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The next day everything started out normal. Then Panda spotted a small article on the last page of the days paper. "Man Accused Of Assulting Two Newsies Escapes!" her heart froze, and her blood ran cold.(an: we all know where this is headed don't we@_@)

"You ok? asked Race coming up to her.

Panda nodded, slowly opening her tightly closed eyes. Now that she thought about it, there was no reason to tell Race anything. He wouldn't go after Race, and she didn't want him to get hurt again. She could take whatever he gave, until they caught him again. She knew this was stupid, but she didn't really care at that point. As strange as it was, she could actually feel herself getting ready to relapse. As in at that point she had to concentrate very hard to form two words "I'm fine" She felt herself begin to look around, wide eyed, and she tried to make herself as dimunitive as possible.

When Swinger came up behind her, she jumped. "Sorry, you ok?" asked Swinger, looking somewhat concerned.

Panda nodded again, and attempted to smile.

"Ok", she said, looking at Panda strangly once more, then leaving.

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Panda seriously debated with herself on where to sell. She was alone again, because Race was selling with Jack, trying to talk him into going to the tracks. The last place she wanted to be was at the ring, but she was afraid if she didn't show, Andy would be mad and hate her, and she wanted everyone to love her, so...off to the ring she went. She didn't know why he even wanted her to be there, but she wasn't about to ask questions. He only mentioned it, but she wasn't about to take chances either.

She got there, and began to sell, trying to ignore the three in the corner by the ring. Scott and Frankie were talking excitedly to Andy. It seemed like some sort of a pep talk, not that Andy needed it by the looks of him. He was very...energetic to say the least. In fact, they practically had to hold him down to keep him still.

Andy spotted her a moment later, despite her attempts to keep them from noticing her. "Hey Panda! Over here!" he said as if she couldn't see them.

Panda closed her eyes quickly, to calm herself. She was still shaken up about her father, and she wasn't sure how well she could deal with other people right now. Well, she supposed she was about to find out.

She walked over "Didn't think you'd come" said Scott smiling

"That makes two of us" she said under her breath

"But" he continued, "Ya couldn't just let our champ here fight by himself right?"

Panda shrugged "Good selling spot..."

Frankie snorted, and Andy laughed, apparenty at ease.

Andy rolled his eyes "Just turned 18, and already, your making plans aren't ya?"

"What? What makes you think that?" he asked innocently

"Our Champ?" asked Andy, raising an eyebrow

Scott shrugged "yeah well..."Scott then smiled, and something in it made Panda decidedly uneasy."How bout a good luck kiss?" he asked innocently

Panda said not a word, but looked at him grimly for quite awhile.

Whes she finally turned away, she heard Scotts voice "So thats a no?" then she heard sort of an "uuuumph!" noise, like the kind you make when someone elbows you in the stomach.

She was once again fighting a strangely strong urge to blush when She heard another voice from behind her "You're still comin tonight, right?"

Panda shrugged, knowing full well, she had no intention of going anywhere when her father was out. It was too dangerous.

"I'll be going in about eight, I'll stop by, and walk with ya if ya want" said Andy

"No!" she said, then took a deep breath "I mean, why waste your time, I'm fine?" she said turning around.

"No waste!" grinned Andy "Sides, that way I can make sure your goin" he winked, then took off his shirt, hopped oer some ropes, and was in the ring two seconds later, while Panda was still trying to say but-.

Panda looked to oth Scott and Frankie for help, but Frankie shrugged his shoulders. Scott however said "Oh yeah, and I got a last minute problem, but thats ok, still come, I'll just get Andy to work with ya"

Panda looked at him in both shock and dispair. No doubt his appointment was real, but he was very obviously enjoying this.

"I-I can't..."she said softly, attempting to make an excuse, but apparently neither of the two heard her. They were already focused on the beginning of the fight.

