Time: A half hour after "Raven Embraced", Monday evening, Oct. 28.
In Cash's apartment over the garage, there is silence. A waiting, hushed silence, like the moment before dawn when the world is being born anew. For that is what is happening here, a mortal -- Frank Kouhanek -- has been reborn as Kindred.
Julian is calm. Seated in the arm chair by the fireplace in the bedroom, he is at least pretending to read. The book was plucked at random from the overflowing shelves in the living room, and Cash isn't quite sure if Julian is really all that interested in the "Social Fabric of Fascist Europe".
Cash, on the other hand, hasn't paced this much in *years*. Between them, Archon and Julian had very nearly broken him of the restless habit. Indeed, the Ventrue occasionally looks up and frowns as Cash re-enters the bedroom to check on Frank, laying pale and still against the black satin sheets.
Finally the still form begins to re-animate as Frank returns to consciousness. A low, soft moan issues from his throat through his parted lips, and his arms and legs shift involuntarily. Frank is coming back to life, his new life.
Cash is instantly at the bedside, relief evident in every line of his body. "Frank," he whispers gently, "Wolfling, open your eyes." He glances toward Julian, excitement and pride wash though his link with the prince, who smiles and nods.
Another moan issues forth. It is unclear whether Frank is reacting to Cash's words or just coming to. Regardless, he is very much out of it, groggily coming back from the brink of death.
Cash sits on the edge of the bed, watching his fledgling awake. He remembers plainly the disorientation, every sense screaming that something has changed, scents overwhelming, noises too loud. He lays his hand against Frank's face, "Come, my brother, awaken." He leans down and brushes a soft kiss against the moaning lips. "I know it's strange. Come on, brother."
The input to Frank's awakening Kindred senses is at first overwhelming, and he suddenly convulses once, an involuntary jerk as sensation rushes in: a voice, too loud, multiple scents powerfully overlaid. And cold, too much cold.
"I know," Cash whispers as his hands press Frank back against the bed. "Be easy, wolfling. It will pass, your mind will learn."
And his mind does learn, and processes the most important thing it will know. Sound, scent, catalogued, identified... then a sharp gasp emitted. "Cash!" Frank's eyes fly open, but immediately he has to squeeze them shut against the onslaught of colors and textures, too bright, too sharp as yet.
"I'm right here, man." The Gangrel barely breathes out the words, even whispers will sound too loud to a fledgling's suddenly sensitive ears. "Take it easy, just lie back."
Frank's hands clasp onto Cash's forearms abruptly, gripping tightly as yet another moan issues forth, then Frank begins to adjust to his new senses enough to react properly to his sire's words and presence. Automatically he locks in on his lifeline - Cash's scent, the feel of his skin under his hands, his voice and touch. "Cash..." Frank sighs deeply. His eyelids flutter, then he risks opening his eyes again, though narrowed, still adjusting. He looks up into the face of his sire, at his anxious expression... and more.
"Yeah, man, welcome back." Cash smiles gently.
Frank blinks, astounded by the complex emotions on Cash's face as he gazes back down at him: excitement, pride... love... Frank swallows in reaction, a bit nervously, then tastes a remnant of Cash's blood still in the back of his mouth. He gasps a little in wonder. "You... we did it..." he manages to say.
"Oh, yeah, that we did." Cash replies. The naked joy on his sire's face surprises Frank.
A smile spreads over the new Gangrel's face, an answering thrill. "Sire..." he breathes fervently. He has been longing to call Cash that. "You did good, wolf, thanks. Gods, I feel strange."
Cash drops his head, resting his forehead against Frank's. He inhales deeply, entranced for a moment by his changed scent, more coppery now, but still recognizable as his. "My childe." The elder Gangrel pulls back reluctantly. "Yeah, the changes have started in you, you already smell Kindred. It'll feel weird for a while yet."
Frank begins to relax a little, letting his system sort things out. He knows there are worse changes to come, but for now, he is content.
Cash leans in. "So proud of you, wolfling," he whispers. "You were so brave." Cash's lips taste the now cool lips beneath him, lips that an hour ago had been mortal warm.
The words of pride, the touch of his sire's lips, serve to hearten Frank in his changing. "Thanks, man," he murmurs, his grasp easing into a light caress before his arms relax back to the bed.
Julian stands and comes over to the bedside, smiling in pride at them both. "Welcome back, Frank."
Glancing over, Frank smiles wanly at the Ventrue. "Thanks for being here, Julian," he murmurs.
"I was honored." The Ventrue prince reaches out and touches Cash's head. [You did well, little one. I need to go, though.]
Cash glances up at his lover and prince. "Thank you, Julian." [For everything, for being here, for my childe.] Another echo of joy in the link between the prince and the Gangrel primogen. Cash gently squeezes Frank's hand before moving to get off the bed.
Julian takes the opportunity offered by Cash's movement to lean over and kiss Frank, a kiss of welcome more than passion.
Frank receives the kiss with wonder, grateful that Julian stayed, awed that the whole thing happened at all. His reality is very much still sinking in.
Cash murmurs, "Frank, I'll just walk Julian out. You stay put, relax. okay?"
"K," Frank responds, closing his eyes again for a bit.
Julian precedes Cash from the room. The two long time lovers share a quick hug and a rather chaste kiss. "Thanks again for being here, Julian. Tell Morgaine and Sonny everything went well, please?"
