-In Grand Saline, Texas, parents forced the removal of a picture of Santa Claus, saying the letters in Santa can be rearranged to spell Satan --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-The Chia Pet/Chia Tree purchase registration form asks, "Why did you purchase this Chia?" One of the multiple-choice answers: "Companionship." --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-Parents sought to have a Chicago elementary school teacher fired after he gave his students a math test laced with questions such as the following: "Rufus is pimping three girls. If the price is $65 for each trick, how many tricks will each girl have to turn before Rufus can pay for his $800-a-day crack habit?" Another stumper: "LeRoy has an AK-47 that takes a 40-round clip. If he fires off eight rounds at each drive-by shooting, how many such shootings can he attend before he must reload?" --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-Mikey Sproul, age 3, made national news when he commandeered the family car, which had one flat tire, and cruised down U. S. 41 near Tampa, Fla., hitting two parked cars and narrowly missing several moving ones. Mikey's assessment: "I go zoom." On November 11, using a cigarette lighter, Mikey burned down his family's house, sending his father to the hospital with second and third degree burns. Mikey's assessment: "Now I have no more house." --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

- Two men approached a teller at the Harbor Bank in Baltimore with a note reading "I have a gun. Gimme me [sic] your money or else." According to a witness, the teller looked at the note, which was written on the back of a deposit slip for another bank, and replied, "This is a Maryland National [Bank] transaction you have to go to Maryland National." The men looked at each other, panicked, and ran off.