Andy and a man who looked to be several years older, and several pounds heavier, circled each other wearily. All humor was gone from Andys eyes. They threw a few punches, and then the fight was over almost as quickly as it began. His opponent made one mistake, just a small one, he dropped his right hand for a moment, and that was all that Andy needed. He moved in, and threw punch after punch, until the other man was on the ground. His opponent laid still. Andy won, the crowd cheered, and just as Andy left the ring, the other man's trainer hopped into the ring, and began to try to help the dazed man up.

Panda left. She didn't talk to Andy first. She left, and she left in a hurry. She didn't feel good all of the sudden. She had a big problem stomaching the fact that someone who tried to be so nice to her could get into a ring, and do what he did to another person. She tried to rationalize with herself, saying that the other man knew the risks but chose to enter the ring, but she couldn't help but feel the way she felt. She also, much to her horror, found that there was also a tiny part of her that loved that fight. Every minute of it. And she was pretty sure that was what bothered her more than anything.

She sold her papers alone for the rest of the day, and thought about everything. She liked boxing, and would love to learn to do it. Holding her back were four obvious things. One, money, two, the violence, three, she was a girl, and four, she was sure she wouldn't be any good. In the end, she decided that she didn't know what she thought, and she was so tired of thinking that she decided that she didn't even want to know.

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That night, Panda tried to wait for Andy, and tried to make herself get ready to go to the gym. She couldn't do it. Seeing what he could do to a peson if he wanted to, scared her. It was probably a combination of watching him, and news about her father, and her normal fear of people. So after she decided she wasn't going, she tried to get every single person in the Lodging House to cover for her. No one would do it, and she was getting pretty desperate by the time she came up to Quips, Irish, and Beaner, sitting on the Lodging House steps.

"But why?" asked Quips

"Yeah" asked Beaner "Why'd ya want us to do dat?"

"If you saw what he did to that guy, you wouldn't want to be around him either" said Panda quietly.

"Dats your problem!?" asked Quips incredulously

"Well...if your sure...I guess" said Irish

"Thanks!" said Panda feeling almost strangely disappointed. At the time she didn't know it, but she had no need to feel like this, because of her wonderful friends.(authors note:once again, I say this sarcastically)

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They were still sitting outside when Andy came up to the door. "Panda there?" he asked

"Yes" said Beaner, looking at him and saying nothing else

"Okay then, is she ready to go?"

"No"

"She said that we're supposed to tell you shes sick" said Quips conversationally "But shes really not"

"Oh really?" asked Andy, matching her conversational tone, despite his confusion. "And why would she tell you to do something like that?"

"Cause ya scared her" said Beaner, suddenly becoming half-serious.

"Huh?" asked Andy suprised "Whaddaya mean I scared her?"

Irish spoke up quietly "You have to understand about Panda, shes been through a lot..." apparently she realized she'd said too much, and she stopped "Just trust me, shes had a hard time. She has her reasons"

Andy looked at everyone in confusion"So...now what?"

"Go straight up the stairs, shes probably in the bunkroom"

"Ok, I guess that means I should go get her" he started up the steps, having no idea why he was going to all this trouble for someone he hardly even knew.

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"Panda?" asked Andy questioningly

Panda had been trying to sleep with no luck so far, but at the sound of Andys voice, her eyes flew open, "Whats he doing here?" she thought. She heard him call her name again, and got up, getting the crazy idea that she could walk out the door without him seeing her.

She was about halfway there when she heard "Hey! There you are!"

Panda turned to look at him, with a calm expression on her face "hello"

"I heard I scared you? That true?" he asked bluntly

Panda froze "No" She mumbled

"Why?"

"I'm not really, your just..."

"Just what?" he asked, honestly curious now.

"Violent"

"Violent! I'm violent?"

"No, your not violent. But you...were being violent."

