Written by: Matt Kiene & Joe Reinkmeyer
Directed by: Bruce Seth Green
Characters, stories, situations, events and dialogue copyright © 1997 Twentieth Century Fox Television and its related entities.
~~~~~~~~~~ Disclaimer ~~~~~~~~~~
I do not own the characters in this story, nor do I own any rights to the television show "Buffy the Vampire Slayer". They were created by Joss Whedon and belong to him, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar Television, Kuzui Enterprises, 20th Century Fox Television and the WB Television Network.
This is a straightforward and dry transcript of the episode "The Pack".
~~~~~~~~~~ Prologue ~~~~~~~~~~
In every generation there is a Chosen One. She alone will stand against the vampires, the demons and the forces of darkness. She is the Slayer.
The Sunnydale Zoo. A sign points to the reptiles, elephants and the Hyena House. The camera pans down from the sign to Buffy walking along the path by herself. Kyle and his gang, Rhonda, Tor and Heidi, see her coming.
Kyle: Oh, look. It’s Buffy and all her friends.
Buffy: That’s a witty.
Tor: Do you ever wonder why nobody cool wants to hang out with you?
Buffy: Just thankful.
Rhonda: Were you this popular at your old school? Before you got kicked out?
The group laughs, and they continue on their way, leaving Buffy standing there alone.
Tor: (at Buffy as they leave) Careful! She might beat you up!
Cut to the elephants. Buffy is reading the plaque when Xander and Willow come running up.
Xander: Hey! Buffy!
Willow: You missed it!
Buffy: Missed what?
Xander: We just saw the zebras mating! (nods to Willow) Thank you, very exciting...
Willow: It was like the Heimlich, with stripes!
Buffy: (with mock disappointment) And I missed it. Yet somehow I’ll find the courage to live on. (begins walking)
Willow: (follows) Where were you?
Buffy: Uh, I was looking at the fishes.
Willow: Was it cool?
Buffy: It was fishes.
Xander: I’m feelin’ that you’re not in the field trip spirit here.
Buffy: Well, it would... It’s nothing, I... We do the same zoo trip at my old school every year. Same old, same old.
Xander: Buffy, this isn’t just about looking at a bunch of animals. This is about not being in class!
Buffy: (brightens) You know, you’re right! Suddenly the animals look shiny and new.
Xander: Gotta have perspective.
Cut to the monkeys. Lance is sketching them into his notebook. Kyle and his cronies approach him.
Kyle: Lance! How’s it goin’?
Lance: Hey, Kyle.
Kyle: So, is this like a, uh, family reunion?
Lance: No.
Kyle: I think it’s a family reunion. It’s so... touching. Doesn’t anybody have a camera? (makes a sudden photo-taking gesture) Whapish!
Rhonda: (behind Lance) Hey, does your mom still pick out your lice, or are you old enough to do that yourself now?
Lance: Quit it, huh? (Tor takes his notebook) Hey! Guys, c’mon! It’s got my notes in there!
Mr. Flutie: (sees the commotion) What’s going on here? I’ve had it up to here with you four! What’re you doing?
Kyle: Nothing.
Mr. Flutie: Did I ask you to speak? Okay, I guess I did, but I want the truth. Lance?
Lance: They weren’t doing anything. Really! (lets out a nervous laugh) We were just playin’ around.
Mr. Flutie: Alright. (starts away, but turns back) I’ll be watching you. (leaves)
Kyle: (points at Lance) You! Came through big time.
Rhonda: Way to go, Lance! (pats his shoulder)
Tor: Flutie’s been looking for a reason to come down on us.
Lance: It’s okay.
Kyle: Come on, we’re gonna check out the Hyena House.
Lance: But I think it’s off-limits.
Kyle: And therein, my friend, lies the fun.
Lance laughs, and they all go off toward the Hyena House.
Cut to the Hyena House. It’s closed, but they duck underneath the yellow barricade tape. Buffy, Willow and Xander see them go in.
Willow: What are Kyle and his buds doing with Lance?
Xander: Oh, playing with him as a cat plays with a mouse.
Buffy: What is it with those guys?
Willow: They’re obnoxious. Professionally.
Xander: Well, every school has ‘em. So, you start a new school, you get your desks, some blackboards and some mean kids.
Buffy: Yeah, well, I’d better extract Lance before...
Xander: (interrupts) I’ll handle it. This job doesn’t require actual slaying. (goes in)
Buffy: You don’t think we should follow?
Willow: Kyle and those guys are jerks, but they’re all talk. Mostly.
Buffy: (reconsiders) Why don’t we...
Willow: Yeah, why don’t we?
They duck under the tape and start in, but are caught in the act by a zookeeper.
Zookeeper: Oh, hold it, hold it, are you blind, or are you just illiterate? Because hyenas are very quick to prey on the weak.
Buffy: Oh, w-we were just gonna take...
Zookeeper: You’re not going in there. Anyone that does is in a world of trouble.
Willow: No, no one’s going in there. (she and Buffy come back out)
Buffy: Why is it off-limits?
Zookeeper: It’s a quarantine. These hyenas just came in from Africa, so keep out. (cocks his eyebrow) Even if they call your name.
Buffy: What are you talking about?
Zookeeper: The Masai tribesmen told me that hyenas are capable of understanding human speech. They follow humans around by day, learning their names. At night, when the campfire dies, they call out to a person. Once they separate him, the pack (snaps his fingers) devours them.
Cut inside the Hyena House. Kyle and the others tear through more tape blocking the way in and look around.
Kyle: Cool!
