Gay Rights: Equal or Special? - an essay on discrimination.

The World's a Stage - And You're On in Five- an essay about the importance of coming out.

If You Must Hate, Leave Jesus Out! - an essay about how hate and intolerance are not part of what Jesus Christ taught.

Fighting the Hate and The Impeachment - The Connection - an essay about how the impeachment of President Clinton will affect the civil rights movement
 

There is a special piece called When Will the Tears Stop?  I wrote it in tribute to Matthew Shepard, and it was actually read at a candlelight vigil. In some ways, it was a feeble attempt to put into words what I felt in the wake of the tragedy. Yet, this piece also stands out as my personal promise to never forget and to do what I can to fight the spread of hate.
 

The right to marry someone you love. The right to adopt or raise children. The right to serve in the military. The right to express oneself freely and honestly. The right to hold one’s partner’s hand in public. The right to equal protection at work, in public, and under the law. The right to gather socially or, as guaranteed by the Constitution, to assemble peaceably.

What, if anything, is so unusual about any of these rights in American society?

To the average heterosexual in this country, probably nothing. Each of these rights is among the many enjoyed by all heterosexuals in the United States. In fact, many actually take these rights for granted, knowing these rights and others exist, guaranteed for all American citizens.

Think again. To the men and women in this country who are openly gay, these rights are not available. They are, for gay men and lesbians, a goal that has not been reached. At this time, not one of the fifty states recognizes same-sex marriages, and many have banned them. The federal government itself has passed legislation banning same-sex marriages, reserving marriage as a right available only to heterosexual couples. Adoption by same-sex couples is replete with additional obstacles not posed heterosexual applicants, regardless of the number of children forced to grow up in orphanages and state-run institutions, regardless of the resources and love a gay or lesbian couple could give to enrich the life of a child. The military’s discrimination against gays and lesbians and its virulent drive to purge its ranks - despite the “Don’t ask, Don’t tell” policy - are well known.

And, then, there is the assault on gays and lesbians masked as a campaign to cure homosexuality. No one questions whether or not heterosexuality is in need of a cure.

Too often, gays and lesbians face risk losing jobs or housing simply because of sexual orientation. To actually display love and affection for one’s gay or lesbian partner raises cries of moral indignation and condemnation, social branding, and discrimination. Even worse, being openly gay or lesbian runs the risk of violent attacks, verbal or physical, with the ultimate “punishment” of death. Heterosexuals face no such repercussions because of their sexual orientation.

These are the “equal rights” homosexuals have in this country. They are, in fact, social penalties thrust upon gays and lesbians by a heterosexist and homophobic society. Heterosexuals do not face such harsh realities. And, yet, in seeking true equality and protection from these injustices, the gay community is told it already has equal status and that it is seeking special privileges.

It is terribly ironic when it is asserted gays and lesbian are seeking special privileges. Is equal protection a special privilege? Is protection from discrimination at work or in public, in the legal system and in government a special privilege. Is honest expression of one’s true self a special privilege? Is raising a child a special privilege?

Of course not! There is no sound legal basis in this country for denying anyone equal rights. There is no logical reason for labeling as special privileges for gays and lesbians things already granted heterosexuals. A double standard has become the social norm, supporting discrimination and inequality.

This nation touts itself as the champion of human rights throughout the world. Whenever the oppression manifests elsewhere, the United States responds swiftly with indignant protests and demands for change. American foreign policy and social sentiment demands other nations treat their citizens justly and fairly. Yet, at home, discriminatory practices continue unabated and, in some instances, incorporated into the systems and institutions that govern this country. In calling open other nations to observe human rights, while American domestic policies condone discrimination, the United States has revealed itself a world leader only in hypocrisy.

Gays and lesbians in American society are not granted equality. Any who would claim otherwise has a very inaccurate definition of equality. Heterosexist values and homophobic legal posturing by intolerant conservatives have seen fit to relegate homosexuals to the ranks of second-class citizens. To deny gays and lesbians the rights and freedoms granted others is a betrayal of the fundamental legacy given all Americans by those who forged this nation. In a country where discrimination is allowed to flourish, even legalized, the words “. . . one nation . . . indivisible . . . with liberty and justice for all,” ring as a monumental lie and a collectively twisted view wherein equality exists only for those who are deemed worthy.

Just what are the obstacles gays and lesbian face in the struggle for equality in American society? Does the U.S. Constitution, the Supreme Law of the Land and spine of the American legal system allow for inequality and second-class citizenship? It most clearly does not. No where within the entire text of the Constitution does it state that anyone is to be exempted from the rights and freedoms granted therein. The Preamble itself states, “We, the People, in Order to form a more perfect Union . . .” It does not say either “we, the heterosexuals” or “We, the moral conservatives.”

