Turning to the pondering of the day. We all know that this is a Christian Holiday. And my signature represents what a beautiful picture of giving and loving I believe the Christian story tells. HOWEVER...I would like to say something concerning the need for tolerance when it comes to other's beliefs, traditions, and spiritual practices.
When I was a young adult, I experienced what I call, for lack of a better word, a "change" or a "turning around". I had lived my life strictly for myself, for what gains I might have, with many disregardings for others! This selfish, self-centered life had taken me down a path of loneliness and self loathing! I had experienced every known pain, emotional, physical or spiritual. It was time for a change!!!
My parents (adopted), altho, church goers, did not seem to provide the answers I was seeking. Perhaps I did not know the questions to ask. My older sister had been "converted" to a fundamental way of life and encouraged me to follow. I did feel a pull in that direction...a need to find answers to those nagging questions like "who am I?" "Why am I here?" "What purpose is there to all of this?" I did realize that my "sins" were many and knew that I did not want to suffer any consequences....so took the sacrifice of Jesus Christ for payment. I had many years of happiness, both my children were born during this time, my first husband seemed happy in the church and all went very well for about 10 yrs.
During this time I became increasingly dissatisfied with what I termed "intolerance" of others. Many felt that it was "their way or the highway" the ONE WAY theory permeated the teaching I was receiving! BIG problem...I could see others around me, not believing, not interpreting, not practicing the way I was and still they were very happy!!! How could this be? What was providing for them the things I so strongly wanted/needed? Many, many questions!!
I fell away, WAY alway! very unhappy, very sad, very lost!
It has been almost 1 1/2 years now since the possibility of being American Indian first crossed my mind. I never knew! They spoke of a Creator, a living, loving entity whose desire was that we live in peace and harmony with all loving things. Could this be true? YES, this I could do! I could learn to live peaceably with the things around me! But I had to learn! Imagine how I felt the first time I asked a bush if I may rest under it and thanked it for its shade? Imagine how difficult it was to remember to honor Mother Earth and stop littering? These were non-sense to me at first!
But the concept FIT me!! I no longer needed to feel excluded from some group or another. I no longer had to ask "Are you a Christian?" before making a new friend! I no longer has to include only those who believed as I did, into any of my thoughts or activities. I WAS FREE!
Free to love, free to live! I could feel the release of bondage. Bondage of self, bondage of prejudice, bondage of fear that I was different (or that YOU were different) I now know we are NOT different! FREE from it all! and free to tolerate and love others!
We must get along, all of us! man, woman, child, animal, plant, mineral! We are all put here for a reason, none better, non worse. But we all have purposes here! I am just finding mine and this Lodge has indeed helped me do that in a tremendous way! Hugs and love to you all! I am indian, and I am FOUND! thank you! lyte