He and the girls walk up to the enclosure and look in. Lance stays back with Tor behind him.
Lance: I don’t see any hyenas.
One of the hyenas growls and shows itself between some rocks.
Lance: Okay! Now we’ve seen it.
He tries to leave, but Tor stops him.
Rhonda: Looks cute.
Kyle: I think it looks hungry. (moves toward Lance)
He and Tor grab Lance.
Lance: No!
Tor: C’mon, Spot!
Lance: C’mon, stop it!
Tor: Supper time!
They drag him up the steps and lift him up to the bars.
Lance: Guys! Stop! It’s not funny!
They press him into the bars and down on his neck.
Lance: Ow! Stop it! It’s not funny!
Xander comes in, pulls their arms off of him and helps him away.
Xander: (to Kyle) Why don’t you pick on somebody your own species?
Kyle: What, are you gonna get in my face?
The hyenas growl. Xander, Kyle and the others look at them. The hyena’s eyes flash green, and then two of the kid’s eyes do. The hyena’s eyes flash green again, and two more kid’s eyes do. Cut to a shot from above of the sacred circle painted on the floor.
Cut to Lance. He makes an anxious move to get away, but trips on a chair and falls. His notebook skids across the floor to the far wall. Kyle and the others turn and laugh when they see him. Lance gets up, retrieves his notebook and rushes out. Xander turns around now, too, and his eyes flash green.
Opening credits roll. Buffy’s theme plays.
~~~~ Commercial break ~~~~
The Bronze. Cut inside. Willow and Buffy are coming from the bar. Buffy has a Coke and a croissant. They make their way over to an empty table.
Willow: I thought Xander would be here by now.
Buffy: Hmm, that’d make him on time. We couldn’t have that!
Willow: Did he seem upset at all on the bus back from the zoo?
Buffy: About what?
Willow: I dunno. He was quiet.
Buffy: I didn’t notice anything. (they sit) But then again I’m not as hyperaware of him as, oh, say, for example, you.
Willow: Hyperaware?
Buffy: Well, I’m not constantly monitoring his health, his moods, his blood pressure...
Willow: (grins) 130 over 80!
Buffy: (amused) You got it bad, girl!
Willow: He makes my head go tingly. You know what I mean?
Buffy: I dimly recall.
Willow: But it hasn’t happened to you lately?
Buffy: Not of late.
Willow: Not even for a dangerous and mysterious older man whose leather jacket you’re wearing right now?
Buffy: (in mock annoyance) Goes with the shoes!
Willow: Come on, Angel pushes your buttons. You know he does.
Buffy: I suppose some girls might find him good looking... (gets a look from Willow) ...if they have eyes, alright, he’s a honey, but... it’s just he’s never around, and when he is, all he wants to do is talk about vampires, and... I, I just can’t have a relationship...
Willow: (sees Xander) There he is!
Buffy: Angel?
Willow: Xander!
He walks into the club and checks out a girl on the way. She stares after him. He comes up to their table.
Xander: Girls!
Buffy: Boy!
Xander: Sorry I’m late, I... just forgot that we were gonna be here. (sees Buffy’s croissant) Hungry! (tears a piece off and eats it)
Willow: Xander, you still want me to help you with geometry tomorrow? (Xander takes a swig of Buffy’s cola) We can work after class...
Xander: (gives Willow a thumbs-up) Yeah. (to Buffy) What is this crap?
Buffy: Well, it was my buttery croissant.
Xander: Man, I need some food! Birds live on this!
Buffy and Willow look at each other and then at Xander. He looks back and forth at them.
Xander: What?
Buffy: What’s up with you?
Willow: Is something wrong? Did I do something?
Xander: (to Willow) What could you possibly do? That’s crazy talk. I’m just... restless.
Willow: Well, we could go to the ice cream place...
Xander: (points to the table) I like it here.
He looks up and scans the area a bit, and then leans toward Buffy and sniffs her hair.
Buffy: Okay, now what?
Xander: You took a bath.
Buffy: Yeah, I-I often do, I’m actually known for it.
Xander: That’s okay.
Willow and Buffy exchange another look.
Buffy: And the weird behavior award of the year goes to...
Xander sees Kyle and the others come in. Buffy sees them, too. "Reluctant Man", by Sprung Monkey, starts to play.
Lyrics: Oh, Reluctant Man
Buffy: Oh, great. It’s the winged monkeys.
Kyle and company come over to them.
Lyrics: Who’s afraid to touch the world / Why are you hiding? / What is the base of all your fears?
Xander stares back at them.
Lyrics: Do you find yourself in a cold cruel world
Kyle stops at their table, and he and Xander stare each other down.
Lyrics: Dark and desperate, scared and lonely?
They go around to another table that’s occupied.
Lyrics: Selfish Man / Who never gave to no one else / What are you holding? / Is it worth the price you pay?
Kyle: (to the boy at the table) Y’know, I don’t understand why you’re sitting at our table.
Lyrics: ‘Cause your eyes they see just what you want to see
Rhonda: Yeah, shouldn’t you be hovering over the football stadium with ‘Goodyear’ written on you?
Lyrics: And I hope they’re not staring blindly at me
They all laugh. Xander was watching and laughs also as he turns back to Buffy. He stops laughing when he sees she doesn’t think it’s funny.
Xander: Kid’s fat.
