Cats rule; dogs drool.

"I'm claiming all of this as mine."

Men don't like cats because cats are cooler than they are.

Dogs come when called; cats have answering machines.

Furball - a game cats like to play on the floor.

A cat could become man's best friend, but never stoops to it.

All dogs go to heaven. Cats watch them leave.

As anyone who owns a cat knows, no one can own a cat.

Cat bumper sticker: Life is hard, then you nap.

A cat is domestic only as far as it suits its own ends.

The best kind of cat toy has a person on one end.

He's a cat of many mistakes; a man of faux pas.

TV screens exist to backlight a cat's lovely tail.

Cats need to climb into EVERY box and open drawer in the household.

Cats must wake their humans up at 3 am for breakfast.

Cats must supervise the human when he/she is working at the kitchen counter.