Alison Folland is an actor who made her debut in Gus Van Sant's "To Die For" and has been in movies like "All Over Me," "Before And After" and "Good Will Hunting." One of the reasons why we asked her for this interview was her being featured as one of the top 50 girl-centric things in Spin magazine. The other 99% is because she's neater than sliced bread. Transcribed here is our half baked interview. Join Ali this month in the hellfire palace chat. Date to be announced.

tabasco: okay.. we won't bug you with questions about who you worked with and all that crap. we wanna know ali stuff. tell us something mad filthy.

ali: filthy. filthy. um.. think quack. think quick. (fang humps her leg) this is fucking filthy.

jezebel: he really loves humping you.

blade: fang man, shit!

ali: nothing can come between me and fang.

tabasco: what'd you do for new year's?

ali: ::laughing:: got drunk, ah... and uh.. what else happened? umm.. and then i danced and i dissed this guy named *peanut-butter-cups. (name witheld to protect the innocent)

basco: what do you think of the internet?

ali: it frightens me.

tabasco: i mentioned to you earlier that there were interviews with you on the web, and you said you were unaware that there were any... so that means that hellfire rocks, right?

ali: hellfire definitely rocks. hellfire is the first web site i've ever been to. because the first time i've ever been on the internet was a week ago. (addressing fang) get your nose out of my stuff!

tabasco: would you do repeated interviews with us?

ali: ::laughing:: i'd be honored to do repeated interviews with you. yes. you bring the *choopydoopies. (item's name witheld to protect the innocent)

tabasco: would you join us in a hellfire palace chat?

ali: what?

tabasco: who would you like to be pitted against in the versus area?

ali: tina yothers.

tabasco: would you jello mud-wrestle with tina yothers for hellfire.com?

ali: as long as she's wearing a bikini and still has that hair cut from family ties and little lace bootie socks.

tabasco: can I doodle on your arm? with a pen I mean.

ali: seeing that i've done it earlier, a little more wont do any harm

(she breaks into the Mister Hanky salutation) "Well HowdyHo!" tabasco: if you were a South Park character, who would you be?

ali: hmmmmmmmmm.... hmmmmmmm.... kyle's little brother. Ike.

tabasco: where can we see your bad ass thespian self in next?

ali: the dumpster on the corner of 162nd and st nicholas.

tabasco: would you offer readers of hellfire an autographed post-it note if they wrote you a letter?

ali: well fuck yeah.

tabasco: do you wanna join the hellfire mob?

ali: ::laughing:: i thought you'd never ask. tabasco: cool... wanna go snowboarding this weekend?

ali: that's the plan.

tabasco: wanna slap a spice girl now?

ali: i've been asking if i could do that for the past 2 hours. tabasco: tell us something else that's filthy. i'm diggin here...

ali: ok... i ripped the seam of my pants from the apex of my crotch to the top of my butt crack while i was squatting in the middletown bus stop.

..::FIN::..

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