Cut to the school. Cut to the library. Giles is wearing protective gear while Buffy trains on him. She does a roundhouse kick followed by a high punch and a swinging middle punch to Giles’ gloved hands. She continues, doing a full spin and finishing with a backhand punch. She does a full spinning jumping high wheel kick followed by a right middle punch, a high roundhouse kick and a front snap kick. Then she jumps high and does a twin straddle kick. She lands back on her feet and moves in to attack again, when Giles suddenly jumps back.
Giles: Right! (Buffy stops short) That’s enough training for one day.
Buffy: Well, that last roundhouse was kinda sloppy. Are you sure you don’t wanna do it again?
Giles: (out of breath) No! No, no, that’s fine. You just... run along to class. (Buffy goes) (to himself) While I wait for the feeling to return to my arms.
Cut to the halls. Herbert the mascot has gotten loose. The students in the hall are startled and try to get away. Mr. Flutie chases the pig.
Mr. Flutie: Look out! It’s gotten loose!
The camera dodges the students’ legs from Herbert’s point of view. Buffy comes around the corner, reacts quickly to catch him and picks him up.
Mr. Flutie: Lordy, Herbert! Gave Mr. Flutie quite a scare, didn’t he? Students, I’d like you all to met Herbert, our new mascot for the Sunnydale High Razorbacks!
The students all clap.
Buffy: He’s so cute!
Mr. Flutie: He’s not cute. No! He’s a fierce Razorback! (more clapping)
Buffy: He doesn’t look mean, Mr. Flutie.
Mr. Flutie: He’s mean, he’s ready for action! See? (indicates Herbert’s helmet with foam tusks) Here are the tusks... (gestures at a piece of serrated green foam tied to Herbert’s back) the scary Razorback!
Buffy: You’re right. He’s a fine mascot and will engender school spirit.
Mr. Flutie: Uh, he better. Costs a fortune to feed him. (to Herbert) Alright, let’s get you back into your cage.
Herbert squeals when Buffy wants to hand him to Mr. Flutie.
Mr. Flutie: (points behind himself) This way.
Cut outside to Willow helping Xander with his geometry.
Xander: I’m not getting this.
Willow: It’s simple, really. See, ‘The bisector of a vertex is the line that divides the angle at that vertex into two equal parts.’
Xander: It’s like a big blur, all these numbers and angles.
Willow: It’s the same stuff from last week. You had it down then.
Xander: Why do I need to learn this?
Willow: ‘Cause otherwise you’ll flunk math?
Xander: Explain the part where that’s bad. (rubs the bridge of his nose)
Willow: You remember, you fail math, you flunk out of school, you end up being the guy at the pizza place that sweeps the floor and says, ‘Hey, kids, where’s the cool parties this weekend?’ We’ve been through this. (Xander rubs his right temple) Do you have a headache? (reaches up to him)
Xander: (shakes her off) Yeah, and I think I know what’s causing it. (throws his geometry book into the trash) Ah! That’s better, it goes right to the source of the pain.
Willow: Xander...
Xander: (frustrated) Look, forget it, okay? I don’t get it. I won’t ever. (gets up) I don’t care.
He throws his math notebook into Willow’s lap and leaves in a huff.
Willow: (watches Xander go) We can finish this another time.
Cut to the halls. Buffy follows Mr. Flutie to the faculty room with Herbert in her arms. They stop outside.
Mr. Flutie: See, the problem is you kids today have no school spirit. Hold on, let me get his outfit off. (removes it) Today it’s all gangs and drugs and those movies on Showtime with the nudity. (Buffy gives him a look) I don’t have cable, I only heard. When I was your age we cared about the school’s reputation and the football team’s record, all that stuff! Of course, when I was your age I was surrounded by old guys telling me how much better things were when they were my age. (goes into the faculty room)
Buffy: (to Herbert) Yeah!
Xander comes into the hall from outside. Herbert squeals and reacts to his presence as he walks by. Buffy looks confused as she watches Xander pass, and tries to keep Herbert from jumping out of her arms.
Cut outside. Lightning strikes. Cut to the gym.
Coach Harrold: Alright, it’s raining, all regular gym classes have been postponed, so you know what that means: (holds up a large rubber ball) dodgeball! Now, for those of you that may have forgotten, the rules are as follows: you dodge.
He tosses the ball to Buffy. He blows his whistle, and the two groups move back from center court. He whistles again and the ball throwing commences. Xander nails his first victim. Buffy and the pack members easily dodge the balls.
The coach enjoys the game from the sidelines. Xander nails another victim. The coach continues to watch. Buffy throws a ball and hits her mark. Xander throws again and nails Willow hard on the back. She gives him a hurt and confused look as she walks off of the court. Xander catches a ball as he watches Willow go, but soon continues the game. Willow sits down, crosses her arms and keeps looking at him.
A few seconds later just the pack and Lance are left on one side, Buffy on the other. The pack looks at her briefly, then focuses on Lance. He falls to the floor and cowers as they each throw their ball at him hard. Buffy runs over and helps Lance up. She stares at Xander. He stares back. She watches as he and the others leave.
Coach Harrold: God, this game is brutal. I love it!
Cut to the halls. Willow is waiting for Xander, and goes up to him when he comes from the other hall with the pack.
Willow: Xander... What’s wrong with you?
He looks at the others briefly and pulls Willow aside.
Xander: I guess you’ve noticed that I’ve been different around you lately.
Willow: Yes.
Xander: I think, um... I think it’s because my feelings for you have been changing.
Buffy comes around the corner to her locker and sees them. She works the combination.
Xander: And, well, we’ve been friends for such a long time that I feel like I need to tell you something.
Willow looks at him expectantly.
Xander: I’ve, um... I’ve decided to drop geometry. So I won’t be needing your math help anymore. Which means I won’t have to look at your pasty face again.
