Interlude: Hard Truths

The swing in the backyard had been there for as long as Jack could remember and he and Jason had fought over it for just as long. For some reason, their father had never bothered to put up another and despite constant requests for two, the one swing remained. It hung from a sturdy tree and the ropes that supported it had to be replaced at least once every two years, but none of the Branegans ever thought to use steel cables instead of natural fibers. There was something about the sound of the ropes straining against the weight of the swing that was relaxing to all of them and even though Lance would vehemently deny it when someone in the family told stories of him gleefully swinging his legs like a six year old, getting the swing to go as high as possible, he did just that.

Jack missed his father at that moment as he half-heartedly rocked his feet in the ground to give the swing a soft push. He leaned forward, his hands clasped together at his knees as he replayed what he had seen that night over and over in his head He was still not over the shock of seeing Bethie and Skech together, unable to forget the look that the couple had exchanged the moment their hands had touched. Jack had seen that look before, saw it when his parents looked at each other from across a room and knew that he had lost Bethie to a man he had not even thought to look to.

He wasn't sure when he fell in love with his best friend, but he knew when he realized it. It had been the day before he left for the Academy and he and Bethie had been sitting by the lake as they like to do. They had just had a huge dinner with both their families and Jack had been toasted and wished well within an inch of his life. He was the first to go to the Academy out of their generation and his mother had not been able to stop crying for the last week.

It was late by the time he and Bethie were able to steal away, but they did not let the time stop them. He had not planned to say anything, but his heart had been heavy when they sat by the lake, with her at his feet as he sat a little higher up on the tree. The moon had been half-full that night, but it cast enough of a light for him to see the expression on her face when she looked up at him. Her tears were two silver trails on her cheeks and her blue eyes luminous as she met the stormy gray of his. Then, she turned away and rested her dark head on his bent knee, the only physical contact between the two of them. He remembered thinking how beautiful she had looked to him just then and how much it hurt to think that he was leaving her behind, to go through something important in his life without her by his side for the first time. It hurt to leave home, to leave his family, but leaving Bethie left a hole in his heart that he had not expected. Confused, he had reached out and put a hand on her head. She turned and smiled for him, taking his hand and pressing a kiss in his palm. His heart had leapt into his throat and he knew then why that hole was there.

Billions of kilometers and years separated them, but his feelings never weakened...to his dismay, absence really did make the heart grow fonder. She made sure of it with her funny messages and as hard as he tried, he could not do anything to change his feelings. He'd had girlfriends, affairs, and through all of it there was the spectre of Bethie, the frustrating need to have her, to find her in someone else because he knew that it could never be. Jack knew she cared about him, would lay her life on the line for him, but not her heart. She had no problems talking to him about his choice of women even though it had pained him to listen to her speak of other men, but as far as he knew, she had not had any serious relationships. He thought that maybe that meant she was having the same difficulties he was having...and then there came Skech. Humorlessly, he had the thought that perhaps Bethie had been going through the same as he when it came to relationships--except he was not the object of her difficulties. She'd always had a soft spot for her father's aide, they all knew it, but the age difference had made that dream impossible. At least, that's what Jack had always thought, but apparently, age was nothing but a number.

Thinking about it was like a knife in his chest and he looked down at his hands as he remembered the women who had cursed his good name. They sure would enjoy seeing him like this, shoulders slumped and heart in pieces at his feet. Fortunately for him, he was used to feeling this way when it came to Bethie and he was very good at covering up how he really felt. It was just that he could not keep it up forever and he needed some time alone before he could get his mask back on--besides, this was far worse than he had ever experienced in the past. Preparing himself for Bethie's inevitable relationship with someone else was a whole different thing from seeing it.

"Jack?"

Startled, he turned and met the concerned gray eyes of his mother, a softer gray when she looked at her family, but steely when put on the mantle of mayor. Link put a hand on his shoulder, gently kneading as she went to stand at his side. She was still dressed in her work clothes, the somber outfit a sharp contrast to the brightly colored garments she liked to wear inside the house.

"Are you alright?" she asked.

"I'm just doing some thinking."

"I heard about Voltron. I'm proud of you."

He smiled, gave her hand a squeeze. "Thanks, Mom."

"That wasn't what you were thinking of though, were you?"

He started to paste a teasing smile on his face, but the expression of motherly concern was his undoing. He had wanted the quiet time to put himself back together but he was not even halfway there when she came by and he had always been something of a mama's boy. Link put her arms around his neck, resting her cheek against his. He sighed and rubbed at his face.

"Did you talk to her tonight, Jack?" she asked carefully.

He stiffened.

"You don't have to tell me. I'm your mother. I know you. Before you even ask, I don't think anyone knows or has even suspected how you feel about her, but I always knew. I probably knew before you did. Don't be embarrassed and don't feel like you have to tell me anything, but I am here for you if you need to talk. She's a wonderful girl and has always been a loyal friend to you, if not the best you'd ever had, but I know how feelings can change. I watched it happen to her parents. But Jack...it's not time yet for you two."

"It may never be the time, Mom," he said quietly.

"Do you love her as much as I think you do?"

He nodded. Link sighed and kissed his cheek.

"You're a good boy, despite what your other women think. And Jack, I have to say that I'm not too happy about that and the reason why you're here to begin with, but I understand why you are the way you are. You've already found what you wanted--it's just a matter of finally attaining it. Just...be careful."

"I've always been careful."

"Maybe that's why nothing's happened yet," she suggested.

Jack turned his head to look at her.

"No...I need her, Mom. I may not have all that I want, but I'll take what little I can get."

Link's smile was sad.

"I've never known you to settle, Jack, but I trust your judgment. I just want you to be happy."

"I know...I know."

Link gave his cheek a pat and went back inside the house. Jack went back to staring at his hands, the swing's rope creaking softly as he swayed.