OUR MEN IN RED, WHITE & BLUE (BILLS) 34
THOSE OTHER GUYS IN THE SAME COLORS (NY) 21
The big question in Tampa during Super Bowl week was "where is Marv Levy?" He was laying low, staying out of sight, avoiding all reporters. Come game time, he was nowhere to be seen. During the introductions of the Bills players, up the ramp and onto the playing field came this boxed object on wheels. It looked like a motorized telephone booth with stars, stripes and a Bills logo on it! As it glided over to the Bills bench, you could see a TV camera mounted on top of it, along with a mini satellite dish. Inside this weird contraption was Mysterious Marv himself. He was going to avoid the press at all costs. The only people he was going to communicate to were his players. A light rain was falling at game time, and the temperature dropped sharply after the opening kickoff.
The Bills no-huddle offense struck quickly again, taking a 10-0 lead on its first two possessions. but then rain changed to snow and all the spectators went home, except for the 20,000 fans from Buffalo and New York City. This was the first time it had ever snowed in Tampa this century! People were blaming it on the Buffalo Bills for bringing their weather with them. With the snow coming down, the Giants started moving the ball. O.J. Anderson took a pass 56 yards for a TD. Lawrence Taylor intercepted a pass to set up another touchdown. At halftime, it was snowing so bad that snow plows had to plow the field (these had to be flown in from Atlanta and were dropped into the stadium via parachutes). Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck, slated to perform during the halftime extravaganza, instead had to drive around the field on the snow plows, clearing the snow.
Snow was unheard of in Tampa, but the Bills and Giant fans made the most of it by having a massive snowball war in the stands. One crazed Bill fan took off all his clothes except for his designer AFC Buffalo Bill briefs, streaked across the football field. He jumped onto the goal posts and hung upside down by his feet on the cross bar. He peeled a banana and ate it, literally going "APE" over the Bills! The Bills came out storming in the second half. Jim Kelly threw a 20-yard pass to James Lofton, who slid on his feet another 40 yards for a TD! James looked like a skater gliding down the ice. When the clock ticked down to the last seconds and the Bills won the Super Bowl, the Buffalo fans go crazy. They tear down the goal posts, rip out the seats and dismantle the entire pressbox! The entire Bills team does the "Bruce Smith Boogaloo" for ten minutes and then they carry the Marv Levy booth into the dressing room. Before leaving the field, Marv's voice blurts from a speaker attached to the booth: "We have fought in the trenches, bombed our enemies with massive air power and have WON THE WAR! My battle plan was successful and we have liberated the Buffalo Bills football fans from being hostages at the hands of the national sports media! The thirty-one years of weather jokes are vanquished!"
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