He and the others laugh. Willow is crushed. She turns and leaves. Buffy watches her quickly walk by. She slams her locker and approaches Xander with her arms crossed.
He stops laughing.
Buffy: You gonna say something to me?
Xander just looks at her and starts laughing again more loudly. He goes back to the pack, and they leave. Buffy goes after Willow.
Cut outside. The pack walks along. Xander stops and sniffs the air.
Xander: Dogs!
Kyle: Where?
Xander leads them to a group of three boys sitting at a table.
Boy#1: You’re out of your mind, that’s no way to play guitar.
Boy#2: What are you talking about?
Boy#1: I mean, that’s just hunt and peck!
Boy#2: It’s not!
Boy#1: (the pack arrives) Hey, Xander, you’ve heard Wretched Refuse play, what do you think of the guy who plays lead?
Tor reaches for Boy#1’s hotdog. Heidi takes Boy#2’s hotdog.
Boy#1: Hey. Hey, what are you guys...
Rhonda: Shut up.
Kyle: You’re sharing.
Xander: Friends like to share. (to Tor and Heidi) Good?
Tor: It’s too well-done.
He throws the rest of the hotdog back on Boy#1’s lunch, Heidi back on Boy#2’s.
Boy#1: Hey! That is not cool.
Xander sniffs the air again and looks in the scent’s direction. He leads them off. Kyle climbs onto the table and stomps the boys’ lunches.
Boy#1: Hey!
Cut to the faculty room. They all come in. Xander inhales deeply through his nose. The other two boys go to close the blinds. They all approach the cage. Xander bends down to look at Herbert.
Xander: Let’s do lunch.
The pig becomes nervous and squeals.
~~~~ Commercial break ~~~~
Outside at school. Xander and the pack come walking in slow motion up the stairs from below the administrative offices to the quad. Several students stare at them as they walk by. “Job’s Eyes”, by Far, plays as background music.
Lyrics: I’m sure this rain won’t last / I’m sure its time is up / Though it’s pouring down
Lance walks by and just stops in front of them. They look at him and Xander sniffs him, but they keep walking right by.
Lyrics: I’m sure this rain won’t last / And it falls on Job’s eyes / This water of doubt / And I’m wading in lies / It’s wearing me out / But if you want it, alright / I’ll buy it / I’ll buy it / I’ll buy it / I’ll buy it / I’ll buy it / I’ll...
Xander notices Buffy and Willow sitting and talking on the balcony above. His hearing has become sensitive and he overhears.
Willow: I’ve known him my whole life, Buffy.
Cut to the girls. Willow: (tears in her eyes) Well, we haven’t always been close, but he’s never... (exhales)
Buffy: I think something’s wrong with him.
Willow: Or maybe there’s something wrong with me.
Buffy: What are you talking about?
Willow: C’mon. He’s not picking on you. He’s just sniffing you a lot. I don’t know, maybe three isn’t company anymore.
Buffy: You think this has something to do with me?
Willow: Of course.
Buffy: No. That still doesn’t explain why he’s hanging out with the dode patrol. (hops off the railing) Something’s going on. Something weird. (starts to go)
Willow: What’re you gonna do?
Buffy: Talk to the expert on weird.
Cut to the library. Giles is going about his work. Buffy follows him as they talk.
Giles: Xander’s taken to teasing the less fortunate?
Buffy: Uh-huh.
Giles: And, there’s been a noticeable change in both clothing and demeanor?
Buffy: Yes.
Giles: And, well, otherwise all his spare time is spent lounging about with imbeciles.
Buffy: It’s bad, isn’t it.
Giles: It’s devastating. He’s turned into a sixteen-year-old boy. Course, you’ll have to kill him.
Buffy: Giles, I’m serious.
Giles: So am I. Except for the part about killing him. Testosterone is a great equalizer. It turns all men into morons. He will, however, get over it.
Buffy: (exasperated) I cannot believe that you, of all people, are trying to Scully me. There is something supernatural at work here. (grabs some books) Get your books! Look stuff up!
Giles: (takes the books) Look under what?
Buffy: I don’t know. (exhales) That’s your department.
Giles: The evidence that you’ve presented me with is sketchy at best.
Buffy: He scared the pig. (Giles gives her a look) Well, he did...
Giles: Buffy, boys can be cruel. They tease, they, they, they prey on the weak. I-i-it’s natural teen behavior pattern.
Buffy: What did you just say?
Giles: Um, they tease.
Buffy: They prey on the weak. I’ve heard that somewhere bef... (it clicks in her mind) Xander has been acting totally wiggy ever since we went to the zoo. Him and Kyle and all those guys, they went into the hyena cage. Oh, God, that laugh...
Giles: You’re saying that, uh, Xander’s becoming a hyena.
Buffy: I don’t know. Or been possessed by one? Not just Xander, all of them.
Giles: Well, I-I-I’ve cer-certainly never heard of, uh...
Willow: (comes into the library) Herbert! They found him.
Buffy: The pig?
Willow: Dead. And also eaten. Principal Flutie’s freaking out.
Buffy: (to Giles) Testosterone, huh?
Giles heads towards his office.
Willow: What’re you gonna do?
Giles: Get my books. Look stuff up.
Cut outside. Mr. Flutie is walking angrily. He sees Kyle and the others. Xander isn’t with them. Mr. Flutie approaches them.
Mr. Flutie: (angry) You four!
Kyle: What?
Mr. Flutie: Oh, don’t think I don’t know. Three kids saw you outside Herbert’s room. You’re busted! Yeah! You’re goin’ down.
