~My Thoughts~
9/11/01


On a lovely fall morning, with touches of Autumn filling the trees, I watched with horror an incredible act of terrorism that has left me devoid of words. My world spun out of control and my constant companion became an inanimate object with a heart of pixels. I could not leave it! I lit candles everyday. Said prayers. And, kept hoping this was somehow the worst nightmare I had ever had; and in the morning it would all be over. It wasn't!

Everything in my life ground to a standstill. Meals became nothing more than sandwiches as I struggled to find some sense in this outrage. I watched memorial services. I listened to our President. I kept waiting for something to wake me up! And, then I heard it. And, a rage began to fill me. You see; I believe in freedom. But (and it's a big BUT) when someone uses the resources of this freedom to do evil; I become kinda crazy. To learn that these terrorists used OUR freedom to school themselves to fly. OUR freedom to live and go where they wished. The very essence of these United States of America was used to commit this deplorable act, and, (in my mind) is akin to treason!

Now, I ventured out of my house and back into the world. Autumn is my favorite season, but on this day, the beautiful colors and dancing leaves could not penetrate into my soul. There was no peace in them for me; indeed, I wasn't even aware of them. What I was aware of was an eerie absence of sound. Where was the traffic? I crossed streets without hardly pausing. The shopping center had little more than employee cars in the parking lot. So, I shopped to piped music and the absence of other shoppers. When I saw others, their faces were as grim as my own. The whole experience was not making me feel one bit better. I walked to my mom's. Good ole mom. She would help me put some sort of sense to how awful I was feeling. We talked a long time. I didn't feel any better and it was time to head for home. How does one make sense of something that is so totally unconceiveable to them? I don't know. I did know that something had to be found to lift me from this all consuming pain.

It was then that I heard it. A faint sound that grew louder as I approached. And, I began to search for the source of the sound. When I found it, I just stopped dead in my tracks. I stood and watched for a while. I said a prayer of thanks for this wonderful sound. You see, it filled me with peace. I felt tension draining from me and tears filling my eyes. It was a piece of blessed relief. What was this sound? It was hope. It came from the throat of two children. Playing in the leaves, eating sticky donoughts and laughing. Too young to be aware that the world had changed. Too young to even care. Life for them was unchanged. And, as I watched them play, I knew this is why we must fight this terrorism. The future was playing in the leaves, and they would need years to grow. They would need a safe world, and it was up to all of us to do everything we could to make it happen. And, as I walked away, hope still laughed in the leaves.

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