Apparently, there is no true legal basis for inequality and discrimination. The fact is, many of the discriminatory policies incorporated into the American legal system spring from individual beliefs. The foundation of these beliefs are irrelevant, be they personal or religious, or anything else. Just as they are, within the legal context outlined by the Constitution, irrelevant in governmental process. Unfortunately, a few self-appointed “guardians of morality” have managed to force their views upon American society and have them incorporated into the legal and social fabric of our nation.

Gay men and lesbians in this country are not asking for much. They ask only to be granted equality, to be allowed to lives their lives in peace. To be able to live without having to fight for who and what they are and without having to live in fear. Gays and lesbian are humans, too, thinking and feeling. Is it too much to ask to be treated as such? Or must gays and lesbians continue to be viewed and treated as less than human? Any attempt to degrade or dehumanize on the basis of sexual orientation has that effect. Ultimately, gays and lesbians want only to be themselves - not some image of what society dictates.

Equal rights or special privileges? The struggle of gays and lesbians is for equal rights. Nothing more. The special privileges already belong to those who dictate social values and who have the rights denied gays and lesbians. For homosexuals to achieve equal rights, those with the special privileges will have to surrender their special status.

Remember, a special privilege is something given one group or individual that is not held by another. Think again about the list of rights in the opening paragraph. Heterosexuals in this country already have those rights. Gays and lesbians do not. It is a simple statement of the reality of American society.

For those who continue to protest, that gays and lesbians are demanding special privileges, there are two things you need to do. First, open a dictionary and read the definition of equality. Then, look around and see who really has the special privileges in this country.
 

Quite a lot of buzz has been generated lately regarding the proposed Millennium March on Washington. If the event goes forward as planned by the national Human Rights Campaign and supporting organizations, thousands of gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and their allies will descend on the nation's capital in the year 2000 in a show of unity and strength.

The debate revolves around the actual necessity of a national event when the focus of the gay rights movement is primarily at the state and local level. Supporters and detractors both have strong arguments, but there is at least one point on which both sides generally agree: the necessity of visibility.

On October 11, National Coming Out Day will be observed across the country. This one day, also as part of Gay and Lesbian History Month, gives each of us a chance to stand up and be counted as part of a larger heritage. It is an opportunity we should not let slip by.

In the ongoing battle for equal rights without regard to sexual orientation, visibility is one of the most powerful tools we have. To become more visible as a group is to draw more attention to our struggle as a group. The voices raised are no longer alone, but part of a larger movement. As such, it becomes more difficult to just dismiss the cries for equality.

To remain invisible is to allow the general public to ignore and overlook us.

Only by capturing attention can we ever hope to effectively demonstrate the inequities forced on us because of our sexual orientation. Only by showing American society that we seek only the same rights and civil liberties as the heterosexual majority can we achieve social equality. A handful of faces and voices are not enough to get the attention of the American public.

Many of those who adamantly oppose equal rights for gays and lesbians, condemn us as immoral, and target us as the the cause of degenerating social values would have us remain silent. Why? Because by keeping our cries unheard and our numbers out of sight, they can maintain their power structures and continue to dictate codes of morality to the nation without fear of opposition. The status quo remains unaltered, and we, as gay and lesbian people, are forced to endure discrimination and second-class citizenship.

Visibility ensures that we, as gays and lesbians, will no longer settle for such social maltreatment. Each new face behind the banner means one more voice. Each call shakes the decaying foundations of the solaced status quo.

How does visibility relate to the individual? To the majority of the American public, the shouting throng waving pride flags is a crowd of nameless strangers. It is only the individual who can lend the catalyst of familiarity. When the face seen and the voice heard are one that is known, the isolated observer is no longer disconnected.

Too often, I have heard another gay or lesbian person say there is nothing he or she can do. Or that there are already enough of us fighting the battle for equal rights. Neither statement could be further from the truth! Each and every one of us needs to stand up and be counted. It is left to all of us to contribute to the struggle - because it is a struggle that affects all of us. By showing our numbers, the American public can see we are not a few isolated radicals. We are a community of considerable size. We show that we are friends, sons or daughters, mothers or fathers, brothers or sisters, family, neighbors, and co-workers. We can show that we are thinking, feeling human beings, capable of love and caring.

As National Coming Out Day approaches, each of us has an opportunity to reinforce the strength of visibility and shape it within the framework of familiarity. Don't think of it as an obligation to the gay community or the struggle for equal rights, however. It is an obligation to yourself. In the end, the triumphant achievement of equal rights rests with the individuals who work together.

Until we, as gays, lesbians, and bisexuals finally achieve true equality within society, we must remain visible as a united community. But only the commitment and contribution of each individual provides the strength necessary to maintain the momentum of the communal effort. Our brothers and sisters out there leading the effort need our - your - support.