Rhonda: How is Herbert?
Heidi: Crunchy!
They all laugh. Mr. Flutie is incensed.
Mr. Flutie: That’s it! My office, right now. (they laugh more) Now!
They stop laughing. Kyle gets off of the table and indicates for the others to follow.
Mr. Flutie: You’re gonna have so much detention, your grandchildren’ll be staying after school.
Cut to the library. Willow is at the table researching. Buffy is on the stairs behind her with a book.
Buffy: Wow! Apparently Noah rejected the hyenas from the Ark because he thought they were an evil impure mixture of dogs and cats.
Willow: Hyenas aren’t well liked.
Buffy: They do seem to be the schmoes of the animal kingdom. (comes over to Willow)
Willow: Why couldn’t Xander be possessed by a puppy or, or some ducks?
Buffy: That’s assuming ‘possession’ is the right word.
Giles: (comes over from the cage) Oh, I’ll say it is. The Masai of the Serengeti have spoken of animal possession for, for generations. I... I should have remembered that.
Buffy: So how does it work?
Giles: Well, apparently there’s a, a sect of animal worshipers known as Primals. They believe that humanity, uh, consciousness, uh, the soul, is a, is a perversion, a dilution of spirit. Uh, to them the animal state is holy. They are able, through trans-possession, to, to, um, draw the spirit of certain animals into themselves.
Buffy: And then they started acting like hyenas.
Giles: Well, only the most predatory of animals are, are of interest to the Primals, so, uh, yes, yes, that would fit, yes.
Buffy: So, what happens to the person once the spirit’s in them?
Giles: If it goes unchecked...
He hands Buffy a book open to a certain page. She takes one look, slams the book shut and quickly gets up to go.
Buffy: I gotta find Xander.
Willow picks up the book and opens it to the bookmark. There’s a drawing of people with limbs bitten off, heads missing and other massive injuries.
Cut to the faculty room. Herbert’s cage has been mangled. Buffy comes in and looks around. She inspects the cage.
Buffy: (exhales) They are strong.
She steps on something that crunches and crouches down to the floor. She finds parts of Herbert, some vertebrae and other bones. She picks up a rib. Xander comes in and stands behind her. Buffy gets back up and turns around, only to be startled by him.
Buffy: Xander.
She tries to evade him, but he’s quick to match her movement.
Buffy: (exhales) This is ridiculous. We need to talk.
She fakes him out and jumps on him, knocking him down with her on top holding down his arms.
Xander: (smiles) Been waitin’ for you to jump my bones.
Cut to Mr. Flutie’s office. He stands in front of his desk and lectures Kyle and his friends.
Mr. Flutie: I have seen some sick things in my life! Believe me! But this is beyond the pale! What is it with you people?
The pack starts to whine and stalk him.
Mr. Flutie: Is it drugs? How could you? A poor defenseless pig? (notices their behavior) What are you doing?
Cut to the faculty room. Xander growls and rolls Buffy over onto her back so he’s on top now and has her arms pinned down.
Buffy: Get off of me.
Xander: Is that what you really want? (Buffy struggles a bit) We both know what you really want. You want danger, don’t cha? You like your men dangerous.
Buffy: You’re in trouble, Xander. You are infected with some hyena thing, it’s like a demonic possession!
Xander: Dangerous and mean, right? Like Angel. Your Mystery Guy. Well, guess who just got mean.
Cut to Mr. Flutie’s office. He goes around behind his desk to get away from the pack. They slowly approach.
Mr. Flutie: Now, stop that! You’re only gonna make things worse for yourselves. I tell you how this is gonna work: I am gonna call your parents, and they are gonna take you all home.
He reaches for his phone, but Tor gets his hands on it first and tries to stare him down. Mr. Flutie looks at him a moment and then gestures to be given the phone. Tor gives it to him.
Mr. Flutie: Thank you.
He starts to pull the phone toward himself to dial, but Rhonda tears it away from him and throws it off of the desk.
Rhonda: I’m sorry...
Mr. Flutie: (furiously) That is it!
He tries to get past them, but Kyle growls at him and he falls back into his chair.
Cut to Buffy and Xander. He is still on top of her.
Xander: Do you know how long... I’ve waited... until you’d stop pretending that we aren’t attracted...
Buffy throws him off of her and quickly gets up to face him. He gets up, too, and begins to approach her as she backs away.
Xander: Until Willow... stops kidding herself... that I could settle with anyone but you?
Buffy: Look, Xander, I don’t wanna hurt you...
He grabs her by the shoulders and pushes her against the vending machine.
Xander: Now do you wanna hurt me?
Buffy struggles, but the possessed Xander is too strong.
Xander: Come on, Slayer. I like it when you’re scared.
She struggles a bit more.
Xander: The more I scare you, (sniffs her) the better you smell.
He moves in and kisses her roughly on the neck.
Cut to Mr. Flutie’s office. The pack continues to taunt and sniff him.
Mr. Flutie: You’re about this close to expulsion, people! (gets up) I’m willing to talk to the school counselor, and we can discuss options...
He tries to go again, but Heidi stops him. Tor climbs onto his desk and growls at him.
Mr. Flutie: (angrily) Get down from there this instant!
Rhonda gets in his face and scratches his cheek with her nails. He falls back into his chair with his hand covering his face. He takes his hand away and sees the blood.
Mr. Flutie: (terrified) Are you insane?!
Tor jumps on him from the desk, and the rest of the pack descends on him and begins feeding. The camera closes in on a picture of Mr. Flutie on his desk.
