Author:Linda Gentile
Email: AndieWtter@aol.com
Catergory:,X/C,C/D
Rating:Nothing worse than the show
Summary: Cordelia and Xander both skipped town pretty fast after graduation and as Cordelia is starts her relationship with Doyle she realizes she has to settle some things with Xander. This story is written in Cordelia's POV.
Disclaimer:All characters belong to Satan er- I mean the crack monger er- I mean Joss McCrackmonkee er Joss Whedon and his evil minions including :Mutant Enemy, 20th Century fox, WB etc.. But not me cuz if they did Doyle and Cordy would be together as would Giles and Jenny!!!(Shutting up now)
Feedback:Always a nice thing. Not as nice as seeing Doyle every week ,but nice still the same. Please send it to AndieWtter.
Spoilers:All eps of BtVS and ANGEL so far
Notes:This story is kinda short and may become part of a series the idea just kinda popped into my head at work. Ok I wrote it at work but that is just not the point.
Distribution:Hopefully Em's sight Doyle's House of Pies (If she gets time to update
it.)anyone else ask and ye shall receive.
I have only been in L.A. for a few months living on my own; ok not so on my own I have Angel and Doyle. What I should actually be saying is I have been out of Sunnyhell away from all that crap for only a few months; and now I am going back, back to see him, Xander Lavelle Harris, the boy I tormented, the boy I loved.
When I first told Doyle I was going back to see him I saw a twinge of jealousy on his face. I explained why I had to go back and of course he understood. Angel and Doyle said they wanted to come with me, but I told them what I have to say is between me and Xander. So here I am driving down the highway back to good ole' Sunnydale. Each mile closer to Sunnydale I get the more memories come flooding back like the one time I sprained my ankle at cheerleading practice and when I got home my room was covered with flowers. What made it even more special was that they were hand picked. Of course I didn't tell Xander that I just yelled him for making a mess in my room. He knew how grateful I was though he looked up at me with that smirk on his face. It's strange how at one point in time something can make you smile and at another point it can bring tears to your eyes.
SUNNYDALE 10 mls; now the really bad memories are coming into play like the night I saw him and Willow kiss. My heart is beginning to beat faster and faster at the thought of seeing them all again. I keep telling myself this is something I have to do; I have to tell Xander how I feel so I can move on. SUNNYDALE KEEP RIGHT; now all the memories and feelings are coming back at once. Be strong Cordy don't crack, but it's to late by the time I pass the Bronze streams of tears are rolling down my face. I turn into the parking lot of the place I have strangely become familiar to over the years; park the car; take a deep breathe; and walk in.
I see them "the scooby gang" all assembled with some new faces they don't say anything though; they look at me and look at Xander then leave the room knowing we have to be alone. I walk over to him taking his hand:
"Hey Xan long time no see. We have some things to settle; some things we
put off talking about for way too long, but things that need to be said. Xander
you broke my heart that night at the factory; and I broke your heart by shutting
you out afterwards; by not accepting your apologies. Xander I forgive you
and I hope you can forgive me for everything I did to you. I didn't hurt you
beacause I hated you, but becuase I loved you so much. I loved you more
than I have ever loved anyone in my life; and part of me will always love you.
I am finally getting on with my life; I met this guy,well half guy half demon,
named Doyle; and he looks at me the way you did. So I know he cares about
me. I wish you would say something ,but I know you can't."
I lean down to kiss him on the cheek and I can see the marks from the chord
around his neck; couldn't they have done a better job with his make-up. I have been sitting here crying for I don't know how long; and they tell me it's time to close the casket, but I can't let go of him. I hear someone say it's time princess; I turn and bury my head in Doyle's chest. I look up between sobs and ask why, but everyone shakes their heads. The only person that knows the answer to that question is lying in the casket that is know being loaded into the hearse. All any of us knows is that we will never see Xander's smirk again and we hate to think about living in a world without it.
The End
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