"Cash, call Daedalus if you need anything. I'll be at the paper, but I'll leave my cell phone on. Morgaine and Sonny are just over in the main house." Julian covers the bases as Cash nods.
[Lover, we'll be fine. I have plenty of blood, *this* part I've done before.] Julian catches a brief mental glimpse of Sasha feeding from Cash's arm.
"Then I'll check back with you later, mia vita." Julian heads down the stairs as Cash turns to the kitchen for a bottle of blood.
A stab of pain suddenly knifes through Frank's changing body. [CASH!] he shouts in their abruptly opened mental link as a cry erupts from his throat in shock. One stab turns into many as his metamorphosing tissues scream for blood.
[GODS!!] The pain echoes down the infant link between the two Gangrels. Cash bolts across the living room and into the bedroom. "Frank, Frank, take it easy, okay??"
Frank is already curled into a ball on his side, clutching his arms to himself in agony. He tries to speak, but only a croak comes out.
"Yeah, I know, man, I know. Hang on." Cash slips onto the bed, pulling Frank's upper body to him. "Man, you need more blood." But mere words are not making it through the pain. [Frank, my brother, you need to feed, you need blood.]
The fledgling shakes his head once, then nods, understanding what is happening. The pain is too intense for him to thrill at Cash's voice now firmly in his mind at last... there will be time later to enjoy that new communion between them. [Hurts, wolf...]
[Blood helps, drink from me.] Cash pushes the white silk up his arm. With a swift talon, he opens the big vessel in his forearm. [Drink, wolfling.]
Frank takes Cash's forearm in his hands and immediately puts his mouth to the wound and sucks blood into his mouth. Cash's blood, the rich, smooth and wild blood of his sire, fills him with calm, relieving the stresses on his changing tissues.
The elder Gangrel strokes the younger's hair with his free hand. [That's it, Frank, so good.] Even this Kiss is ecstasy, and Cash deliberately lets some of his pleasure echo back to Frank as the fledgling Kindred drinks.
[Yes, so good... God, your blood tastes so incredible...] Frank responds, a deeply satisfied noise coming from his throat in answer to his sire's pleasure. In moments he is wonderfully sated for now, licking Cash's forearm clean and relaxing against him with a sigh.
Cash cradles his newborn childe against him, settling back against the headboard of the bed. "Rest while you can, mine own. We've a ways to go yet."
The new infusion of blood - [Cash's blood, my *sire's* blood...] - helps the new fledgling return to some kind of equilibrium. The hunger recedes for a bit and he is content, very content just to rest against Cash for now.
Frank settles against his sire, his arm lightly over his chest. "Cash, can I share a story with you? I mean... I know Gangrels are storytellers... I just happen to have one, I guess."
"Yeah, we love long tales. Our gathers are full of dances and storytelling." Cash settles down and cuddles Frank closer. [This man is just so RIGHT for the Gangrels. I am so glad.] Cash thinks happily, letting his joy and pride slide gently down the still new link to his childe.
"It's a short one," Frank replies, grinning with matching delight. He feels a deep, happy thrill at what he senses from Cash, and hope that his sire feels his own contentment, happiness as well. Again the swell of love rises within him for the Gangrel primogen. "What little raising I got, came from my paternal grandmother, a Coast Salish Indian, as was my grandfather."
"Ah, that explains something, I was wondering about. You didn't freak out when you saw us in wolf form. I wondered why, impressed the hell out of Eddie, I heard. But Native American tales are full of animal people." Cash settles in to enjoy this. The Gangrel have walked for a long time among the Native peoples, in fact, by some account, the Gangrel were the first clan in the New World, their wandering ways bringing them to the newly discovered shores.
Frank makes an ironic noise. "Well, wait until you hear this. I wonder if she knew something back then... anyway, the story is called 'The Raven and the Wolf'."
Cash perks up at the mention of "Raven". [I wonder if Frank knows that the Raven was his spirit animal as a mortal?]
Frank doesn't notice the reaction. "Okay, here goes. Raven was tired. Bone-weary tired. He had tricks to play and no desire to play them, not anymore. One day he was far from the village when he met Wolf-brother. Wolf-brother asked him why he was not playing tricks, so Raven told him.
"'I'm tired. I don't think I want to play any tricks any more.' 'But isn't that what Ravens do?' asked Wolf-brother. 'I don't know, I just don't want to,' the tired Raven replied.
"Wolf-brother did not believe Raven. 'You're playing a trick right now! You're trying to confuse me!'
"Raven assured Wolf that he had no such intention. 'Just leave me alone, please,' he pleaded.
"But the Wolf-brother, who, it must be known, was young and foolish, would not believe that the Raven, at that very moment, was trying to play some sort of trick on the Wolf. Enraged, Wolf-brother ate the Raven. 'Now play your tricks on me, Trickster!' Wolf-brother shouted, and left, leaving Raven-feathers behind.
"Back at the village, the animals were asking, 'Where is Raven?' 'Have you seen Raven?'
"Wolf-brother came back to the village. 'Have you seen Raven?' asked Grandmother Squirrel.
"Wolf-brother sneered. 'Yes, I have seen that Trickster! And he tried to play a mean trick on me! So I ate him!'
"Grandmother Squirrel nodded sadly. 'Well, you are right, Wolf-brother, a trick has been played on you, but not by the Raven.'
"'Not the Raven?' Wolf-brother cried indignantly, 'What trick, then?'
