A sad commentary today.

I Am an American, Too 8:50 AM I am very troubled today. Perhaps it is partly because I am so tired, but I am feeling that many people consider me un-American because I can't "Yay, Rah, Rah." I am challenged at every point, because I believe that more killing does not bring closure to the terrible events of last week. I am scared because this thirst for more blood may hide the need for all of us to look at the root causes of the hatred so many of the world have for America and Americans. I don't see that anyone in position of power is talking about how we fix that. And I am being attacked on several sides, even from good friends. At this point, I can't even respond to anyone on the COF board, because I see that my view is considered traitorous. I am going to post this, knowing that those who read it will be angry at me. But I have to state what I believe in my heart to be true; that vengeance and hatred breed more vengeance and hatred. I don't have any good answers to this problem of bringing the terrorists to justice; but there must be a national debate in which all views are heard. I love our flag, and our country. But when I see it worn or flown in the name of revenge, I get scared. "We must be united behind our president," said a friend this morning. United against what? Against terrorism, OK, but who is that? Even if Osama Bin Laden is found to be unequivocally behind this act, do we think bombing his host country, killing more people, is going to end terrorism? It won't. It won't as long as we are seen by so much of the world as arrogant abusers of the world's resources who are much more worried about our economy than we are about injustice in the world. I didn't listen to the president's speech last night. I had too much studying to do (and I fell asleep doing that). Maybe his rhetoric has changed, I don't know. I hope we aren't heading into a war that, like Viet Nam, we can't win. I am exhausted by worrying about this new generation of boys, and now girls, that may have to pay the price of our need for vengeance. I've been through this with Korea and Viet Nam, worrying about the boys. Luckily for me, I had no one to worry about with the Gulf War and Somalia or the Balkans. But many other mothers and grandmothers wept themselves to sleep then. And for what? So my politics and personal beliefs are not popular just now. I'm feeling isolated from friends, and probably some of my family. I will have to turn my energies to my faith and my studies, and stay out of everyone's way, I guess.

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