A DESK DRIVE THROUGH FIVE YEARS OF LATE NIGHT By Robin Banks

LATE NIGHT WITH CONAN O'BRIEN IN 1997

January 9, Show #709: Musical guest Ashley MacIsaac accidentally flashes the audience when his kilt flies up in mid-performance. He's fine with it and declines Late Night's offer to re-record his segment. Other guests were John Cleese, and James Carville.

February 6, Show #721: A herd of goats are summoned to the studio by Fran Drescher's laugh. Conan falls off his chair while interviewing her. Other guests were William Shatner, and Paul Lukas.

February 13, Show #725: Triumph, the insult comic dog appears for the first time. Guests were movie critics Siskel & Ebert and actress Jennifer Lopez.

February 26, Show #732: Former pimp-turned-rapper-turned-actor Ice T is introduced to Pimpbot 5000, a 1950s robot with the dynamic flair of a 1970s street pimp. Pimpbot comments that he hasn't seen Ice in the old neighborhood for a while.

March 11, Show #735: It's revealed the Tommy Blacha, who plays The Gaseous Wiener, has broken his leg. Conan shows a photo of him in his apartment and urges people to send in "Get Well Wiener" messages.

March 12, Show #736: Conan tries to replace The Wiener with a new character - The Belching Potato. It doesn't work however much he tries.

April 7: After a series of short-term renewals, Conan O'Brien's contract with NBC is extended for five more years guaranteeing he will host "Late Night" beyond the year 2000... up until 2002. Conan said: "Hopefully this means I'll be able to move out of the YMCA."

April 23, Show #752: Conan makes his first offer of political asylum to Zaire's dictator President Mobutu. If he moves into Studio 6A he'll get a dormitory style bed and an original poster from the smash movie "Maverick." This show also featured Conan's annual Passover Claymation special.

April 24, Show #753: Andy becomes an On Camera Meteorologist (OCM) for the Weather Channel. He choses music for weather, and then appears on camera wearing a blue suit which makes him all but invisible on screen.

April 30, Show #756: It's confession time at Late Night. Andy 'fesses up to having a Nose fetish, Max has a Betty Ford Dominatrix fetish, and Triumph the insult comic dog, confesses a poop fetish,

May 1, show #757: Conan heads off to Houston, Texas where the show is not shown until 2:40 a.m. (sadly the local affiliate prefers to show talk show repeats and infomercials). Conan goes around trying to find people who might be watching that late at night. In a bus station he meets "Buffalo" a heavyweight dude, who was not entirely impressed with the show's early days and asks Conan, "Where's the little fat dude?" Conan says, "I was just almost killed!"

May 9, Show #762: Conan and Billy Crystal sneak into the New York Yankees clubhouse. Where Red Sox fan Conan and Yankee fan Crystal play baseball together, look through the players locker rooms, steal their gum and read their fan mail.

May 14, Show #764: Former Senator and election candidate Bob Dole appears on the show confronting his "Clutch Cargo" alter ego.

May 19 Show #767: Andy reports from New York's Alternative Health Expo.

May 22, Show #770: The Late Night Ventriloquist Dummy Choir fly to Budapest, Hungary to appear on a talk show. They take with them, a Yasmine Bleeth cardboard figure.

June 5, Show #774: For the first time ever Conan and Andy's Staring Contest is a tie!!

July 8, show #788: Conan begins his campaign for the re-release of the movie "Dirty Dancing" calling it "The best movie ever made".

July 10, Show #790: Conan interviews one of his heroes, Beatle Paul McCartney in London on the eve of the release of his latest album.

July 18, Show #795: Conan goes to Truck Driving School.

July 22, Show #796: Conan's "Dirty Dancing" campaign continues with a threat to fire trombonist "La Bamba" unless the film is re-released. Conan cites the film's best line: "Nobody puts Baby in a corner." As one of the best lines ever.

July 29, Show #800: Conan is happy to announce that La Bamba's job is safe as "Dirty Dancing" is scheduled for re-release on August 22.

July 31: Conan admits that he had "Dirty Dancing" confused with either "Footloose" or "Flashdance." He takes a look at a clip from the film and urges his viewers to ban it because it's "the worst movie ever made".

August 6, Show #805: The Gaseous Wiener re-appears… he's in the audience, he's married, and he can't remember his previous life…. Or can he?

August 8, show #807: Another first for Late Night, and for talk shows everywhere as they perform to an audience filled with six to eight year old kids. "If the NBC research department is correct, this is our core audience," says Conan. Guests were Dave Foley of NBC's ``NewsRadio,'' CNN financial expert Myron Kandel and Clyde Peeling and his uninsured animal pals. Conan points out kids in the audience who resemble celebrities. The Boredom Monster appears whenever the kids don't laugh enough. And if they misbehave Conan will send them to naughty land. The show ends with a silly string fight.

August 21, Show #814: Conan and Andy take a trip outside the studio in the Good Humor Ice Cream Truck.

September 30, Show #827: Andy is caught out trying to be the sidekick on "The Tonight Show" where he was a guest on the previous night.

October 7: Late Night's first CD is released "Live From 6A: Great Musical Performances from 'Late Night with Conan O'Brien.'" Artists featured are: Ani DiFranco, David Bowie, Matthew Sweet, Jamiroquai, Bjork, Elvis Costello, Cake, Jonathan Richman, Edwyn Collins, 311, Soul Coughing and Squirrel Nut Zippers.

October 9 Show #833: Andy has an idea of how he's like the show opening scenes to be. He's carried out dressed in gold lame shirts in a circus style entrance.

October 21: Conan is in Cologne, Germany and appears on Germany's answer to David Letterman, "Die Harald Schmidt Show".

November 6, show #845: Conan shows a hilarious remote from Amsterdam, where be buys "tulips" and is a little underwhelmed with his trip until Ozzy Osbourne shows up in his hotel. They tour Amsterdam together.

November 12, Show #848: Conan files a report from Germany. He visits the city of Cologne (referred to as "Aftershaven") where he guests on Die Harald Schmidt Show.

November 26, Show #856: Political and social activist Rev. Al Sharpton performs the James Brown classic, "Sex Machine." The Ventriloquist Dummy Choir also perform their annual Thanksgiving musical montage.

November 27, Show #857: The Masturbating Bear tries to quit smoking and Andy utters the immortal line: "For God sake let the bear masturbate!!"

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