"Pointing, Grandmother Squirrel showed Wolf-brother a she-wolf suckling a new-born wolf cub. In the nest cushioning mother and child could be seen a few black feathers. 'Here's the trick, Wolf-brother. You see... Raven has been reborn a Wolf.'"
Frank closes his eyes when the retelling is done. He has never understood what the story meant, but has always felt it meant something for him somehow.
Cash throws back his head at the punchline of the story and howls with laughter. "OH Frank, that's wonderful... You don't know HOW wonderful. I *told* you that it was fated for you to be Gangrel. Let me tell YOU a story."
Surprised, Frank levers up to peer at the other man. "Yeah? It doesn't make any sense to me... except that I was reborn a Kindred... what, you mean I was some kind of Raven?" He looks at his sire skeptically, typically Frank.
"There is a Shaman in the city, he's not Kindred, not yet." Cash thinks Frank may have met Blair, he knows Jim is in the exchange program with Sonny and Frank, but Julian promised to keep their secret, so he mentions no names. "He had a vision that he told to Julian, and me and Thorne, the wizard... in it there were wolves with silver eyes and one of the wolves was being berated by a Raven."
"Berated?" Frank asks, bewildered. "What do you mean, 'berated', and are you insinuating I was the Raven?"
"Well, at the time, you were still pretty angry at Julian, my wolfling. The Shaman says we take on the forms of our spirit guides in his visions. Thorne says it's a 'place', the spirit plane, but I only get glimpses in dreams or visions." Cash chuckles again. "Raven is very wise and not only a trickster. Why else do the Pacific coast people revere him so much?"
"True," Frank replies with a grin. "Well, I hope I've left my 'berating' days behind, especially of my new, pardon the pun, 'Kindred'. So this Shaman... he's mortal? You said he's not Kindred yet..."
"I think he might make the same choice you did, Frank. His gifts led him to us, just like your curiosity did. He's fascinated by the Kindred, studies us like some kind of research project." Cash grins at the thought of watching Dr. Blair Sandburg study the Kindred as an anthropologist studies an new culture. "He's even more curious than you, fledgling." Cash reaches down and flicks his fingers against Frank's chin in a gesture reminiscent of the caress in the park a few days ago.
Frank captures Cash's fingers in his, presses them to his lips. "Let's see, mortal, studies the Kindred, curious... sounds an awful lot like a certain anthropologist hanging around Detective James Ellison." Frank winks at his sire, pleased to have been handed a last piece to that puzzle.
"Oops," Cash grins back, "My brother, you are not a detective for nothing! But don't let on that you know that they know. You are now in the exact same position that Sonny was in."
The Gangrel fledgling rolls his eyes. "Oh, great, well, I guess I deserved that. You know, come to think of it, Jim Ellison said I was in danger of my life... the night of the Conclave, when I called him to ask him to take my cases. Just remembered that now. Strange..." He shrugs. "I guess Blair had some kind of vision..." He pictures the earthy young bohemian, such a stark contrast to the tall, well-built Ellison. [Yeah, can see that one as a Shaman, all right. Huh.]
"Jim Ellison," Cash muses. "You're gonna be working close with him?"
Frank sobers, seeing that this is serious business. Now that he's Kindred, he has to watch what he says a lot more carefully. "Yeah, afraid so. Don't worry, I'm long over my vampire story days, Cash. That little cause is so much smoke now."
The Gangrel primogen smiles. "Yeah, you'd better be prepared to take a little ribbing on that one, my brother. But I'm more worried about Ellison. He *knows* Kindred somehow. Don't be surprised if he pegs that you've changed."
Suddenly, Cash is aware of the rise of the Hunger, sated as he still is on Frank's blood. Cash quickly identifies his fledgling as the cause. [Frank, feel *that*? You need to feed before it starts to hurt.]
Frank is already doubling over, folding into the side of his sire. [My veins... feel like burning...]
"Easy, man, if you feed when you first feel it, it's not that bad." Cash snags one of the bottles that Julian brought up earlier, the cork loosened. "Here, man, you gotta sit up and drink. This is mortal blood, it'll feed you better than Kindred right now. Nourishment, not passion and power, is what you need next."
Cash gently pulls Frank to a sitting position, supporting his fledgling's cramping body against his chest, one arm behind Frank's back. "Here, drink."
The new Gangrel leans on his sire, accepting the bottle, though his unsteady hands keep Cash's hands helping to hold it. Shakily he gets the opening to his mouth, and tilts it up. The blood - his first taste of mortal blood as Kindred - is smooth, nourishing... Frank realizes with a rush and something of an inner gulp that this is his FOOD now.
It's a powerful feeling, and one concept he hasn't fully grappled with yet, that the most nourishing thing he can consume now is the life-blood of a mortal. And it tastes so good that he could glut on it if he didn't know any better... and with Cash holding him and watching him like a hawk, he does know better.
[Kindred now, Kouhanek, you WANTED this,] Frank muses as his system calms down again with the influx of blood. [Well, not THIS, but you want the life, you gotta drink the drink. Live with it, man.]
Pleased at Frank's calm acceptance of his new reality, Cash watches as he drinks. [It's good, isn't it.]
[Oh, wolf, I had no idea,] Frank whispers back in their link, still incredulous that they can do that now. He finishes the long draught, and brings the bottle back down, lets Cash take it. [Incredible...] Already he feels so much better, the cramps easing.
