Ch. 20
(Kevin's point-of-view)
I strolled along the river with Kristin on my arm. "Thank you for flying in."
"You're welcome-it's no big deal. I only wish I was able to fly in more often and that plane tickets didn't cost so much."
"If you need help with the money I'll-"
She lifted her slender hand into the air cutting me off. "That's my problem not yours."
I twirled a small rock in my hand twisting it from side to side. "If only everything would just be okay."
She sat down against the cold ground. "You know that's impossible. I won't lie to you and say it will be okay- I'm not God I can't predict the future."
"I wasn't asking you to!" I snapped throwing the rock into the Ohio River watching it sink to it's death.
"Kevin, what's gotten into you?"
"Anger."
"Why?"
"In just a few days it will be the anniversary of realizing my dad was going to die. Why aren't my brothers here? Why isn't my mom bringing it up?"
"Sometimes, it's easier not to dwell on things- or they'll take over you."
"And you're saying that I'm allowing this to take over me?"
She stood. "Honestly, Kevin, I don't know what you're doing. I know you're mother is a strong woman-who constantly stayed at her husband's bedside. Maybe she doesn't know if YOU'RE strong enough to talk about it."
I paused. "Me? I am strong."
"Yeah, strong-minded." She brushed my hair away from my eyes. "Tim is a man of God and your brother-surely, you can talk to him. He's only a few minutes away. And Jerald only a phone call away. You have plenty of options available to help you through this and discover what it is and why it is. But you have to be smart enough to accept it." She turned away from me walking into the distance.
"Kristin!" I shouted quickly pulling myself to my feet. "Where are you going?"
"For a walk. I'm giving you time to figure this out."
"Kristin, it's cold-you'll get sick."
"I'll risk it if you'll be happy or at least at peace with yourself."
"But what if...."
"What if you don't work through this seems to be the bigger question right now, I'll be fine."
I sunk back to frozen grass. How did a country boy like me get a girl with a mind like that? Or even more importantly....Why didn't I listen to her? I turned my head to see her shivering with each step. I sighed and pulled my cell phone from my pocket. I viewed the land that my father use to walk upon daily; somehow being where he once had been made me realize Krisitin was right. Despite the cold I sat there dialing Tim's phone number afraid that if I left that spot the courage would fade away.
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