We owe it to them - you owe it to yourself - to give it to them
 

While the tragic death of Matthew Shepard has saddened many, what saddens me even more deeply is the barrage of hateful protests and statements made by people who claim to be messengers of God's will and true Christians. How can followers of Jesus Christ - who taught love and acceptance - be so filled with hate and so completely without compassion? How can messengers of the God of Love be so spiteful and uncaring as to blame and bring more suffering to a family already devastated by the loss of one they loved?

It is sad and disturbing that some men and women, calling themselves Christians, would commit such evil acts in His name. Hate is evil. It is dark and cold, without remorse, serving no other purpose than to destroy. It brings only pain and suffering. Christ never taught hatred or intolerance. His was a message of universal love, of building a brotherhood among all people. His way was compassion.

Were Jesus physically among us, He would most likely have been beside the family of Matthew Shepard in their time of need, consoling them and offering support. He certainly would not have been among those protesting the funeral and shouting messages of hate and intolerant accusation.

I am, by no means, a religious authority or biblical scholar. However, I am familiar with the Bible. More to the point, I have accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. And, I am gay. Still, by the very teachings He left us, I know I am not forsaken. Nor will I be condemned as an abomination. This I know, because the love of Jesus and the Father are for all people, without regard to difference. Nevertheless, there are those in the world who claim I and all other gay persons are unworthy of that universal love.

In John 13:34-35, it reads, “I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you should love one another. By this, everyone will know you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” Jesus spoke these words. There were no exempting criteria or instructions to love only certain people. It was not a request. It was a commandment. Something His followers were to obey. As Christ’s love was unconditional, there was no allowance for hate and discrimination.

Yet, time and again, some who profess to follow Christ have been hateful and intolerant of certain people. They preach their hate to others who, in turn, practice and promote that hate. It becomes a pretense to judge and, in some cases, injure or even kill. There was no love in the condemnation of a young man who was beaten and killed. There was no love in blaming his family for his homosexuality and death. There was no love when these hateful persons protested the funeral, without regard to the additional suffering their actions brought to others. All of these acts were in direct opposition to Jesus’ commandment and the message of love.

The Reverend Fred Phelps and others like him may call themselves Christians or messengers of God's will. Their followers may call themselves the same things. My question, to each and every one of them is simple: How can someone embrace and spread hate and intolerance and still call themselves Christian? It would seem to me it cannot be both ways.

In addition to Christ's commandment of universal love, there was another statement He made that applies here. In Matthew 1:1-2, it says, “Do not judge, so that you may not be judged. For with the judgment you make will you be judged, and the measure you give will be the measure you get.” Quite simply, this was a call for acceptance. However, to actively denounce a person a group on any basis is an act of moral judgment. Sadly, it becomes all too easy to pass such judgments when love is already absent. Some may say, “Hate the sin, but love the sinner.” This is still a judgment - and too often, a justification for hate. And, again, it becomes clear that some self-proclaimed followers of Christ are not following His teachings or the example He set.

I can already hear the arguments and disagreements. Answers that are taken from biblical passages to justify condemnation and judgment of certain people. Interpretations that grant the freedom to degrade and despise. Those who would disagree have that right, and I will not dispute their right. I will say only this: If those arguments contradict the words of Christ, which then is the real message? Which is the right one? The interpretations of men or the actual teachings of Jesus?
 
 

For those who continue to spread messages of hate, who continue to degrade and dehumanize others, the rhetoric should not be in any way connected to Jesus. He was a man of love and peace, the Son of the God of Love. To teach and spread hate is not in accordance with what He Taught. Say, rather, it is the promotion of personal beliefs, using His name for credibility. Hate and intolerance are, in themselves, destructive and wrong. To call for them on the behalf of a man whose life was given for the love of all people is a travesty against Him and a disservice to those Christians who do follow the message of love.
 

It may seem the Republican leadership has been shaken up, but this will more likely solidify the hold of the party right wing conservatives (and we know how they respond to civil rights issues). Also, even if the Senate does convict (which is unlikely as they need 67 votes out of 100), Clifton's effectiveness may be severely compromised. What does that mean for us? Quite simply, it means we're going to have our hands full! The republicans have already demonstrated a flagrant disregard for both what is right and the will of the people. The impeachment resulted in Americans speaking up with a single voice. Our movement - equality and freedom from discrimination from all - currently comes from what the social majority divides into minority groups - to keep us from having too strong a voice. Now, we must put our collective voices into a single message, thus becoming the majority. Will this deter the Republican leadership and the right-wing Christian groups they sleep with. No. But it can wake up the rest of the country to a tragic truth.

People have died because of intolerance and discrimination. The general public is realizing that. Now we need to show them how to change the social climate that brings those tragedies into reality. THEN we can unseat those in government who refuse to listen.

It's the only way we're ever going to make it - by making sure our message is heard. And that means we have to shout. That means we have to have a strong voice.