore. Pleasure ripped through his body as it built and peaked and then stayed for seconds, a minute and peaked again before finally sending him over the edge and into a boneless screaming heap only held up by Xander’s body.

He withdrew his still throbbing cock from Xander’s twitching passage and sank to the floor, pulling Xander back with him until he was cradled in his lap. He wrapped shaking arms around the top of his chest and buried his head at the side of his neck.

“I told you I‘d keep you warm.”

“And that was in no way boring, although now I’m thinking ‘ouch’ and merciful Zeus my feet are bleeding!”

“If that’s an offer Pet, I had something more substantial in mind.”

Spike turned Xander around in his lap and kissed him hungrily, tasting happiness and spent desire on his breath and wished the Hellmouth was closed already and they could just pack up and go. Far from here … to places he already seen and desperately wanted to show him, away from the sick feeling of impending doom that had taken up residence in his gut … away from the things that imprisoned them.

The cold started to penetrate Xander’s rapidly cooling skin, but he was barely aware of it as the two of them sank their fangs into each other’s necks and slowly drank their fill. Dressing later from the pile of clothes near the parked bike, they looked at each other and grinned. There was nothing else to do, nothing was adequate to express the way that they felt about each other, and it was either grin or sob during the times it overwhelmed them.

Once fully clothed they sat down next to each other in front of the bike, their arms draped across one another’s shoulders. Spike pushed a cigarette he had no intention of lighting into his mouth and grinned around it when Xander poured them both steaming cups of hot chocolate from the flask he had prepared before they had set out.

“Ok, I admit it, I’m starting to feel the cold and I know we won’t be able to stay here for much longer now we aren’t moving. I’m glad you’re you Pet, or we wouldn’t be drinking this now. I don’t suppose you have any marshmallows do you?”

Xander reached into the backpack and after fishing out a packet, tossed it on Spike’s lap.

“I’ve even got some balm to put on your feet if you don’t think they’re healing quickly enough on their own.” Spike gave him an indulgent smile.

“Yes, but we don’t know if it will work, do we?”

“True, but we know darn well it can’t do us any harm.” Spike smiled at him sadly.

“Unless you count the harm that can be inflicted on the inside.” He pressed his fingertips to Xander’s temples. “Here …” he dropped his fingers to his chest. “…and here.”

“You’re really are having a wiggins about Darla and Drusilla aren’t you?”

“It doesn’t help them being a part of it, but I figure they‘re merely instruments of destruction.” Spike tossed the cigarette away and turned to him, pinning him with the full intensity of eyes that were blue again. “Xander I’m only a good man by default. I didn’t choose to take this route and if I’d been given a choice, I wouldn’t have only said no to government hardwear, I would have left a bloody signature on the wall.”

Xander stared at him. “So what, now you think you’ll have to pay for not wanting to go against your nature? What can they possibly do? We’re invincible remember.”

“No we’re not, there might be only one way to kill us, but the moment the bad guy founds out how to do it, we’re fair game.”

“You think Drusilla or Darla will kill us?”

“No, not us. I think they’ll hurt you and Buffy if they get the chance, and they’ll enjoy every minute of making me and Angel pay for not being who we used to be.”

“And you think this will happen because all of a sudden you’re feeling guilty?”

“No, I think this now because I’m feeling so fucking happy I’m fit to burst and I know I don’t really have the right.”

Xander tightened his hold on Spike’s shoulders.

“You’re looking at it all wrong you know. We all go through life having things thrust upon us that we don’t want, but the important thing is what you do with it. You might not have chosen your path Spike, but once you were put on it, without the aid of signposts, you pretty much always chose the right direction to walk. That’s what’s important.

We have talked about all this stuff before, how you could have carried on with the murdering and the carnage. You were a Master vampire, if you had wanted to, you could have found plenty who were willing to do the killing and maiming for you, but you didn’t.”

“Only because I fell in love with Buffy.”

“Exactly, you were willing to give up evil for the sake of someone else. Because you wanted to make her happy.”

“Xander that’s not entirely true, it was far less noble than that, it was mostly because I wanted her to love me.”

“Maybe initially, but whose love were you looking for when she died Spike? You made a promise. A promise that couldn’t benefit you all that much, not as a demon …and you stuck to it. You made a conscious decision to do right back then and now you’ve agreed to work for The Powers That Be.” A grin spread across Spike’s face.

“Yeah well that was easy, it does have enormous fringe benefits.”

“Which you had already started to enjoy before you even found out the PTB existed. Those fringe benefits didn’t come as a condition attached to your decision. None of us had to agree to fight for the closure of the Hellmouth. Heck even Buffy had a choice and she’s the Slayer. What I’m trying to say is that you’re defined by your choices. Sometimes the choices are shit and even if they’re the right ones they don’t bring guarantees.”

“Is this part of your argument designed to stop me worrying?”

Xander bit back his frustration; he wasn’t a man of words, despite the fact his mouth never stopped running, and if you wanted articulate explanations of philosophical concepts, well you asked Giles. He thought for a while and Spike for his part let him without interruption.

“What I’m trying to say is this: something could go wrong, but it isn’t a foregone conclusion. And even if it does, I don’t believe it will be because you deserve it.”

Spike kissed him then; he grabbed the back of his head, jerked him forward and mashed his lips on Xander’s mouth. It lacked finesse but it conveyed all he was trying to say. He buried his fingers in his hair and held him close for minute, emotion threatening to overwhelm him again.

“Spike, I’m freezing my ass off here, let’s go home.”

TBC