"Oh"

"And I...don't like people being hurt"

I'm sorry"

Even Panda had to smile at the look of pitifully attempted sadness on his face."It wasn't your fault, I'm just pathetic"

"Well thats not a nice thing to say about yourself"

Panda shrugged "Its true"

"I promise I won't ask you to any more fights, but could you please come to the gym with me? Scott told me to work with ya, and if you don't come, I have nothing else to do for an hour or two."

Panda shrugged, I will if you want me to" she said softly, getting up, still not very thrilled about the whole idea. In actuality, the reason for her going went back to her troublesome problem with saying no to people.

Andy grinned to himself. She really was sweet, in her own "scared of everything" way

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"Good! Good, now your gonna move to the left when I jab, like this" said Andy, a half hour later, demonstrating.

Panda was trying as hard as she could, and getting frustrated with herself. She was doing everything right, he told her she was, but it just didn't seem to be quite right.

Andy seemed to realize this, because he stopped and said "Ok, relax, your doing great! Really, I wouldn't tell you, you were if you weren't."

Panda sighed, "No, I'm not, I know I'm not, you don't have to try to be nice. I'm sorry"

Andy raised an eyebrow. An entire unprovoked sentence, he was impressed. "I'm not lying, and will you please stop apoligizing?"

"Sorry-I mean, oops, Sorry, I didn't mean to...Oh, ok" she finally gave up.

Andy just barely managed to keep a straight face "I'm serious, do you want verification? Hold on, I'll get someone..."

"No!" Panda said quickly, "thats ok"

He laughed "Loosen up, your fine." He studied her for a moment "How old are you?"

"Sixteen...why?"

"You just seem older, like a lot older"

Panda shrugged, clearly not knowing what to make of this.

"Not bad, just odd"

"Funny" Panda mumbled to herself "I've been hearing a lot of that lately"

They soon resumed the lesson, and after that, it was soon over. Panda was getting ready to leave when Andy told her to wait ten minutes, so he could go with her. While she was waiting, she wandered around, compulsively straightening things. She couldn't really help it.

She was in the middle of putting a pile of gloves into two piles, bag gloves, and boxing gloves, (Although to her, the only difference was size) and then arranging the gloves from oldest to newest, when Andy came for her. When he saw what she was doing he laughed. "Heaven knows we need someone like you around here! Boy would that be a big help!" Andy got an idea then. "Would you do it?"

"Do what?" asked Panda, picking at a string on an old boxing glove.

"Clean! I bet Frankie would give ya free lessons like us if ya worked here! You wouldn't be a trainer, but still... I'd have to check, but it should be fine!"

Panda wouldn't have been able to tell you why at the time, but she thought about it carefully, for a moment, and then said yes. "But they won't give up on me when I don't learn anything?" She asked, dead seriously.

"Really! Your doing fine! Geez! You worry too much!"

***********************************************************************************************************

Well, Frankie came back the next day, and readily agreed. He liked Panda despite her scilence, and nervousness. Besides that, he still felt a little guilty. The side of her face wasn't totally better yet.

Andy didn't have anything particular to do the next afternoon, so he decided to go over and tell Panda. He had the distinct feeling that despite her agreeability, if he didn't go to her, then he'd probably never see her again.

Andy walked up to the Lodging House door, not sure if he should knock, or what exactally. Luckily for him, a group of people were coming in.

"Hello" said a girl looking at him blankly "Can we help ya?"

"Um, I'm looking for Panda..."

"Panda!" said the girl, trying not to look suprised. "Hi, I'm Swinger...and you are..."

"Andy, hi."

"Ohhhh! Your Andy. Come on in."

He raised an eyebrow, and followed her into the Lodging House.

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Panda was inside quietly talking to Race.

"Panda!" Called Swinger up the stairs "Theres a guy here! Says his names Andy!"

Race looked at her "Andy?"

