Things Girls Should Know, but Don't
No females are permitted to become enraged with Bronson as a result of this Log. It is for entertainment purposes only.
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask Bronson.
2. If you ask a question they don't want an answer to, they should expect an answer you don't want to hear.
3. Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
4. Don't ask me what I’m thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as navel fluff, the shotgun formation, & wrestling.
5. Sunday=TV Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
6. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
7. You have enough clothes.
8. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don't expect us to like it.
9. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work.
10. No, we don't know what day it is. We never will.Mark anniversaries on a forkin' calendar.
11. Yes, pissing standing up is more difficult than pissing from pointblank range. We're bound to miss now & again.
12. Most guys own two to three pairs of shoes – what makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
13. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
14. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.See a doctor.
15. Yeah, we like to sleep in after being kept on the phone till 3 in the morning.
16. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
All comments become null and void after 7 days.
17. If something we said could be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.
18. Let us stare. If we don't look at other women, how can we know how hot OUR girlfriend is?
19. Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.
20. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done, not both.
21. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
22. Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
23. Women wearing WonderBras and tight shirts lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.
24. Telling us that the chicks in the Playboy are airbrushed makes you look jealous and stupid and it's certainly not going to keep us from reading the magazine.
25. A shirt is NEVER "too tight" (unless you are grotesquely fat).
~Official Property of Bronson Creations Inc.~
Email: thebronsman@yahoo.com
