First sentence is in Fraternity speak and second sentence is in English.

"I'll kick your ass"
I'm gonna get 20 of my buddies together

"I've never lost a fight"
I've never been in a fight

"Surely we can talk this out"

"I'm about to introduce you to pain"
I'm gonna pay a football guy to beat you up
Not the face! Not the face!

"I believe in a fair fight"
We'll start when my buddies arrive

"I hope to broaden my horizons"
I'm here for the beer and sex

"Hello, may I buy you a drink ?"
How much alcohol does it take to bed you?

"Would you like to dance ?"
Please give me a reason to touch you

"Men should be alert to women's needs"
Chicks who don't swallow piss me off

"That's a very interesting name"
Of course in two minutes I'll forget it

"Would you like to go to my place"
I'll brag how "easy" you were

"I'd like to get to know you better"
How about undressing?

"I respect Christianity"
Besides, water to wine is cool

"I respect your decision of abstinence"
Hey ! I paid, now put out!

"Of course I'll respect you in the morning"
If I can remember who you are

"I don't do this with just anyone"
Another notch in the ole belt

"I'm willing for a relationship"
You're ugly, but I only want sex

"I Love You"
God, I hope she doesn't call

"I agree you've been oppressed"
That doesn't mean I like ya

"Your plight is awe-inspiring"
I hate you, you whiner

"I think of you a brother"
Never could stand him either

"We should take birth control seriously"
How do I know it's my kid?

"Condoms have a 20% failure rate"
No way am I using that thing

"This homeless problem is terrible !"
Can't we shoot them or something

"World hunger is a problem"
Better them than me though

"Woman"
B**ch

"Friend"
Someone to get me stuff

"Art Student"
Fairy

"Art Students" (when surrounded)
Master of Visual Arts

"Girlfriend"
Guaranteed Sex