~~~~ Commercial break ~~~~
The library. Willow is watching footage of feeding hyenas on the PC. She looks up when she hears the door open and stops the playback. She sees Buffy dragging Xander into the library and goes over to them.
Buffy: Hurry up. We gotta get him locked up somehow before he comes to.
Willow: Oh, my God, Xander! What happened?
Buffy: I hit him.
Willow: With what?
Buffy: A desk.
Willow opens the cage door, and Buffy drags him in.
Buffy: He tried his hand at felony sexual assault.
Willow: Oh, Buffy, the hyena in him didn’t...
Buffy: No. (they arrange him on the floor of the cage) No, but it’s safe to say that in his animal state his idea of wooing doesn’t involve a Yanni CD and a bottle of Chianti. (locks the cage) There, that oughtta hold him. Where’s Giles?
Willow: He got called to some teacher’s meeting. What are we gonna do? I mean... how do we get Xander back?
Giles comes into the library.
Buffy: Right now I’m a little more worried about what the rest of the pack are up to.
Giles: The rest of the pack were spotted outside Herbert the mascot’s cage. They were sent to the principal’s office.
Willow: Good! That’ll show ‘em. (Giles is silent) Did it show ‘em?
Giles exhales but remains silent, searching for what to say.
Buffy: They didn’t hurt him, did they?
Giles: They, uh... ate him.
Willow has to sit down. She and Buffy can’t believe what they just heard.
Buffy: They ate Principal Flutie?
Willow: Ate him up?
Giles: The, uh, official theory is that wild dogs got into his office somehow. There was no one at the scene.
Willow: But Xander didn’t. (to Buffy) He, he was with you.
Giles: (sees Xander in the cage) Oh! Uh, well, that’s a small mercy.
Buffy: Giles, how do we stop this? How do you trans-possess someone?
Giles: I-I’m afraid I still don’t have all the pieces. Um, the accounts of the Primals and their methods are a bit thin on the ground. There is some talk of a-a-a predatory act, but the exact ritual is, is, um... (thinks, picks up a book) The Malleus Maleficarum deals in particulars of demonic possession, which... may apply... (looks through a few pages) Yes, one, one should be able to transfer the spirits to another human.
Buffy: Oh, that’s great. Any volunteers?
Giles: Oh. Good point.
Buffy: What we need to do is put the hyena back in the hyena.
Giles: B-but until we know more, uh...
Buffy: Betcha that zookeeper could tell us. Maybe he didn’t quarantine those hyenas because they were sick.
Giles: We should talk to him.
Buffy: Okay. (starts to go but stops) Oh, wait, somebody’s gotta watch Xander.
Willow: (gets up) I will.
Buffy: Will, are you sure? If he wakes up...
Willow: (holds her hand out for the keys) I’ll be alright. Go.
After a moment’s hesitation Buffy gives Willow the keys to the cage and grabs her coat.
Buffy: (to Giles) C’mon.
Willow watches them leave, then looks over at Xander in the cage. She slips the keys into her pocket.
Cut outside at night. A young woman with her baby in a backpack walks through some bushes and sees the pack lying on the ground, sleeping after their meal. The pack wakes and sees the woman. She becomes panicy and slowly backs up, almost stepping on Tor. She turns suddenly when she hears him growl. He drools heavily. The members of the pack slowly crawl toward her. The woman finally turns and runs, and the pack lies back down to rest some more.
Cut to the library. Xander wakes up.
Xander: Willow.
She is watching the hyena video again. She stops it and turns to look at him.
Willow: How are you feeling?
Xander: Like somebody hit me with a desk. (looks around) What am I doin’ here?
Willow: (gets up and goes toward the cage) You’re... resting?
Xander: You guys got me locked up now. (stands up)
Willow: ‘Cause you’re sick. Buffy said...
Xander: (interrupts) Oh, yeah. Buffy and her all-purpose solution: punch ‘em out ‘n’ knock ‘em down. I’d love to see what she’d do to somebody who was really sick.
Willow: That’s not fair. Buffy saved both of our lives.
Xander: Before she came here our lives didn’t need that much saving, did they? Weren’t things a lot simpler when it was just you and me?
Willow: (moves closer) Maybe...
Xander: When we were alone together... Willow, I know there’s something wrong with me. I think it’s gettin’ worse. But I can’t just stand around waitin’ for Buffy to decide it’s time to punch me out again. (exhales) Look, I want you to help me. I want you.
Willow: I am helping you.
Xander: (exhales) You’re doing what you’re told.
Willow: Buffy’s trying to help you, too. You know that. Or Xander does.
Xander: Yeah... Buffy’s so selfless. Always thinking of us. Well, if I’m so dangerous, how come she left you alone with me?
Willow: I told her to.
Xander: Why?
Willow: ‘Cause I know you better than she does... and I wanted to be here to see if... you were still you.
Xander: You know I am. Look at me. (long pause) Looook.
Willow: (moves even closer, whispers) Xander...
He makes a grab for her through the book return slot in the cage, but she jerks back in time.
Willow: Now I know.
Xander: (bangs on the cage) LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT!
Cut to the zookeeper’s office.
Zookeeper: The students have been possessed by the hyenas?
Giles: Yes.
Zookeeper: Are you sure?
Buffy: We’re really, really sure.
Giles: Y-you don’t seem enormously surprised by this.
Zookeeper: The zoo imported those hyenas from Africa. There was something strange about them from day one. I did some homework... That particular breed is very rare. Totally vicious. Historically they were worshipped by these guys...