Cash hefts the bottle, there's still a glass or two in it. "You're doing good, man. You got better control than some already. You stopped drinking when you'd had enough. Some fledgling can't. I can tell you lots of stuff, man, but control you need from *inside*, 'cause I won't always be around to impose it on you."
"Common sense, besides, I can feel your eyes burning a hole in me, watching me drink." Frank sighs. "God, I could drink the whole thing, though. Still hungry, man." Then he cringes a bit. "Impose... I never want you to have to do that."
"That's one reason for the link. If push comes to shove, I *can* dive into your mind and pull you out of a frenzy. But I don't think we'll ever need to go there." Cash uncurls from around Frank, "I'm gonna go get you a mug, no reason not to be civilized about this. You'll like it warm too. Come on into the kitchen?"
Cash's casual chatter seems odd to Frank, who is still unnerved about drinking mortal blood, still adjusting to his new reality. [Why does drinking mortal blood seem so totally weird but drinking Kindred blood seems so natural? What's the matter with you, Kouhanek, did you really think they weren't vampires after all? Heh, you're ONE, too, now...]
"Yeah, sure... warm? Ah, okay..." Frank shakes his head, wrapping his mind around the idea, getting his head where it belongs on this. "Give me time, wolf, not used to this..."
"I know, man. But you are doing so very well." Cash hops off the bed and offers a hand to Frank. "Really, you are. Much better than I did."
Frank accept the assistance, especially when he realizes immediately upon getting up that he is quite unsteady. He fights a wave of dizziness and sags against Cash a little. "Um, thanks... hope I can keep this up. Don't want to worry you."
The elder Gangrel easily supports the other's weight. "What happens, happens, my friend. Don't have to hide anything from me, you know. What you feel is what you feel. And what you need now is the rest of this bottle." Cash slowly leads the way into the living room and over to the fireplace. "Hang here for a second, I'll bring you back what you need."
Reluctantly letting go of him, Frank sinks down onto the pillows in front of the fireplace, still nested there from his Embrace, he notes poignantly. When Cash moves away, Frank feels a pang of loss. He feels such a strong NEED for his sire, need for his physical presence, need for the link now opened between them. It's his lifeline right now.
[Easy, my brother, I'm not going anywhere. You'll be able to feel me no matter where I am.] Cash reassures him as he fills two mugs and places them in the microwave for a time. Coming back with the warmed mugs of pure blood in his hands, he gracefully settles in beside his new fledgling, shoulders rubbing against each other as he hands one across.
[Need you...] Frank murmurs wistfully, grateful for the physical contact again as he accepts the other mug. Then he looks down into the slightly steaming fluid. [Wolf, I never thought about drinking warm *mortal* blood. Take some getting used to.]
[Wolfling, that it does. At least you're not tossing your cookies. That's what I did, when I realized what Stevie'd just poured down my throat. And shit, was *he* pissed at me. And trust me, Daedalus' stock tastes better than a half drunk mortal bum.]
Cash clinks his mug against Frank's. The younger man notices that his mug is just a normal green Starbuck's mug, but Cash's is black and has a tombstone and the legend on it: "If you think the dead don't come back to life, you should be around here at quitting time."
[Kindred humor, I suppose,] Frank thinks to himself, smiling in spite of himself, or maybe *at* himself. "Bon appetit," he murmurs, wondering how the hell he got himself into a Far Side cartoon, but minding less at each passing moment. He takes a swig from his mug, and smiles again when his immediate reaction is to sigh with pleasure, as if it were indeed a good cup of, ah, joe.
[The mug...] Cash snickers, "This was a 'thanks for working here' gift from a guy I did some work for on the road. He never did figure out why I just about split my sides laughing when he gave it to me."
"Sorry you had a hard time of it, man," Frank adds, sighing after he takes another swallow. "It means so much to me that you are willing to be here for me like this."
"It's sure not the Gangrel way, my brother. But it's better this way, to treat you more like the Ventrue treat their fledglings."
[Not the Gangrel way... strange,] Frank reflects, taking another drink from the cooling blood. He's drinking now without thinking about WHAT he's drinking, just letting himself enjoy the taste of it.
Cash sets his own, almost untouched mug aside. He had really only brought it to make Frank more comfortable about drinking in front of him.
Frank still feels some internal tremors, the Change still working its way through him, but the blood eases the pain of it, as well as eases the hunger his starved tissues feel.
Cash slips an arm around his new childe, stroking a comforting hand back and forth in the small of Frank's back. No matter how brave a front that the detective is putting on, Cash can tell from the dull ache in their bond that Frank is by no means done with this odyssey. "Wolfling, how do you feel now?" he asks gently.
The fledgling leans back slightly onto the hand caressing him, holding the mug in two hands in his lap. "I... hurt... even after drinking this. I'm cold... yet my veins are on fire, just bearable." To his dismay, his voice breaks at this last, and he realizes he's been putting on a pretty good act.
[Thought so, hoped not.] Cash thinks to himself. "I know, wolfling, I know. Pretty damn miserable. But it will get better. It's like a bad case of the flu, you just have to endure it."
Flu... Frank hears Cash's words, but all he can think about is that no flu bug ever felt this bad. How can he feel cold and heat all at the same time? The heat is the most uncomfortable, for it feels like the blood he's just consumed has turned into fire...
