HERETIC



I.



So amazed I find myself

At how little we’re willing to settle for

When what we dream of

Is far from our grasp…



Can what we want

And what we have

Ever reconcile themselves?

Or will they remain as aloof neighbors,

Nodding in recognition only when the mood strikes

Or when it becomes uncomfortably unavoidable,

Seemingly safer to pretend the two extremes

Never meet on common ground?



II.



I wanted to be his lover

I settle for being his whore

The other woman

Instead of the only

An evening of passion followed by

An afternoon of distant social pleasantries

In the presence of those who don’t need to know…

Should I be sad that the discomfort no longer

Disorients me?

Content in having the stolen, the profane

Rather than the sacred

Of which I dreamt with innocent intention.

Instead of his holy relic

I am his greatest shame.

Instead of my sanctified high priest,

He joins me in hypocrisy

In my vestibule of sacred space

Behind the backs of all the pious parishioners

Who confess their sins to his ears and mine.



III.



If it is a sin, then let me sin!

If I burn in the next life as I burn in this one

Well…

At least the sensation will not be an unfamiliar one.



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