Giles: Primals.
Zookeeper: Yeah! Creepy guys! Now, they had rituals for taking the hyena spirits, but I-I don’t see how that coulda happened to your kids.
Giles: Uh, we don’t know exactly how the ritual works. We know that it involves a, um, um... predatory act and some kind of symbol.
Zookeeper: Predatory act? Of course. That makes sense. Where did you read that?
Giles: Do you have Sherman Jeffries’ work on, on cults and on...
Buffy: (impatiently) Boys?
Giles: Sorry.
Zookeeper: Look.
Giles: (raises his hand slightly) Sorry.
Zookeeper: Look. I think we may have enough information so that together we could pull off a reverse trans-possession.
Buffy: What do we do?
Zookeeper: We’ve gotta get those possessed students over to the hyena cage right away. I’ll meet you there. We can begin the rituals.
Buffy: W-well, we can guarantee one of them, but there are four more, and we have no idea where they are.
Zookeeper: No, I wouldn’t worry about that. After hyenas feed and rest they will track the missing member of their pack until they find him. They should come right to you.
Buffy: (worried) Willow!
Cut to the library. Willow is watching the hyena video again. Xander paces in the cage.
Xander: Willow...
Willow: I’m not listening.
Cut to the small arched windows high up on the wall. Kyle appears at one, Heidi at the other.
Kyle: Wiiillooow...
~~~~ Commercial break ~~~~
The library. Kyle is looking in through the window.
Kyle: Wiiillooow...
Willow: (turns to the cage) Xander, shut up!
Kyle: Wiiillooow...
She looks up at the window where the sound is coming from, sees Kyle and startles. Kyle and Heidi kick in the windows. Willow gets up and runs from the library. The pack comes in as Xander kicks and pounds at the cage. Kyle manages to bend over the corner of the door. The others start banging at the cage, too.
Cut to the hall. Willow stops at the intersection.
Cut to the library. The pack pulls down the door, freeing Xander. They whine and sniff each other.
Cut to the hall. Willow runs to a door and tries it, but finds it locked.
Cut to the library. Xander looks toward the library doors and begins tracking Willow. The others follow.
Cut to the hall. Willow runs to another door on the other side of the hall and finds it open. She goes in and closes the door behind her. The pack reaches the hall intersection and sniffs around for Willow’s scent.
Cut inside the classroom. Willow hides under the teacher’s desk.
Cut to the hall. The pack splits up and begins searching for Willow. Xander and Heidi come down the hall. He keeps sniffing. He looks at the door that Willow went through and goes into the classroom with Heidi. Willow stays quiet under the desk. Xander looks around and sees nothing. He motions with his head for them to leave.
When Willow hears the door close she comes out from under the desk. She looks toward the door, sees Xander and screams as she jumps back against the window blinds. Xander growls and leaps over the desk at her. She runs around the desk to get away and tips over a student desk to block Xander’s way. He comes after her and trips over the desk. Willow runs out of the door, but is met by Heidi. Buffy comes up behind Heidi and hits her on the back with a fire extinguisher, knocking her down and out. Willow comes out of the room and goes over to Giles. Xander has gotten up and rushes Buffy. She kicks him, and he falls in the hall outside the classroom also. Buffy discards the extinguisher. The other three pack members appear at the end of the hall.
Giles: Run!
They come running. Giles and Willow run back into the classroom, and Buffy follows, closing and locking the door behind her. The pack pounds on the door but can’t get in and soon leaves.
Buffy: I think they’re going.
Willow: They could be faking it.
Buffy: No, they’re hungry. They’ll be looking for somebody weak. I’m really sorry, Will. I didn’t know they were gonna come after Xander.
Willow: (shaken) It’s okay.
Giles: We must lead them back to the zoo if we’re going to stop this.
Buffy: And before their next meal. Guess that’s my job.
Giles: Well, individually they’re almost as strong as you. As a group they’re...
Buffy: They’re tough, but I think they’re getting stupider. You guys go to the zoo and I will bring them to you. (leaves)
Cut to a house where a family is coming out.
Mr. Anderson: I didn’t say she looks better than you, I said she looks better.
Mrs. Anderson: I heard what I heard. (to her son) Joey, chew! You have to chew or you’ll choke!
They get into their Jeep.
Mr. Anderson: I don’t see why we have to have this conversation every time we see them.
Mrs. Anderson: I didn’t start it. (puts on her seatbelt)
Mr. Anderson: (looks at the ignition) Damn. Where are the keys?
Mrs. Anderson: Huh?
They hear Joey’s name being called from outside and begin to look around. Kyle looks down from the Jeep’s roof into Joey’s window. The mother screams. Two others climb onto the hood and slap the windshield. Xander is at the window opposite Kyle. They all pound on the car.
Mr. Anderson: What going on?! Hey! Get off! Get off of there!
Xander breaks the window with his elbow.
Joey: Get away!
Xander growls and reaches in for Joey. His mother reaches back to try to protect him.
Mrs. Anderson: Joey! Joey! Joey!
Buffy comes running up, grabs Rhonda and throws her off of the hood to the ground. She climbs to the roof and does an in-to-out crescent kick, knocking Kyle off. She looks down at Xander’s feet sticking out of the window.
Mrs. Anderson: Joey!
Buffy: Didn’t your mom teach you? (Xander hears her) Don’t play with your food.
Xander crawls out and looks up at her. The pack gathers around him and looks up at her. She straightens up and puts her hands on her hips.
Buffy: C’mon. You know what you want.