Suddenly the fire sharply intensifies, and Frank leaps to his feet, knocking Cash to the side, his empty mug rolling a few feet away on the floor. His face becomes a twisted, angry mask as he rubs frenetically at his arms. [Fire, I'm on fire!] Frank panics, sure that something is desperately wrong, fearing his body is rejecting the change.
Cash lands on his rump, startled. "Frank, what the hell?" Cash climbs to his feet, quickly, baffled by the panic and anger rolling off Frank. The elder Gangrel grabs for his fledgling's arms. "FRANK!! Look at me!"
The new Kindred twists away, evading his sire's grasp. "Fire in my veins, shit, I can't stand it!" His eyes are wild, brown with hard glints of silver. "Something's wrong, I must be reverting, it's not taking - oh, SHIT!" He grabs his arms to himself and dances away, the agony in his veins unbearable.
[Fuck,] Cash growls to himself, [I was afraid this was going too easy.] "Frank," he tries a gentle, soothing voice, "hey, man, it's taking just fine, and that's the problem, that's what you are feeling. Let me hold you."
But Frank, driven to a little madness because of the agony in his body, throws his arms out to shove Cash away from him, and in the process, manages to land a punch to the throat, sending the elder sprawling. "It's no good, this isn't TAKING, it's burning!"
On his ass for the second time in as many minutes, Cash decides logic isn't getting him anywhere. He gets up again, eyeing his fledgling. While Cash knows Frank isn't fighting "him" but the pain of the Becoming, Gangrels as a clan are prone to frenzy and that's the last thing Cash wants for Frank's first day as Kindred and from the feelings in their link, the newborn could step over that edge. "You *have* to listen to me, Frank!" Cash snaps as he moves determinedly toward the panicked detective.
Frank shakes his head, unable to listen anymore. To his sire's horror, the fledgling extends a rudimentary talon, enough to do damage. "I have to release the fire!" Frank gasps, panting, and with two swift strokes, he slices one arm open, then another. His arm starts to come up, ready to open his own throat as well.
"OH SHIT!!" Cash very nearly flies across the remaining space and grabs the blood slick wrists. The two Gangrel, chest to chest, topple back against one of the big armchair, which being Mission oak, tips over but does not collapse, spilling them onto the floor away from the fireplace.
The elder Kindred wraps his legs determinedly around his fledgling's legs and pins him on his back to the floor. Blood is spilling over Cash's hands, the scent hauntingly like his own blood, as he pins Frank's wrists over the prone man's head. "Frank, look at me!!! STOP THIS!!" The last words are punctuated by a mental "shove" against Frank's mindless panic.
Frank struggles uselessly against the superior strength of the older Gangrel, then freezes as his sire's thought blasts through the frenetic, panicked churning in his mind. He looks at Cash finally, his eyes wide and wild, breathing hard.
"Back with me, man?" Cash asks, now sending as much calm as his own adrenaline rush will let him, but still keeping a firm grip on the captive wrists.
But the fire hasn't lessened, and the pain has driven Frank literally crazy. Something in his befogged mind tells him irrationally that perhaps he can stop the reverting if he drinks from Cash again. "Need... BLOOD!" With a burst of strength, Frank lunges up, breaking Cash's hold on him. He grabs his sire by the back of the head with one hand and sinks newly sprouted fangs into Cash's throat, mad to get at his blood again.
Frank's unpracticed lunge misses the big veins and arteries, but Cash still growls at the attack. His own control, while better than some Gangrel's thanks to Archon's heavy hand, is thinner than usual, but he tamps down his own Beast within and allows his fledgling to suckle for a long minute. Then... [Enough, Frank.]
The rich Gangrel blood courses down Frank's throat, ice for his fires, but though he starts to calm physically, his mind is still roiling with confusion, shock from his frightening reactions.
The elder Gangrel realizes that his fledgling isn't going to be able to stop on his own. Cash's hand grips Frank's hair and again the sire "pushes" along their mental link. [I said *enough*, Frank.]
The mental nudge, carefully sharp and firmly leaving no room for avoidance, breaks the madness, shocking Frank more effectively now that the fire is beginning to abate. He pulls his fangs from Cash, just now realizing what he's even doing. Frank stares, abashed. "C...Cash?" Then he sees the blood on his arms, the wounds on his sire's throat. His head clunks back down onto the floor beneath him as he settles, wary and fearful of whatever just happened.
Cash regains his hold on Frank's wrists, just as a precaution. After all, he had thought that the youngster was coherent a bit ago and gotten his throat torn into for that mistake. "Yeah, man, I'm here. Good thing too, you're too young to be healing from what you just tried to do to yourself." Cash straddles Frank's chest and, keeping first one arm pinned and then the other, inspects his captive's forearms, the slashes are pink lines at the shallow ends, and he licks at the deeper places, just to be sure they close. "Ruined THAT shirt, you did," he comments wryly at the sight of the tattered gabardine.
Upset, Frank pulls against Cash's grip, confused about what just happened and why. [I just bit him and he's worried about my shirt??] he thinks, still frightened by the changes in his body. "Let me go," he mutters, miserable.
"Not a chance, wolfling." Cash wiggles down to straddle Frank's waist, leaning to pin the fledgling's hands on either side of his head. "You need to listen and this way I'm sure I have your undivided attention. I know you are scared, I can *feel* it." Cash sends a wash of gentle reassurance down their link.
