-5ive take the Lad Test-
While larking around on the beach in LA with the
fanciable Fivesters,we persuaded them to undergo a
serious bout of totty-testing to see if they'd reveal
their soft spots! Check out their answers,then try out
the test on a boy you know to discover his level of
laddishness...
1. If you met a girl you liked and did the whole 'phone
number-swapping thang,when would you call?
Sean:"Ooh,it would depend.If she was /really/beautiful,
I'd definitely call her within the week."
Scott:"If,say,we met on Monday,I'd probably ring on
Wednesday or
>Thursday. I'd leave it a /little/ while."
>Rich: "Yeah, three or four days sounds right.If I really liked her,
I'd probably leave it longer than if I didn't."
Abs:"I'd phone her the next day- if you like someone
there's just no point in leaving it."
J:"I'd play it a /bit/cool and wait three days.I'd never
call the very next day- no /way/."
YOUR BOY:______________________________________________
2. Have you ever considered dropping yer trews and
pulling a moony?
Sean:"Yeah,I've done it a few times.I've sung songs on a
bus and pulled moonies at the same time!"
Scott:"Yeah,me and J opened the slide doors in the van
and did it once Ha=Ha!"
Rich:"I did one when I was in the scouts once.I was 11.
I haven't done it since,though- it's /soooo/vulgar!"
Abs:"I agree.It's funny to watch but I wouldn't do it
myself."
J:"Why not?It's ace.I've pulled moonies/everywhere/- in
hotels,in airports,on buses,in cars on the M6..."
YOUR BOY:______________________________________________
3. How often d'you change your boxers?
Sean:"It depends how many clean pairs I've got.Four or
five days would be the longest I'd leave it."
Scott:"About,erm,every two days,but not without taking
them off and rinsing them!"
Rich:"Every day- I feel scummy if I don't.I change my
socks,too,before they go crispy!"
Abs:"Every day.If I don't have any clean ones to wear I
just have to take a shower and don't wear any."
J:Every day...sometimes twice.I'm really clean,me."
YOUR BOY:______________________________________________
4. If you had to choose between watching footie on TV
and a date with your girl, which'd it be?
Sean:"If it was England,I'd ask my girlfriend to watch
with me,then make up for it with a really special date
afterwards."
Scott:"I'd pick the date any day. I could tape football,
but I couldn't tape the date."
Rich:"The date,definitely.I'm not an avid footie fan and
I always hear the score on the news."
Abs: "Seeing my girlfriend 'cause I only like watching
football when the World Cup is on.I find it boring!"
J:"The date.Girls are more important than football.They're
more important than most things,in fact."
YOUR BOY:______________________________________________
5. If you get off with a girl at a party,do you tell
your mates all the details?
Sean:"Nah,I wouldn't go bragging to everyone about it.I
might tell someone in passing,but that's it."
Scott:"If it was a just a kiss,I'd tell a couple of
people,but if it was more,then it's none of their
business.I wouldn't even tell my best mate /everything/."
Rich:"I'd tell everyone in the band,but not,like,/details/.
I'd be very vague about it!"
Abs:"I wouldn't tell anyone,no way- what happens is
private."
J:"Oh,I'd tell some of my mates that I'd kissed her,but
nothing else.It's sad telling everyone any more."
YOUR BOY:______________________________________________
6. What are the ingredients of a Victoria Sponge?
Sean:"I haven't a clue!Erm, milk and flour?"
Scott:"Flour,butter and milk.Mix 'em together,put it in
a baking tin and stick it in the oven at 180=B0!"
Rich: Eggs,flour,sugar,milk.You whisk it around,add some
milk and put it in the oven.Then put jam and cream in
the middle!"
Abs: "Flour, eggs, milk.You put the flour in a bowl with
the egg and the butter,then cook it."
J:"Flour,water,egg,sugar,and salt.You sift the flour,
stir in the butter,then bung it all in the oven.I know
these things- I'm a talented geezer!"
YOUR BOY:______________________________________________
7. How many kinds of curry dishes can you name in 60
seconds... starting= now?
Sean:"Chicken tikka,biryani,vindaloo,naan bread,onion
bahjees,erm,lemon chicken,chicken curry,beef curry,
poppadoms."
Scott:"I haven't got a clue,I hate curry."
Rich:"Jalfrezi,dhansak,chicken tikka massala,lamb balti,
meat balls,vindaloo,prawn curry.That's it."
Abs:"Chicken tikka,korma,balti,hot,medium... oh,I don't
know."
J:"Biryani,vindaloo,rogan josh,tandoori,bhuna,jalfrezi...
I can cook curry.I make a wicked korma!"
8. Which celeb would you rather be- Chris Evans,Liam,
Gary Barlow or Peter Andre?
Sean:"Liam Gallagher.He has a real laugh."
Scott:"Gary Barlow- I respect him and his music.Not
Liam- he spends most of his time in pubs."
Rich:"I wouldn't wanna be anyone but me, but If I /had/
to choose,I'd be Liam 'cause he doesn't give a damn."
Abs:"Chris Evans.It's be nice to know what it's like to
have your own radio show... and be ginger!"
J: "Yeah, Chris Evans- he does what he wants."
YOUR BOY:_______________________________________________
what a result!
1. more than tree days=3D five lad points.Three days or
fewer=3D zero lad=points.
2. Yes=3D five lad points.No=3D zero lad points.
3. Less frequently than every two days=3D five lad
points.Every two days or more frequently=3D zero lad
points.
4. The footie match=3D five lad points.The date=3D zero
lad points.
5. Yes=3D five lad points.No=3D zero lad points.
6. Less than three correct answers=3D five lad points.
Three or more correct answers=3D zero lad points.
(Correct answers: flour,eggs,butter,sugar,baking powder,
cream and jam.)
7. More than five=3D five lad points.Five or fewer=3D
zero lad points.
8. Liam or Chris=3D five lad points.Peter or Gary=3D
zero lad points.
Now add up those points!
the verdict!
So how did the Five lads and your boy fare?
ABS: 5 lad points
SEAN: 30 lad points
SCOTT: five lad points
RICH: 20 lad points
J: 15 lad points
YOUR BOY: ______________________________________________
0-10 Awww! Far from being a fisticuffin',curry-scoffin'
lad,he really is a bit of a softie at heart.he loves
hanging out with his mates but loves you just as much
and will always check his behaviour when you're around-
fab,so as long as he doesn't go /too/ soppy on you!
15-25 An average lad,he's destined to act up sometimes
(as they do),but is unlikely to shame you or do anything
/too/ serious.Yes, he will bug or embarrass you
occasionally,but deep down he really does care and he
isn't too saddy laddy to tell you!
30-40 Eek!You'd best watch this one!Let him out of your
sight for too long and god know /what/ he'll be up to.
A real cheeky one,he just loves impressing his mates and
if that means breaking a few hearts and a few rules,so
be it.Oh dear!
