I met this girl, Nicky, a few weeks ago. She's six years older than me, but from the moment we saw each other, we felt a connection. She saw a scar on my arms, and understood I'm a self injurer, and tried to offer me her support, as she is one too. Later I found out, that like me, she is also struggling with anorexia.
She introduced me to her friends, who were accepting and friendly, and made me a part of their group.
What I learned from Nicky and her friends, is that it is ok to be who I am. I can be a self injurer, an anorectic, I can be depressed and suicidal, I can be on psychiatric medication, I can abuse alcohol and drugs - but I am still a human being with feelings, needs, thoughts and ideas. I am valid.

When I went to see Nicky and her friends in short sleeves, my mother was really worried about their reaction when they see the scars. But one of them said: "are you kidding? You have scars on your hands: you feel and think so powerfully. There is so much more to you than you could ever see" They actually l;iked me, in spite of everything... maybe I could learn to like myself too?

It may be that we will never be able to get rid of our porblems: they'll always be there, in the back of our minds, but we can learn to live with them. We can understand our problems, and accept ourselves as we are. We are not freaks because of our problems. We can be accepted, if we only accept ourselves.

Don't punish yourselves for being who you are. Don't hate yourself for it. I know it's hard for us to love ourselves, I don't know if I ever will be able to, but I know that with all the reasons I have to hate myself, being an anorectic self-injurer is not one of those reasons. I really hope someday society will be able to see us as more than freaks or mental cases. Until then, the least we can do is see ourselves as more than that.