Cool Designs! Tape Decks! Muscular Hood Ornaments! Shotguns?

It seems that 80s vehicles had it all, and then some. So it should come as no surprise that I would follow up with a sequel to my previous article on vehicles of the 80s. Sit back and be amazed as a 250 horse powered vehicle of nostalgia slams into you, sending you full force into a pool of recognition and awesomeness. I’m not really sure what that means, so YOU KNOW this is going to be good! In addition, we have one vehicle that is way too hot for the internet, and I’d probably be jailed for displaying it in all its coolness. You know you want to check it out!

Ferrari 365/GTB/4 Daytona Spyder – Miami Vice

The pilot episode of Miami Vice featured many memorable moments, but by far the most powerful was Crockett and Tubbs racing to the meeting point in Sonny’s Ferrari, as Phil Collins’ "In the Air Tonight" played in the background. You can probably tell I’ve been watching the DVD lately. Anyway, everything about Miami Vice was so cool, but most people can’t get past the fact that he had this car on a cop’s salary. It was issued to him by the force! It probably would have blown his cover if he showed up to a drug deal in a rusty Toyota!

30-30 - Bravestarr

This is the reason why this article is best vehicles of the 80s, and not best cars of the 80s. Frankly, you just couldn’t exclude Bravestarr’s trusty steed. First, we have the fact that he is a horse that can speak. Impressive enough. Couple that with the fact that he can walk upright and carries a bigass shotgun, and you can understand why the article had to be changed. Look at him, and tell me he isn’t impressive! You just can’t do it. Plus I have a policy of agreeing with any shotgun carrying horses that come around, so he’s a natural fit.

A.P.C. - G.I. Joe

Easily one of my favorite Joe vehicles, the APC (Amphibious Personnel Carrier) is quite a site. Basically a bus with guns, the APC can carry around 25 Joes just itching to surprise Cobra. As you can tell from the picture, whoever they’re racing towards is going down. Where’s your backup now, Destro? Yo Joe!

1961 Ferrari 250 GT California Spyder – Ferris Bueller’s Day Off

If you had access to a car like this, would you take it right back? Me neither! In easily one of the greatest 80s movies, Ferris Bueller borrows best friend Cameron’s dad’s prized Ferrari to pull the wool over dastardly Ed Rooney. How many of you were disappointed to learn that your friends didn’t have a car like this that you could borrow? C’mon anybody? Bueller? Bueller? Mind you, the car wouldn’t survive the movie, but we can safely assume they used a substitute like in the Frogger episode of Seinfeld.

Hulkmobile - Hulk Hogan's Rock n Wrestling

To match Hulk’s dominance in the ring, artists gave Hulk a car outside the ring that put everybody to shame. Complete with "H’s" and a mini statue of Hulk as a hood ornament, the Hulkmobile was the perfect fit for Hulk and his championship belt, which he wore everywhere. An interesting note with this car is the space in the backseat, which allowed for all of Hulk’s friends to pop out at a moments notice, like to scare off Roddy Piper in the show’s opening credits.

Rockin' Roadster - Jem

Glamour and glitter, fashion and fame! Jem had it all, and a cool car to boot. A classy looking old school roadster, updated with Jem’s favorite colors, and a REAL WORKING tape deck in the trunk. I could just see her cruising down the kitchen floor with Motley Crue’s "Girls, Girls, Girls" blasting from the back. I’m pretty sure that Jem was a big Motley Crue fan. I mean, she couldn’t have listened to Holograms songs all the time.

Cloud Cars - Care Bears

There is a reason that the Care Bears were able to keep Beastly, Shrieky, and NoHeart from taking over the world, and I think it has something to do with their Cloud Cars. I’ll bet that Shrieky was more than once intimidated by the presence of the cars, which lead to a lackluster performance in many capers. This is what separated the Care Bears from lamer do-gooder groups like the Get Along Gang.

Turtle Van - Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Squeaking in towards the end of the 1980s, we have the Turtle Van which, much like the APC or 30-30 himself, was a mobile ass kicking machine. Loaded with weapons, the Turtle van could do just about anything Donatello wanted it to. Mind you, the van didn’t actually blend in that well, so the element of surprise was often lost as the giant yellow and green van raced towards danger. You’d think that trained ninjas would use more stealth, but hey, I guess they were still teenagers.

Jefferson's Camaro - Fast Times at Ridgemont High

Given to Charles Jefferson by Ridgemont High’s Almuni for playing football in his sophomore year, this Camaro was his pride and joy. So it should come as no surprise that he destroyed the Lincoln High football team after they were framed for trashing it. I can only imagine what he would have done to Spicoli had he learned the truth. Gone were his days of cruising around to the Ridgemont Mall with Earth, Wind, and Fire playing in the background.

Mega Bus - Ernest Goes to Camp

The Federal Government, acting in association with the UN, FBI, CIA, and Interpol has banned the showing of this vehicle, as it is way too intense. The rebel campers at Camp Kikakee took an ordinary bus, and turned it into an engine of destruction, the likes of which have never been seen before. They only used it to get their camp back, just think of what somebody like Cobra Commander would do with it. It is because of this that the government has banned all images of the Mega Bus from appearing on the internet, fearing another bus being created, and overthrowing them. Mind you, you can share the intensity with your friends and family, by picking up a copy of Ernest goes to camp today.

There you have it, a super awesome page. I challenge you to find a better list of vehicles from the 80s, obviously excluding my last one.