"What just now happened to you is called a frenzy. The Gangrels are prone to them if they are hurt, or frightened, or hungry. You are all three. You didn't hurt me, but I will NOT let you harm yourself or others, no matter what. Understand?"
Frank is listening, but isn't calming yet. "I... frenzied? Oh, man, I was clean out of my mind... I don't even remember..." He closes his eyes, shaking his head again. "I was burning on the inside..."
"I'm gonna let you up, okay? We can talk about this..."
"I didn't mean to bite you," Frank says hastily. "I still feel the burning... what if it happens again?"
"We'll deal with it together, man. That's what I'm here for. You feel burning, Sasha felt cold, everybody's different. There aren't any words to prepare you for it." Cash gently releases Frank and (rather reluctantly) moves off him.
He keeps hold of one hand, though, and when he rises to his feet, he pulls Frank up with him. "I tried to warn you, man, but there's just no way to know how anybody will react."
Frank sags heavily against Cash for a minute, very unsteady. "What... did I do? I don't even remember..." He has never felt this lost, this betrayed by his body.
The older man easily supports his weight, debating what to say. Moving back to the fire, he settles them on the sofa, Cash in the corner, one leg tucked against the back and the other foot on the floor and Frank sitting facing forward, perpendicular to and against him. "You tried to open up the veins in your arms, and your throat, man. You probably would have survived it, but let's not go there again, okay? Then after, of course, you were hungry, and I was right there. That part, your biting me, wasn't frenzy, but instinct. Your body knows that to heal, my blood is best."
"Oh, God," Frank breathes, running a hand over his face. He glances down at his arms, wondering. "No 'tried', I did open my veins... God, I was raving nuts..." Then he pauses to look his sire in the eye, fully meeting his gaze at last. "I can still taste your blood... thanks for bringing me back."
"Always be there for you, man." Cash soothes, touching his cheek gently.
Frank runs his hand up along the hand touching his cheek. "I've never been so frightened... if it weren't for our link, I might have really done something stupid... you called me back, shook me out of it." Still unsettled, Frank runs his other hand along Cash's thigh, needing the physical connection with his sire after the scare.
Cash, too, was shaken by the sudden violence. He reaches out for Frank's shoulders and pulls him in for a hug. "I won't let that happen. I saw a fledgling commit suicide once, not gonna happen with you."
The suggestion pulls a shudder out of Frank and he gratefully settles into the embrace, running his arm around his sire's back. "I'm sorry I struggled... I know you're trying to help me, man. I can't believe I went berserk like that."
"Hey, it happens, the Beast slips loose sometimes. It's like you said once, the 'wild' just gets away from you. We feel *everything* a bit more. That's anger and fear and jealousy and all the negative shit as well as passion and pleasure and all the good stuff. But it's our job to teach you so that you let it loose when you want to, in a fight or in passion, and can rein it back in when you need to, too."
Frank unconsciously caresses Cash's back, trying to process what his sire is teaching him. "You do that on PURPOSE? Oh, wow... well, I can see when you might... as long as you can control it. Gods, Cash, I have so far to go... I feel like my body is my enemy."
The other Gangrel rumbles a pleased noise in the back of his throat at the caress. "Frank, lean in here and smell, center here." Cash touches the hollow of his own throat. "Pretty soon you adjust, it won't go on like this forever. You need to focus on the new delights, don't keep looking for the dark. It finds you without you looking for it."
The fledgling complies, shifting so his nose is tucked in against Cash's throat. He inhales his sire's scent, and for the first time, realizes that the scent is not only sharper, but he can practically READ it. And he's reading "Cash" emphatically there, as well as the concern and caring echoed in their link. Indeed the scent allows him to center, track in to his lifeline, his sire.
Cash strokes the chestnut hair snuggling in under his chin. "I hadn't noticed that before, you have a lot of red in your hair, in the firelight it shines. You are all fire and air, all passion and emotions, wolfling." Cash murmurs softly.
"Passion, yeah," Frank snorts against the other. "I guess it's my curse in life as well as my blessing." Then he straightens to look at Cash again for a moment. "I have brown hair..."
"Not anymore you don't. It's definitely got a reddish cast to it, I don't think it's just the firelight." Cash smoothes some of that hair off Frank's forehead, "You had silver eyes a bit ago, too. I think your fears about the Change 'not taking' are pretty groundless. Talons and teeth, too. Wolfling, you are definitely Kindred."
This affirmation settles Frank's beleaguered mind more than he could have imagined. "Oh, wow... I really have changed..." His eyes take on some of the joy again from earlier. "Wolf, I think I'd like to do as you suggested earlier... concentrate on the new delights." He ducks his head, suddenly shy. [Sire, if we could explore those... together...]
Delighted at the unexpected initiative from Frank, Cash chuckles, a near purr in his chest. He reaches out and slips fingertips under Frank's chin, tipping his face up. [Delights like this?] he gently teases as he kisses Frank.
[Oh, yeah... and more,] Frank sighs back in their link, relieved and very pleased to be kissing his cherished Cash again. The ache in his veins recedes in lieu of the ache in his heart for this man.
Just as he marveled in his enhanced sense of smell, now he marvels again in his sense of taste. Cash's mouth is like ambrosia, nearly as delicious as his blood, and Frank settles contentedly into tasting and exploring it anew, this familiar and loved mouth that is so new, too.