"The guy from before" said Panda softly. "I have no idea what he wants"

"Ya mean da one dat walked ya home?" asked Race

Panda nodded, getting up

"I like him" Race grinned "Hes smart. Good thing he didn't let ya walk home by yourself"

"Yeah, well, I'm gonna go see what he wants now"

Panda walked down the stairs, slowly, and saw Andy leaning against the inside of the doorframe, talking to Skittery, Pie Eater, Jack, and Swinger. Pie Eater was laughing, as Andy described a fight he had recently seen.

"Hey" said Andy, seeing her standing there. "Its ok with Frankie, come on, he wants to talk to you, and unless you have somethin else to do, then we could just as well go now."

Panda nodded, and the two left, the Lodging House, and four very confused people in their wake.

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"Don't know why we didn't think of dis before" said Frankie about twenty minutes later. "Like I said, dis is basically just cleaning up da place, and in exchange for an hour or two a day, you get classes. It doesn't really matter to me how many, as many classes as they're willing to give you I guess. Theres no money involved. We don't give you any, and you don't pay us any. You can use the equipment here, and that should be about it. Did I forget anything Andy?"

"Whos gonna do her classes?" he asked

"You, Scott, me, whoevers around and free"said Frankie "She doesn't know enough for it to matter as of now."He turned to Panda "So when do you wanna start?"

"Nows fine I guess" said Panda quietly "It doesn't matter to me"

"Well" said Frankie laughing "she coitainly is agreeable, ain't she? Um, ok, lets see, ya could...well, gee, how long since anyones swept in here?" he asked Andy

"I have no idea!" said Andy laughing as well. "Well the brooms in the closet, so..." but it was too late, Panda already had the door open, and was getting things out.

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Four hours later, Panda was still working, with no apparent intention of stopping. She had sweeped and mopped the floor, cleaned the window, cleaned the dirt off of a lot of equipment equipment, untangled a few dozen jumpropes, and most of the people there had the distinct impression that if they had given her a can of paint, she would have started working on the walls.

She was debating on what to do next when Andy came up to her "Ain't ya tired yet?"

Panda looked at him, not sure if she had been doing something wrong. She decided to play it safe "Sorry" she said, hoping it was the right answer.

"Here we go again"He laughed. "I was just wondering if ya wanted to go home. Its eight, and I'm leavin now, and I'd rather walk with ya then let ya go by yourself."

"Kay" Panda stood up and dusted off her shirt.

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When she got to the Lodging House, the door was slightly ajar, "thats odd" thought Panda, as she faintly remembered something about everyone going to a party in Brooklyn. She wondered who would be in there, and not even bother to shut the door all the way.

Just before she went inside, Andy asked "Could I get a drink of water real quick? I'm dying, Frankie's faucet's broken!"

Panda smiled faintly and nodded as she motioned for him to go inside. As they walked up the stairs towards the bunkroom he said "Ok, thanks, I'll just be real q-" he stopped talking. Then said "It didn't look like this when you left it did it?"

Panda shook her head. No one was there, but it was obvious someone had been there.

Beds were flung apart, and clothes thrown all over the place. Peoples pesessions were piled up in the middle of the room. Panda looked around briefly, but couldn't seem to find anything missing. Then she went over to her bed, still in shock. There was a folded piece of paper on it. She opened it, and it read:

Panda, that is what they call you now isn't it? It doesn't change what you really are, and we both know it. Well, this is just a reminder. I'm back, and I'm going to get you for all you've put me through. But first I need to figure out what I'm going to do with you. Maybe I'll just do the world a favor and kill you. Your a worthless piece of trash anyways. I doubt anyone would miss you. Don't say anything to anyone, just the same. If you do, I'll kill them too.

It wasn't signed,but she didn't need for it to be. She knew who it was. She felt numb at first, and then a second later when it sunk in, she thought she was going to pass out. Andy walked over to her, "whats that?" he asked, trying to take the letter.

"Nothing" said Panda quietly, folding it up, and putting it in her pocket, "Its nothing. You'd better go, I have to get all this cleaned up before everyone gets back."

