You don't go dancin in the day.

You don't go golfing in the night.

Refusing to pick a card (any card) is evil.

Revealing the end of a movie is evil.

Dave Foley has a good attitude towards menstruation.

You can't water the plants without a whole lotta milka.

There is nobody home.

In England, you only get one spoon. And that's your spoon for your entire life.

Junk mail saved Kevin McDonald's life.

God is dead. And he was very small.

Bruce McCulloch is the cause of cancer. But he's sorry, and he won't do it again.

Terriers average 20 pounds.

Canadians are like Americans, but without the guns.

It is extrordinarily difficult to tell the difference between Dave Foley and an elk.

They love Kevin in France.

The president of the United States is a lying vicious bastard.

Pop cans: money. Office: submarine.

Don’t smoke on the subway.

There are various ways to beat up your dad.

Bank lineups aren’t a problem when the Flying Pig is there.

Just because you stole them, doesn't make them your donkeys.

Politeness is for strangers on a train.

Don't give a Chicken Lady a quarter. Even if it is a mall promotion.

Scott Thompson isn't really a waiter.

You should be suspicious if a pizza guy tells you to call him "uncle pizza man."

Everyone likes a fire. And it's Christmas.

NO ONE UNDERSTANDS YOU!