She turns, jumps off of the car and starts running down the street. The pack gives chase.
Cut to the Hyena House. Giles and Willow arrive at a run.
Willow: The pathway to the Hyena House. Where’s the zookeeper?
Giles: Uh, he must be inside. I-I’ll go in and prepare things. You just warn, uh, us when you hear Buffy and the others approaching.
He runs in. Willow turns around to watch and wait.
Cut to Buffy running through a stand of trees. The pack is close behind.
Cut inside the Hyena House. Giles ducks under the tape and comes into the main area.
Giles: Doctor? Uh... Zookeeper?
He hears a door close and is startled by the zookeeper. He is all made up.
Giles: Oh! Oh, of course, the, uh, Masai ceremonial garb. Yes... Very good. Are you, uh, otherwise prepared for the trans-possession?
Zookeeper: (nods) Almost.
Giles: (notices the markings on the floor) Oh, right! The, uh, sacred circle. Yes, you’d need that to, um... This would be here when... when the children first came. Why would you... (figures it out, exhales) How terribly frustrating for you, that a bunch of school children could accomplish what you could not.
Zookeeper: It bothered me. But the power will be mine.
Giles tries to get away, but the zookeeper hits him in the gut with his staff and again on the back, knocking him out. He tosses the staff aside and drags Giles away.
Cut to Buffy, still running through the trees. Cut to outside the Hyena House. Willow hears them coming and runs in. Cut inside.
Willow: They’re almost here! Giles! Giles! (sees the zookeeper) Where are the hyenas for the trans-possession?
Zookeeper: They’re right here in the feeding area.
Willow runs to see the hyenas, but he stops her.
Zookeeper: Stay back! They haven’t been fed.
Willow: Where’s Giles?
Zookeeper: He’s... laying in wait.
Willow: They’re almost here. Shouldn’t you bring the hyenas out?
Zookeeper: When the time is right. I’m gonna need your help. (begins binding her wrists)
Cut outside. Buffy comes running in.
Buffy: They’re right behind me!
Cut inside.
Willow: That’s Buffy! Get ready!
The zookeeper takes Willow and positions her in front of him.
Zookeeper: Here.
Willow: What is this?
Zookeeper: A predatory act, remember? (holds a knife to her throat)
Willow: Uh, right. You’ll pretend to slash my throat and, and put the evil in the hyenas?
Zookeeper: Something like that.
Willow realizes the zookeeper has other intentions. Buffy comes running in, but stops short when she sees Willow being held by the zookeeper.
Willow: Buffy, it’s a trap!
Xander grabs Buffy from behind and they fall to the floor. The others come in and get on top of her, too.
Zookeeper: YU BA YA SA NA!
The pack looks up at him, and their eyes all flash green. Then the zookeeper’s eyes flash green. He turns to Willow and growls. He drops the knife, grabs her head and moves in to bite her.
Xander: Willow!
He gets up and charges the zookeeper, knocking him down and away from Willow. The pack gets off of Buffy. The zookeeper gets up and punches Xander. Buffy gets up and punches the zookeeper. Kyle and his gang see the fight and begin to crawl away on their butts. The zookeeper charges Buffy, but she knocks him back down. He charges her again, and she tosses him over onto his back. He gets up and tries again. Buffy gets under him and throws him up and into the hyena pit. He tries to climb out, but is dragged back down by the hyenas. Kyle and company get up and scramble away. Buffy runs to the pit to see if she can save the zookeeper, but she’s too late. She looks away as Xander comes over to untie Willow. Giles comes out of the back room.
Giles: Uh, did I miss anything?
Cut to the school the next day. The shot from the balcony shows Buffy, Willow and Xander walking across the quad.
Willow: I heard the vice-principal’s taking over till they can find a replacement.
Buffy: It shouldn’t be too hard to find a new principal. Unless they ask what happened to the last one.
Xander: Okay, but I had nothing to do with that, right?
They start to climb the stairs.
Buffy: Oh, right.
Willow: You only ate the pig.
Xander: I ate a pig? Was it cooked and called bacon or...
The girls shake their heads.
Xander: (covering his face) Oh, my God! I ate a pig? I mean, the whole trichinosis issue aside, yuck!
Buffy: Well, it wasn’t really you.
Xander: Well, I remember I was goin’ on the field trip, and then goin’ down to the Hyena House, and next thing some guy’s holding Willow and he’s got a knife.
Willow: You saved my life.
Xander: Hey! Nobody messes with my Willow. (gives her a hug)
Buffy looks on and smiles. Willow smiles, too.
Buffy: This is definitely the superior Xander. Accept no substitutes.
Xander: I didn’t do anything else, did I, around you guys or anything embarrassing?
The girls smile, and Buffy considers what to tell him.
Buffy: (shakes her head) Nah!
Willow: Not at all.
Buffy: (to Willow) C’mon. We’re gonna be late. (takes her hand and they go)
Willow: (to Xander) See you at lunch.
Xander: Cool! Oh, hey, goin’ vegetarian! Huh?
He gives them two thumbs-up. Willow turns and smiles at him. So does Buffy. Xander starts to head the other way when he is met by Giles.
Giles: I’ve been reading up on my, uh, animal possession, and I cannot find anything anywhere about memory loss afterwards.
Xander: Did you tell them that?
Giles: (leans to Xander’s ear) Your secret dies with me.
Xander: Shoot me, stuff me, mount me.
Giles pats him on the shoulder as he shakes his head and starts walking along the balcony. He leans on the railing and watches Xander go. Xander can’t believe what has happened to him.
END Credits.
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