"Well what ya gonna do?"

"Do?" asked Panda "I'm gonna clean up."

"No, I mean about this, what are ya gonna do?"

"I'm gonna clean up" said Panda looking at him like he was crazy

"Aren't ya gonna tell someone?"

"Who? It was probably a joke, in fact, I think I know who did it" she said, happy that this wasn't a total lie.

"Well, at least let me help ya"

"No, you probably have things to do, you can go"

"At eight thirty on a week night? I don't think so. Come on, I'll help ya."

So they worked silently for about an hour, and when Andy left, the others still weren't home. That meant they didn't have to know, and as far as Panda was concerned, they never would.

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Panda sold papers the next day, in something of a daze. She had no idea what she should do. She definitely didn't want anyone else involved it this, that much she knew. She thought and thought, finally she sighed resolutely, her father was basically a coward, she would just have to trust that he stayed that way, and tried to at least get her when she was alone. She took his letter out of her pocket and re-read it, she didn't know why, but she had an odd feeling that it wouldn't be that way this time. "Well" she thought "I'd better be wrong"

Later that day, as was getting to be common, Andy stopped by and walked Panda over to Frankies. Panda threw herself into whatever work she could find, she didn't take breaks, she just worked, until several hours later Andy told her it was time for him to go "Coming?" he asked. "Ya worked so hard, we didn't have time to do anything. Next time, we practice first. Anyways, like I said, I'm leavin, ya comin?"

Panda looked out into the dark night sky, and got scared and started to say no. Suddenly she realized what a perfect position she would be in walking home alone. She slowly nodded, praying that her theory about her father not trying anything when she was around people held true.

They were walking along the street, the night strangely quiet. Panda stayed nervously close to Andy, something she'd never done before. Andy noticed, and knew something wasn't right with her. "Panda?"

She looked at him with a start. "Hmm?"

"Is something wrong?"

"No" she said quickly, shaking her head, and, despite herself, looking around quickly.

Andy looked around as well, and didn't see anything. "Lookin for anything in part-" he was cut off when a man drunkenly ran into them. Panda gasped unthinkingly, and grabbed Andys hand, as the man, without looking up, slowly sauntered away.

"Are you ok?" asked Andy concernedly, pulling her closer as he wrapped his other arm around her.

She nodded, as her heart started to go back to normal. Thens she realized the position she was in, and it started back up again. "I-ok, lets go" she said, suddenly trying to squirm away from him.

"You sure your ok?" he asked, not letting go.

"Yes, I'm fine"she said as she all but shoved him away, looking, if anything, worse than before.

They walked the rest of the way in scilence. When she got the the Lodging House, there was a group of people going in. She left wordlessly, entering the Lodging House with much relief, and she was shocked to realize how scared she was as well.

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She went immediately to bed, laying there, for the first time in her life, in need of something to hit. She would have loved to just attack a punching bag, but what brought her back to reality was the fact that she would probably break her wrist if she did that, and besides, where was she going to find a punching bag in the Lodging House? Becaue she certainly wasn't going anywhere. She also didn't know exactally why she wanted to hit something, she didn't feel very angry, she just felt...like she wanted to blindly hit something.

After she thought for a few more minutes, she figured it out, it just hit her upside the head, just like that, but she wished it hadn';t and she had been left in blissful ignorance. She liked Andy, she liked him a lot. She liked him too much for her own good. That brought pain, and that brought difficulty. No one loved her, she wasn't worthy of love, her father said so, right in his letter. She put her hand in her pocket to get it and read it yet again. She felt around, slowly growing more frantic. It wasn't there.

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Andy picked up the paper that fell out of Pandas pocket as she raced into the Lodging House, he tried to call her, but she wouldn't listen. He sighed, he would just have to give it to her tomorrow. He didn't know what he was thinking, scaring her like that, he had just been concerned, he tried to tell himself, but he knew that wasn't true. He had to face the fact, he was...well, he didn't know what he was in regards to her, but he knew something was going to change, it had too, he couldn't help it. Just like he couldn't help reading her letter, it was just staring up at him...He read it, and stood there in shock for a moment, then turned around, and took off at a run toward the Lodging House.