The kiss goes on and on, the two Gangrels content for the moment to indulge their senses, Cash lets his pleasure at Frank's kiss flow through their link, and ups the ante by hinting at a rising desire.
Frank is astounded at this familiar but so new experience, Kindred kissing Kindred, the enhanced feel and taste mingled with the incredible mental touching in their link. Frank feels a rush of warmth, not the painful fire, loving Cash all the more, then finally thrilling at the spark of desire he can read in the other.
Finally Cash pulls back just a touch, to look into silver lit eyes. Entranced at the vision of Frank as he is changed, Cash can't help exclaiming, "Gods, Frank, look at yourself." He gestures to the mirror over the fireplace mantle.
The fledgling looks askance at his sire, then reluctantly leaves his arms to stand up and look in the indicated mirror. Sure enough, his eyes are glowing softly silver. Kindred eyes. Frank gasps a little bit, awed.
Cash comes to stand beside him, slipping an arm around his waist, in the mirrored glass their glances meet and Cash lets his own eyes light. "Welcome to the night, my childe."
Frank gazes at their images, his arm going around the other as well. "I didn't tell you... just remembered, damn it... about Alexandra." Frank turns and goes into Cash's arms, needing him close.
At the sudden change of mood and topic, Cash tenses a bit, gathering Frank in close. "Yeah?"
The dread of the might-have-been leaks into their link. "I saw her, Cash, when I died. She came from the Light."
The elder Gangrel feels the slight shivers and the smell of fear is suddenly strong about his childe. "And..." Cash prompts gently.
Frank presses his face against the side of his sire's. "I was confused, couldn't hear you. I thought she wanted me to go to her, reach her to help me into the Light." Frank's arms tighten around him.
Cash shivers himself at that and his grip on the younger man tightens almost painfully. "No," he breathes out, only now realizing that he could have lost this fledgling.
"I was wrong... Cash, she came to turn me away, tell me the Light wasn't for me." Frank presses his lips momentarily against Cash's jaw, kissing him in reverence and love. "She told me to hear you calling me... and then I did. I heard you, Cash. You pulled me back." He shudders once, remembering.
"I am so glad that you came back, mine own." Cash whispers. [Thank you, goddess,] the wisp of a prayer shared with Frank.
[And I'm so glad I'm yours,] Frank returns fervently, moving his head back just enough to find Cash's mouth again, needing more of that incredible taste. [Sire...]
[Yes, oh yeah.] Cash happily dives into that kiss, the joy at Frank's successful Embrace once again singing though his mind.
It amazes him that only days ago the man in his arms was a near stranger, considered to be an enemy, in fact. Now his scent and taste are so familiar and a bit of his very mind is wrapped deeply into Cash's soul.
Feeling Cash snug in his arms, against his body, kissing him, wrapping his tongue around Cash's... Frank considers how Alexandra's "Wild", the taste of her blood those months ago, has conspired to lead him into this life, Kindred life, and more importantly, into the arms of this man, already his brother and most certainly his sire and maker. It feel so natural, like coming home.
[This is home, wolf, right here in your arms,] Frank thinks to him in their link, still awed by being able to reach him that way. He caresses Cash's back, feeling him even as he enjoys his mouth. [My sire... love you.]
Cash hands roam, nearly unconsciously, down Frank's back, coming to rest in the small of the other man's back, fingers cupped around the upper curve of his ass. Frank's declaration of love startles him a little. The man who has been gypsy tough, war hero, bitter drifter, hardened fighter -- Cash has a hard time admitting people to his heart, but Frank is making his way inside the Gangrel primogen's defenses.
[Home's a very good place to be, wolfling.] Cash thinks, [Frank, to me home is right here. This place, these people...]
The hands on his lower back, placed just SO, sends a pulse of desire through Frank's body, sparking alive other urges waiting their turn to surge forth. Frank pulls off Cash's mouth with a gasp, his head dropping to his sire's shoulder, his lips beginning to kiss at his neck, lick where he'd so recently fed.
"Oh yeah, " Cash breathes, nearly reverently, arousal sparking along his nerves. [I like that.] He pulls Frank closer, rubbing against him, slipping insistent hands further down to cup Frank's ass.
Frank, emitting a little moan against Cash's neck as the other's hands move lower, can't help but grind his growing erection against Cash. Again, it is the call of the Wild, the passion in his being now multiplied in Kindred form. Frank is suddenly very hungry, and not for blood, the sexual urges mounting.
Cash begins to respond, pushing his groin into Frank, but a dim echo of Hunger catches his attention. Still sated on Frank's mortal blood, he knows instantly that it's coming from Frank through their link, and he pulls away reluctantly. "Frank, in the middle of the Becoming isn't the best time to start as lovers." Cash's frustration is evident in the rough growl of his voice. "And you'll need to feed - soon. Can you feel the Hunger rising? Always pay attention to it and feed as soon as you can possibly manage. Don't ever ignore it."
"MAN," Frank growls back, his eyes bright silver with lust, "Fuck, hell of a time to give me another lesson..." But he indeed feels Hunger underlying the powerful sexual arousal. "Okay, yeah, I feel it." Frustrated, Frank turns away, goes and picks up the coffee mug from where he'd thrown it earlier. "This is so hard..."
"Wolfling, come." Cash sits down on the pillows. "Drink from me instead. Yeah, you need mortal blood eventually, but this will help calm you." The growl gentles into something closer to a purr.
Frank looks toward Cash, feeling a rush of gratitude. He sets the coffee mug on the mantle and drops back down onto the pillows beside Cash. "You'd really let me... again?" His voice is small, incredulous.
Cash puts his arms around his childe, drawing him in to rest against the elder Gangrel's chest. "I promised you, 'whatever you need'. You react better right now to my blood than the mortal blood, we'll go with what works."
"Wolf, ah... from your arm or..." Frank gingerly puts fingertips to Cash's neck, hoping against hope that he'd actually be allowed to feed there. He knows he was in a frenzy when he did before, and that it just might not be the thing to do normally.
Cash tilts his head to the side, invitingly. "Any of the major blood vessels will do, Frank. Neck, elbow, wrist, groin...." His voice trails off, and he give his childe a lust-filled wink. "Come here, wolfling." Cash grasps Frank's hand and guides the fingertips to the pulsepoint. "My pulse is still strong 'cause I fed so well when I Embraced you. A mortal will feel just like this. You want the artery, not the big vein, the blood's fresher, full of nutrients."
The wink sparks a nervous grin in Frank, and he groans, squeezing Cash's hand. "Don't DO that to me, man, not when I'm like this... okay..." He touches his sire's throat, awed to feel a pulse. "God, your heart *is* beating..."
"Your blood in me, my childe. Just nick the artery with your teeth, try not to bite *through* it," Cash instructs him patiently. "When you've had enough blood, lick it to make the wound close. Always do that, for the sake of the vessel you are drinking from, and for the Masquerade. Oh, and brush your teeth, just like after a mortal meal, we can't get blood-borne diseases, but we can be 'carriers' between mortals if we aren't careful."
Frank nods, and awkwardly shifts so that he is leaning over Cash, bending to his throat, much like when Cash bent to his in this very place to Embrace him. His fingers still trace the artery slowly. "My blood... in your veins... oh, God, Cash..." He lifts his eyes to meet the gaze of his sire, watching him patiently and so caring, then Frank moves his mouth into position.
"Feel the pulse under your lips, then move just a little off it. Then just focus on the scent of the blood, and the feel of the pulse, your fangs will drop by instinct." [Go on, you can't hurt me,] Cash urges his suddenly shy fledgling.
Carefully following his instructions, Frank concentrates on the pulse and the scent of blood, his eyes silvering again and his new fangs dropping into place. With a soft exhale, the fledgling bites into his sire's artery, then sighs deeply as blood fills his mouth. Pleasure flushes through him wonderfully at the taste of Cash's rich ambrosia.
[Sire... your blood heals me...] he breathes into their link, astounded as before.
Cash's free hand slips into Frank's hair, an unconscious reversal of their roles in the Embrace. The ecstasy of the Kiss is a little less sharp for Cash for he doesn't dare surrender to it fully, but still pleasure fills him. Frank's awe and Cash's own bliss echo back and forth between them. Cash opens the link between them to let Frank taste the pleasure that the fledgling's Kiss bestows.
The Hunger indeed calms within Frank, gentled by the lush offering of his sire, and the pleasure vibrating between them in the Kiss is immensely welcome.
[Frank, have you had enough? Don't get lost in the pleasure.]
As Cash calls to him in their link, Frank immediately stiffens, realizing he must stop drinking. [Sorry, Sire,] he apologizes, then withdraws his fangs and licks at the wounds to close them.
[Just listen to the Hunger, wolfling. You didn't take too much. Even if I were mortal, that's not much more than a blood donation would take.] "Feels good, Frank," Cash purrs at the rough caress of the tongue against his neck. "Very good."
Frank sighs deeply against the other Gangrel's neck. [Feel like I need so much more... my veins don't burn, but they still ache. I still ache all over...]
"Blood alone won't help that, wolfling. It's gonna take time, but it's better this time than last, every wave will be easier." Cash wraps his arms around his fledgling, Frank now nearly lying on his chest. [Let me see if this can help.]
The fledgling settles in gratefully in his sire's arms, trying to be patient. When Cash touches his mind, he yields to it, trusting in his maker.
Cash "reaches" across their link, trying to pull some of the pain back to himself. Not for the first time, he wishes he had a link with Daedalus, who had told him verbally of the technique but could not 'show' him. [Should have had him do it to Morgaine and her show me,] he growls disgustedly to himself.
Gradually, after nearly a minute, Frank is amazed to feel a... softening... of the edges of his ache, like a blurring. [Cash is doing that,] he tells himself, awed. "Oh, that's better," he sighs, untensing a little.
Cash continues to both stroke Frank's back and "soothe" him mentally. The fire crackles merrily at their feet and the CD changer clicks over to a soothing blend of woodwinds and forest sounds.
"I just... I know I have to go through all this, Cash," Frank adds in a whisper, listening to the slow, steady pulse of his sire's heart under the music in the background. "I'm so grateful... that I don't have to do this alone. Like you did. Thanks, wolf." Reverently, he places a kiss over Cash's heart.
"Best sire I can be, man. Want you for yourself, not what you can get me or to use against an enemy or as a political pawn." Cash strokes a gentling hand down Frank's back, coming to rest easily on his ass.
Something in the way Cash touches him makes Frank smile, a hint of possessiveness that he thinks he likes. "Yeah, want you plenty myself, wolf. I'm yours..." Frank stifles a groan, thinking these few first days will definitely be the longest in his life, ever.
THE END