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"Can I talk ta Panda?" Andy asked the first boy he saw when he got there.

"Yeah, sure, but weren't ya just here?"

"Yeah, but I forgot something, where is she?"

"Shes upstairs, I'm goin up, ya want me ta send her down, or ya just wanna come up yourself?"

"Could ya send her down?"

"No problem" he said then to someone else "Hey! I heard dat Mush! Ya just better hope I don't catch ya!" and turned and ran up the stairs.

A couple minutes later, Panda came plodding slowly down the stairs. She didn't look very good, she was pale, and obviously upset, more upset than when she had left him.

He motioned her outside onto the porch. He looked at her as they walked out onto the steps. "Are you in trouble?"

"What?" she asked, knowing what had happened with a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach.

Sure enough, he pulled the by now familiar piece of paper out of his pocket "Whos this from?"

"No one!" she mumbled, making a grab for it.

"Ya know, ya probably shouldn't pick now to be stubborn."

"Not being stubborn, it isn't important"

"A death threat ain't important?"

"Hardly a death threat"

"Did whoever it was threaten to kill you?"

"Sorta..."

"Then its a death threat.

"I can take care of it, its fine." said Panda edging towards the door.

"Um..no, its not." said Andy incredulously, "Ya gotta call the cops or something."

She shrugged, not saying anything, and continued inching towards the door.

"Oh no ya don't!" exclaimed Andy, realizing what she was trying to do. "Ya can't do th-" he was cut off when she dove for the door, and he tackled her, knocking the wind out of both of them. He then stood up, pulling her up with him, still holding her tightly from behind, so she couldn't run away. "Remind me" he kind of coughed, getting his breath back "to teach you how to block that"

"Let go!" she said in a strong voice that suprised even herself. Then she added much more quietly "Please?"

He shook his head, and despite the seriousness of the situation, laughed "Only you would turn a demand like that into a question" He stopped, then before he knew what he was doing turned her around and said "I'm sorry, but I don't want anything happening to ya" then he kissed her, and she froze, he pulled away, and looked at her intently. He saw the look on her face, and apoligized profusely, feeling guilty.

It was then that Panda took more initative then she'd ever taken in her life. Muffling his protests, she grabbed him by the back of his head, and kissed him again. She pulled back a few moments later, and mumbled something about talking to him tomorrow. About two seconds later, reality began to sink down on her. She started to go in, then stopped "Oh no, I'm so sorry! I shouldn't have done that. I'm so sorry, I'm an awful person I just-I-I'm so sorry!" She stuttered.

"So, whats wrong with ya?" asked Quips

"Nothing" mumbled Panda, curled up into a ball on her bed.

"You don't look so good." said Quips, looking at her, slightly trembling, and under a bundle of covers. She also took in Pandas sick expression. "You're not going to throw up are you?"She asked, ever helpful.

"I hope not" said Panda through about six covers, sounding utterly unconvincing.

"Yeah, well so do I." said Quips smirking. "Cause I'm the one sitting closest to you, and I'd be the victim." she paused fo a minute. "You sure nothing's wrong?

"No"

"No, nothings wrong, or no your not sure?"

"Yeah, ok"

Quips sighed and made herself relatively comfortable on the edge of the bed, making sure not to squish the large Panda-shaped lump in the center. "Well you might as well tell me now, cause I'm gonna feel guilty if you don't. Blast my conscience! Its really starting to bug me!" She rolled her eyes. "So go ahead and spill it, cause if you don't, I just know your head is going to explode with stress, and then I'll feel even more guilty, and I'll have to go out and buy a black funeral dress. It would just be a mess, so your better off in the long run just telling me."

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